Conservapedia:What is going on at CP?/May 2011

May 2011
Muphry's law as exemplified by 🇰🇪: " The only thing worse than a unmerited criticism is a unmerited criticism that is not well written." Add "loophole" to the list of concepts too difficult for Andy to understand. User: Why are the various (ahem) 'articles' on PZ Myers locked? They haven't been vandalised... Andy: Hmmm, I don't know why. Would you like to edit them? 🇰🇪: Why don't you ask PZ Myers why he's so fat! Andy's exams just got even easier: post your answers here! (Feel free to check what everyone else has written before you do)  251 pixels : just right. Found a shrimp fossil on land? "Doctor" Hurlbut thinks that can only be due to the Flood. And "Professor" Schlafly concurs with an argument by assertion. UPDATE! One doesn't have to be a Conservapedia fan to enjoy this train wreck.  Say it aint so, is Conservapedia supporting Vandalism/Trolling? Quick, call the FBI! Andy: One day, TV will be gone and all that will remain is Conservapedia Add "socialism" and "fascism" to the list of things Karajou doesn't understand. Countless hordes of long-gone parodists the world over feel a tingly sensation in their loins, as Andy reverses the legacy of the late TK and re-opens his blog to the world. Karajou: Those stupid scientists at the NSF are justifying wasting money on antipodean Jell-O wrestling! Karajou's source: Not only did the NSF fire the people responsible for the wrestling, it did not even pay for the Jell-O.

Reginout: The Trusworthy Spyware You're traveling through another dimension, a dimension not only of sight and sound but of Andy's mind; a journey into a mysterious land where The Office and The Six Million Dollar Man are among the Greatest Conservative TV Shows. That's the signpost up ahead — your next stop, the Twilight Zone. UPDATE: Star Trek, a program where Earth has given up all national borders, united under a communist world government and eventually became one of the three founding worlds of the United Federation of Planets, giving up even planetary sovereignty and any last vestiges of capitalism is a Conservative show. Andy: What? A man with 39 years of public service as the mayor of Chicago, Cook County State's Attorney, and Illinois state senator gets a job at the University of Chicago (an infamously liberal institution for permitting that nobody, Obama, to call himself a "professor") teaching public policy? Must be cronyism!

Spain: Socialists lost 7%, "Conservatives" win 2% in regional elections JPatt: Teabaggers in da house! Andy: Assuming that radioactive decay rates have been constant since time began is illogical! Andy 14 minutes later: [http://conservapedia.com/index.php?title=Counterexamples_to_Evolution&diff=prev&oldid=870955 The extinction rate is implausibly high. Therefore, extrapolating backwards...] <votecp poll=wigo4223 closed="yes">Marco Rubio doesn't fit CP's definition of a natural-born citizen? Say it ain't so! Andy: Don't say it. <votecp poll=wigo4222 closed="yes">Yeah, what kinda idiot ranks a candidate so high before they decide not to run (Trump #3), or when they haven't announced they're running (Bachmann, new #3), or even worse, was never even in the race (Bush, #4)?! <votecp poll=wigo4221 closed="yes">Garbage In, Garbage Out

<votecp poll=wigo4220 closed="yes">George W Bush? Not a conservative. <votecp poll=wigo4219 closed="yes">Andy on May 8th: 'Christian' is "a diluted term preferred more by atheists". Andy on May 18th: "In response to Jcw, I think it is because of the smaller devoutly Christian population in England that there is a less militant anti-Christian group. But the anti-Christian group would "bare its teeth" and snarl as soon as it felt the Christians were making gains." <votecp poll=wigo4218 closed="yes">Breaking news from the future! Newt Gingrich has dropped out of the 2012 Presidential Race!

<votecp poll=wigo4217 closed="yes">Andy abuses set notation to deny gays the right to marry... in a mathematical article.

<votecp poll=wigo4216 closed="yes">Conservapedia discovers the location of "La-la land"! Who's the master parodist that managed to sneak this gem in? Oh. <votecp poll=wigo4215 closed="yes">JPatt tries to out-crazy Ken. He's definitely a close contender.

<votecp poll=wigo4214 closed="yes">If you've ever criticized a Republican you can't possibly be a conservative. <votecp poll=wigo4213 closed="yes">If you've ever won a Pulitzer prize you can't possibly be a conservative. <votecp poll=wigo4212 closed="yes">Andy: George Will is an idiot because he doesn't read Conservapedia. <votecp poll=wigo4211 closed="yes">Andy: Liberals are promoting Princess Diana conspiracy theories!...Andy 11 hours later: Liberals are censoring Princess Diana conspiracy theories! <votecp poll=wigo4210 closed="yes"> God may not be omniscient, or, Andy might not know what that word means. <votecp poll=wigo4209 closed="yes"> Give it up Liberals, ANOTHER senator decides not to run for reelection quits. You don't see Conservatives quitting, do you? <votecp poll=wigo4208 closed="yes"> Yes, Terry, children see the world as being designed. They also see Santa Claus as being real.

<votecp poll=wigo4206 closed="yes">In more Proof that Creationists have no idea what they're even arguing against, Ken deletes references to 450 million year old Starfish fossils While retaining mention of them being related to 2 different Classes of Animal

<votecp poll=wigo4205 closed="yes">"I typically do not listen to much radio. Conservapedia provides far more substantive information that [ sic radio or television can."] Sometimes these WIGOs just write themselves. <votecp poll=wigo4204 closed="yes">Conservapedia's guide to love: Does she have a great personality? Check. Does her smile light up your world? Check. Does simply being around her make you forget about everything else in the world and give you the kind of feeling no other person ever could? Check. Does she support state regulation of greenhouse gases? Dump the bitch! <votecp poll=wigo4203 closed="yes">Andy: The ratings for potential Republican Presidential candidate and birther Donald Trump's The Apprentice are down; therefore liberals watch too much TV.

<votecp poll=wigo4202 closed="yes">Andy sez: Obama can't win without Florida, Nevada, North Carolina and Colorado. Florida=29 votes; Nevada=6; NC=15; CO=9; total=59. If the GOP win all those and nothing else, they get 232 votes; Obama would be on 306. So once again, CP fails at basic math. <votecp poll=wigo4201 closed="yes">Breaking news: whodathunkit? RobS unblocks Human, of all people. Can he get the 403 block fixed, though? <votecp poll=wigo4200 closed="yes">Andy: I bet newspapers prefer "Christian" to "Christ" (because they can totally be used interchangeably). It's a diluted term preferred more by atheists. Well, guess who's a secret atheist? 1 23 <votecp poll=wigo4199 closed="yes">A huge flood is threatening people and property all along the length of the Mississippi River, but Andy is more concerned with how the media "downplays" the term "flood". This is despite there being 11 uses of the word in his source, ten in Reuters' story, eight in the atheistic BBC's story, etc. UPDATE: User: "Every single news article on the floods that I have seen uses the term 'flood' or some derivative of it." Andy: You're wrong! User: I can't tell - are you joking? MOAR!: Andy: [http://www.conservapedia.com/index.php?title=Talk:Main_Page&diff=prev&oldid=867340 Blah blah blah... secularized language] EricAlstrom: Seriously?? <votecp poll=wigo4198 closed="yes">[http://www.conservapedia.com/index.php?title=Talk:Main_Page&curid=111280&diff=867250&oldid=867249 "Allah" is an English term distinct from "God" or "god". There is nothing to translate term "Allah" to in English; it is English.] <votecp poll=wigo4197 closed="yes">Rob: : Because Islam denies the divinity of Christ, their God is not the same as the "Judeo-Christian God". Nice. Pssst. Don't tell the Jews! <votecp poll=wigo4196 closed="yes">Still bent up about Superman renouncing his American citizenship, Rob Smith declares "Superman was born near Smallville, Kansas." ... As long as one disregards the original storyline.

<votecp poll=wigo4195 closed="yes">RationalWikians have a meltdown as they find themselves agreeing with The Swabbie.

<votecp poll=wigo4194 closed="yes">Two for the price of one. Andy fails at translation and at English. And a Deather bonus! Also note that this latest MPR item escalates the theory from "Obama is tricking everyone" to "the media's helping out!" <votecp poll=wigo4193 closed="yes">Andy: Look everyone I'm not the only crazy one! Nearly a quarter of Americans continue to have doubts about whether Obama was born here... Oh, I mean one year ago, before the release of his long-form birth certificate, which has since fallen to 10%. Typical Assfly. <votecp poll=wigo4192 closed="yes">The revolution is spreading! Following Karajou and Iduan breaking with the CP line on Osama bin Laden, a new user comments that Andy and 🇰🇪 "seem to have little regard for truth, and only want to make all Christians look good and all liberals look bad." Instead of reverting, oversighting and banning, Joaquin steps up to agree! UPDATE: "Librulz are allz a bunch of fat bastards!   Hic!", retorts Ken. <votecp poll=wigo4191 closed="yes">D.C. Comics consider revisiting their latest marketing ploy. For everybody's favourite swabbie this translates as, "Librulls dumb! Hur-hur-hur." Update Apparently,  was invited to the bris.

<votecp poll=wigo4190 closed="yes">Thanks to JPratt's illiteracy, even CP admits that Utah's immigration reforms are illegal. <votecp poll=wigo4189 closed="yes">WAAAAAGH!!!  The Kingdom is crumbling! My henchmen are turning on me!  Et tu Brute!   WAAAUGHGHHGH! <votecp poll=wigo4188 closed="yes">Uh-oh, JacobB is attempting to vandalize CP with relativistic science. <votecp poll=wigo4187 closed="yes">"Wikipedia was at one point so partisan" that "right wing people created 'Conservapedia.'" ''"Right wing people"??? The term is "wingnut".'' <votecp poll=wigo4186 closed="yes">If there's one thing that Andy absolutely won't accept, it's hearsay testimony by a terrified woman about whether a charismatic cult leader is alive or dead. <votecp poll=wigo4185 closed="yes">Lenski 2.0?

<votecp poll=wigo4184 closed="yes">Coming as a surprise to no one, Andy doesn't understand probability or DNA testing <votecp poll=wigo4183 closed="yes">*Sigh*. We all knew this was coming... Andy: Where's the death certificate? <votecp poll=wigo4182 closed="yes">Selective blindness from Andy as he declares that Obama's speech contains 'many self-serving references to "me", "my" and "I"'. Word counts are "Me": 2; "My": 3; "I": 10, but how about "We": 40; "Us": 7 and "American people": 6? What about the rich irony in both bitching about Obama not giving credit to Bush in that same speech and then taking an implicit swipe at Obama's execution of the military operation while failing to even mention his name in a post headlined in bold: Bin Laden dead. Scumbags. <votecp poll=wigo4181 closed="yes">Bin Laden is dead! In other news: Rob takes four whole edits to communicate a three-word statement. Update: He takes another three edits to communicate utter bullshit. <votecp poll=wigo4180 closed="yes">Well, at least he didn't call us fat.

<votecp poll=wigo4179 closed="yes">Andy: "Evolutionists are deliberately ignorant because they refuse to admit that the existence of whales disproves evolution." SamRich: "Well actually, the evolutionary history of whales is pretty well understood." Andy: "A link disputing one of the many examples of my deliberate ignorance has no place in my article about deliberate ignorance!"