User:Xena

I practice the 10/90 Rule. Ten percent of my edits are pure gossip and the other 90 percent of them are wasted on making RationalWiki a better project.
 * User:Xena/sandbox

Diary:


 * If we were restricted to biofuel, would our 737s be packed with people going to and from Vegas? Would SUVs clog the freeways? If we can't scale biofuel to support our 20th Century style energy-mining economy, there will be a die-back of billions of people. Our modern civilization is only possible because we can extract fossil fuel at a faster rate than we can convert sunlight to fuel. Green energy is about farming energy rather than mining it
 * The government wants to spend six hundred kerjillion dollars because it has discovered that half of all schoolchildren test below average
 * I'll listen to what the Pope has to say about two womenfolk getting hitched after he dumps the pedophiles. I'm not holding my breath
 * Ronald Reagan is spinning in his grave so fast if you hooked him up to a generator he'd qualify for a green energy tax credit
 * The Pope could say Elvis sits next to JFK in the cockpit of a UFO and that's what Holy Mother Church must believe and teach
 * If Vaginas had teeth then the dental profession would rank up there with OBGYN in popularity among prospective students
 * Republicans sleep in twin beds; that is why there's more Democrats
 * Good news! The rate of increase of the rate of GDP decrease is decreasing.
 * Japan and South Korea are gonna nuke up after Li'l Kim's rocket launch, because Obama is all yack and no shack
 * Jesus, who is all about sharing things, probably thinks the concept of a PERSONAL savior is pretty selfish.
 * Some people like learning Eskimo, but I can't get Inuit.
 * I am Pansexual. I am weirdly attracted to actresses like Sandy Duncan who dress up as Peter Pan.
 * What's interesting to me is where did Mormon's learn to go to Church on Sunday if the Nephites originally kept Saturday sabbath


 * To further highlight divorce as a sacrament reserved only for heterosexuals, Rush Limbaugh has obtained THREE divorces.
 * Virus checker 100% complete, all viruses functioning normally
 * I am currently Watching 10,000 BC. Obviously it is a godless lib propaganda film, because 10,000 BC predates a 4,004 BC creation.
 * Dollars to donuts Rick Santorum comes out and says the marriage equality decision in Iowa and Vermont will lead directly to man-dog nuptials.
 * Russia warns US on Georgia. Obama responds by beefing up troop presence at Fort Benning, GA
 * Only 0.14% of earth and life scientists accept a literal biblical creationism...no wonder Bush thought science was the devil's tool
 * Representative Eddie Bernice Johnson said Bill Clinton was the first black President, so that makes Obama an also-ran.
 * When given a choice between two evils, I always pick the one I haven't tried yet.
 * Reading J.R.R. Tolkien is very Hobbit forming.
 * Remember when safe sex meant having the emergency brake set?
 * Kiss your girlfriend where it smells...take her on a date in Tacoma, Washington!
 * Rush Limbaugh looks like Goering but sounds like Goebbels.  Irony: Rush Limbaugh saying that dittoheads think for themselves.  Rush is so narrow minded he can look in a keyhole with both eyes.  What's the difference between the Hindenburg and Limbaugh? One is a flaming Nazi gasbag, and the other one is just a dirigible
 * Atlas Shrugged coming to a theater near you. And we just sat through eight years of The Handmaid's Tale
 * Gabrielle is breathtaking! Every few hours she stops talking and takes a breath.
 * Mr. Obama appointed a Nobel-prize winning physicist to head the DoE because unlike Bush he doesn't think science is a tool of the Devil.
 * Don't put off till tomorrow what you can put off till the day after tomorrow.
 * Disproving evolution has nothing to do with proving creationism.
 * If Men Ruled The World Hallmark would make "Sorry, what was your name again?" cards.
 * I think we evolved from amino acids in the primordial ooze. From Goo To You Via the Zoo.
 * I thought Gabrielle was having a 4-hour orgasm, then I realized she was epileptic.
 * Peter Madoff Must Scrape By Somehow On $10,000 A Month
 * In home schools they only teach the three "R"s...Reagan, Rush and Republicanism.
 * Obama must be doing great. That's why Conservative Republicans Against Progress (C.R.A.P.) hate him so
 * Of course the Mormons and Catholics will mobilize to put same-sex discrimination into the Iowa constitution to address the oversight that gays and lesbians are fully human.
 * Eating yogurt will improve your sex life. Women know that if you'll eat that stuff, you'll eat anything.
 * The epitome of love and trust is oral sex between cannibals.
 * If the hayseeds in Iowa legalize same-sex marriage, it will shame the "cosmopolitan sophisticates" in Oregon and Washington into doing it.
 * God made conservative women more attractive to compensate for Republican "I Love Lucy" habit of sleeping in separate beds.
 * China was feudal until 50 years ago. In feudalism it's your Count that votes.
 * A new study says masturbation is a better cure for sinus trouble than medication. That might come in handy
 * Math problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)2]-[sin(xy)/2.362x]. Math and Alcohol don't mix: please don't drink and derive.
 * Men's name for their clothing is "That Shit On The Floor" as in "Honey, I done told you to pick up That Shit On The Floor!"
 * I decided that I was a Taoist after everyone kept telling me that I was in the Way


 * Go to church and they say "Stand up for Jesus!" Go to the final game of the World Series and everyone yells, "For Christ's sake, sit down!"
 * I just tested out my pit bull. Ever hear a mime scream?
 * Q: What would Ronald Reagan be doing if he were alive today? A: Clawing at the top of his coffin
 * Never criticize a woman until you've walked a mile in her shoes. That way, when you do, you'll be a mile away...and you'll have her shoes!
 * Oprah Winfrey virus : Your 200GB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80GB, and then slowly expands back to 200GB
 * Sixty-five million (32%) of American women are overweight. These are round figures
 * There is no more "Global War on Terror". Obama now calls it "human caused disaster" allowing for climate change to fall under the same umbrella.
 * Sex is a misdemeanor - The more you miss de meaner you get.
 * The Japanese say we Americans are lazy? Hah! We cook our fish!
 * Lucy Lawless turned 41 on March 29th. She will star in a new show playing the girl who buys Spartacus to be her slave. I just got one thing to say: "I AM SPARTACUS!!!!!"
 * Conference on Multiple Personality Disorder? I've half a mind to attend.
 * The difference between the Amazon village and a circus is that the circus is filled with cunning stunts.
 * Just what the Global War on Terrorism needed. Extra innings in Afghanistan.
 * Becoming informed without Faux Noise Channel is like attending an important foreign film without five screaming babies.
 * Rachel Maddow for the conversation, Tina Fey for the wankable Vanity Fair cover
 * Pope goes to Mount Olive. Popeye vows revenge.
 * A kiss is an application for a better position.
 * The Federal government shifts wealth from taxpayers to farmers NOT to grow potatoes, but the farmers are worried about the "socialism" of General Motors being nationalized
 * Why don't Fundies ban that one book where a male character named David proclaims that his love for Jonathan surpasses his love for women?
 * Never criticize a woman until you've walked a mile in her shoes. That way, when you do, you'll be a mile away...and you'll have her shoes!
 * Oprah Winfrey virus : Your 200GB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80GB, and then slowly expands back to 200GB
 * Sixty-five million (32%) of American women are overweight. These are round figures
 * There is no more "Global War on Terror". Obama now calls it "human caused disaster" allowing for climate change to fall under the same umbrella.
 * Sex is a misdemeanor - The more you miss de meaner you get.
 * The Japanese say we Americans are lazy? Hah! We cook our fish!