Fun:New Gwenson

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I want to create this page in a way that might not get it deleted. Ergo, I want to ridicule it into the ground.

Warning: May cause dumbening
Studies sujest that reedin this stuf mite caws dumbenin.
Plees dunna sownd oot teh wurds.
U mite end up lik mii. Oh noes!


Contents

[edit] Statement

Originally, it was:

New Gwenson is a city in Bangladesh with over 5000 inhabitants. It was once subject to an incident in the 1920's when the mayor John Okewa arrested a atheist for being an atheist. This story was covered by the Zitwong Harold saying that "John Okewa should be proud of himself for arresting a worthless scumbag.

Then it evolved to:

New Gwenson is a city in modern day Bangladesh with about 5,100 inhabitants. It was once subject to an incident in the year 1921 (exact date disputed) when the mayor John Okewa arrested an atheist for being an atheist. This story was covered by the Zitwong Harold saying that "John Okewa should be proud of himself for arresting a worthless scumbag".

Then came a version with a little snark to it:

New Gwenson is a city in Bangladesh near R'lyeh where dread Cthulhu lies sleeping with over 5000 inhabitants. It was once subject to an incident in the 1920's when the mayor John Okewa arrested a atheist for being an atheist not propagating the Old Ones sufficiently. This story was covered by the Zitwong Harold saying that "John Okewa should be proud of himself for arresting a worthless scumbag one who would otherwise cause the town to be eaten last, thus subjecting everyone to horrible madness and torture.


[edit] Specific rant

What the hell are we being told here? My most likely assumption is that atheism is bad because it might have gotten you arrested in a town in Bangladesh nearly ninety years ago. Is that close? If it isn't then we might need to go to the Double Dumbening Warning or the dreaded Triple Dumbening Warning.

Rather than deleteing this masterpiece article, I would like to see our resident New Gwenson expert expand upon it. We should be glad. How many of this rare commodity can their possibly be?

[edit] General rant

Where do these people, with their laser-beam-like anal focus on incredibly odd subjects, come from? Why would anyone bother to write these things? They are so idiotic as to defy reality.

Thank you.

P.S.: Get bent!

[edit] Worship of False Idols

New Gwenson is full of goats. Blasphemy! Idolatry! Thou shalt have no other gods before the Long-eared jerboa! Hurrah for goats! But no Hivers.

[edit] Specific useful information

Edit Warring Warning
This article has been the subject of repeated edit warring.
Although any user is encouraged to try to improve any article, edit wars started by anonymous IP’s or newly-registered users, or disagreeing by deleting, may result in their being blocked without warning.


New Gwenson is a small town in Glamorgan (Wales, UK), that just barely rates a rail stop. It was named for a famous son of a knight named, of course, Gwen, who acheived fame and national prominence in the Second Crusade by dying ignominiously at the hands of some unknown Saracen.

After the A4 bypassed them, they once more fell into obscurity. Once famed for their blown glass industry, they now are resigned to raising sheep to make mutton and sweaters, and more recently, mutton sweaters. In the heyday of New Gwenson, upwards of 15 tourists would enjoy the delay between trains to take in the local delights, including (but not limited to) an authentic blacksmith's shop, and a local lighting factory. Its magnificent mounds of slag make for a childrens' playground paradise, but also invite unflattering comparisons with pre-disaster Aberfan (which is just up the road).

In the final analysis, New Gwenson is just another brick in the wall of South Wales' industrial success and post-industrial decline into hard-to-pronounce Brythonic.

Don't fuck with my factual shit "edits"! Assfly!!! 01:06, 4 January 2008 (EST)

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