Essay:Old Moore's Almanack

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Old Moore's Almanack is an annual book of absolute tripe, apparently dating back to 1697. Although mainly full of adverts for the kind of New Age crap that make you despair for human reason, it is most famous for its astrology-based predictions for the year ahead, covering mainly British politics and horse racing. This essay lists its main predictions for 2020, and over time we can update it with what actually happened.

January[edit]

Note: Old Moore's predictions in bold, our comments in plain.'

  • The new year begins in an optimistic mood. Figures for economic growth are good with high levels of start ups.
  • This is a moment of intense change in the creative industries, with a high chance of controversy.
    • Yes, well, artists and advertisers thrive on controversy, this is like predicting it's going to rain.
  • This is a moment of extreme tension for the UK, with a high risk of moves to break up the union. It could also mark a period of instability in Northern Ireland with incidents of violence increasingly likely.
    • Mate, as I write 2020 is still six weeks away and this is already f####ing happening. Predict something we don't already know.
  • ...a continuing air of crisis... an equally powerful desire to resolve conflicts.
  • ...Markets remain in a state of uncertainty, with constant hope of a boom and fears of a bust, but with no resolution.
  • Volcanic activity is likely around the Pacific Rim.
    • Rain is likely under storm cloud this year.
  • At the New year meeting at Cheltenham a second favourite should triumph. a 10-year-old horse may win this year's Clarence House Chase.

February[edit]

  • Foreign policy is at the top of the agenda, with espionage scandals rocking governments. This is illustrated with a hilariously dated cartoon of two guys in dark glasses and raincoats meeting under a street light like they're in a film noir. The country is on high alert agains conspiracies and subversion.
  • The best financial course is caution and scrupulous honesty is recommended.
  • The USA is beginning the year in a buoyant mood although completely opposing groups are equally confident of winning the Presidential election which now dominates the airwaves.
    • You don't say!
  • Fisheries policy and quotas will be a sourse of confusion and there will be global concern about falling fish stocks and the sustainability of the oceans leading to the renegotiation of controversial agreements.
    • Whoa, did you lose the comma button on your keyboard?
  • Mounting debts in the health service prompt emergency government funding.
  • China is now in a six-month period of popular discontent and government attempts to stifle dissent by controlling the internet will fail.
  • A 7-year-old carrying 11st 1lb may win the Newbury Betfair Hurdle, while a 6-year-old may win at Ascot's Betfair Chase.

March[edit]

  • There is general confusion in foreign policy and ideals regarding Britain's place in the world will result in disillusion.
  • There could be demands to reform the electoral system, including lowering the voting age.
  • New trade agreements will focus on entertainment and luxury items.
  • Northern Ireland enters a period of crisis as a campaign for reunification with the Irish Republic gets into gear, but there is no easy solution. There is a high risk the Good Friday peace agreement will begin to unravel and that the Troubles will return.
  • In the USA, there is a strong possibility of civil disorder.
  • ...a sense of democratic renewal.
  • ...trade wars and bitter international disputes.
  • Latin America experiences disruptive pressures and Colombia and Venezuela may undergo short-lived public protests. Brazil is in a period of prolonged public unrest and hope for change lasting until the end of the year.
  • Sandown's Imperial Cup could be won by a 4-year-old carrying 10st 8lb. The Cheltenham Gold Cup may go to a 7-year-old outsider this time.

April[edit]

  • The Constitution of the United Kingdom is under threat and this is a key moment for electoral changes and election fever.
  • Financial confusion continues as official policy and business interests diverge.
  • International attention focuses on Russia and substantial mistakes made by its government, which appears to be losing its grip.
  • Revolution is in the air as old ways of doing things come under intense scrutiny. New business models are required, especially in agriculture. New technology will be introduced, boosting crop production.
  • The situation on China is critical, with a maximum chance of public unrest and serious clashes between the need for order and the desire of various regional groups for more freedom. The government will calm matters if it recognises diversity and choice.
  • New borders will be drawn between communities in the Middle East as the region adjusts to the aftermath of the civil war in Syria. Hopes for reconciliation are high.
  • Saudi Arabia is transforming its role to become a global player and may move to shed its conservative image.
  • At the popular Aintree Grand National, an 11-year-old second favourite may win. At the Scottish Grand National, a 9-year-old is the likely winner.

May[edit]

  • We can expect major announcements concerning property taxes, and possibly a long-awaited reform of business rates.
  • ...hopes of a new and better world. This will have a direct impact on the US race to become the Democratic candidate in the forthcoming Presidential election, and there will be scenes of extraordinary enthusiasm.
  • There may be a crisis centred on Florida, and storm warnings issued with a high risk of hurricanes.
  • The best investments are offered by telecommunications, satellite technology, drones and the latest forms of social media. New nodes of transport also provide good profits, including electric cars, and even electric planes.
  • Cuba is experiencing pressure for democratic change although protesters cannot expect quick results.
  • South Africa is also subject to democratic alterations although in the short term hopes will be dashed and there are no signs of a complete change of government in the near future.
  • At Newmarket's 1,000 Guineas Stakes, a surprise outside[r] may finish first. The winner of the 2,000 Guineas Stakes could be ridden by a Irish jockey this year.

June[edit]

  • Key policy debates will concern relationships and the regulation of gender and transgender identities, though without a clear resolution to problems such as the place of transgender people in sport, which continue to be contentious.
  • Tensions in Brazil may reach a height ministers may be prosecuted but problems should be resolved peacefully.
  • North-West Africa is a geopolitical sensitive zone and there will be an international focus on a new financial deal and the development of natural resources in Morocco, Algeria and Mauretania.
  • There will be a reorganisation of roles in the Royal Family, with a high chance that Prince William will be taking on a significant new role.
  • Laws to regulate the health industry are in the pipeline, with scrutiny of controversial new drug treatments and alternative therapies high on the agenda.
  • The Americas are under pressure with a zone of planetary pressure extending south from Washington DC to Colombia, Peru, Bolivia and Chile, and we can expect earthquakes, both political and literal.
  • At this year's Oaks at Epsom, a well-backed favourite is likely to be the victor, whilst a jockey from the north may win the Derby.

July[edit]

  • ...intense constitutional pressures in the UK.
  • Globally, hopes of a bright new future are hit by a planetary reality check and replaced by a mood of business-as-usual.
  • The situation in Northern Ireland becomes untenable...until the end of the year. There is a move for reunification with the south from Republican activists, but the threat of violence from unionist paramilitaries will escalate.
  • The chances of international revolution and conflict are high, and peace-keeping efforts must be intensified.
  • There is a maximum chance of a change of government in India, amongst much bitterness and recrimination.
  • The Russia-Ukraine border is a planetary danger zone...
  • There will be a final opportunity to create a national unity government in Libya, reconciling warring factions and resisting the extremists.
  • A 4-year-old carrying 9st 11lb may win the International Stakes at Ascot, whilst Newmarket's Darley July Cup may be won by a 5-year-old carrying 9st 10lb.

August[edit]

  • the UK's relationship with the EU remains a matter of intense division and will not be resolved for many years.
    • I can't help noting that they haven't made a firm prediction about the biggest issue of the last four years...
  • This is a volatile moment at all levels of existence, favouring single people who embark on crusades, fighting for their principles.
  • Populism will continue to rise, as distrust of traditional politicians and political parties deepens, but there are no boundaries between Left and Right.
  • Share prices and stock markets will be subject to sharp fluctuations amid fears of recession and serious restructuring of essential industries.
  • The celestial mood is proud, optimistic and generous and dominant alignments benefit all creative start-ups. Governments should be providing stimuli, pumping money into the economy.
  • India remains a focus of international concern, and there is a chance of another change of government and shock upsets in politics at state level.
  • We can expect a government reshuffle in Turkey.
  • The King George Stakes at Goodwood may be won by a 4-year-old carrying 9st 3lb. In York's Ebor Handicap, a 5-year-old outsider carrying 8st 7lb may win.

September[edit]

  • Legal reforms will be aimed at reconciliation in managing relationships, reducing conflict and the role of the courts.
  • Global tension remains high, but we may also expect major peace conferences in order to bring warring parties together.
  • Israel is entering a period of greater stability, with welcome results for regional politics and peace talks.
  • Election fever returns to the UK as political instability continues.
  • We can also expect major transport disruption, road closures and train strikes, as well as problems with the internet and possible large-scale hacking attacks.
  • There will be handsome profits for investors in the latest technology.
  • There are also good signs of moderate increases in economic growth.
  • East Africa is a planetary pressure zone, with tensions rising in Uganda, but easing in Kenya.
  • In Doncaster's St Ledger meeting, the winner may have been trained in the south. A 5-year-old carrying 11st may succeed at Ay's Gold Cup.

October[edit]

  • The governing party will lose elections.
  • UK trade and business policy remains uncertain and trade agreements may unravel, costing jobs and investment.
  • There could be moves towards referenda on Irish Unity.
  • Iran is in a period of instability and risks a youth revolt against the Islamic Republic, although the government shows no signs of relinquishing control.
  • Trade wars and economic conflicts continue.
  • The Egyptian government is mired in mystery and is likely to be the centre of a major espionage scandal.
  • Conflicts are likely on the US-Mexican border, stirred up by rhetoric in the US elections.
  • Western countries will be concerned by Russian pressure on the Baltic States.
  • Turkey takes a leading role in the Middle East, cementing its place as a dominant regional power.
  • New uses for old technology may provide the best investment opportunities.
  • The victor at Newmarket's Cesarewitch Heritage Handicap may be a 5-year-old carrying 10st 8lb. Ascot's Queen Elizabeth II stakes may be won by a 3-year-old carrying 9st 9lb.

November[edit]

  • The US Presidential election... a choice with profound long-term change... an atmosphere fraught with conflict which will go to the wire. The inauguration in January next year points to a fresh start and so a change of President.
  • Family values are the focus of public attention, with nostalgia for past certainties a potent political force.
  • The European Union is in a state of potential rebellion as populist parties and newly elected MEPs clash with the European Commission.
  • Legal reforms concern family relationships, divorce and children's rights.
  • Controversy surrounds mining and fracking projects with renewed clashes between companies and protestors. There will be stalemate and neither side will win.
  • There will be ongoing tensions between India and Pakistan but the governments in both countries will steer away from armed conflict and maintain peace.
  • Sri Lanka is ready for a change of government and will also be aiming to turn itself into a high-tech hub.
  • At Haydock's Betfair Chase, a 7-year-old bearing 9st 8lb may prove victorious, whilst at Cheltenham's Bet Victor Gold Cup an 8-year-old carrying 10st may win.

December[edit]

  • The most profitable investments are in the health industry prompted by fears over new drug resistance and the reation of new non-drug treatments.
  • Global economic indicators finally reach a turning point after months of uncertainty, and the dominant trends will be upwards, suggesting that tariffs and trade wars have had a limited impact on the overall picture.
  • The American Midwest is passing through a heightened risk of early winter storms.
  • While international trade relations ease in the short term, the global situation enters a new and volatile phase in which entirely new priorities will take first place. There will be a much higher regard for ideals as opposed to power politics. There will also be a reordering of global alliances, and non-government organisations will be major players. Politicians will have to take note.
  • Better high street sales before Christmas than in recent years could be expected as an internet scandal makes online buyers wary.
  • At Chepstow, the Welsh National may see a 6-year-old carrying 10st 2lb as the winner, whilst in the King George VI stakes at Kempton we could see a 5-year-old romp home. The King George Vi was won by an 8yo, but never mind that, Old Moore missed out on the big news - the race was won by a female jockey for the first time ever. Why didn't the infallible planets pick up on that?