Fun:Oenological argument

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The oenological argument has two parts, the particular and the universal.

The particular argument runs thusly: "I drink, therefore I am." This can be seen in some of the early drafts of Pensees.

The universal argument, which is intended to prove the existence of God, runs in this manner: "When I drink, I hear voices. Since I am not insane, they must be God speaking to me."

Benjamin Franklin was a supporter of the oenological argument, or, as he put it, "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."

These arguments are intrinsically coupled with the oenological problem, which can be briefly stated as "What problem? I drink, I fall down. Big deal. I get up. No problem."

It should be noted that Jesus proved his own existence (see, "I drink, therefore I am") by creating wine from water, thus showing that God, His Father, lives in wine. This, however, is used by some extremists as proof that Germans, who would rather drink beer than wine, are not really loved by God.[1][2]

It is also worth mentioning that the oenological argument is the only proof of God's existence which does not have any logical fallacies.

[edit] References

  1. Not to mention the British, who won't even chill their beer before drinking it. Yeuch.
  2. Also not to mention the fact that British beer is so good it doesn't need to be chilled to kill the flavour. Mmmmm
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