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Conservapedia:What is going on at CP?

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Keep up to date with what is going on at the extremist blog Conservapedia with our rolling reports of the bizarre happenings there. We report; you decide which entries make it to the Best of Conservapedia! If you are contributing for the first time please read the instruction manual. For the older entries, see the archives.

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What is going on?

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October 2020

6Andy takes the Trustworthy Encyclopedia's Main Page Right out into the realms beyond Infowars, screeching about Deep State hospitals, hydroxychloroquine, remdesivir, and inept advisors,img after God-Emperor Trump catches the virus he said "affects virtually nobody."

June 2020

17Andy: Attendance at Trump's Tulsa rally was so poor, because people couldn't take hydroxychloroquine to protect themselves.img These being the same people who refused to wear masks, and were expected to sign a form indemnifying the Trump campaign if they fall ill.
7"What we've got here..." Andy claims Cool Hand Luke for conservatives: "...admires the refusal of a man ... to allow his spirit to be broken, with religious symbolism. This movie glorifies masculinity and portrays the Deep South favorably.img
9CP continues to promote dubious and dangerous hydroxychloroquinone treatment for COVID-19[1]img[2]img despite FDA rescinding its emergency approval and questions about political influence on initial approval.[3][4]

May 2020

5TerryH directs our attention to an adorable article proposing genocide of Palestinians.Here it isimg

April 2020

8 In today's episode of "Conservapedia's left hand, meet the right hand", MPR hails the people trying to disrupt the lockdown as patriot heroes while, over on the covidiotimg article, they are "narcissists who care only about their own gratification and seeking attention and do not care how their self-centered behavior ends up negatively affecting other people or how bad it makes themselves look to the general public". Stalinists on speed, I tell you.
4 Once again, Conservapedia marks the main Christian festival, the focal point of the faith itself, with the same old same old babble. Not one word about the risen Christ and the redemption of mankind. Maybe the MSM is fully covering the resurrection, eh?
4The Hill: Why Africa is at Risk of a Catastrophe (Rural Africans with no access to food or health care are ripe for riots. And with no testing, we have no idea about infections.) Andy's synopsis: See libs? Chloroquine works!img

March 2020

4Andy: Anthony Fauci is “obstructionist”.img Update: Yikes. That's too crazy for Kenimg and Rob (!)img and - holy shit - the reanimated corpse of Ed muthafuckin' Poor!img

February 2020

-3RobS knows a good editor cuts unnecessary words, as in: "In 2020 some guy tweeted that Stern vowed, in 2008, to never vote Democrat again, eight years before he supported Hillary." It's pretty much the same.img (The tweet.)
-2Pokeria1 duz history, faceplants spectacularly: "And don't get me started on Oliver Cromwell, who ... was pretty much the reason why King Henry VIII (!) took a slide into totalitarianism with his trying to have a male heir with his War of the Roses (!!)"img

January 2020

-1Just when Conservapedia seemed to be entering a death spiral of dullness, our very own RobS gives a stunning display of Dunning Kruger syndromeimg. Keep up the good work, Rob. You could be the next Jerome Corsi.
5 Andy is neither weird, obsessive, nor rigid in his thinking. "Setback... for Never-Trumpers!img to Never-Trumpers!img to liberal narrative of "toxic masculinity"!img for vaccine police and Big Pharma!img to pro-aborts!img for conspiracy deniers!img for gun control!img for Dem Establishment!img for communism!img for global warming hoax!img for potheads!img for global warming hoax!img for the liberal media and Nancy Pelosi!img to MeToo movement!img for global warming alarmism!img for Nike's pro-communist globalism!img to Overrated Sports Stars!img for feminists!img for Never Trumpers!img to liberal censorship!img to global warming hoax!img for Darwinists!img for Never Trumpers!img

December 2019

1Conservative values: Andy faps over Eddie Gallagher's manly war crimes and "lovely" wife,img whilst the Saudi regime gets a finger-wagging for the "apparently commanded" Khashoggi killing.img

November 2019

5Pokeria1 says the quiet part out loud: Why not just nuke them out of existence and wipe out Islam, which if you ask me is probably the better strategy knowing that both Shia and Sunni variants are pure evil?img Now with added fascist delusions of grandeur! Once the Communists are destroyed, I'm making sure that in its place is a Christian theocracy...img

October 2019

6Trump, in his great & unmatched wisdom, decides to enrage the jurors in his impending impeachment trial. Blackout drunk on the Kool-Aid, Andy declares victory: Massive setback to neocons and other globalists: Trump is pulling U.S. troops out of Syria.img

September 2019

10 Andy: The Pagan NFLimg shows how little they care about the sport by firing an accused rapist.img

August 2019

28 Andy: Liberals hate chess, because feminists can't explain why all the best players are men.img

July 2019

14Nobs turns the stupid up to 11: Science is little different than reading the past performance of a horse at the race track. It gives you good clues, but can't forecast if the horse is going to twist an ankle today.img

June 2019

23Andy duz law, gets pwned: Accordingly, Plaintiff Andrew Schlafly's Second Amended Complaint with Class Action is DISMISSED, in its entirety, with prejudice.
12Conservapedia attemptsimg to set itself up as a Very Serious Publication and is therefore very truthful. How dare we use humor of any sort in our articles!

May 2019

7"'Lime Green' was named after limes... The Bible doesn't mention anything about lime green."img Thanks, Conservapedia. Fascinating information.

April 2019

6Andy draws the obvious parallel between the Dow Jones and Mainpageleft:img "The strength of this basket of these 30 stocks as an investment tool is in the additional productivity of having multiple approaches to a challenge. Our Mainpageleftimg, with its collection of roughly 135 key entries, illustrates a similar approach to developing helpful insights."
33The recent release of a black hole photograph goes over with Overlord Schlafly about as well as one might expectimg. Using coloration to show infrared is "dishonesty", and his misquoting Stephen Hawking naturally proves his point that his god is more provable than black holes. So, where was that photograph of God again?

March 2019

4Question Evolution is back!img, along with  K e n  D o l l 's claim to be a team of editors!
7 Our very own pet Conservapedian and world class bullshitter writes an article of his usual encylcopedic standard on the Christchurch terrorist attack.img Funny how, despite calling it a left wing attack, his subconscious won't let him call it terrorism.
10According to  K e n  D o l l , atheism is apparently linked to Alzheimer'sConservlogo late april.pngimg. Seriously, how the actual fuck did he come up with this?!

February 2019

16Setback for atheism: Saint Valentine's Day increases in popularity.img Andy sets the bar for parodists even higher.
Article on "Paganism": In modern times, pagan rituals include the Super Bowl, certain public school events, and even misnamed holidays like "President's Day."img
Article on "Demonic": An prominent element of uncertainty, as found in football, seems to enable demonic influences to thrive.img (FSTDT link)
 K e n  D o l l  PRESENTS ...
Everything You Always Wanted to Know About John Wayne's Bowels*
(*But Were Afraid to Ask)
"Gentlemen, John Wayne's bowels were as straight as an arrow. All true conservatives have straight bowels. Did John Wayne coroner's report show any gay bowel syndrome? No autopsy was ever done on "The Duke" because nobody ever challenged the straightness of John Wayne's bowels."img
See also: Inoculation against homosexuality

January 2019

\tfrac{1}{\sqrt{2}} \left ( |0\rangle_A \otimes |1\rangle_B - |1\rangle_A \otimes |0\rangle_B \right )
Several parables in the Bible foreshadow the insight of quantum entanglement about paired photons having opposite spin, by contrasting two men in their relationship with God.img The Prodigal Son contrasts two brothers, two churchgoers are contrasted in Luke 18:9–14, and two brothers are further contrasted in Luke 21:28-31. (FSTDT link)
25 VargasMilan makes irony meters explodeimg everywhere. Surely he is not a deep cover troll?
20Damn. Killer of Davis, CA cop was not a Muslim. But California has legal pot, so that must be it.img
42Conservative surpasses 200,000 editsimg, making him responsible for around 13.6% of all edits on Conservapedia (1,470,640 total).
See also: Conservapedia Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (COCD)
43Increasingly liberal! Andy marches Mormonism out into the parade groundimg, rips offs its epaulettesimg and breaks its sword across his kneeimg.