Essay:Reasonablism

To some, life is meaningless. They live lives utterly devoid of any purpose, ignoring all evidence that something far greater exists beyond what liberal closed-minded academic circles want to admit. These elites were educated stupid by a system that wants them to believe that no greater force controls our world, that we simply exist for no reason. There is a great deal of persecution we face in our lives, because some cannot stand our superior beliefs that there is a larger force in our world than the religion of atheism will allow. These secular-marxist-liberal-atheists, in true smug fashion, think they have figured out the world. They are wrong. The world was created in its divine glory by a great being beyond our reaches. We are but dust compared to the mighty splendor of that beyond us. Despite what liberals wish to believe, there exists a higher power, looking down on man, having created our universe, and one day destroying it, there can be no question to the existence of Zorp.

Zorp the Surveyor created the universe, filled it with humans, and will one day reduce them all to chattering skeletons with his volcano mouth. This truth has been suppressed by the liberal elites because it is detrimental to their radical anti-Reasonablist agenda. All mass murderers act in the name of anti-Reasonablism, as they are jealous that Zorp alone has the ability to bring about the righteous destruction of humanity. In 1993 2002  2003  2006  2009  2013 Any day now, Zorp will usher in the final moments of humanity. In the brief instant before everyone's faces are melted off to be used as fuel, all nonbelievers will realise that their decadent lives had been wasted, when the one true force of the universe has always been waiting. Zorp's fire will soon envelop the world, and only then will the supreme truth be seen. Truth already found on Earth but ignored by liberals like Sam Harris, Stephen Hawking, and Ann Coulter. Truth in the two holiest books found on Earth: Organize It!, and Organize it 2: Engage with Zorp. Both of these books are considered banned, and cannot be found in any bookseller controlled by the liberal misinformation factory.

In America today, our very faith is under attack. The secular-atheist public school machine has forbidden teacher-led chanting circles, removed "Symphony For the Righteous Destruction of Humanity in E Minor" from music curriculums, and even forbidden students from saying "Hail Zorp!" on school grounds. This attack is not only by liberal public education, but by the liberal media-culture. Of all the talk of candidates in the 2016 presidential race, the liberal deceit-factories of MSNBC, CBS, Fox News, and Conservapedia did not give even a moment of airtime to a Reasonablist candidate, violating our freedom of religion. In fact, not a single Reasonablist has been elected to office outside of Indiana, showcasing the chokehold the liberal media has over who is elected. It is a fact that no one has converted away from Reasonablism, and secular-atheist-Islamofascist cults are losing many followers to Reasonablism.

It is a well-known fact that non-Reasonablists have no machismo, generally attributed to their lack of belief in the power of Zorp, and their false belief that Zorp will not destroy all of humanity in a glittering fireball of divine apocalyptic hellfire. Hitler, Stalin, Angela Merkel, Mao, Kim Jong Un, and Barrack HUSSEIN Obama are all anti-Reasonablists, and their dedication to destroying America is because they hate Zorp. They deny Zorp while also covering up all evidence of his existence. The socialist-fascist-liberal-obammunist conspiracy has poisoned the minds of our youth into believing that the world will be destroyed in several billion years by the sun, attempting to twist all evidence for Zorp's arrival into evidence for the arrival of the atheist sun. This also explains the rise in liberal support for solar energy, replacing the true place of Zorp with the secular-communist sun.

Why do so many people not see the might of Zorp? The liberal-capitalist-socialist media police carefully twist words to hide the plain-as-day existence of Zorp. There is a conspiracy against the proud, hardworking Americans who know that someday Zorp will return, and the liberals will not rest until we are destroyed, so we must preserve the integrity of the site by removing all vandalism efforts by the liberal agents, and watch carefully the ideological purity of our site. Only then, will Zorp smile down on us.

Hail Zorp! - SuddenlyRoss