User talk:Old guard

And the best part is no more CAPTCHA, apparently. Old guard (talk) 11:48, 3 January 2016 (UTC)
 * Aw man, I'm sorry nobody noticed. Still, welcome back. As for the CAPTCHA, there has apparently been some problems with that lately, but you should have gotten it; well, until just now when I autopatrolled you. ScepticWombat (talk) 12:07, 3 January 2016 (UTC)
 * Thanks. Man, it's weird that the only username I seem to actually know or recognize here is Weaseloid. Probably a good thing, though. I want a clean, minty-fresh start after an absence stretching frickin' years! Old guard (talk) 12:16, 3 January 2016 (UTC)
 * Welcome, stranger. I'm trying to figure out who you could be.   12:21, 3 January 2016 (UTC)
 * I am an editor here just like everyone else and that is my primary role. Old guard (talk) 12:24, 3 January 2016 (UTC)
 * I have enjoyed your (recent) posts. Interesting to see the perspectives of a member from the dim and distant past :) --TheroadtoWiganPier (talk) 12:53, 3 January 2016 (UTC)
 * Well thank you. I look forward to not being so dim or distant in the future. Old guard (talk) 01:54, 5 January 2016 (UTC)

Hmm
Bugler? Bicycle wheel  20:16, 3 January 2016 (UTC)
 * I'd like to give it away, but I'd have no way of proving who I used to be outside of asserting it, and I want to distance myself from some of my antics anyways because, looking back on them, some of them were not a reflection of what I strive to be these days. Old guard (talk) 20:27, 3 January 2016 (UTC)
 * OK. Bicycle  wheel Toxic mowse.gif 20:33, 3 January 2016 (UTC)
 * If you can email me, I'd be privately satisfied in my curiosity. If you don't, I won't mind.  ħ uman [[Image:human sig talk.gif|link=User talk:Human|User talk:Human]] 03:47, 6 January 2016 (UTC)
 * I suppose I'll email you, even though you should already know that I am Helena Bonham Carter. Old guard (talk) 03:55, 6 January 2016 (UTC)

Bots? lol
You must mistaken believe we live in 2010. Most have broken down long ago and no one has access to them any more so we can't fix it. I dare not write a new talk page archive bot for fear of pibot magically coming back and fucking it all up. Carpetsmoker (talk) 04:01, 5 January 2016 (UTC)
 * Pibot doesn't work? Old guard (talk) 04:08, 5 January 2016 (UTC)
 * not every often, if at all. --TheroadtoWiganPier (talk) 04:11, 5 January 2016 (UTC)
 * I see (it hasn't worked since November). I also see Pi is not very active. Too bad, I don't know who else has bot server access (if you e-mail Trent, he'll get back to you in 2 years). If I were more technically inclined, I'd probably just programme a new one at this point. Old guard (talk) 04:16, 5 January 2016 (UTC)

Sysop
In what can only be described as a loss of sanity you vaguely requested to become a sysop. Well it turns out I was listening so sucked in loser, you've been demoted. The guide is here, and might be worth reading even if you are an "Old Guard" as it may have changed slightly since 2011. Also I'm going to block you; gird your loins and prepare for block war. Tielec01 (talk) 03:43, 8 January 2016 (UTC)
 * Drat, I've been demoted again! Oh well, I'm sure there's a mess around here somewhere to be swept up. Old guard (talk) 03:44, 8 January 2016 (UTC)

"While the Old Guard in me says"
The old guard of the old guard? Is it recursive? 02:02, 15 January 2016 (UTC)
 * Damn kid, get off my Wiki! I'm waiting for my new Hoveround to arrive so I can go to the pharmacy, pick up my medicine,and get back to the WikiNursingHome in time for supper. Tonight's my favorite: mashed potatoes and strained peas. Mmm. Speaking of favorites, did you happen to see the my favorite comic strip in the newspaper has been out of print for some years now? I just learned the other day that they don't make Li'l Abner comics anymore. That makes me sad. I miss the good ol' days. Anyways, thanks for stopping by to visit me, young man. It's so nice to have visitors now and then, because it can get lonely here. We'll see you again another day, Jasper (that was what you said your name was, wasn't it?) Old guard (talk) 02:51, 15 January 2016 (UTC)
 * *doesn't make eye contact, exits quietly* 03:03, 15 January 2016 (UTC)
 * Come back here, young man. I don't think we've met yet, and I'm lookin' for someone to play checkers with..... Old guard (talk) 03:17, 15 January 2016 (UTC)

From one old-timer to another...
...not sure who you are -- have my suspicions, but nothing firm. But glad you're back. Unless you were a jerk. If that's the case, eff you, and things were better without you. Peace. AgingHippie (talk) 04:52, 22 January 2016 (UTC)
 * Thanks. P-Foster, right? I wasn't a jerk way back when, but some of my old antics in relation to Conservapedia are things that, nowadays,  I find immature. As such, I don't want anything to do with my old account and would prefer a clean slate. Old guard (talk) 00:24, 23 January 2016 (UTC)