05:45, 18 June 2013 (UTC)
WesleyS ( talk | contribs) blocked <insert name here> ( talk | contribs ) with the expiry time of
3 days (account creation disabled)
(Member of vandal/parodist site)
To do list
- Make some sort of Andy robot...
Use the strike out markup
- Randomly generated text, use it
- Make a series of meta jokes
Greetings, Anonymous User (and other stragglers):
I am Yossarian! I'm a
sysop bureaucrat person here at RW, and originally joined because I loved all the fine work that's gone into making life more paranoid and fearful than it already is for Andy Schlafly, amplifier operating theater of Conservapedia.
I am a
university student worthless university graduate, who worked on a lucrative degree in Theatre/Creative Writing. I am also very politically left wing, though I haven't really got a label for it that's more specific than that. Let's just say I'm an anarcho-socialist with tendencies toward statism and a limited form of capitalism. If that makes any sense.
My religious views, like my politics, are distinctly contradictory in some ways, so I'll simply say I'm a very accepting atheist.
I stole my name from Joseph Heller and he can't have it back. You can call me Yossarian, Yossie, Yossy, or Sam. ;)
And now, some light comedy:
"Anonymous User" (your insulting name is getting tiresome), I'm not trying to persuade you, but rather to observe that to this day even the smartest among us exaggerate the risk of eating with unwashed hands contrary to what Jesus simply stated. I've managed to read your rants and you deny that Obama is a Muslim, which is undeniable, so anyone with an open mind can see that you're a product of the public school system. And you persist in denying the obvious truth that that affirmative action causes rather than helps resist Wikipedia bias. You can whine all you want, but every claim of "vestigiality" (an absurdity, I might add) has been proven false about humans, as far as I am aware. The claim about tonsils resulted in the needless death of thousands in improperly subjecting them to anesthesia and removing their tonsils. Are you willing at least to admit that? Warning: keep it clean, and don't speculate about ancient Greece. --aschlafly 05:45, 18 June 2013 (UTC)
 My Fault
 My (real) name in various alphabets and languages
 Things that bother me, with interesting names
- Muscae volitantes
- Schlafly (Try saying it in a really bored, nasally voice with an extremely drawn out "A". Minutes of fun!)
 Links of interest
- ↑ I am also Major Major Major Major at Uncyclopedia.
- ↑ No, it does not.
- ↑ Speaking of which -- to any Armenian speakers out there: how do you spell "Yossarian" in Armenian characters? I've got the faux-Armenian in my sig, but that's just for lulz (to use the vernacular 'round here).
For Yossarian, press twenty-two on your touch-tone now. He's lonely and has flies in his eyes.
| ||As a confirmed mustard jar for taking on this job as a Sysop on RationalWiki: I, Yossarian, pledge to only block users if they ask for it, or insert unfunny vandalism.|
I furthermore pledge that if I indulge in secret private conversations about you, we will make a formal report to the mob. Is that all?
If you impugn my motives without warrant, or challenge my "AUTHORITY", er, there is nothing I can or will do.