If atheism is a religion...

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This is a response to Essay:Atheism is a religion.

[edit] If atheism is a religion...

  • Not believing in Santa Claus is also a religion.
  • Unemployment is a job.
  • Not collecting stamps is a hobby.
  • Not playing tennis is a sport.
  • Abstinence is a sexual activity.
  • An empty bowl is a meal.
  • Silence is a noise.
  • Remaining silent is a speech.
  • Not fighting is an act of violence.
  • Bald is a hair colour.
  • Nudity is a costume.
  • Cleanliness is a stain.
  • Empty can be a content.
  • 0km/h is a velocity.
  • 0 g has a mass
  • 0 is a positive number.
  • 0 is a negative number.
  • Sanity is a mental illness.
  • Being dead is an illness.
  • Jewish humor is always self-praising.
  • Empty space is matter.
  • Clear is a colour.
  • Vacuum is a smell.
  • Anarchy is structured government
  • Not watching the Stupid Bowl makes you a fan of hockey.
  • Not watching the Stupid cup makes you a fan of boxing.
  • Not watching boxing matches makes you a fan of archery.
  • Having never cared much for politics, and having never read Mein Kampf, your lack of a criticism of that work makes you a Nazi.
  • Having never cared much for gender politics, your lack of criticism of traditional gender roles makes you a chauvinist.
  • "Nothing" can have a volume.
  • Darkness has a wavelength (see Discworld, where Dark is faster than Light because although Light is fast, Dark can always get out of its way in time).
  • Outer space is a planet.
  • "Nowhere" is a place.
  • "Nobody" is a person.
  • "Nobody" is a public office position.
  • "Nothing" is an object.
  • DC has a frequency.
  • A blank sheet of paper is the Communist Manifesto
  • A stone has an IQ
  • War is Peace
  • Freedom is Slavery
  • Ignorance is Strength (or knowledge)
  • Not kicking cats is animal abuse
  • Not doing drugs means you're an addict
  • Giving birth is abortion.
  • "Gun control" means handing out free rifles and ammunition on the street to anyone, no questions asked.
  • Voting in elections is fascist.
  • Sobriety is a state of intoxication.
  • Health is a disease.
  • Sanity is a mental disorder.
  • Gravity is "just theory."
  • Evolution is "just a theory."
  • Water is a poison.
  • Pacifists are warmongers.
  • Transparency is opaque.
  • Not being part of the KKK makes you a racist.

Please add more.

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