Fun talk:Tips for starting a conspiracy

...um, ok, sandbox for a page called Fun: Tips for Starting your Conspiracy. Basic idea here is to parody presentations of conspiracies in the media, and how various conspiracies involve members doing things that are WAY too obvious. Anyone who has tips, please post here. I'm going to put various tv shows, movies, etc, and links to pics that can be used below:

Masters of Horror: The Washingtonians: They needed to get back a letter revealing George Washington was a cannibal. So, they came to the suburb house of the guy who had it in the middle of the night and starting hacking at his door with an axe, screaming "Give us the letter!" loud enough to be sure to wake the neighbors...all while dressed as colonials. Not to mention they attacked people with swords on public roads, while riding on horseback. X-Files: When they decided to let Mulder and Scully live, their reasons were stupid. When they decided to kill them, they were way too obvious about it. On at least one occasion they committed a murder on a public road, and just left the body there, while also dumping the still-living Mulder on the highway, after they'd kidnapped him. Babylon 5: There's an episode where Psi Corp announce (very casually) that they created a drug to give people psychic powers and kept it top secret...while walking through a hanger bay full of people.

An example of a non-subtle conspiracy:

http://media.monstersandcritics.com/articles/1357568/article_images/wash2.jpg --Mustex (talk) 01:41, 5 April 2010 (UTC)

Of course, real-life conspiracy theories could be incorporated into this. For example, the signs on the dollar, and other such obvious hints that conspiracies that have existed for centuries supposedly left.--Mustex (talk) 01:41, 5 April 2010 (UTC)

Start small, work up to insanity
A good conspiracy has to start with something more or less believable, then as the reader reads more it can get crazier and crazier. For example an Obama one:
 * Obama was possibly born in Kenya.
 * Obama birth certificate is being concealed from the public.
 * his Kenyan grandmother was silenced to hide the truth
 * his Filipino step-father is a secret cult member
 * Kenya has many cults and is partly Muslim
 * he attended a Muslim school
 * he is likely Muslim
 * he has been to Denver airport many times
 * Denver airport is a secret base of FEMA, military and perhaps aliens
 * Obama is a Muslim, born in Kenya, who is plotting USA overthrow aided by the reptilian overlords under Denver airport.

see how easy that is - stay clear of Denver airport or you will be eaten. 67.72.98.45 (talk) 03:22, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
 * Um, this isn't tips for starting a conspiracy THEORY, but for starting and actual CONSPIRACY. For instance, if you wanted to start a secret society dedicated to putting a Lawn Gnome in the White House, this would be the article to help you get started (still, start small is a good idea, just wanted ot make sure that was clear).--Mustex (talk) 05:40, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
 * The conspiracy worked. Anna Livia (talk) 10:31, 1 March 2018 (UTC)

on evidence
Another student in grad school did a project on conspiracy theorists. I, in a half-assed sort of way, am trying to track down that project. I doubt I'll find it or the grad student. One of the interesting things she uncovered was the relationship to evidence. Conspiracy theorists think that they have some sort of special relationship to evidence. They see it and conventional wisdom does not. Evidence that "sheeple" buy into is obviously fake whereas various sorts of quackery are obviously compelling, true and over ride plebeian views of the topic. This I think is a central pillar of conspiracy theories-special and whacky "evidence." Good examples of this is the idea of Obama's "long form" birth certificate,the significance of the "Hockey stick graph" to climate change deniers, and the flag waving  in the moon landing films. If the topic of this article is going to be starting conspiracy theories then debunking "real" evidence and manufacturing whackadoodle evidence should be a prominent feature.Me!Sheesh! Mine! 03:32, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
 * I always like the way that conspiracy theorists tend to say things like "according to the official version" - with the unstated implication the the "official version" is always hiding something. --BobSpring is sprung! 19:10, 5 April 2010 (UTC)

To Clarify My Purpose
Just wanted to make this clear: This is NOT on the topic of creating conspiracy THEORIES, but rather of creating CONSPIRACIES. The basic joke is supposed to be that conspiracies (both on tv and, in many cases, in actual conspiracy theories) do things that make absolutely no sense. The purpose of this list would be to give advice to those conspiracies on how to more efficiently run their conspiracy, so that they manage to actually accomplish something meaningful, and conspiracy nuts don't know about them.--Mustex (talk) 06:28, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
 * Some content on your part showing us the way would be more than useful. Since I have no fucking idea what you mean, yet.  07:09, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
 * For example, don't leave clues to your existance on everyone's money, don't eliminate people who know about you in public areas (especially when everyone thinks they're crazy), etc.--Mustex (talk) 14:43, 5 April 2010 (UTC)

Conspiracy and conspiracy theory
There may be some confusion about the difference between the concepts of: "conspiracy", "theory about a conspiracy" and "conspiracy theory".

A conspiracy is a real secret attempt to make something happen. Secretly plotting to overthrow the government would be a conspiracy. Plotting a terrorist attack would involve a conspiracy.

Whenever the police arrest terrorists who are about to carry out an attack they presumably had a theory about a conspiracy before they began their investigations.

A conspiracy theory is usually used to mean some wacky idea which ties together a series of unconnected facts and imaginary facts in such a way that "it all fits" to prove that the Martians have landed or whatever. (Frequently conspiracy theories are constructed around traumatic events possibly becasue they help people to give meaning to such events.)

Reading Mustex's comments in the SB it looked like he was after a "conspiracy theory", reading his comments here it looks like he's more after a real conspiracy. So I'm confused.--BobSpring is sprung! 09:38, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
 * Well, this is going to be fictional, so I wouldn't say "real," but I mean a "conspiracy" NOT a "conspiracy theory." The premise of the joke is that conspiracies (both in fiction, and in some real-life theories) frequently do things that make no sense, and thus we should give them "advice."--Mustex (talk) 18:36, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
 * I'm mostly adding serious shit, I hope others (and perhaps me too) will flesh them out with hi-larious examples from well-known movies & TV. 02:37, 8 April 2010 (UTC)

Rules
Ok, these are the first three rules I've come up with (may need rewording, but I want to give you the idea):

1) Keep secret activities secret (spoofing tendency in fiction for conspiracies to do things very publically, like the Washingtonians above).

2) Don't stroke your own ego with hints, it'll mean more people you have to eliminate (spoofing ideas like conspiracies leaving secret codes in our money).

3) Be consistent in your goals (this ties into the way alot of conspiracy theorists use post-hoc reasons to say "X, therefore I was right" or "Not X, therefore I was right." The idea is that conspiracies are wishy-washy in their goals, and can't decide what they really want)--Mustex (talk) 14:49, 5 April 2010 (UTC)


 * That's funny, I think I just added stuff about all three of those before reading this. 02:38, 8 April 2010 (UTC)

let's move this
it's got some momentum and a little meat, might as well relocate it to fun:tips for starting a conspiracy now. 02:35, 8 April 2010 (UTC)

Another necessary point
Have a motive that other people are likely to be interested in/wish to oppose or re-purpose. Almost nobody cares whether Harold Godwinson survived the Battle of Hastings, or which character on the Bayeaux Tapestry (and most of us use emails rather than 'an alternative postal system'). Anna Livia (talk) 10:40, 1 March 2018 (UTC)