Oil

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Oil that is squeezed out of the ground, also known as "rock oil" or "petroleum", supplanted whale and other oils in the 20th century, and gave humankind a good hundred years of cheap  energy.  Since these deposits took millions of years to form, when the easy stuff to drill and pump is gone, it's ''gone forever''.
 
Oil that is squeezed out of the ground, also known as "rock oil" or "petroleum", supplanted whale and other oils in the 20th century, and gave humankind a good hundred years of cheap  energy.  Since these deposits took millions of years to form, when the easy stuff to drill and pump is gone, it's ''gone forever''.
  
Oils of varying formulations are used extensively as lubricants to reduce wear in machinery and to improve the experience of [[sex]] and [[sex toys]].
+
Oils of varying formulations are used extensively as lubricants to reduce wear in machinery and to improve the experience of [[sex]] and [[sex toys]].  Do not even think of using oil to lubricate a [[condom]], though.  Use a water-based lubricant, folks.
  
 
Oil can also be used in a crude form of preventative medicine, since a thin slick of oil added to bodies of stagnant water will suffocate mosquito larvae (which could grow up to spread malaria, E<sup>3</sup>, and itchy bites on babies).  This is not practiced as much as it once was, since it also suffocates everything else trying to live in the water.
 
Oil can also be used in a crude form of preventative medicine, since a thin slick of oil added to bodies of stagnant water will suffocate mosquito larvae (which could grow up to spread malaria, E<sup>3</sup>, and itchy bites on babies).  This is not practiced as much as it once was, since it also suffocates everything else trying to live in the water.

Revision as of 02:12, 21 March 2009

Oil is a slippery and flammable liquid. Primarily, oils are composed of long chain hydrocarbons and are apolar, making them non-soluble in, and less dense than, water. Hence, oils will float on top of good old H2O.

Contents

Sources

Oil can come from many sources:

  • It can be squeezed out of plants (this often kills the plant)
  • It can be squeezed out of whales (this always kills the whale)
  • It can be squeezed out of babies (this always kills the baby) never mind.
  • It can be squeezed out of the ground (the ground often recovers)
  • It can be synthesized in a laboratory or factory when special formulations are needed or purities or qualities not refinable from rock, plant, or animal oil are required.

Uses

Plant-based oils are often used for cooking, wood preservation and general waterproofing, and as a base for paint.

Whale oil was used heavily in the past, and through the 19th century, for lamps and heating. This industry led to the near-extinction of many whale species.

Oil that is squeezed out of the ground, also known as "rock oil" or "petroleum", supplanted whale and other oils in the 20th century, and gave humankind a good hundred years of cheap energy. Since these deposits took millions of years to form, when the easy stuff to drill and pump is gone, it's gone forever.

Oils of varying formulations are used extensively as lubricants to reduce wear in machinery and to improve the experience of sex and sex toys. Do not even think of using oil to lubricate a condom, though. Use a water-based lubricant, folks.

Oil can also be used in a crude form of preventative medicine, since a thin slick of oil added to bodies of stagnant water will suffocate mosquito larvae (which could grow up to spread malaria, E3, and itchy bites on babies). This is not practiced as much as it once was, since it also suffocates everything else trying to live in the water.

Nicknames

  • Black gold
  • Texas tea
  • Bubblin' crude

Other uses of the word

  • Operation Iraqi Liberation, or "OIL", was the original (and apt) code name for the 2003 invasion and subsequent continuous occupation of Iraq by the United States.
  • Midnight Oil is a band from Australia.
  • Olive Oyl was Popeye's girlfriend.
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