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Being a sysop or Administrator at Conservapedia is not a task one should undertake lightly. Sysops on CP serve as a group of henchmen, or goon squad, run by Andrew Schlafly. As anyone who's watched more than three Bond films knows, henchmen rarely end the film unscathed. If someone attacks your boss, your job is to take the bullet. If a big boulder is rolling down a hill at the boss, shove him out of the way. Usually, henchmen wear tight-fitting red jumpsuits without undergarments, and this is how CP Sysops are typically dressed as they revert your trolling comments from their
multi-screen 3D supercomputers in their glass corner offices Dells in their trailers.
Conservapedia sysops risk hell fire due to the murderous hate that they collectively feel in their hearts towards vandals and even towards each other. Any good Christian should warn them about
Whosoever hateth his brother is a murderer: and ye know that no murderer hath eternal life abiding in him. 
But sadly the sysops march to their fate with foolhardy lack of concern, indeed no one can warn them without risking a prompt block.
Not all who have blocking power at Conservapedia are called sysops. It's quite complicated, because Schlafly has created a series of smaller "user rights" packages, including making "upload file" and "editing between 0:31 and 7:01 (EST)" special rights. But mostly what gets a non-sysop added to this list are the coveted and dreaded "blocking" rights. In fact blocking abilities are often given before editing or uploading rights.
Theoretically, those editors who are given blocking rights but not promoted to Administrator status are expected to use their blocking powers only to protect the site from vandalism. Over time this rule has been relaxed, and some of these individuals clearly regard themselves as sysops in all but name, blocking lesser users for numerous trivial transgressions.
Ultimately, it became clear that not everyone was able to maintain the level of ignorance, hypocrisy, tyranny and self-righteousness required at Conservapedia. Only a few sysops of the highest caliber have the mental fortitude to continue contributing on a semi-regular basis. As such, the list of currently active sysops (who make about 1/3rd of all the edits there) has shrunk to just 7. (See Conservapedia:Editors' Report Card 2007.) See Conservapedia:Newcomer's Guide for a more detailed guide to the major players.
- Aschlafly* (Bureaucrat, Siteadmin, Sysop)
- Conservative (Sysop)
- Ed Poor* (Siteadmin, Sysop)
- Joaquín Martínez (Sysop)
- Jpatt (Siteadmin, Sysop)
- Karajou* (Siteadmin, Sysop) -
R E T I R E DJuly 2, 2007 back again July 3, 2007 "retired until further notice" September 1, 2008back, YET AGAIN, September 4, 2008
- TerryH* (Siteadmin, Sysop) -
Inactive since Feburary 2011.Returned in April 2011 to link whore his new website.
* Also have SiteAdmin rights to turn on/off the database.
Inactive Current Sysops
- Admin - Inactive since March 2007. (Bureaucrat, Sysop)
- AddisonDM * - One of Andy's unfortunate students.
Inactive since January 2010. Active as of February 2011, participating in class and reverting obvious vandalism, but not actually making other contributions.Inactive since June 2011
- BenjaminS (Sysop) -
Largely inactive since December 2008.Inactive since May 2010.
- BethanyS* (Siteadmin, Sysop) - Inactive since June 2009.
- CPWebmaster* (Bureaucrat, checkuser, Siteadmin, Sysop) -
Largely Inactive since February 2009.Inactive since November 2010.
- CPanel (Sysop) - Inactive since June 2007. Undoubtedly either a sock or meatpuppet of ASchlafly.
- Chippeterson* (Sysop, Siteadmin) - Master of wanted pages, and creator of myriad incoherent cut-and-pasted stub articles. Inactive since April 2011
- ChrisS (Sysop) - Inactive since November 2008.
- CollegeRepublican Schlafly Jr undoubtedly too busy getting laid at college to contribute to Daddy's
high quality encylcopediablog.
- David R (Sysop) - Inactive since April 2008.
- DouglasA (Sysop) - Inventor of a new Conservapedia game: How much content can I delete from the site before its no longer an encyclopedia?  Deleted everything worthwhile. Inactive since May 2011
- DuncanB -
Largely inactive since December 09.Inactive since May 2010
- EdBot - Unplugged since December 08.
- Freedom777 (Sysop) Inactive since July 2008. 
- PhilipB: (Sysop). Inactive since February 2009.
- PhyllisS (Sysop) - Keeping it in the family. (That's Andy's daughter, not his mom) - Largely inactive since August 2010
- RSchlafly (Sysop) - Largely inactive since November 2009. Pops up now and then, but usually disappears after being reminded how insane CP actually is.
- SharonS* (Bureaucrat, Siteadmin, Sysop) -
Inactive since March 09 Back during May 20-27 2009- Inactive again since July 2009.
- Will N. (Sysop) - Inactive since November 2007.
- Ymmotrojam (Sysop) - Inactive since July 2008.
* Also have SiteAdmin rights to turn on/off the database.
Sysop "lite" rights
- Benp: (Block). Promoted in May 2008. Inactive since February 2011. Came back. Then he quit after BestialityaPalooza
- BertSchlossberg: (Block, Edit, Upload). KAL 007 conspiracy theorist. Inactive since November 2010 Came back.
- DeniseM: (Block, Edit, Upload). Promoted very rapidly for biblical insights. Inactive since March 2009.
- DerekE: (Block, Edit).
- DMorris: (Block, Edit, Upload). Promoted April 2011.
- Double Edge: (Block, Edit, Upload). Inactive since June 2010
- Iduan: (Block). Promoted 17 March 2011. Still can't get edit rights, which is all he really wants. Inactive since July 2011
- Jinxmchue: (Block). Ole Jinxypoo may be gone, but his rights remain. Retired June 2010.
- MaxFletcher (Block). Promoted after only 4 days of editing on 17 March 2011. Hardly active since Fall 2011
- MBack: (Block, Edit). Enthusiastic contributor to the Conservative Bible Project. Inactive since April 2010
- MarkGB: (Block, Edit, Upload). Inactive since May 2010.
- PaulBurnett: (Block, Edit). Insufficiently deferential to Jpatt resulting in being blocked on January 19, 2011.
- StevenM: (Block, Edit). Inactive since December 2009.
- SeanS: (Block) Promoted after undoing vandalism sprees. Mikalos on RW, still not demoted R E T I R E D
- SharonW (Block, Edit) Promoted to Block after counterwandal activities and then edit for no apparent reason. Spends most of her time at Ameriwiki, per October 2011
- JamesWilson (Block, Edit) Promoted to Block after his Elvis spree. Banhammered a bajillion and still not promoted further for some reason. Hateful, bigoted man, essentially Jpatt II. Terrorizes Ameriwiki on occasion.
- KhalidM (Block) F I R E D
- BHathorn (Block, edit) Apparently Billy Hathorn. Copypastes his articles on Republican Texan politicians from WP
- Markman (Block, edit) After many minor edits, he was promoted!
- CPalmer (Block) After over three years, he got his banhammer!
- Danq (Block, edit)
- Toadaron (Block, edit)
- Bohdan (Sysop)
R E T I R E D September 11, 2007Reinstated Feb 29, 2008  RENAMED: HenryS - inactive since December 2008, stripped of rights in June 2009.
- Foxtrot: as Bungler (
upload, edit, block) - seems genuine - noncontroversial generally (although deeply homophobic) - PROVISIONALLY DEMOTED for inactivity. (21 Apr 2010)
- Philip J. Rayment* (Siteadmin,
Sysop, Block, Edit, Upload)Resigned from sysop Inactive since March 2009.
- Taj (blocking power).
Largely inactive since February 2009. Returned in May 2009, additional rights bestowed in January 2010.RETIRED AS OF 12 May 2010
- BrianCo: a long-time editor
(Block, edit, Upload), generally far too non-controversial to actually make sysop.Banned for nothing in particular.
- Bugler: not quite a sysop (Block, edit, Upload), but a total wazzock (
almostcertainly a parodist) Admitted to being a parodist.
- ColinR (Sysop) F I R E D May, 2007.
- CPAdmin1 (Siteadmin, Sysop) RETIRED AS OF 12/31/08
- DanH (Siteadmin, Sysop) RESIGNED IN PROTEST June 19, 2008
- Crocoite (Sysop) RENAMED: DeanS*
RESIGNED IN PROTEST June 22, 2008He's back blocking. Appears to have retired after the death of his wife. Rights removed on 8 August 2010.
- Deborah: not a sysop, but has a lot of power - almost as much power as her
redirectedit count F I R E D (05-Dec-08) for "inactivity; also wrong edit to Kosher entry re: fish)"
- Elamdri (Sysop) F I R E D for "inactivity".
- Fox (Sysop) F I R E D for "inactivity" (Back Again, 12/2007) F I R E D for adding liberal lulz. He came back and started blocking again; eventually, got tired of CP's antisemites and quit on November 25, 2008. F I R E D for good on 7-Dec-08 (for inactivity). In January 2009, Teacake banhammered him with the reason "Liberal parodist", yet somehow failed to revert any of his alleged "liberal parody" edits... Fox doesn't really care though - he actually socked up when he knew he was on the way out and used plenty of deep cover IDs to insert some absolutely outrageous material into otherwise innocuous articles.
- Geo.plrd* (Siteadmin, Sysop) -
Largely inactive since January 2009. F I R E D for inactivity.
- HelpJazz: (Block). F I R E D for "inactivity". Disempowered by Andy in preparation for the Great Promotions of 2009.
- Hojimachong (Sysop) F I R E D for "inactivity", actual reason was being RW janitor.
(Siteadmin, Sysop).F I R E D for repeated edit conflicts with other administratorsnot kissing TK's ring. Went silent and subsequently resigned for good some time after the rights were stripped.
- Jinxmchue: the jerk rehabilitation project's finest work! Didn't believe the surgeon general's warning that taking on TK can be hazardous for your health.
- JacobB (Sysop): parodist, F I R E D after he came out.
- Learn together* (Siteadmin, Sysop) - Inactive since January 2009. F I R E D for "inactivity" 22 June 2009
- MikeSalter: (Block) A sock of Bugler who managed to earn block rights within 8 days of creating his account.
- Niandra* (Siteadmin, Sysop) (Note:23:37, 6 August 2007 Aschlafly renamed the user "Niandra" (and moved edits) to "Jallen") Since Andy calls her "Justine", her real name might be Justine Allen. -
Inactive since July 2009F I R E D for "inactivity" 1 Aug 2011.
- RJJensen:(Sysop). - Q U I T after Andy Schlafly deleted his cp:American Jews without discussion in January 2010. Last edit April 2010. Formally desysoped August 2011.
RobSRenamed RobSmith (09/25/07) (Sysop) - Inactive since May 2008 Damn, he's back, as of July 2009F I R E D August 2011 "pending further review" (yeah right) for attempting to reform the cesspit.
- RodWeathers. (Block, edit & upload) F I R E D 31 Dec 2008, because Andy couldn't confirm his name. Later came out as a parodist.
- Sarah B (Sysop) F I R E D for "inactivity".
- Tash (Block, Edit, Upload) F I R E D for inactivity.
(Siteadmin, Sysop) F I R E D 11/2007 for being RW agent, "insignificant" contribs to CP, and general douchebaggery. He's back editing CP, pushing his weight around and blocking. He probably wants his Admin job back. Back in action as of 1/1/2009Died in harness, December 2010. Rights removedimg post mortem on Feb 6, 2010. Permabanned.
- Tmtoulouse lasted about 45 minutes. F I R E D
- Tzoran: (Block, Edit). - Stripped of rights by Andy on 7 Jan 11, after user retired from CP. Blocked by the Assfly on 11 March 2011.
- WesleyS (block) - Resigned March 2009.
- Willminator: (Block, Edit).
F I R E D by Conservative on 14 Dec 2010 Unblocked himself on 31 Dec 2010.F I R E D by Andy and JPatt on 14 Feb 2011 for asking whether TK is really dead.
How to become a CP Sysop
Just how do you become a sysop at CP? Like BethanyS it's by making a lot of edits, being well groomed and educating Andy Schlafly, as well as "being there" during a vandal attack, that's how. But lets have a look in detail at those edits. I have taken some figures (16:04, 5 June 2007 EST) and broken down her contributions since 8 December 2006. This is her complete edit history!
- Dec 8 : 31 edits (6 articles, 1 term, 24 user/talk/images)
- Jan 26: 19 edits (4 articles + 2 minor corrections to own edits, 13 user/talk/images)
- Mar 9 : 4 edits (1 article, 3 terms)
- Mar 16: 1 edit (1 user talk)
- Mar 30: 14 edits (3 articles + 1 minor correction, 3 terms, 7 user/talk/images)
- May 12: 2 edits (2 user talk)
- May 14: 3 edits (3 user talk)
- May 16: 8 edits (1 articles + 1 minor correction, 2 terms, 4 user/talk/images)
- May 18: 3 edits (3 user talk)
- May 19: 3 edits (3 user talk)
- May 22 - BethanyS nominates herself for sysop
- May 22: 14 edits (2 articles, 5 terms, 4 user/talk/images, 3 sysop contest)
- May 23: 52 edits (9 articles + 2 minor corrections, 38 terms, 3 user/talk)
- May 24: 21 edits (3 articles + 1 minor correction, 13 terms, 3 user/talk/image, 1 sysop contest)
- May 25: 8 edits (3 articles + 1 minor correction, 3 terms, 1 user/talk/image)
- May 26: 4 edits (2 articles, 2 terms)
- May 28: 8 edits (2 articles + 1 minor correction, 3 terms, 2 debate)
- May 29: 5 edits (3 articles, 1 user/talk/image, 1 sysop contest)
- May 30: 4 edits (1 articles + 1 minor correction, 1 user/talk/image, 1 sysop contest)
- May 31: 12 edits (1 articles + 1 minor correction, 4 terms, 5 user/talk/image, 1 sysop contest)
- Jun 2: 19 edits (8 articles + 4 minor correction, 2 terms, 2 user/talk/image, 3 sysop contest)
- Jun 3: 20 edits (4 articles, 7 terms, 6 user/talk/image, 2 sysop contest, 1 redirect)
- Jun 4: BethanyS is a sysop!
- Jun 4: 26 edits (2 articles + 1 minor correction, 1 term, 14 user/talk/image, 8 sysops contest)
- Jun 5: 13 edits (2 articles, 11 user/talk/image)
So out of 289 edits:
- 24 User talk (11 own talk)
- 62 Own user page
- 17 Images uploaded
- 78 American History terms (list of links to other pages)
- 9 History terms (list of links to other pages)
- 19 Sysop contest contributions
- 14 Fantasy related articles (elves, dwarves, orcs, Eragon etc.)
- 38 Short articles
- 0 Vandalism reverts
And of those short articles:
- Head : plagiarized from www.DidYouKnow.com (no citation)
- Lemuel Haynes: plagiarized from www.whitehouse.gov (no citation)
- Robert H Goddard: plagiarized from www.siarchives.si.edu (no citation) 
Note that big sister SharonS often has to help out by improving the articles afterwards.
Criteria for sysopship include: two pieces of ID, a personal reference from a teacher, lawyer or clergyman, a notarised written personal guarantee and a sample of DNA.
Sysop Contest Timeline
|9 May 2007||Thresholds of 9700 and 10000 new articles set for next promotions|
|16 May 2007||Bohdan promoted|
|16 May 2007||Joaquin Martinez promoted|
|22 May 2007||Will N. promoted|
|24 May 2007||Threshold 10500|
|31 May 2007||Crocoite promoted|
|31 May 2007||Threshold 11000|
|4 June 2007||BethanyS promoted|
|4 June 2007||Threshold 12000|
|22 June 2007||DeborahB promoted|
|22 June 2007||Threshold 13000|
|4 July 2007||Fox promoted|
|4 July 2007||Threshold 14000 (revised 2 minutes later "because of strong growth" - why?)|
|4 July 2007||Threshold 15000|
|27 July 2007||Threshold 17000|
|7 September 2007||Threshold 18000|
|12 December 2007||Conservapedia will soon promote one or more Sysops, for the first time in months (Main page notice)|
|16 December 2007||Conservapedia surpasses 21000 articles (allegedly)|
|20 December 2007||New user CollegeRepublican promoted|
Match the drug to the admin
"Match the drug to the admin" (NB! this is PARODY) --
- Andy - LSD (where else could all his "insights" come from?)
- Karajou - PCP (explains Angry Bear)
- Bad Touch - Rohypnol (not for personal use...)
- TerryH - Cocaine (all that self-love link-spamming his articles, as well as the sudden temper tantrums
- Jpatt - grass (they say it makes you slow)
- Rob - Cocaine (come on... all that paranoia...)
(disclaimer. the author read about the supposed effects of these chemicals. Any possibility that info was provided by Ace, is purely coincidental.) *sniff*
Adapted from 
List of editors with sysoplike rights
(at 07:05, 12 August 2010 (UTC))
special rights: Block (12), bot (1), bureaucrat (4), checkuser (16), edit (28), oversight (12), Siteadmin (22), SkipCaptcha (3), sysop (35) and Upload (19).
|user||Blo||bot||bur||che||edi||ove||Sit||Ski||sys||Upl||all edits||recent edits||verdict|
|Ed Poor||×||×||×||×||22704||317||Very active|
- Fun:Ed Poor
- Conservapedia:Gang of Four
- Conservapedia:Next sysop pool
- The Stalinist Republic of Konservapediya
- ↑ Sysop is a post that no longer exists at Conservapedia; all former sysops are now Administrators.
- ↑ http://www.skepticsannotatedbible.com/1jn/3.html#15
- ↑ Appears to also be CPWebmaster
- ↑ CollegeRepublican, famously, was promoted to sysop before ever editing, and to date, only ever made two short edits to "breaking news". However, for some unknown reason, he/she/it is still on the "power list". Two edits. Wow, nice "meritocracy" you have on your blog, Andy!
- ↑ Holy crap! http://www.conservapedia.com/index.php?title=Special:Log&limit=500&type=delete&user=DouglasA&month=&year=
- ↑ Also known as the guy who made two mainspace edits and spent the other... 550 or so edits on his Intelligent Design userpage project.
- ↑ 
- ↑ (54 edits from February - August, inactive since August 2009)
- ↑ Siarchives page on Goddard, see 8th paragraph
- ↑ BethanyS' contribution, see section "The First Rocket