Sean Hannity



Watching Hannity talk to Ingraham is like watching state TV in a banana republic — but with great production values. How would you like to be in Kabul today, as an American, and you can’t get to the airport? Where are you thinking your life is headed? If you’re one of those family members, I bet you’re not sleeping. … MyPillow.com. That’s where I go. I fall asleep faster, I stay asleep longer. Sean, just one broadcaster to another: if you want to change the subject away from Donald Trump, maybe don't go to footage that is so clearly a metaphor for his administration — just a car crash we can't tear our eyes away from.

"Somebody Call" Sean Hannity is an American right-wing political commentator-turned conspiracy theorist who speaks nothing but God's Honest Truth, you rebel scum. At least one prominent Republican thinks he's nuts.

Basically, you know that loud "happy drunk" type on the barstool next to you who's mostly fun when the game is on but tends to spout vaguely racist gibberish when the TV is off? That one who's fun to drink with but you're pretty certain has the IQ of a brick? Well, imagine giving him a television and radio show where he goes point-counterpoint against and gets to talk over uninteresting comedian Alan Colmes. In 2009 Colmes was dropped from the  Hannity and Colmes  show, and now Hannity has the floor to himself. Now it is titled simply Hannity, and he can spout his non-stop drivel without having an annoying leftie commie to keep him in check.

Hannity occasionally substituted on WABC for fellow literal-super-heavyweight motormouth Rush Limbaugh, doing a few stints as his guest host around the same time he started with Fox News. He was also responsible for inflicting neo-Nazi shitstirrer Hal Turner on the world.

White supremacist
Hannity's background as befriending a white supremacist has been glossed over. Learning from David Duke (R-South Africa), Hannity has distanced himself from former neo-Nazi pal Hal Turner. Amid accusations that Hannity staffers and "fan boys" have been purging the web on a mission to sanitize Hannity's record, even Wikipedia has finally acknowledged Hannity's complicity.

Following the 2008 Presidential elections, Hannity declared an "underground war, guerrilla war against President Obama."

Effusive opinions
Hannity is on record as having spent more than an hour praising the United States as "The greatest, best, most free country on God's earth, ever"; Fareed Zakaria wore a slightly desperate grin throughout. He also has a rather bizarre definition of the word "peace" that appears to have absolutely nothing to do with any acceptable definition on the Internet. Whereas even the usually unreliable Wikipedia calls it "an absence of hostility", Hannity basically likes to think peace means "blowing the shit out of dirty foreigners".

Hannity worked hard in support of the decrees of God-King Dubya, certain that the GOP would be in power forever. Until they weren't. His intense man-crush on Vladimir Putin is way beyond merely strange.

Getting owned on television
In a desperate attempt to further the bias of Fox News, Hannity tried to debate with atheist Dave Silverman on religion and lost miserably. His continuous preaching of religious values seemed illegitimate due to his hostile, frustrated and irrational arguing. When he realized that he was being outclassed and being exposed for the biased moderator he is, he quickly tried to undermine his opponent via personal attacks. He then closed the debate hastily, realizing what little credibility he had as an anchor was being decimated. The debate was met with strong support towards Dave, and with strong criticism toward's Hannity's unprofessionalism and lack of logical reasoning.

Scamming via veteran's "charity"
The Freedom Alliance charity, which claims to raise money for wounded soldiers and survivors of fallen ones, was exposed in early 2010 by hardcore right-wing Ann Coulter wannabe Debbie Schlussel as only using three percent of its proceeds for the stated purpose. (Stopped clock?)

Hannity apparently insists on being flown around in a private jet and having access to a fleet of luxury vehicles for himself and his family on the ground.

World records

 * First ever winner in history of the official "Worst Newscaster of FOX" award. Proceeds to celebrate on Twitter.
 * Use of the word "hate" in a single show: 16,535.
 * Career usage of the word "hate": 3.226x1027.

"Ode to Sean Hannity"
"Ode to Sean Hannity" is a poem written by John Cleese of Monty Python fame. It is an addendum of sorts to the pwning of Hannity at the hands of Obama campaign spokesman Robert Gibbs on the special edition of Hannity & Colmes following the second Presidential debate in 2008. The poem was submitted to Keith Olbermann and was read as part of the number one story on the October 8, 2008 broadcast of Countdown with Keith Olbermann:


 * An Ode to Sean Hannity
 * Aping urbanity
 * Oozing with vanity
 * Plump as a manatee
 * Faking humanity
 * Journalistic calamity
 * Intellectual inanity
 * Fox Noise insanity
 * You're a profanity
 * Hannity

Hillary Clinton
Although he's obviously not a doctor himself, Hannity seems to have armchair diagnosed Hillary Clinton as an epileptic, or at least given to "having seizures" based on two instances of taking a sip of water, causing coughing, one instance of tripping boarding a plane, and a playful bobbing of her head in response to a number of not so serious questions which she then joked about herself. Let's be grateful he's not a qualified doctor — well, acquiring that degree is probably beyond his talents.

Don the Con
Hannity's relationship with Trump dates back to at least 2012 when Hannity advised Trump not to run in the 2012 U.S. presidential election. In 2015, when Trump announced that he was running for president, Hannity and Fox were immediate and enthusiastic supporters, a relationship that has been ongoing. The relationship with Trump was so close that White House aides have said that "he basically has a desk in the place" due to Hannity's frequent phone conversations with Trump in the White House.

Hannity has also voiced frequent and strong support for one of Trump's lawyers, Michael Cohen, who is under criminal investigation as of April 2018. Hannity however did not reveal that Cohen is also Hannity's own lawyer, which Cohen's lawyer was forced to reveal in court. This previously unacknowledged relationship between Hannity and Cohen would be a breach of journalistic ethics, particularly if Hannity were a journalist. Nonetheless, the official word from Fox is that they don't care. As of 2018, Cohen, known mainly as a "fixer" rather than as a practicing lawyer, has only three clients, the third one being Elliott Broidy. Broidy resigned as RNC Finance Chair after it was revealed that Cohen arranged for a $1.6 million settlement with "an ex-Playboy model who said she was impregnated by Broidy." Given that Cohen paid hush money for sexual affairs for two of his three clients, it does raise questions about what the third client hired him for, particularly because of the widespread sexual harassment that has occurred at Fox.