Bronze-level articleSoviet Union

From RationalWiki
(Difference between revisions)
Jump to: navigation, search
(Corrected information.)
m (Reverted edits by 67.239.32.165 (talk) to last revision by Captain Swing)
Line 1: Line 1:
 
{{bronze}}{{Communism}}
 
{{bronze}}{{Communism}}
[[Image:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|120px|left|The National flag of the Soviet Union.]]
+
[[Image:Hammer and Sickle.svg|thumb|120px|left|This scary symbol is probably why it fell.]]
 +
[[Image:Flag of the Soviet Union.svg|thumb|120px|left|Their commie flag.]]
 
The '''Soviet Union''' was a group of what are now separate countries, dominated by [[Russia]].  Its full name was '''Союз Советских Социалистических Республик (CCCP)''', pronounced "Soyuz Sovetskikh Sotsialisticheskikh Respublik" (abbreviated as SSSR when written phonetically in [[English]]).  The English name was the "'''Union of Soviet Socialist Republics'''" '''(USSR)'''. Interestingly enough, the Soviet Union was ''not'' a union of Soviet republics (''soviet'' is "council" in Russian, referring to a [[democratically elected]] [[socialism|workers council]]), but a one-party [[dictatorship]].   
 
The '''Soviet Union''' was a group of what are now separate countries, dominated by [[Russia]].  Its full name was '''Союз Советских Социалистических Республик (CCCP)''', pronounced "Soyuz Sovetskikh Sotsialisticheskikh Respublik" (abbreviated as SSSR when written phonetically in [[English]]).  The English name was the "'''Union of Soviet Socialist Republics'''" '''(USSR)'''. Interestingly enough, the Soviet Union was ''not'' a union of Soviet republics (''soviet'' is "council" in Russian, referring to a [[democratically elected]] [[socialism|workers council]]), but a one-party [[dictatorship]].   
  
After the fall of the USSR, life actually got worse in Russia for a great many people, as social services were cut back, state-owned property largely fell into the hands of a few "business oligarchs," (who are less charitably called gangsters) many civil rights abuses continued, and the Russian economy entered a deep depression and the poverty rate eventually reached 40%. Economic matters improved somewhat under the administration of President [[Vladimir Putin]], but things have still not improved to the level of the later Soviet years, and some people still long for the [[nostalgia|good old times]] of the Soviet Union. The Russian Communist Party (which is overtly Stalinist) is still the second largest in the nation, and in a country where the ruling party faces widespread accusations of electoral fraud, that is an accomplishment.
+
Although it was a [[Communist]] ([[Marx]] would have called it barracks-communism) nation, it called itself "socialist," in conformance with Karl Marx's definition of that word—a stage of society in which the working class controlled the means of production, which Marx believed would be a transitional phase before the [[State]] "withered away" and [[Messiah|True Communism]] oozed into existence.  This has led to the mistaken notion that ''all'' forms of [[socialism]] — even non-Marxist forms such as democratic socialism—are identical to communism.  The same technique, applied to "[[East Germany|German Democratic Republic]]" or "[[North Korea|Democratic People's Republic of Korea]]" allows us to see that Democracy, Republicanism and Communism are also all the same thing; in the latter case, it also implies that people are all Communists.
 +
 
 +
The USSR was hardly a parade of sunshine and roses, but at the very least the Soviets did see to it that the parts of their population the leaders liked were taken care of.  Mass slaughters and purges stopped after the end of [[Stalin]]'s rule, the sheer brutality of which has been compared to the period of [[Nazi]] ascendancy.  Indeed, after the fall of the USSR, life actually got worse in Russia for a great many people, as social services were cut back, state-owned property largely fell into the hands of a few "business oligarchs," (who are less charitably called gangsters) many civil rights abuses continued, and the Russian economy entered a deep depression and the poverty rate eventually reached 40%. Economic matters improved somewhat under the administration of President [[Vladimir Putin]], but things have still not improved to the level of the later Soviet years, and some people still long for the [[nostalgia|good old times]] of the Soviet Union. The Russian Communist Party (which is overtly Stalinist) is still the second largest in the nation, and in a country where the ruling party faces widespread accusations of electoral fraud, that is an accomplishment.
  
 
==Member "republics"==
 
==Member "republics"==
Line 86: Line 89:
 
*[[Romania]]
 
*[[Romania]]
  
===These were countries that either did not join or withdrew from the Warsaw Pact===
+
===Commies that weren't so loyal===
 +
These were Communist countries that either did not join or withdrew from the Warsaw Pact.
  
 
*[[China|People's Republic of China]]
 
*[[China|People's Republic of China]]
Line 94: Line 98:
 
*[[North Korea]] (Kim Il-sung was really upset at Khrushchev for that whole "peaceful coexistence" thing. North Korean propaganda suddenly became anti-Soviet and denounced Khrushchev as a traitor to communism. Mao Zedong was Kim's new role model. Or at least that was until the Cultural Revolution shocked Kim and prompted him to switch his loyalty back to the Soviets. By this time, the U.S.S.R. was led by Brezhnev, who was more to Kim's liking, though still not quite Stalinist enough for him. Kim would continue to play the Soviets and Chinese against each other for the rest of the Cold War, beginning North Korea's long tradition of being a huge annoyance to its own allies.)
 
*[[North Korea]] (Kim Il-sung was really upset at Khrushchev for that whole "peaceful coexistence" thing. North Korean propaganda suddenly became anti-Soviet and denounced Khrushchev as a traitor to communism. Mao Zedong was Kim's new role model. Or at least that was until the Cultural Revolution shocked Kim and prompted him to switch his loyalty back to the Soviets. By this time, the U.S.S.R. was led by Brezhnev, who was more to Kim's liking, though still not quite Stalinist enough for him. Kim would continue to play the Soviets and Chinese against each other for the rest of the Cold War, beginning North Korea's long tradition of being a huge annoyance to its own allies.)
  
 +
== In Soviet Russia ==
 +
* In the United States, you watch TV. In Soviet Russia, TV watches YOU!!
 +
* In the United States, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, the Party can always find YOU!!
 +
* In the United States, you enrich uranium.  In Soviet [[Chernobyl]], uranium enriches YOU!!
 +
* In the United States, you can say "death to America" and not be arrested.<ref>It helps if you're not a [[Muslim]].</ref> In Soviet Russia...you could pretty much get away with saying that too.
 +
* In Soviet Russia, there is freedom of speech. In America, there is also freedom after speech.
  
 
==OK, comrades.  Time for "Гимн СССР"!==
 
==OK, comrades.  Time for "Гимн СССР"!==
Line 101: Line 111:
 
The original version praised the union forged through "the will of the people."  The chorus implored the Motherland to greatness and its people to follow the red flag to freedom. The second verse praised Lenin for showing the way and Stalin for leading them on.  The third verse encouraged the army to fight on against the "[[Nazi Germany|daring, despicable invaders]]."  This was changed to "we destroyed the invaders" after the war, as demonstrated in this version sung by Paul Robeson.
 
The original version praised the union forged through "the will of the people."  The chorus implored the Motherland to greatness and its people to follow the red flag to freedom. The second verse praised Lenin for showing the way and Stalin for leading them on.  The third verse encouraged the army to fight on against the "[[Nazi Germany|daring, despicable invaders]]."  This was changed to "we destroyed the invaders" after the war, as demonstrated in this version sung by Paul Robeson.
  
 +
{{#ev:youtube|LtU3vUOa2sw|450}}
 +
 +
By the 1970s, the first verse and the first half of the second verse remained unchanged.  However, mention of Stalin's leadership in the second verse had been replaced by praise for the people's righteousness.  In the third verse, mention of the military's victory over the Nazis was replaced by praise of communism's "deathless ideal."
 +
 +
'''NOTE:'''  The version below plays the same 1984 promotional film twice.  The first time has Russian Cyrillic and English subtitles.  The second has subtitles showing the phonetic pronunciations of the original Russian lyrics, and the lyrics in Spanish.
  
 
{{#ev:youtube|rHomETco0MI|450}}
 
{{#ev:youtube|rHomETco0MI|450}}
Line 107: Line 122:
  
 
Intriguingly, both versions of the USSR national anthem and the post-Soviet Russian Federation anthem were written by the same man, Sergey Mikhalkov (1913-2009), who was a real-life example of a "Vicar of Bray."<ref>http://www.economist.com/node/14400914?story_id=14400914</ref>
 
Intriguingly, both versions of the USSR national anthem and the post-Soviet Russian Federation anthem were written by the same man, Sergey Mikhalkov (1913-2009), who was a real-life example of a "Vicar of Bray."<ref>http://www.economist.com/node/14400914?story_id=14400914</ref>
 +
 +
{{#ev:youtube|1ZwpA4L7bws|450}}
 +
 +
==Science in the Soviet Union==
 +
 +
While the Soviet Union made plenty of internationally recognized contributions to real [[science]] (especially in the more socially detached domains such as [[mathematics]], [[physics]] and [[chemistry]]), they had a habit of using spies to rip off First World science (most notably in the case of the "[[Nuclear war|atomic spies]]").
 +
 +
Also, entire branches of science (such as [[genetics]], cybernetics or [[sociology]]) were known to fall out of favor with the Party because of [[nepotism]] and ideological bias, being ostracized as "[[bourgeois pseudoscience]]." Instead, the state invested in dubious research such as [[abiotic oil]] and [[Lysenkoism]]. This was especially true under Joseph Stalin, and faded during the era of Khrushchev.
  
 
==See also==
 
==See also==

Revision as of 08:22, 29 April 2013

Join the party!

Communism

Icon communism.svg
Opiates for the masses
From each
To each
This scary symbol is probably why it fell.
Their commie flag.

The Soviet Union was a group of what are now separate countries, dominated by Russia. Its full name was Союз Советских Социалистических Республик (CCCP), pronounced "Soyuz Sovetskikh Sotsialisticheskikh Respublik" (abbreviated as SSSR when written phonetically in English). The English name was the "Union of Soviet Socialist Republics" (USSR). Interestingly enough, the Soviet Union was not a union of Soviet republics (soviet is "council" in Russian, referring to a democratically elected workers council), but a one-party dictatorship.

Although it was a Communist (Marx would have called it barracks-communism) nation, it called itself "socialist," in conformance with Karl Marx's definition of that word—a stage of society in which the working class controlled the means of production, which Marx believed would be a transitional phase before the State "withered away" and True Communism oozed into existence. This has led to the mistaken notion that all forms of socialism — even non-Marxist forms such as democratic socialism—are identical to communism. The same technique, applied to "German Democratic Republic" or "Democratic People's Republic of Korea" allows us to see that Democracy, Republicanism and Communism are also all the same thing; in the latter case, it also implies that people are all Communists.

The USSR was hardly a parade of sunshine and roses, but at the very least the Soviets did see to it that the parts of their population the leaders liked were taken care of. Mass slaughters and purges stopped after the end of Stalin's rule, the sheer brutality of which has been compared to the period of Nazi ascendancy. Indeed, after the fall of the USSR, life actually got worse in Russia for a great many people, as social services were cut back, state-owned property largely fell into the hands of a few "business oligarchs," (who are less charitably called gangsters) many civil rights abuses continued, and the Russian economy entered a deep depression and the poverty rate eventually reached 40%. Economic matters improved somewhat under the administration of President Vladimir Putin, but things have still not improved to the level of the later Soviet years, and some people still long for the good old times of the Soviet Union. The Russian Communist Party (which is overtly Stalinist) is still the second largest in the nation, and in a country where the ruling party faces widespread accusations of electoral fraud, that is an accomplishment.

Contents

Member "republics"

The Republics of the Soviet Union (1956 — 1989)
Flag Republic Capital Map of the Soviet Union
1 Flag of Armenian SSR.svg Armenia Yerevan
Republics of the Soviet Union
2 Flag of Azerbaijan SSR.svg Azerbaijan Baku
3 Flag of Byelorussian SSR.svg Belarus Minsk
4 Flag of Estonian SSR.svg Estonia Tallinn
5 Flag of Georgian SSR.svg Georgia Tbilisi
6 Flag of Kazakh SSR.svg Kazakhstan Alma-Ata (now Almaty)
7 Flag of Kyrgyz SSR.svg Kyrgyzstan Frunze (now Bishkek)
8 Flag of Latvian SSR.svg Latvia Riga
9 Flag of Lithuanian SSR.svg Lithuania Vilnius
10 Flag of Moldavian SSR.svg Moldova Kishinev (now Chişinău)
11 Flag of Russian SFSR.svg Russia Moscow
12 Flag of Tajik SSR.svg Tajikistan Dushanbe
13 Flag of Turkmen SSR.svg Turkmenistan Ashgabat
14 Flag of Ukrainian SSR.svg Ukraine Kiev
15 Flag of Uzbek SSR.svg Uzbekistan Tashkent

Empire builder

  • Russia

Big countries

Little countries

  • Armenia
  • Azerbaijan
  • Georgia
  • Kyrgyzstan (was known as Kirghizia before the departing Soviets confiscated most of the vowels)
  • Lithuania
  • Latvia
  • The other "Baltic" nation Estonia
  • Moldova
  • Tajikistan
  • Turkmenistan

Took a hike, but someone can't let go

  • Abkhazia (part of Georgia)
  • Chechnya (part of Russia, de facto leveled)
  • Nagorno-Karabakh (part of Azerbaijan, claimed by Armenia, de facto independent for complicated diplomatic and military reasons)
  • Transnistria (part of Moldova)

Satellites

Loyal (mostly) commies

These countries were members of the Warsaw Pact, the mutual defense organization created by the Soviet Union to keep its friends close and its enemies closer. East Germany was reunified with West Germany in 1991; Poland, Hungary, and the Czech Republic are now NATO allies, much to the great annoyance of Russia. The Warsaw Pact did not survive the end of the Soviet Union and now none of its former member countries are communist any longer.

  • Albania (withdrew from the pact after the split between Mao and the Soviets, now fiercely pro-US even by post-Soviet NATO member standards)
  • Bulgaria
  • CzheckzoChekovCheckerCzechoslovakia (broken in two after the dissolution of the Warsaw Pact to make spelling easier)
  • East Germany (DDR)[2] (Many older Germans still speak of "the wall in the mind," and there's still a substantial disparity between east and west even now, but by all indications younger Germans don't really get the fuss.)
  • Hungary (withdrew from the Warsaw Pact after the 1956 revolution but was forced to join again after the Soviet Union invaded it and crushed the revolution). Hungary took a more liberal approach to communism (known colloquially as "Goulash Communism"), which allowed, among other things, the marketing of the Rubik's Cube in the 1980s.
  • Poland (don't forget them). The people of Poland were permitted a remarkable array of personal freedoms and liberties alien to other countries behind the Iron Curtain, partially due to overt Western pressure (hundreds of thousands of Poles fought alongside the allies against the Nazis) but also because of the continued influence of the Catholic Church within the country. In the 1980s Poland formed the biggest threat to the well-being of the entire Soviet empire: the independent Solidarity trade union led by Lech Walesa, which galvanised an inchoate natural opposition to Soviet hegemony, and Pope John Paul II, a Polish native, provided an inspirational figurehead for the deeply Catholic nation.
  • Romania

Commies that weren't so loyal

These were Communist countries that either did not join or withdrew from the Warsaw Pact.

  • People's Republic of China
  • Yugoslavia
  • Vietnam
  • Afghanistan (as in, not quite, but bloody and pointless enough)
  • North Korea (Kim Il-sung was really upset at Khrushchev for that whole "peaceful coexistence" thing. North Korean propaganda suddenly became anti-Soviet and denounced Khrushchev as a traitor to communism. Mao Zedong was Kim's new role model. Or at least that was until the Cultural Revolution shocked Kim and prompted him to switch his loyalty back to the Soviets. By this time, the U.S.S.R. was led by Brezhnev, who was more to Kim's liking, though still not quite Stalinist enough for him. Kim would continue to play the Soviets and Chinese against each other for the rest of the Cold War, beginning North Korea's long tradition of being a huge annoyance to its own allies.)

In Soviet Russia

  • In the United States, you watch TV. In Soviet Russia, TV watches YOU!!
  • In the United States, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, the Party can always find YOU!!
  • In the United States, you enrich uranium. In Soviet Chernobyl, uranium enriches YOU!!
  • In the United States, you can say "death to America" and not be arrested.[3] In Soviet Russia...you could pretty much get away with saying that too.
  • In Soviet Russia, there is freedom of speech. In America, there is also freedom after speech.

OK, comrades. Time for "Гимн СССР"!

From 1917 to 1944, the Internationale served as the Soviet national anthem. During the Great Patriotic War (as the Soviets called it), the Kremlin decided that their soldiers would respond more forcefully to an anthem that focused on nationalism rather than on the struggles of the international labor movement (thus de facto admitting that their underlying ideology was complete dreck, but everyone who was keeping track had been purged by then). Thus, the resulting anthem, "Гимн СССР" ("The USSR Hymn"), ranks as being perhaps the most bombastically nationalistic national anthem ever written.

The original version praised the union forged through "the will of the people." The chorus implored the Motherland to greatness and its people to follow the red flag to freedom. The second verse praised Lenin for showing the way and Stalin for leading them on. The third verse encouraged the army to fight on against the "daring, despicable invaders." This was changed to "we destroyed the invaders" after the war, as demonstrated in this version sung by Paul Robeson.


By the 1970s, the first verse and the first half of the second verse remained unchanged. However, mention of Stalin's leadership in the second verse had been replaced by praise for the people's righteousness. In the third verse, mention of the military's victory over the Nazis was replaced by praise of communism's "deathless ideal."

NOTE: The version below plays the same 1984 promotional film twice. The first time has Russian Cyrillic and English subtitles. The second has subtitles showing the phonetic pronunciations of the original Russian lyrics, and the lyrics in Spanish.


After the collapse of the Soviet Union, another national anthem was commissioned. But the Rooskies didn't like it. As bombastic, nationalistic, and over-the-top as Гимн СССР's lyrics were, its melody and harmony rank among the most gorgeous of any national anthem ever written[4]. So about five years later, the Russian Federation reintroduced "Гимн СССР" with new lyrics. (Although they did keep the first lines of the chorus -- Славься Отечество, наше свободное! -- which (roughly translated) means "Sing to the Fatherland and to our freedom!")

Intriguingly, both versions of the USSR national anthem and the post-Soviet Russian Federation anthem were written by the same man, Sergey Mikhalkov (1913-2009), who was a real-life example of a "Vicar of Bray."[5]


Science in the Soviet Union

While the Soviet Union made plenty of internationally recognized contributions to real science (especially in the more socially detached domains such as mathematics, physics and chemistry), they had a habit of using spies to rip off First World science (most notably in the case of the "atomic spies").

Also, entire branches of science (such as genetics, cybernetics or sociology) were known to fall out of favor with the Party because of nepotism and ideological bias, being ostracized as "bourgeois pseudoscience." Instead, the state invested in dubious research such as abiotic oil and Lysenkoism. This was especially true under Joseph Stalin, and faded during the era of Khrushchev.

See also

Footnotes

  1. http://www.thedailybeast.com/videos/2011/10/10/cain-s-ubeki-beki-beki-beki-stan-stan-comment-falls-flat.html
  2. Nothing to do with rhythm gaming or computer memory architectures.
  3. It helps if you're not a Muslim.
  4. Seriously, listen to it without paying attention to the words some time. Particularly one of the versions rendered by a large chorus and full orchestra. You'll feel patriotic all over even if you're not Russian.
  5. http://www.economist.com/node/14400914?story_id=14400914
Personal tools
Namespaces

Variants
Actions
Navigation
Community
Tools
support