Summary of the Book of Genesis
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A Summary of the Book of Genesis, our guide to the first book of the Bible.
Contents |
[edit] Creation
Genesis describes the time from Creation to the descent of the Children of Israel to Ancient Egypt. The first chapter of Genesis is about Creation Week, or the week in which God created the heavens and the earth. God created, in the following order;
- The Heavens and the Earth (Gen 1:1)
- Light, which he divided into "Night" and "Day". (Gen 1:3)
- Heaven (Gen 1:7)
- Land (Gen 1:9-10)
- Grass, Herbs, and Trees (Gen 1:12)
- The Sun and Moon (Gen 1:16)
- Whales and "every living creature that moveth" (Gen 1:21)
- Beasts of the earth (Gen 1:25) (because beasts don't move, apparently)
- (Naked) Male and Female humans! (Gen 1:27)
God gets called, “Elohim” which is plural, when speaking God refers to “we “and “us“. Jews insist it is just a majestic plural and there is not more than one God. [1] Modern biblical scholars theorize that the source of Genesis 1 was actually a litany recited in synagogues after the Babylonian Exile which functioned to unite the congregation in the proper frame of mind for worship. It had, therefore, a Priestly source, as interpreted under the Documentary hypothesis.
[edit] The Garden of Eden
Somewhat confusingly, a second creation myth begins in chapter two, with God then creating Adam out of a pile of dust, and breathing into his nostrils to induce life (Gen 2:7). God then put Adam in the Garden of Eden, which was probably in Mesopotamia (four rivers flowed through the garden, including the Euphrates). He told Adam not to eat from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. This, of course, then raises the question as to why the tree was even there in the first place. God then made a woman called Eve out of Adam's rib.
Next, the serpent came and told Eve to eat the fruit from the Tree of Knowledge. Eve obliged, and gave the fruit to Adam. He ate it, and they committed the original sin. God got really mad, and evicted Adam and Eve (Gen 2:24).
[edit] The fall
There is a whole theology concerning the "Fall" of man that is bound up with the Genesis stories of patriarchs who lived to be seven, eight, even nine hundred years of age. By the time Abraham rolled around, the life spans had fallen to 175 years. His grandson Jacob lived to be only 147. Moses died at the shockingly young age of only 120. So it is assumed that Adam and Eve were immortal until they sinned, and the longer history rolls on from that point the shorter, on average, human lifespans became as the curse of sin corrupted man.
But a very careful reading of Genesis presents something that seems to have been missed, or glossed over. In Genesis 3:22-23 we read, "And the LORD God said, Behold, the man is become as one of us, to know good and evil: and now, lest he put forth his hand, and take also of the tree of life, and eat, and live for ever: Therefore the LORD God sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from whence he was taken."
Very simply, Adam and Eve were not and never were immortal, and God sent them out of the garden to prevent them from eating of the tree of life and becoming so.
[edit] Cain and Abel
Adam and Eve proceeded to get busy, and produced Cain, and then Abel. Cain became a farmer, while Abel became a shepherd. Both of them offered sacrifices to God - Cain offered what he'd grown on his fields, while Abel slew a lamb. God accepted Abel's offering, but rejected Cain's, presumably because the latter did not contain blood. From now on, blood fetish will be a recurring theme. Cain killed Abel out of jealousy in the wheat field. Cain was exiled, and founded the city of Enoch in the land of Nod.
[edit] Nephilim
Some say the "Sons of God" who had sexual intercourse with the "daughters of men" in Genesis 6 were angels, or demons. But loyal angels would never have sex with women, and fallen angels would never be called sons of God. Besides, angels are spirits, and they only obtain bodies for specific tasks, such as wrestling with Jacob. Modern scholarship has "the sons of God" as an earlier, surviving Israelite/Caananite concept of El as head of the heavenly host and Yahweh (and possibly also his wife, Asherah) as children of El, with a level of lower godlings below them. See, for example, Mark Smith's Early History of God.
[edit] Noah's Ark
Adam had a lot of kids. Most of them lived for between 800 and 1000 years. An insane amount of incest must then have occurred. Noah came ten generations later, and because every human being on earth except for Noah and his family were wicked, God told him to build an Ark. At the ripe young age of 600, with the help of his sons, he built the Ark. He then put a male and a female (and sometimes several of each) of every single species on the earth, and set off on the voyage with his sons. After 300 days, give or take, the Ark came to rest on the slopes of Mount Ararat, then God tells Noah that every time you see a rainbow its his way of saying that God's never going to try to drown the Earth again.
After this, Noah planted some grapes and got drunk. Ham (one of his sons) came along and found him drunk, naked, and sleeping. For some reason, Noah then put a curse on Ham's son Canaan, making him and all his descendants slaves of Ham's brother Shem and Japheth. Some fundamentalists believe this that means Ham was the father of all black people (see Curse of Ham), and use this as justification for the slavery of black people.
[edit] The Tower of Babel
Four generations after the flood, Noah's descendants tried to build a tower that could reach Heaven. God responded by confusing the languages of all of the workers, and destroying the tower.
[edit] Lineages
The next part is a list of lineages. It's pretty boring, and irrelevant unless you want to know the name of Noah's great-grandson via the lineage of Shem (as Shem begat Aram, then the answer is Uz). Closer examination reveals that Shem dies after almost all his progeny, up to and including Abraham (the only exception is Eber). That's a fun way to spend 500 years after the flood: watching your offspring die of old age before you.
The time spans between begats provided in this passage were used by the creationist Bishop James Ussher in the construction of a timeline purportedly showing the Earth is approximately 6,000 years old. (If you're interested in details, it was created on the evening of October 23, 4004 BCE.)
[edit] Abraham
The story then shifts to a Babylonian named Abram, who traveled to the land of Canaan with some family. God talked to Abram, and gave him some land, and told him that his descendants were pretty much screwed (confinement in Egypt for 400 years). God then made a covenant with him, and changed his name to "Abraham". This is also the part where God said all boys need to get their foreskin chopped off on the eighth day of their life.
[edit] Sodom and Gomorrah
Next comes the "hottest" part of Genesis, the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah by a rain of fire and brimstone. God didn't exactly specify what was going on there but many interpretations hold he did so because everybody in the cities were gay. Unfortunately God revealed these plans to Abraham who realized that he had a nephew living in Sodom named Lot. Also, the city dwellers had sort of wanted to rape Lot's guests, who were actually angels... BUT, the angels were dudes, making homosexuality the obvious sin in this situation. Somehow consent (or the lack thereof) was not mentioned as one of the problems.
As an extremely considerate and self-sacrificial gesture, the merciful and generous Lot offered to save them from such a horrible sin by selflessly offering his own virgin daughters to be raped instead, but they were too perverted to accept any reasonable and godly solution. Indeed, the Bible proves that this solution could have saved Sodom from destruction, when, in a similar case some centuries later, people that accepted it escaped divine retribution (Judges 19:24 etc). Earthly retribution was needed instead (however, the Children of Israel were still considerate enough to apply collective punishment, as true representatives of God on earth, always ready to carefully and piously enact God's favorite procedures).
Lot took the good people in the city (him, his family, and the two guests) out of the city before God destroyed it. Lot's wife made the mistake of looking back at the destruction, and was turned into a pillar of salt (which was probably worth a fortune in those days!). Then, Lot's daughters seemed to think that the world had ended and attempt to repopulate the world by seducing their dad while he's drunk.
[edit] Isaac
Abraham was married to a woman named Sarah who was infertile. So, he instead had a son with Sarah's slave named Hagar and in those days the kid was considered legitimate. However, Sarah hated this kid named Ishmael and kicked Hagar and her son out of their camp and Arab people claim their lineage from him. Eventually Sarah had a baby boy named Isaac. God told Abraham to sacrifice Isaac at the top of the mountain for no reason. Abraham obeyed and brought Isaac to the mountain, and as he was plunging the knife toward his son an angel swooped down and grabbed his hand. This angel then told Abraham that God was just "testing" him. A ram then conveniently appears out of nowhere, and Isaac sacrifices the ram instead.
[edit] Jacob (aka Israel)
Isaac had two sons - Esau and Jacob. Esau was big and strong, hairy, and the first born, Jacob was cunning and weak and the second born, hence Esau was supposed to inherit his father's estate and blessings. Too bad for Esau, the old man was blind and Rebecca, their mom, liked Jacob better, so Jacob cooked up some soup and gave it to his older brother in exchange for the birthright. Then, Jacob strapped some wool on his arms and fooled his dad into blessing him as the first born. God seemed to tacitly approve of this, and armed with his brother's birthright Jacob set off to find a wife.
Jacob eventually met a nice girl named Rachel and wanted to marry her, but it turned out he was dirt poor and her dad, Laban, made him work as a slave for 7 years to get her hand. Karma must have caught up with Jacob because on his wedding night he got hitched to Rachel's older sister Leah. So, Jacob went back to work for another 7 years and finally got married to the right girl.
Leah was Rachel's older sister. Jacob thought Rachel was more beautiful, and just wanted her, but he was tricked into marrying Leah in order to get Rachel too. Jacob always loved Rachel more. Yahweh compensated by closing Rachel's womb for many years and making Leah as fertile as a bunny. Rachel and Leah were not only Jacob's wives, they shared grandparents with him, making them first cousins. This wasn't a problem, because Jacob's mother and father shared a grandparent and great-grandparent, making them first cousins once removed. Jacob's family tree forked, but only with one another.
He also picked up his wives' handmaidens Bilhah and Zilpah as concubines.[2] As a result, they have a happy family of 13 kids (for the record, the Octomom has 14): sons Reuben, Simeon, Levi, Judah, Dan, Naphtali, Gad, Asher, Issachar, Zebulun, Joseph, and Benjamin, and daughter Dinah. The sons eventually become the patriarchs of the 12 Tribes of Israel, or their touring name, the Israelites. The happy patriarch then gets into a wrestling match with an angel and God changes Jacob's name to Israel (he who fights with God).
[edit] Tamar
The story of Tamar is one of those overlooked corners of Genesis...because it is a story about a very strong woman. Essentially, Tamar was a proto-Ruth, but more edgy. She was a Canaanite woman who nonetheless became an ancestor of Jesus Christ and the mother of an heir of the Blessing. She was married to Er, the firstborn son of Judah. But Er pissed off the Lord somehow, and God had him whacked.
Then by Hebrew law, the second son Onan was required to marry her, which he did. But he wasn't pleased with the thought of just being a stud for Tamar, so at the height of his passion he withdrew from her and let his seed spill on the ground (somehow this part of the story has been mangled to the point where "Onanism" is a word meaning masturbation, but it was coitus interuptus instead). The Lord didn't like that either, so he in turn whacked Onan.
Judah told Tamar to hang out for a few years until his third son, Shelah, was old enough to give it a go. But when the time came, Judah balked, and refused to marry them off, probably because he thought Tamar was jinxed. Well, Tamar was not to be denied. She dressed like a whore and seduced Judah himself after his wife died. He didn't recognize her when they did the nasty. Nine months later she had twin boys, Peretz and Zerah. At first Judah wanted to burn Tamar to death for being a whore and getting prego, but Tamar retaliated by showing a few tokens he left behind on the bedroom dresser when he visited her. With his face as red as a beet, Judah finally acknowledged her sons as his own, and Peretz was numbered in the line of Messiah.
[edit] Joseph
Joseph, the second youngest was his dad's favorite, and, as documented in the musical, got a special rainbow-coloured coat. His older brothers didn't like this, so they did what most other envious siblings would do; they sold him into slavery in Egypt and faked his death. While in Egypt his mistress[3] tried to seduce him, but when he turned her down she claimed that he raped her and as a result he wound up in jail awaiting execution. While in jail he helped interpret the dreams of his inmates (one got his job back in the royal household, the other got executed). Eventually, word of his ability got to the Pharaoh, who let him out of jail so that Joseph could interpret his dream.
The Pharaoh kept having this dream where there were seven fat cows who come out of the Nile and are eaten by seven thin cows. Pharaoh's priests couldn't figure out what it meant, but God, working through Joseph told the Pharaoh that there would be seven years of surplus grain followed by a seven year famine throughout the Middle East. The Pharaoh realized the opportunity, and ordered all the farmers to give half of their surplus grain to the state to stock up for the famine. Unsurprisingly, Joseph turned out to be correct.
The famine eventually hit Joseph's family back home in Canaan who came to Egypt looking for some food. Joseph recognized his family and eventually reconciled with the rest of the Israelites. Eventually Jacob died in Egypt and the Israelites decided that Egypt was not a bad place to live after all. That is, until Exodus...
[edit] See also
[edit] Footnotes
- ↑ What does Genesis 1:26 say in Hebrew?
- ↑ We're not saying that this sort of relationship won't work today, but he'd need a lot of stamina and some really willing partners to try it. It probably wouldn't work, unless you call them mistresses instead of concubines, because concubines may require some sort of formal ceremony/registrations.
- ↑ In case the context, which is rather vague since being a mistress does not preclude one from the ability to seduce a lover that one already has, does not make this obvious, "mistress" here means "owner's wife," not "lover."