Bronze-level articleDavid Icke

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Si vous voulez cet article en français, il peut être trouvé à David Icke (français).
Some dare call it

Conspiracy

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Secrets revealed!
The revealers

David Icke is a human singularity of insanity best known for his UFO and conspiracy theory advocacy. He came to fame as an English footballer and sports commentator and used to be a spokesman for the UK Green Party, but since 1991 has devoted his life to informing the world that it's actually secretly controlled by evil shape-shifting lizard-people from the 4th dimension.

Contents

New Age beginnings

Icke, reptoid-watching.

During the late 1980s while he was still with the Green Party, Icke began to look to alternative medicine for a cure for the arthritis that had ended his football career. This also brought him in contact with the local members of the New Age movement. In 1990, he met a psychic he called his "soul mate" who began to introduce him to hardcore New Age woo.[1] He went off the deep end shortly thereafter. He left the party in 1990 and was formally banned from it in 1994.[2]

Jews Lizards

Icke is a proponent of a super-duper grand unified conspiracy theory that mixes together just about every conspiracy theory you can think of; this he calls the "Babylonian Brotherhood."[3] All members of the media, the scientific community, the banking system, and the religions and militaries of the world's nations are mere foot-soldiers of the conspiracy. These stooges are in turn controlled by the usual suspects: the United Nations, the Bilderberg Group, the Illuminati, the Freemasons, the Council on Foreign Relations, the Rothschild family, the World Bank, etc. All of these groups are merely the puppets of "the global elite," which are controlled by "the prison wardens."

With the release of his book The Biggest Secret in 1999, Icke added the final layer on top of the pyramid of conspiracy: Interdimensional shape-shifting lizard-people from a rift in the space-time continuum near the constellation Draco, often referred to as "reptilians" or "reptoids." Partially ripping off from Zecharia Sitchin, he claims these aliens are the Anunnaki and that they have interbred with humans throughout history. Much of the "evidence" of reptoids Icke and his worshipers put forth are pictures of world leaders with enlarged pupils or red eye - the everyday kind of red eye - retinas illuminated by camera flashes. This supposedly signifies that they have momentarily lapsed in their shape-shifting.[4]

Some people have taken offense to this, claiming that "shape-shifting lizard-people" is a code word for "Jews."[5] While Icke claims that he is not anti-Semitic - and that when he says "shape-shifting lizard-people," he really does quite literally mean that they are lizards - he does hang around with some rather fringe right-wing nutcases, but balances it all out by being just as insane a believer in New Age mumbo-jumbo. It should be noted, however, that he believes the Protocols of the Elders of Zion were true, albeit supposedly not about Jews but (ironically given the accusation of anti-Semitism) a code word for lizard people, and has been flirting with Holocaust denial.[6]

Altie

At this point, it shouldn't be surprising that Icke hawks alt-med and every crank medical idea under the sun through his web site and book store: Homeopathy, vitamin woo, vaccine denial, AIDS denial, Water fluoridation, Big Pharma conspiracies, etc.

Weirdo

In 1991, on Terry Wogan's TV chat show, in the middle of talking about football (the subject he was a guest on the show to talk about), Icke announced that he was "the son of God" and that Britain would be devastated by tidal waves and earthquakes (the UK isn't seismically active). He also began wearing all turquoise all the time which furthered claims he was either disturbed or perhaps a reptilian himself.[7] He was even passed over for Celebrity Big Brother in 2006 for being too weird.

In 2008, he ran for election to Parliament as an independent candidate in the Haltemprice and Howden by-election. He got only 110 votes, and lost his deposit. If the lizard people (who live between Selby and Hull) had let him win, he would not have actually entered Parliament as he vowed not to actually take the oath to the Queen required (as he believes Her Majesty and the rest of the Royal Family to be lizard people as well. Ironically, Prince Charles agrees with Icke on the alternative medicine stuff).

Icke was the only non-American interviewee on the life-saving DVD The Fall of America and the Western World.

Icke considers himself the most controversial writer in the world. Non-British people who don't pay much attention to the weirder sections of the bookstore consider him "who?", which puts him in somewhat the same category Ward Churchill occupies among liberals.

In 2012, he announced that the opening ceremony of the London 2012 games was a satanic ritual designed to harness negative energy, and that "The Olympic Stadium is strategically placed on the earth-energy grid to tap into the immense London and British power centres and this is why Glastonbury Tor, one of the most significant earth-vortex points in the UK, is a centrepiece of the opening ceremony."[8]

Permanently upping the batshit ante

If all of the above wasn't crazy enough for you, Icke seems to have taken The Matrix literally (well, minus the parts with Keanu Reeves and robot overlords). He believes that much of reality is a holographic projection or sensory illusion being beamed down by our alien overlords from the moon. No, really...no, really.[9]

List of people thought to be reptilian overlords

David Icke, trying desperately to get his message through the jamming transmitters of the giant lizards.

If any of these individuals are seen sacrificing children or drinking blood, they should be reported to the zoo constabulary post-haste.

Important Notice

Hail to the chief!

Anyone whose "Legal defense fund" is vital to continuing their work should be approached with caution.

David Icke fashion statements

David Icke, as well as his fans, are well known in popular culture for promoting the aluminum foil hat trend. This trend started as a way of keeping (insert evil conspiracy group here) from being able to read the mind of the person wearing the hat, but the trend has grown to be popular in some mental hospitals, as well as in certain American militia movement meeting places.Joke

See also

External links

Footnotes

  1. Left-Green Perspectives #24, scroll down to "Green Party Co-founder Icke Goes New Age" by Wendy M. Grossman
  2. Greens bar Icke, The Independent
  3. Whether he knows about the actual civilization is unknown.
  4. Seriously, just search "reptoids" in Google images.
  5. The Guardian - Beset by lizards
  6. UK Skeptics on Icke
  7. Wogan interview footage
  8. Opening ceremony 'was a satanic ritual', politics.co.uk, 2 August 2012
  9. Have a peek at his archive for "Moon Matrix" articles.
  10. As far as I am concerned, this disproves his theory right there. If Prince Charles was a shapeshifter, how can you think he'd choose to look like that?
  11. He's still the Premier of Ontario. Source
  12. Proof? "[Boxcar] Willie was a first cousin of actor Tommy Lee Jones who attended Harvard University where he was Al Gore's roommate. Jones is also on the board of directors of St. Mark's School of Texas, an exclusive prep school which he also attended before Harvard. The emblem of this school is an Illuminati-type shield with lion like those of British royalty." from the davidicke.com "Who's seen a reptilian then?" forum
  13. No, not Rowan Atkinson—the actual fictional character Mr. Bean. (Well, in the opening sequence of The Whole Bean he is beamed down to Earth, implying that he's an alien, so...)
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