Conservapedia:What is going on at CP?/January 2008

Hey atheists, you have no absolute moral standards so stop making excuses while I insult you. (Commented OUT on WIGO preserved here in archives. Warren Terra) {{wigo
 * Ah, the power of Conservative Dishonesty. Teh Foxpuppet makes a series of replies to user TheGuy, immediately after blocking him for a month. Dude, if he's pwning you in an argument, be a man for once and just admit it and move on.
 * The requirement that CP accounts use the person's real name seems a bit arbitrary. Accounts are blocked for this&mdash;by ASchlafly (30 since mid November), TK (9), DanH (4), Iduan (2), BethanyS (2), DavidR (1), MexMax (1). But the funny thing is: one never sees blocks for this from such stalwarts as Karajou, Crocoite, Conservative, LearnTogether, or HelpJazz.
 * I guess you have to have them, to have them...
 * Sometimes, it's really, really hard to tell parody comments from the real thing
 * Iduan apparently ordered the Secret Book of CP Rules via Amazon  he finally realized that fact tags are evil
 * How do you get a Breaking News item posted? Easy, just bash Wikipedia while suggesting it! And note that CP would never use the word "freedom fighter" to describe a terrorist organization. Well, almost never.
 * Um...Iduan, poor Molly hasn't edited any "Talk" pages.
 * In answer to OurMike's compelling request, Andy's final reply: call Richard Dawkins and tell him that he is not a professor.
 * Familiar words in a different context: Conservative Bias As you exit the plane, please note the "misleading" words are almost the exact same as used in the opening of the Liberal Bias Page
 * Anyone else remember when Britney Spears used to promote chastity and Christian values?
 * Probably time to give up and move on, TheGuy. CP has decided that if you are in Hollywood and you die of anything other than old age, then it is due to "Hollywood Values" and no amount of reasoning or logic will persuade them otherwise. Update: Now, we all know CP won't listen to reason, but Fox puts it most aptly ever: "we just don't care".
 * Andy moves the goalposts yet again. The best editor will be promoted to sysop when CP achieves 14,000, 15,000 , 17,000 , 18,000 , 21,000 , 25,000 new articles.
 * Andy, the idea of compliments is that you usually direct them to other people's work, not your own
 * Do not copy from Wikipedia (unless you happen to be a sysop? lol, check out the "edit this box" in the template  it even links to wikipedia). UPDATE: Template king "I'm leaving and never coming back" Iduan fixes it but still perpetuates the mis spelling of November (Come on guys, we can't do everything for you!). UPDATE You're welcome, HelpJazz.
 * This great article by a sysop manages to go from odd ("the XX century") to bad (third sentence seems to miss a few words) to worse (fourth sentence has no verbs).
 * Well naturally, any editor to CP must be a guy, even when she's female. This is totally obvious because women aren't allowed to teach. Hey, it's God's law, not mine!
 * I know that the wiki software has isses with the "&amp;" symbol in article titles, but that doesn't mean that "T & R Enterprises, Inc. v. Continental Grain Co." should simply be called "T" (minor update: "T" got deleted, so just linking to deletion log now)  Update: Finally...
 * Slayer is not a notable band, yet MxPx is.
 * Ed Poor, once one of the senior and more powerful sysops on the site, now gets shoved around even by Bethany.
 * Two Lulz for the price of one: CP is not "Ameripedia"  do not be fooled by the big flag in the logo! Also, Andy loves British people, and looks forward to the day when they can be just like him.
 * Less than five minutes after signing up Andy blocks this user for an unproductive edit. It makes you wonder what this edit was, given that it left no trace.
 * Third try's the charm?
 * Third try's the charm?
 * Does this mean Iduan might return? Oh, my, it looks as if he's stopped imbibing the kool aid and has started to mainline it!
 * Bethany's rationale for free use appears to be in contradiction to that of wikipedia
 * Suggesting that some of the problems in the British NHS may be due to contracting out (private cleaning services and MRSA anyone?) is, of course liberal deceit
 * No hate fueled smearing on this site
 * For a site that loves Bush, hates the ACLU, and rejects the very notion of a "right to privacy," does this seem a bit out of place?
 * How can you add insult to injury when handing out infinite bans? Invite him to come back later.
 * DanH begins to see the double standard of CP embracing every scandal around a liberal while labeling any scandal around a conservative as gossip... but doesn't do anything against it.
 * Well, actually, yes, some do say that.
 * The Schlafly brothers disagree again on Quantum Mechanics. Will Roger be banhammered?
 * Also verboten on CP  mentioning UN positions held by pretty girls. Why, Assfly? Tell me why you made that edit.
 * This is old, but Conservapedia is currently hosting a copy of the Communist Manifesto.
 * This isn't going on now, but it was once, and it's still funny today. Notice how, if you close your eyes, it's hard to tell whether Conservative is serious, or a bad parody.
 * WOOHOO! An 11 year old boy who was partially deaf for nine years is suddenly cured! It must be a miracle of the Lo oh, wait, maybe not.
 * Andy: Hello, DanH: Goodbye
 * Since we refrain from noting every instance of CP's continual "Latest death gives us something to bitch about" we'll just include things notable like maybe it's sinking in that it's not a Good Thing to do.
 * Is Order accusing Andy of deceit? Or just being dubious?
 * Fear mongering at its best: "2 young women die in the U.K., three in the U.S., and 28 suffer miscarriages after receiving the HPV Vaccine." What does the source say? "Neither U.S. nor European health officials have directly linked the deaths or miscarriages to Gardasil. The FDA has said there is no reason to reexamine approval of the drug."
 * Barikada is not a complete prude, this can only end one way.
 * Would someone please tell me which definition of the word "liberal" is elastic enough to include Suharto? Answer: this one
 * Concise!
 * Maybe, just maybe, it's the fact that newspapers are now being forced to put their entries online for free, and thus less people decide to pay for what they can get for free (that's not exactly a revolutionary concept)
 * Andy doesn't like it when people point out that his arguments rely on accusations and logical fallacies. Nope, really doesn't like it...
 * ANDY Finally responds! Andy just responded to the section that Iduan started  who thinks he gave Iduan rights? Who thinks he turned him down? Who thinks ... he completely ignored Iduans comment while at the same time deciding a troll needed to be responded to
 * Bye Iduan  Update: "Karajou unblocked #24543 (Yes, you are wanted by this site...now get over it!)"   "...but we still won't give you edit or sysop rights."
 * Iduan tells people to be more specific with their mainspace edit summaries. Which would be nice, if Iduan wasn't the guy who simply uses the summary "re" for most of his talk page posts...
 * True to CP form, PJR replies to a perma banned user as if nothing had ever happened.
 * Iduan's last stand
 * Ladies and gentlemen, I proudly present, the greatest conversation in satire history! And none of these users are banned yet. Andy's slipping...
 * Well this seems a little too neutral and accurate to be on Andy's blog...oh...it's by Joaquin. How long before Andy inserts the phrase "affirmative action candidate"? The countdown begins...
 * Say Ed, what happened to "it's not being gay, it's acting on it", you enormous hypocrite?
 * The irony is so thick you have to cut it with a chain saw.
 * Toujours Pur: Andy is busy alienating several users these days, giving ban threats just because he disagreed with these edits
 * Scientists are on the verge of creating life via science, which proves the existence of God. Wait, what?
 * Oh, Iduan... we had so much faith confidence <!  faith is, of course, a uniquely christian attribute.... or so I've heard   > in you. But then... (Follow the revert war through the diffs...) *sigh*
 * Continuing the Carlin quote theme "(pro lifers) are not pro life they're anti woman" and I think Karajou just proved it*
 * Of course it is. No loss though. As George Carlin said, "ever notice that people who are against abortion are people you'd never want to fuck in the first place?"
 * I don't know what's better  Schlafly's latest neologism, the fact that it gets all of 23 Google hits, or what 8&oe=utf 8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en GB:official&client=firefox a Google thinks I'm actually looking for...Freudian, much?
 * Schlafly statistics to the rescue. Fortunately Aschlafly's 5% claim cannot be proven wrong, as even when confronted with evidence, he is the sole authority on conservatives.
 * Just what the fuck is this? Well, it's one of these.  UPDATE: Ouch!
 * The pride of the Navy stands his ground and gives no quarter, Damn the torpedos facts, full speed ahead!
 * Though it should surprise no one, CP once again completely misrepresents another study on the front page. What the study actually says is that liberals and conservatives rated each other almost identically. The differences only emerged when two specific people were rated: Bush and Cheney. Of course, CP and the opinion piece they use as a "source" use this single example to completely twist the study's findings.
 * WOW! What a clean, informative,  educational liberal entry this was! Update:PJR is going soft? Two more: Drugs are really bad, dammit! Also, two more sysops disagree with Andy! At least it's concise, (once again).
 * Andy and co have worked really hard on the Hollywood Values monstrosity. Don't try to improve the article in any way, for example, by adding actual quotes, or else feel wrong end of Andy's banhammer Thank God and difference number 5 that NONE OF THIS IS GOSSIP. UPDATE: Singers are part of Hollywood now.
 * Well, this is at least as reliable as Andy's dinner conversation.
 * With a simple Freudian slip, does MexMax reveal he's actually a parodist?
 * I'm sure Andy's soon to come clarifications on block rules will be carefully observed by all CP sysops. UPDATE: "We don't block purely for ideology". Oh, right.
 * Andy brings use of the post hoc fallacy to new heights, somehow believing that JK Rowling was invited to speak at Harvard because one of her characters is gay, not for being, you know, just about the most successful author in history or anything.
 * DanH is insulted that he was called a liberal parodist. Isn't that #12 and #37?
 * Andy resorts to number 19 in the Liberal Style and gets Bitch slapped for his efforts*
 * Edit Wars! Joaquín Martínez and StephenW argue over whether abortion is murder. Update: Edit war is over  Joaquín finally remembered that being a sysop makes his content more right.
 * User:TheGuy slaps down Godspeed. How long before he's banned? UPDATE: Not Long
 * Find out where they stand. All your favourite fundies declare their preference on cp:User:CPAdmin1/Election08. Update: Joaquín Martínez apparently decides that, since sysops are above the rules anyway, they should be allowed to vote twice
 * Leave it to Andy to cram so much idiocy into two short paragraphs. Their edits "are span the political spectrum", you know. (Yeah, from Far Right to Ultra Right. And while "Liberals try to smear people they don't like", mention of Conservatives doing similar is conspicuous by its absence...)
 * What hurt Ed's feelings?
 * Liberals  especially of the Hollywood variety   value disease.
 * Liberal supremacist. How precious.
 * "Virtually every study" shows that guns deter and prevent crime. Interestingly, Andy has not mentioned a single one of those studies.
 * Nighttime editing: Shit hits the fan
 * Well, it "isn't news", but the death of actor Heath Ledger is worth making a cheap political slur...UPDATE: Schlafly darest not speak his name for some reason. FURTHER UPDATE: According to self proclaimed medical expert Andy Schlafly, "28 year olds do not just die naked on the floor of natural causes." I guess that's one less thing to worry about, then.Update: Pwned!
 * Thank god liberals have Conservapedia to decide their views for them
 * What could Fox possibly have against bacon? Is there some kind of librul bias when it comes to the cooking of some good, old fashioned pig? Oh... UPDATE: Fox continues his Battle of the Swine.
 * Conservapedia touts the installation of metal detectors in some schools in Britain for the detection of knives as a failure of gun control. Of course, as we all know, such measures are completely unknown in America, so lack of gun control clearly works.
 * Contest 4 hasn't even been judged, and Andy already considers CONTEST FIVE! Of course, it's because his team got pwned in C4 (as far as anyone can tell) and he wants a rematch! Update: Andy shows just what a sore loser he is.
 * And around we go again! (Shortest unblock period yet. Conflict of interest much Fox? Not that this is Lebanon_conflict&diff=377693&oldid=260354 new for you.)
 * Once again teh gays are triumphant!
 * For sheer bloody nonsense it's hard to beat Andy,and it's all his own work. You gotta admit, though, this response by Andy is pretty funny.
 * Mockery over the FBI Incident just won't go away! (Commented OUT on WIGO preserved here in archives. Warren Terra)
 * OCD I haz it. I haz it bad!
 * Is this comment by HelpJazz a criticism of the NY Times or a subtle dig at CP's breaking news section? It's honestly hard to tell.
 * How to make 15 points: Take a 885.html FindLaw article, search for a snippet (starts with "Well into the 18th century..."), then just stretch, pad, and rephrase it a little bit (Rule of thumb: If I only need two Google queries to pinpoint your source, you're doing it wrong). Ta da, a Quality New Article  and it's not completely copied!
 * It's the last stretch of the contest, and it looks like Andy might lose! You know what that means. Time to announce that he'll challenge the other team's contributions.
 * Behold! The heavens part, and brimstone and fire... hail down onto TK, who gets a 1 year ban for bullying. And what happened this time? site_harassment.2Fintimidation This happened.
 * Thank you sir, may I have another? Please, do me!
 * Talk nicely, or else!
 * But wait  I thought newspaper reading was a BAD thing?
 * Andy's Death question: have we exploited someone's death to make a cheap political point? Yes we Have*
 * Good call Phil, God knows that right wing people never disrupt and threaten things they don't like while protesting*
 * According to BethanyS, the first black scientist  ever   was born in 1731. Hmmmm.
 * Wikipedia's liberal bias is censoring an bigoted neologism
 * Conservative is back! He starts an article about atheism and Christianity which, at current date, tells us, "there are books out there on this topic." Thanks, Ken! Update: Some quotes on atheism are so famous, they deserve their very own article!
 * The best way to defend free speech is to attack protesters who don't want to give an anti semite a speaking platform.
 * Jenkins manages to flood the Recent Changes without lifting a finger: This comment led to this sysop edit orgy. UPDATE: the clusterf#&k continues.
 * Barak Obama (sic), "affirmative action African American." UPDATE: MakeTomorrow, our bill is in the mail. You missed the misspelling of Obama's first name, though. Get it together. UPDATE: Someone else was reading along too
 * I'm sure there is a completely rational explanation why Andy is now the only contestant with access to the Judges namespace  you know, other than "I want to make sure that my team wins this time"
 * Damnit  Iduan might be staying  Update: Someone with 1500 less edits tell him to "keep up the good work" that sysopship will come "sooner or later." Five will get you two it's "later".
 * Jimmy added a short list of prominent abolitionists to the slavery article. One of the web sites cited links to in atheism american.html this, citing Elizur Wright, an atheist abolitionist. (Doesn't the CP main page have a note about how Dinesh D'Souza denies that atheists opposed slavery? But I digress.) The edit was deleted, with the comment that it was "copied from a hate site", and Jimmy gets permabanned for it. He was admittedly copying stuff rather than putting it in his own words, but he cited the web pages.
 * Ed Poor is cool now. Yo, street cred!
 * Ed Poor makes a plea for sources and references  that will be a first!
 * You women really need to keep your "berginas" out of the Marines UPDATE: HOLY $H!T, He's defending rapists now
 * It slices, it dices! Christianity was not only the deciding factor to introduce democracy and start off science, it also ended slavery! Coming up next: How Christianity was needed to develop cars and planes!
 * Throwing off the shackles of a tyrannical despot to form a new nation is a conservative ideal? Wha, huh!? Hint, be sure to scroll over for the "liberal" part
 * Andy, when does a massacre become statistically significant? Maybe deaths as a result of massacres need to be 95% of all deaths in a year before they become significant? As an added bonus, Andy explains why all real Conseratives agree with him about everything.
 * Despite Andy himself being an editor of the Harvard Law Review, when Barack was president, it was a liberal rag.
 * Oh noes! Hillary is a bad person because an advisor broke the law. (Don't you want a President of the entire nation who can't even pick a sober campaign advisor? I know I do!) Librul deceit in delaying the release of info too!
 * Some strong points made in this discussion: Opposing the Pope's visit makes you an atheist, communist, or both.
 * Making every reference to gun control a wiki link in your comment makes your point even more valid.
 * Hard to get upload rights? Who says! PhilipRayment proves it is only a matter of who you ask. Or is that who asks for you? Update: the uploaded image tells much.
 * What is Karajou advocating?
 * "Breaking News" 39 years ago....
 * The homosexual counter attack has finally pushed Adolf Hitler from CP's top ten most viewed pages.
 * Isn't this the same guy who said Obama was an affirmative action candidate?.... Let's see: yes, yes,and yes
 * Juno, a movie which makes fun of the pro life movement and glorifies the individual, freely made choice to keep a pregnancy, is apparently somehow still a pro life movie. Thanks, Bethany, for that intriguing misinterpretation. Granted, if the movie started with an abortion, it probably wouldn't have been nearly as interesting without its central plot element.
 * RIP Iduan.
 * Rules, rules, rules. On the one hand, people get a 1 day block for adding a much needed fact tag to Andy's idiotic claim. On the other hand, sysops spell check and wikify or de wikify other people's comments at will.
 * "New user" asks Fox uncomfortable questions about whether BrianCo and an RW member are his socks, with predictable results...
 * TK's triumphant return to Conservapedia will be postponed for at least one more month. Maybe there's hope for accountability after all... UPDATE: The recidivist gets a reminder. Do I hear "Proposition 184", anybody?
 * Have you ever seen someone blocked for 90/10 after one edit?
 * A Tolkien fanboy takes on the Assflynator, and reports him to the Administrative abuse page! We know this can only end one way... how long will this Naz'gul last? UPDATE: blockified!
 * Christians who support the ACLU might not be Christians. We really can't be sure. Same thing goes for Bill Clinton.
 * Who knew that milk could make so many products? Update: Including delicious and nutritious quark!!! Further Update You're welcome, HelpJazz.
 * Sometimes, a single edit would be enough for two or more WIGO entries: Case in point. Liberals almost got Ed's friend killed! They are the "party of death"! And it's a darn shame that we aren't allowed to discriminate against non white people just because we got a "funny feeling" about them.
 * Ed is against mindless copy pasting! Oh noes, how long will it take for Andy to deliver a furious counter attack? ...and why did Ed start designing a copy paste bot...?
 * Many non YECs edit on CP  sure, just like not everybody on CP is against gun control, abortion, homosexuality, or atheism: They're allowed to edit as long as they accept that their point of view is completely incorrect and that they will pretty much rot in Hell for not believing exactly what Andy does.
 * Andy also doesn't like it when evil liberals choose names that imply a certain amount of... well... wisdom. Apparently, the only acceptable liberal names are "DumbAsBread" and "Idiots R Us".
 * Andy doesn't like it when people point out that the precious Journal of American Physicians and Surgeons (magazine of the AAPS, where Andy acts as "general counsel") isn't quite as awesome as he claims it is. Update: Reverted again, followed by a block and user talk page deletion. Update 2: [QUACK QUACK QUACK].
 * Andy himself was the source of the criticism of himself. Wikipedia should give him just the credit he deserves.
 * We don't take kindly to gender equality here. Note that one edit earned a five year block. Update  Iduan undid his block, and apologized
 * The Greeks knew about many things, including modern cities. P.S. There is more than one paradox. P.P.S. the sum is written as products of 2 rather than powers of 2.
 * Computers  not used in business, science, industry or the Arts. Not really used for anything much since 1833 when they were invented.
 * More CP what the fuckery. Assfly and the Trusworthy Conservative Encyclopedia come to the rescue of baby shakers. What's next? Bunny stompers? Update: Sergeant Schultz, the voice of reason. Any bets as to how long his edits to the Assfly's latest cause celebre last? Update: his edits were up there for about one hour, before Aschlafly improved perverted the content. Next up "Digested Baby Syndrome" to be proven a hoax.
 * The FBI's statistics? Meaningless- especially when compared to Maryland Community Newspapers. Update: Local reports inflate figures related to hate crimes, for, uh, some reason....
 * Here's a little gem from DanH about Ed Poor which he reverted almost immediately.
 * We can hardly wait for the final exam in the American Government course - 'a government test without liberal bias'. UPDATE: Here it is in all its splendour!
 * PJR takes on the Assinator!
 * Only problem is, we don't have "Democrats" in Canada. Update: It's gone!
 * The prodigal son gets a big wet kiss from Andy, without un-deleting his talk, thus making sure it remains buried forever.
 * Top Causes of Rejecting Conservativism will soon become a classic, won't it? Update TK makes his first mark this year!
 * Also a bit old, but come hither and read about how "freedom is the enemy of security". (This stayed on the article for almost a month. Andy 'edited' the article, and left it in.)
 * They still don't get it, do they?
 * Another hallmark of Conservapedia, a never ending fear and disgust at the female body.
 * It's always fun to come across some good ol' fashioned Conservative deceit when digging through old gems - lying about his identity yet again, just to score some points. This is here just for shits and giggles, and to remind us of how much of a hypocrite some people can be.
 * According to Andy, if Obama becomes president, it'll only be because of his skin color. Source for this Breaking News piece? None, just Andy's opinion. And oh yeah, Obama is the "least qualified" candidate since, I don't know, Lincoln? Goldwater? Bush? (How about Willkie?)
 * Apparently, a CP editor can't even get its own shit beliefs right. "I mentioned earlier that sins aren't forgivable." Let's ignore: Leviticus 4:20,26,31,35, 5:10,13,16,18, 6:7, 19:21 for some OT authority, and Matthew 16:14,15, 9:5,6, 12:31 for some NT authority. I could list all the verses, but there are 95 passages in the KJV alone. Of particular note is: Mt 6:14 "For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:" (emphasis mine) So, the Bible, the holy inspired word of God, quotes Jesus as directly stating that you are wrong. Maybe you're better than Jesus, and the Bible? Of course, the most damning line comes after: Mt 6:15 "But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." (em)  So, I guess I'll see all you "love the person, hate the sin" people in hell; I'm the athiest on the left. I guess that unfortunately, I won't be able to laugh at you for being so wrong at all, as we will both be rotting in the ground.
 * This "reference" doesn't make much sense. 4.5 what ... kids, million kids? and 100,000 out of how many ... 200,000?  Looks like someone might be skewing the facts to make their point valid.  Also how many teachers vs how many priests are responsible for all these abuse cases?
 * Oh! If only we'd known this before invading an Islamic country to spread democracy! And he cites a verse of a song to back up his claim of the connection between democracy and Christianity????
 * A plea for a response. Response. And then "reasonableness" to which the now blocked user cannot respond.
 * Now I like pointing out misuses of the word "literally" as much as anyone (and they are frequent), but is this really breaking news, particularly compared to the epic gaffes of GWB?
 * A major medical study shows that autism isn't caused by vaccination, which isn't good for Schlafly as a lawyer for the vaccine hysteria crowd. So, what is his reasoned considered response? "It's flat-out wrong"
 * Another benefit of Conservativism, resistance to addiction, temptation and obesity. Well, that's a relief.  I'm fairly sure Rush Limbaugh would have something to say about that, too...}}
 * Somebody accuses Joaquín Martínez of violating copyright. Andy rushes to the rescue... without realizing that the accusation isn't about an image at all... And, oh yeah Fuck you Thank you Gary Larson!
 * Everyone shuttup, PJR has just proved God exists
 * Unlike Greek democracy, which only allowed the "upper crust" to vote, American democracy let everyone vote. Well, as long as they weren't black. Or female. (Or, until 1856 in some states, landless.) (Or, under the age of 21 until relatively recently, where it stands now as under the age of 18) (Oh, and in some states, as long as you're not an idiot, insane, or convicted felon, or convicted of an "infamous" crime. Wouldn't that make Andy unable to vote?) (Or a Jew in Maryland before 1828.)
 * Does braindead Ed read before he comments? What he's asking for is linked to in the sentence he questions.
 * Time between "warning of deletion if liberal bias isn't removed" and deletion - 3 minutes.
 * Did you know that successful democracy is a result of Christianity? No? Well, then Andy better repeat it a few times
 * More Schlafly maths: How qualified you are depends entirely on how many PhD's you hold, regardless of the field of study. Because the number is more important than the relevance. P.S. The article itself is an irony goldmine.
 * The word "fundamentalism" is a pejorative term used by liberals to denigrate evangelical Christians. That's its only real use. UPDATE! Time to bring some reality to the argument! AND shot down and revived after a certain uncomfortable question was asked. Does this mean rationality on CP? Only time will tell!
 * Because different ideologies are never suppressed at CP, right?
 * 40 hours of work for this piece of shit. Maybe Andy's even more crazy than we think!
 * When jolly "Uncle Ed" starts ranting about "that slutty heathen Britney Spears" and girls potentially not wearing panties at school, I kinda start worrying.
 * How well do sysops know their own site? Not well enough to remember what their logo looks like, it appears!
 * Not exactly topical but are there unpopular acids?
 * Andy really can't accept that there were "prominent Americans" who started their school days without prayer.
 * Word redefinition time!
 * It's sysop handbag time! Update: A quick bucket of whitewash and it never happened! Only a disjointed accusation of alcohol abuse.
 * How to win an argument, by Aschlafly. Pointer #1: When in doubt, make up statistics. (Quasi-)Update: Pointer #2: When challenged, claim that those statistics are "obvious and indisputable statements of fact". Update again: Pointer #3: Declare that it's Liberal Bias to think otherwise.
 * Oh noes! SSchultz puts his head in the lions's mouth.
 * What's this? Is Andy about to give all his money away?
 * "I may have been over the top to call these [[sluts | ladies] 'godless'"] - How Mr. Tactful here ever managed to get a date is beyond me. At least one sysop tries to defend common sense and raise the quality standards on CP, though.
 * Everybody's favorite slogan was replaced by That Other Slogan. :(
 * Ken's chum Freedom777 tries to fasttrack his way to sysop.
 * "There hasn't been a problem of vandalism with the [Intelligent Design entry"] - not terribly surprising, considering that it had been locked for more than nine months...
 * Conservapedia Commandment Number Three "...pages must be family-friendly, clean, concise, and without gossip or foul language"
 * Reverting wandalism isn't easy! Tash tries (and upon seeing that the revert apparently didn't quite work, self-reverts again), and Andy also has issues, but finally does the right thing.
 * Throw down on the Homosexuality talk page! Estimated user lifetime: until Karajou comes back to work after his hourly puppy-strangling break.
 * News Flash: Shots Hurt Kids. When will liberals learn to stop hurting children just to save them from cancer and disease?  Apparently only 3% of a group of people getting a horrifying disease is within the acceptability margin.  I wonder at what percent it is no longer acceptable?  Knowing Andy, it's probably 95%.  Does anyone know what percentage of kids got polio prior to the Salk vaccine?  Less than 3%?  Not worth it.
 * Just replace the name Wikipedia with Conservapedia when you read this. (For the first paragraph, anyway)
 * Ya'll Gather Round, hear. Uncle Andy's gonna analyze what happened in Iowa I for one, can't wait|
 * CP's new featured article: "America's natural presidential party" (Fun fact: Googling for that term with the quotation marks gives seven results (two without the omitted ones): CP and blogs mocking CP. They describe the Republican party as the moderate/center-right party.  Apparently, center is located just to the right of Emperor Palpatine.
 * Well this probably won't last long. Update: Almost an hour - impressive! Update 2: Andy swoops in quicker for the next one.
 * Karajou seems to think that a photo of some buses trumps a government report in absolving Bush of all responsibility with regards to Hurricane Katrina.
 * It's hard to pick just one edit from here. User Jose83 is either a funny sock or a total moron. Update: Seems the sysops over at CP are just now realizing this. Another update: And he's down! Blocked for 6 months (later shortened to 3) after this remark as a "parodist/troll". Then again...
 * It's "invent a rule" time again: Userboxes aren't allowed "until you establish a track record" - but good news for Walker: Permission officially granted.
 * In Andy Country, "Reversion explained" simply means "I did that, so do not touch!" - Seriously, Andy's possessiveness is getting ridiculous.
 * JakeC discovers that Andy is completely unable to discuss content questions like an adult. Update: Sourcing numerous articles that have been fact-tagged for months is not regarded as making "substantive edits"; but after the attack, Andy finally tells us that he doesn't even see the point raised pretty much every other post by Jake or PJR. Moar update: This exchange is priceless, especially since it's followed by a 90/10 1-day block. (JakeC's actual ratio: 155 mainspace out of 234 total = 66% mainspace)
 * Well known liberal Philip J. Rayment tries his hand at last-wordism on the subject of gun-control. Will Andy let stand?
 * Andy makes some improvementss to Archaeopteryx. The talk is fun too. Don't call my hero a liberal even if he supports one of my clearly identified liberal myths. Losing the argument? Beginning to look like a fool? Time for the 90/10 rule block.
 * While in secular, I once heard that a man in a secular pool was arrested for secular nudity. The story was made secular in secular-access television and it attracted a lot of secularity. That's almost how Andy would say it. Andy also misses what the meaning of the word actually is.  It's not "public/public beliefs", it's "non-religious".
 * Like the Dawkins article, "Evangelical atheism" is not officially protected, but at the same time not open to serious editing. Ed Poor lets on that Andy's jibberish about Evangelical atheists is just that by removing this and saying that.
 * Can't think of snarky comment; too busy bashing my head against a wall
 * Help! I'm being repressed!
 * Like people opening the hatches after storm, CP editors slowly realize that they once again have the power to at least try improving articles... Update: Operating word being "try"...
 * Still going on about rottweiler control, Andy Schlafly blames materialism and basic literacy for gun control advocacy.
 * Seriously old ones, but Ed still points at them: "Writing for the enemy" and "Points of view" are quite hilarious if you keep them in mind while reading CP's articles about atheism, evolution, or homosexuality...
 * Andy missed his 100 examples of bias in Wikipedia. Does that mean that Wikipedia is only 94% as biased as he purported it to be?
 * Andy manages to ruin Conservapedia's official New Year's greeting.
 * Andy, in a display of the Elmer Fudd school of discipline, declares Duck Season and threatens to shoot one of his supporters for pointing out some wandalism.
 * Did you know it is impossible to be a "good person" without reading the bible?
 * Did you know it is impossible to be a "good person" without reading the bible?