David Cameron

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(Other crap goes here)
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Another wizard scheme is getting Tory MPs, many of whom left school before colour television came out, to get themselves more with-it by signing on to [[social networking websites]].<ref>http://www.wired.co.uk/wired-magazine/archive/2010/04/features/david-cameron's-battle-to-connect?page=all</ref>
 
Another wizard scheme is getting Tory MPs, many of whom left school before colour television came out, to get themselves more with-it by signing on to [[social networking websites]].<ref>http://www.wired.co.uk/wired-magazine/archive/2010/04/features/david-cameron's-battle-to-connect?page=all</ref>
  
[[Robert Mugabe]] supported Cameron for Prime Minister.<ref>http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/africaandindianocean/zimbabwe/7370383/Robert-Mugabe-gives-David-Cameron-election-backing.html</ref> No word from Charles Manson or Adolf Hitler as yet. Just sayin'.
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[[Robert Mugabe]] supported Cameron for Prime Minister.<ref>http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/africaandindianocean/zimbabwe/7370383/Robert-Mugabe-gives-David-Cameron-election-backing.html</ref> No word from [[Charles Manson]] or [[Adolf Hitler]] as yet. Just sayin'.
  
 
If one is to believe Steve Bell of the [[The Guardian|Grauniad]], Cameron bears an uncanny resemblance to a [http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/video/2010/may/06/general-election-2010-davidcameron fish in a condom].
 
If one is to believe Steve Bell of the [[The Guardian|Grauniad]], Cameron bears an uncanny resemblance to a [http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/video/2010/may/06/general-election-2010-davidcameron fish in a condom].
  
Much like Tony Blair, his main contribution to his party achieving power was wearing a fixed smile and not saying anything ''too'' draconian while the other party fell apart.
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Much like [[Tony Blai]]r, his main contribution to his party achieving power was wearing a fixed smile and not saying anything ''too'' draconian while the other party fell apart.
  
 
==Footnotes==
 
==Footnotes==

Revision as of 10:09, 15 March 2011

CameronCock.jpg

David Cameron is the current leader of the British Conservative Party, and the current Prime Minister of the United Kingdom. At 43 he is the youngest person to become Prime Minister since 1812 when Lord Liverpool took up the post at the age of 42.

Contents

Personal life and family

David Cameron is an old Etonian,[1] but don't hold it against him. Much. After all, George Orwell was too, although he was a Labour supporter.

He is married and has a son and daughter - his oldest son died in February 2009 from a combination of cerebral palsy and epilepsy.

Cameron is a direct descendent from Queen Victoria's uncle William IV, his great-great-great-great-grandfather.[2]

Policies

Cameron is generally thought of by his opposition as a typical Tory toff and a Thatcherite at heart, despite Cameron's claims to the contrary that he is a "progressive conservative." [3][4] After winning the party leadership in December 2005, he "stepped up his modernisation drive," indicating to move away from the old Tory platform of standing up for big business, scrapping subsidised private healthcare and generally moving away from Thatcherite principles.[5] Having actually achieved power, his party unveiled a series of Thatcherite policies intended to stomp on those at the bottom of the social pile for the benefit of those at the top. He has also placed emphasis on his Party's previously invisible environmental credentials[6] by cycling to work while a car carrying his papers follows him.[7] His stated desire to "stand up to big business" began with opposing a law that would make businesses more socially and environmentally accountable.[8]

One of his policies that he apparently has great passion for is 'Big Society'.[9] Essentially upon raising taxes and slashing spending he's decided to make the services which we tend to rely on be volunteer run and which he then dressed up with the rhetoric of "take power away from politicians and give it to people". This is to help British arts and literature, so the next Charles Dickens won't be short of material. Of course, the 'Big Society' is not another way of saying he wants a small government to save money whilst the people (or as he would call them, dirty commoners) get screwed over.

Other crap goes here

Just a little prick...

He is so slippery smooth that he will be used as the bobsleigh by the British team at the next Winter Olympics.[citation NOT needed]

He has discovered something that was unknown to the rest of the universe: "people don't like paying taxes"; and makes a lot of noise on the subject.

Another wizard scheme is getting Tory MPs, many of whom left school before colour television came out, to get themselves more with-it by signing on to social networking websites.[10]

Robert Mugabe supported Cameron for Prime Minister.[11] No word from Charles Manson or Adolf Hitler as yet. Just sayin'.

If one is to believe Steve Bell of the Grauniad, Cameron bears an uncanny resemblance to a fish in a condom.

Much like Tony Blair, his main contribution to his party achieving power was wearing a fixed smile and not saying anything too draconian while the other party fell apart.

Footnotes

  1. David Cameron's band of Etonian brothers, The Independent, 20 May 2007
  2. Francis Elliott and James Hanning, Cameron: The Rise of the New Conservative (4th Estate, 2007) discuss Cameron's family on pp. 1-9
  3. lol
  4. "Tories in Birmingham" - www.bbc.co.uk
  5. "Cameron says he is breaking with legacy of Thatcher" - The Telegraph, January 2006
  6. Conservatives - Environment
  7. No, we're not making this up
  8. Conservatives’ green credentials exposed
  9. Sounds appealing, doesn't it?
  10. http://www.wired.co.uk/wired-magazine/archive/2010/04/features/david-cameron's-battle-to-connect?page=all
  11. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/africaandindianocean/zimbabwe/7370383/Robert-Mugabe-gives-David-Cameron-election-backing.html

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