Crucifiction

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Christianity

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The fear of burning in hell for eternity combined with the guilt of being the direct cause of the suffering (the torture and crucifixion of Christ) is what keeps Christianity propagating like a virus, eating away at the healthy flesh of humanity as it has been doing for thousands of years.
[1]

Crucifiction is a neologism unwittingly coined by the creative and jazzily helpful Conservapedia editor HelpJazz on December 9, 2007.[2]

Religious mythology[edit]

It refers to mythological stories about religious icons being crucified,[3] or capitally punished by being tied up on a wooden cross, and then miraculously coming back to life. These icons then display the wounds they suffered from the nails and ropes used to afics them to their astounded friends and lovers.

According to at least one source, a second type of mythology involved the Sun. The hot summer sun was crucified at the autumn equinox, after that the colder winter Sun was resurrected to shine in its place. Then during the spring equinox the winter Sun was crucified followed by the resurrection of the summer sun yet again, year after year.[4] Reported chants of "Sun God! Sun God! Ra Ra Ra!" are humorous, but sadly remain unconfirmed.[citation NOT needed]

According to the Elder Edda, the Norse god Odin crucified himself on the world ash tree Yggdrasil as a sacrifice to himself:

I trow I hung on that windy Tree
nine whole days and nights,
stabbed with a spear, offered to Odin,
myself to mine own self given,
high on that Tree of which none hath heard
from what roots it rises to heaven.[5]

Others[edit]

  • Spartacus wasn't crucified as portrayed by Kirk Douglas, but died in battle (so Marcus Crassus claimed, yet remarkably returned to Rome without a corpse or trophy to prove it); but many of his followers were (which is why, regardless of Spartacus' individual fate, we hear no more of him in the histories).
  • Prometheus kinda got crucified (it was likely worse for him than for Christ), but unlike several hours or a few days it was for several thousand years.
  • According to some in the Philippines, it's good in getting spiritual benefits from God.
  • Ice m---- ------g -T does wear a gun around his neck, b----h!!.
  • In the 1982 film, Onan the Bavarian Conan the Barbarian was (sorta) crucified on the "Tree of Woe" and bit the head off a vulture before being rescued by his faithful companion, the high-level multi-classed fighter/thief Subotai.[6]
  • According to a Muslim who was on Fox, but more importantly on Mary Hines' Tapestry (CBC radio), people were killed before they were crucified.
  • One sees an attractive young woman bloodlessly crucified as well as a Terminator model 800 get crucified in the video of the Soundgarden song Jesus Christ Pose (or as Johnny Rotten said it, "Jesus Christ!!  pose").
  • Apparently according to the band Heart, souls can be crucified. Tori Amos kinda attests to it.
  • John Lennon wasn't crucified, but he was shot dead 12 years after that song.

See also[edit]

External links[edit]

  • The Crucifixtion This points out problems with the Christian account of the Crucifiction.

Footnotes[edit]

  1. Christian Morality: Hostile to the Individual and Society (dead link)
  2. raght heah!
  3. Crucifixion was a cruel punishment in the Ancient World and more recently.Crucifixion is still a form of death penalty in Sudan and Iran, and Sharia law allows it. Crucifixion was in no way unusual in the Roman Empire, the most oft-cited example being Jesus.[citation needed]
  4. See Crucifixion of Sun Gods as Atoning Saviours and Sun Gods as Atoning Saviours
  5. The Elder Edda: Hávamál 137. Translated by Olive Bray. Edited by D. L. Ashliman. Accessed February 8, 2015.
  6. Tree of Woe