Essay:That midterm raped me
People were saying that it's inappropriate to say "wow, that midterm raped me" after failing a test, since that trivializes a sensitive topic. One might argue that it would be just as insensitive to attempted murder victims, or the families of murder victims, to say "that midterm killed me."
The response might very well be, "the issue is primarily that murder is taken very seriously by pretty much every sane individual in this country, whereas rape isn't always. We don't have a problem where murder (or attempted murder) victims are blamed for their assault--but if a rape victim had acted differently or had done what their assailant wanted, they wouldn't have been raped, so really, it's on them. We don't have a problem where murderers are sympathised with for their crimes--but rapists more frequently are. The fact that no one really takes murder lightly means that there's no grey area where someone might take references to death or killing as validation that it's okay. The fact that we do have that grey area with rape means that that may happen."
I wonder if that's really true; if you carelessly wander into a bad neighborhood, or leave your door unlocked in a high-crime area, and someone kills or attempts to kill you, will no one place any blame on you for your decision? Maybe the difference is that if you're murdered, you're not around any longer to feel bad about being blamed. The pain and anger of the rape victim, on the other hand, may be exacerbated by others' skepticism and blame.
But I think the reason that people say "that midterm raped me" is to emphasize the dismay of realizing that you're powerless to stop what's happening, and the long-term nature of the devastation. If you get murdered, maybe it happens quickly and your pain is over. But if the midterm rapes you, you're in pain and anguish the whole time that it's happening, and suffer afterward as well. There's that sinking feeling of, "Oh my god, I'm going to fail, and suffer the effects on my GPA for the rest of my career" as you realize you can't answer the questions (especially if it's a math or science test requiring you to come up with exact numbers) and that there's no way you can rescue yourself from the situation, which is similar in kind, if not in degree, to the situation of realizing, "Oh my god, he's going to rape me" and seeing there's no way to stop him.
It's an exaggeration, like when poly people say "Facebook sucks. They won't let me list my fiance because he's already married. I feel like I'm in Nazi Germany." Does it trivialize the Holocaust to say that? The whole point of the humor is that a person is deliberately being a drama queen by comparing their banal setbacks to a horrific event. The absurdity of it is self-evident. Arguably, it's a way of feeling not so bad about the events of one's life by, essentially, tacitly saying, "at least I wasn't a Holocaust victim" or "at least I wasn't raped".