Fun:Marmite

Marmite is God's Gift to Man. A wonderfully flavourful, rich, tasty spread, it delights the tastebuds and palate with its complex blend of notes of yeast, salt and burnt something-or-other-that-tastes-like-Bovril (despite its 100% vegetarian origins). It is an effective cure for hangovers, helps the early restoration of amputated limbs, and can be of some help if you have been decapitated. It's also a great way to start any day, when spread thinly on toast with butter, as a delicious midday snack, or with hot water in a cup, forming a delicious thin broth.

Only in the UK can you get away with advertising something by ridiculing the opinion of misguided naysayers who claim that eating your product is like spreading diarrhea on toast and then eating it. Marmite is the most appalling foodstuff in the world. Despite looking like a fairly tasty chocolate spread, it's actually some vegetable extract that is processed to hell, removing any decent flavour from it. It tastes like crap, and is known to induce vomiting on sight. Marmite was used as a punishment for naughty school children but it was considered too cruel and unusual so was replaced by the cane.

Only in the UK can you get away with advertising something based on how bad something is. Marmite is actually a 100% vegan-approved product, and is made entirely from yeast by-products. Its origins were the brewing industry, as it was made from the leftover yeast scraped from the insides of the brewing vessels. Yum!

Holy wars
Marmite is delicious. Marmite in New Zealand is different to Marmite in the UK. What the British call Marmite is what New Zealanders call Vegemite and it is truly revolting stuff. New Zealand Marmite is best enjoyed on toast with a heck of a lot of butter. Marmite is horrible. Marmite in New Zealand is different from Marmite in the UK. What the British call Marmite is what New Zealanders call Vegemite and it is truly awesome stuff. New Zealand Marmite is best enjoyed on toast with a heck of a lot of butter. The Marmite vs. Vegemite debate is almost like the PC vs Mac vs Linux debate. Which one corresponds to which, no one knows...