Essay:A stock answer to the question of "Why haven't you guys done this yet?"

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To the people who have never participated in a wiki project, the things that go on behind the scenes here are unfathomable. How does this place even exist? How did all these articles come to be? Was it magic? Well, obviously they have seen the articles, and thus they must know, deep down, that we exist; that somebody, somewhere, had to write all the glorious crap that fills up our mainspace. And yet, the idea that we are mere mortals bashing away at keyboards doesn't seem to cross their minds when they ask the question:

Why don't you guys have an article on [insert topic we do not have an article about]? I'm surprised that you wouldn't cover [insert topic we do not have an article about]... after all, that's what this place does, right?

Well, my friend, it's quite simple: It's because YOU haven't written it yet!

I WANT YOU - TO WRITE ARTICLES FOR RATIONALWIKI!

Woah, hold on... me?![edit]

Yes, yes you, dear reader. After all, YOU are the one who wants this article to get written, right? And since you are already interested in learning about the topic, YOU are the best suited to collect and evaluate sources, which you will then distil into a cover worthy article full of knowledge and shitty in-jokes no one will get!

But... I can't. I don't have the spare time...[edit]

A common reaction. However, since I have revealed to you the big secret (that RationalWiki editors are ACTUALLY HUMAN *GASP* WTF?! B#tch, I Can't Even...) you will now realise that "not having enough spare time" is a problem our editors also have. They too, are only human. They have jobs to get to, homework that needs doing, diapers that require changing. They have food they need to consume, shirts in need of ironing, drug fuelled parties they are meant be at. The fact that ANYTHING at all gets done here is a minor miracle in and of it self.

RatWiki editors don't have any more spare time than you, reader. They are just as busy, maybe even busier. But in those moments of peace they occasionally find themselves in, they will log on and make sure that nobody inserted fifty pages worth of the word "penis" into the mainspace. They log on for an hour, or five minutes once a day, or once a week, or once a month, whatever. The main thing is that they are here, helping with the project. All those minutes donated are multiplied by the number of active editors we have here. Their desire to help each other is the only thing that keeps us going.

You could do that too, my friend. But if you really are that busy, then maybe you will be able to relate to the people who didn't have time to write your desired article.

Ah, jeez, fine! Maybe I do have some spare time... but what does it matter? I'm not smart, or funny, or good at writing.[edit]

Cats don't feel reluctant about editing this website, so neither should you.

And?

There seems to be a bit of a misconception amongst the readers I have encountered that we are all really special. I can assure you that this is not the case. (Well, some might call us pretty "special" alright, but not in a positive way...) As I have just explained to you, this is a collaborative project. A lot of our finest articles are not the works of lone editors - they were written by a team of people, all adding their specific skills to the mix. Often it isn't planned that way. Someone will start an article, and it will sit around as a two sentence stub for months, before someone comes along and inserts some dumb quote they found funny. A third editor will stroll by, adding a reference. Another will come along, booting the reference and putting in a better one, loudly complaining about the people who think Twitter is the repository of all human knowledge.

Repeat the above scenario a few times, and hey, what do you know? The resulting thing is actually pretty decent. Something that no one can really claim credit for, but something that everyone can take pride in. If there IS anything special about us (and there really isn't) it's our ability to shitpost on the internet as a unit. Since you are capable of understanding English and you know how to use a computer, I think you are up to the task.

Ah, look, really, I can't.[edit]

Ah, well then I guess your desired article won't get written, will it?

What? Boo! You're a big meanie.[edit]

I'm not saying that to be mean. It's just true. You know it's true too. We don't have infinite time. We are not geniuses. We are a small group of nobodies on the internet who happen to have a weird hobby. We are not experts in every field you have an interest in, nor are we trained to explain every complex idea in a funny, digestible manner.

Or, well, I'M not, dear reader. Maybe those who edited this place before me were. The people who grew up and were whisked away by real life. The people who left in a fit of anger and rage. The people who passed away. All the people who edited this website a long time ago but don't any longer - I am not like them. I don't have their skills or their wit. I don't have that bit of magic built into my keyboard. But I edit this place for those who don't even know of my existence, because others did it for me. When I was just a reader like you, these people were here, making sure that the articles I laughed at were free of typos and vandalism. They didn't even know I existed, and knew they were never going to meet me, but they cared. They cared; right up until they stopped caring. You see, all the people who edit this place, they will leave one day. It's inevitable. They will grow old, and get jobs and have families. They will get tired of the bickering and pointless arguments. They will die. This is true for all us here. We can only hope, that after we leave and lay down our mops that someone will be here to pick them up and carry on. The readers whom we haven't met, who don't know of our existence. Maybe they will care enough to log on, even for five minutes, and help this project we cared about.

I don't know who you are. Probably just some oddball, lurking on the internet. I don't know how smart, or funny, or handsome you are. But I do know that you are cut out for this place. I know that you are good enough to help out around here. And if you choose not to, that's cool. But just remember that things only get done around here because somebody goes ahead and does them. And if you aren't going to do them, then...

...who the fuck is?