Difference between revisions of "Conservapedia:What is going on at CP?"

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<votecp poll=wigo2795>Consistency CP style: it's horrendous censorship when a 2 bit sportsman gets dropped after a gay slur, but [http://www.conservapedia.com/index.php?title=Template:Mainpageright&diff=722939&oldid=722862 wonderful news] when a senator gets denied communion for his views</votecp>
 
<votecp poll=wigo2794>TK: Obama is working with the [http://www.conservapedia.com/index.php?title=Template%3AMainpageright&diff=723051&oldid=723033 9/11 terrorists!]</votecp>
 
<votecp poll=wigo2794>TK: Obama is working with the [http://www.conservapedia.com/index.php?title=Template%3AMainpageright&diff=723051&oldid=723033 9/11 terrorists!]</votecp>
 
<votecp poll=wigo2793>The cover-up [http://www.conservapedia.com/index.php?title=Special%3ALog&type=delete&user=TK&page=User%3ABenjaminS%2FTim%27s+Farewell&year=&month=-1 continues].</votecp>
 
<votecp poll=wigo2793>The cover-up [http://www.conservapedia.com/index.php?title=Special%3ALog&type=delete&user=TK&page=User%3ABenjaminS%2FTim%27s+Farewell&year=&month=-1 continues].</votecp>

Revision as of 13:15, 23 November 2009

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Keep up to date with what is going on at the extremist blog Conservapedia with our rolling reports of the strange, contradictory or humorous activity there. We report, you decide which entries make it to the top of Best of Conservapedia by using the red and green arrows to vote the winners up and the stinkers down![1] If you are contributing for the first time please read the instruction manual.


Archives

What is going on?

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Conservapedia
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Introduction
Commentary
In-depth analysis
Fun

Latest

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52Consistency CP style: it's horrendous censorship when a 2 bit sportsman gets dropped after a gay slur, but wonderful newsimg when a senator gets denied communion for his views
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22TK: Obama is working with the 9/11 terrorists!img
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0The cover-up continuesimg.
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76User: Can you clarify your essay on information theory and explain its definitions?img Andy: Fix it yourself.img With a sly crack about the grammar error in the previous post. User: I may hold a PhD in physics, but I've learned not to disagree with you here on relativity, since you'll delete my corrections.img Andy: I am right, if you would just have an open mind.img User: It's sad that you think you know more about science than someone who researches it daily.img Andy: If you love science so much, YOU pay for it!img TK stops the argument.img
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52RobSmith: Why debate, when I can call on Godwin's Law?img
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51Ed Poor, gettin' creepy on the question of young girls' sexuality.img Again.
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51How Jpatt sees himself: "a hardcore conservative contributor despised by liberals."img (Consigning PJR to the waste bin of history in passing)
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5Ken: We're rich!!!!img.

Earlier entries

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31Oh noez! Mattel is celebrating the 50th anniversary with Barbie in traditional Islamic dressimg!! Yea, you are kind of the same people who thinks Barbie is meant to sexualize young girls and rebel against traditional women rolesimg (sic).
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63Consistency, Conservapedia Style: 2008: When Sarah Palin's yahoo email was hacked, and confidential information stolen, CP condemned the hackers, with Jinx pointing out (liberals) have bellowed about privacy rights...when it comes to a Republican...such rights just (fly) out the nearest window.img Then became openly orgasmic when said hacker was caught.img Modern Day: Computer Hackers break into climate change center, stealing confidential items, CP says HA! Look at what this information says.img
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44Clearly JacobB has forgotten which blog wiki he's working onimg. "don't worry about explaining every edit on talks pages or asking if the edit is OK. There are no indiscriminate bans or biting the heads of newcomers here."
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79Bad news for parachute salesmen: faith can physically trump the disorder or chaos of falling.img MOAR ADDITIONAL INSIGHT: Food shortages are inherently disordered!img
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0DerekE to Andy: "Look Boss!img Libburlz are bilking money in Oregon by making up districts! They won't even fix the problem!" Day later, error corrected.
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32JLauttamus gets with the times and makes like a tree.img
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12TK joins the Ed Poor school of editing. "The article wasn't incorrect, but as it wasn't 100% correct, I deleted itimg". Which is, after all, easier than just copy-pasting something like you usually do.
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59MarkGall wants to come back.img Andy: Payback's a bitch!img TK: I want to see you beg for it.img
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13RJJensen, professor of history, quotes as federal lawimg an act that was superseded only five years later. A few minutes later: If you need any more help be sure to stop byimg. He also conveniently forgets to mention the founding fathers didn't include non-free non-whites in that act. The founding fathers hate Obama!
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11Factual information not welcome hereimg.
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28Wired magazine publishes a report showing which states received the most science research grants. User notes that the top receivers are all blue states,img inferring Liberal Bias. Andy copy-pastes the user's remarks to the mainpage.img
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39And another one bites the dust.img
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26Conservapedian science: Anything that cannot be proven true is unfalsifiable.img
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24A study says that Fox News was just as biased against McCain as against Obama, but now gives him worse press than the other news networks. Jpatt: Study says Fox News is fair and balanced! Obama is a liar!img
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38The Senate is delaying a vote on a climate bill. Therefore, lib-burr-ruls will soon be admitting that global warming is a hoax and that the world is 6,000 years old.img
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92The mass exodusimg of the intelligent members continues!
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66The weakly toonsimg get weaker. Although it's good to see the word quimimg appearing on the main page of a family friendly site! Keep up the good work, Karajou. JacobB makes the weakest justification everimg. And Andy approves!img UPDATE And Karajou deletesimg the offending scribble anyway - and forgets to fix "mainpageleft" first, leaving an embarrassing red link at the top of the main pageimg, which Ken manages to delete in a single edit!img
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95Were we wrong? MarkGall makes a standimg and retires.img More: At this critical time, Andy senses the time has come for an inspiring speech.img
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107Free Speech: Andy: "Liberals are censors! Free speech means you can say what you want without retaliation"img. User: ORLY?img Andy: Rly!img
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-6Japanese customs: Showing subservience in Japan is done by kowtowing. Ken's World: Obama's bow is too low, there he is demonstrating that he is a servant to the Japanese emperorimg. Apparently, Ken needs to learn that bowing is a Japanese custom of greeting.
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55When Karajou decides the debate is closed,img the debate is closedimg UPDATE: Karajou backs down and apologises!img
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80Reality: NFL player with a history of problems and a career on the downswing let go after making comments about his coaches and teammates that included homophobic slurs. Andy: NFL player will never play again because he criticized homosexuality!!!!img UPDATE: Less than 9 hours later, reality displays its well-known liberal bias again.
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20And so endsimg the sagaimg of Jamesimg andimg theimg Giantimg Peach Arkimg.
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30Article: The army suckered the media into reporting a false version of events at Fort Hood, maybe because they wanted a white person to be the hero instead of a black person.
Andy interpreting said article: The lib-burr-rul media and the Obama administration deliberately lied to usimg because they "just don't like male heroes."
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-5 New moon hoaximg uncovered by the intrepid investigators at CP. Nasa used nuclear explosions to send astronauts home from the moon. Gives new meaning to strap your ass to a rocket.
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15Koward ain't nobody's foolimg. He knows nobody uses CP for referenceimg.
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-26 Ken is looking rather bullishimg all of a sudden! Ole Ole Ole!
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191NOW WITH MORE AWESOME: KSorenson: Andy, could you cite your incorrect claim?img Andy: Look beyond what you're taught.img KSorenson: Your claim's still incorrect.img Andy: I'm not sucking up to liberal professors. Therefore, my claim is correct. Look at Google. Now once you've realized I'm right, ask why your liberal professors censored this.img KSorenson: Learn to read, Andy.img Andy: Butbutbut margin of error!img KSorenson: I have the data in front of my face.img And another thing.img Andy: Protesting against me too much is unscientific. Why do you care so much?img KSorenson: Because I teach physics. You're unfit to be a teacher.img Andy: Uh ... creationists have been denied tenure!img I'm right! Relativity is a thug that discourages Bible reading!imgAndy continues: Actually, relativity is really a quasi-religionimg, and as a religion "What has it helped achieved?". UPDATE: Expelled - No intelligence allowed.img
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8Rewrite Bring Forth the Best Rendition of a famous Bible verse, add a paragon of creationist misrepresentation, stir, season liberally conservatively with word-salad, and you have made a new Andy Insight!img
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13Andy: Yippee! Canada has excluded women from Olympic ski jumping!img Let's hope they order 'em all back into the kitchen next! (Except for Mommy, of course.)
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17Blasphemy! Europe bans crucifixes in public school classrooms as a welcoming gesture to immigrants atheist censorship measure.img Not having crucifixes will apparently lead to "less charity and more social problems."
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-3User exposesimg someimg liberalimg bias.img Andy winds the psychological projection knob up to 11 and blocks him for "lack of substance."img
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15July 2009: A Cuban baseball player defects from Cuba in order to play in the major leagues. November 2009: Andy concludes from the incident that the lib-burr-rul media are giving the Reds a free pass.img
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-4Legitimate example of liberal spinimg on Wikipedia's article about argumentum ad populum, or just a cry of cowardice?
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47Andy doesn't actually disbelieve in black holes, he just thinks we should pretend they don't exist in order to prop up his social agendaimg.
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19User: Why is there no mention of Obama's Nobel Prize?img Andy: That only belongs on the Nobel Prize page because it says more about the prize than about Obama.img
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84Andy: You can't falsify the theory of general relativity.img MarkGall: Uh, Andy, the whole concept of falsifiability owes its existence to Karl Popper contrasting Einstein's falsifiable theory with unfalsifiable ones.img Andy: Popper's personal views are irrelevant. Physics students resist logic.img
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162Andy: You, like most graduate students, are clueless about the principle of falsifiability.img User: Uh, I studied it for two semesters and "not only are you not right, you're not even wrong" about it.img Andy: Open your mind and accept that I'm right.img Logic does not require so much verbosity.img User: Respectfully, Andy, you're full of crap.img Andy: Professors are liberal and closed-minded.img
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40Andy: Mammals didn't take airplanes to dry land a hundred miles awayimg during the Massive, Undeniable Flooding. Hence, "evolutionists' story of descent" is in big trouble.
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127BMcP: Why do Christians have to create alternatives to Twitter if they are not censored there?img Andy: BMcP, you must support censoring classroom prayer.img
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1It's "buy one, get one free" day again: CP honors Veteran's Day? Not if Jpatt has anything to sayimg about this! And at the same time, he sells a blog post that criticizes the Republican party's leadership and its failure to be a revolutionary party... as evidence that the Republican party is a revolutionary party.
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83Karajou, what the hellimg?
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47Thou shalt not accuse Republican heroesimg of not being homophobic.
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39RJJensen to TK: Read a book.img
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137Karajou just doesn't understand the whole 'burden of proof' thing. "You must scour the area once known as the Kingdom of Urartu and show that Noah's ark didn't exist before you carry on with your opinion in this website."img We are still waiting for the bible-thumpers to disprove the FSM.
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65In the beginning was the Word Truthimg Wordimg Living Wordimg "Concealing Word" of Godimg Utteranceimg orderimg Commandimg perfect orderimg Realization that wiki-based Bible-translation by amateurs is a bad idea, and the Realization was with God, and the Realization was God.
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14One post after trashing Hassan for being Muslim, TK is offended that the liberal media dares accuse Conservatives of trashing Muslims.img Have they ever brought up the religion of a conservative Christian psychopath-shooter?
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13Let the conspiracy theories beginimg
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97Andy: We don't allow anonymous claims of expertise here.img So, stop being anonymous and, recreate your account with your real nameimg. Oh, ok, if you insistimg. It's a trap!img
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59Andy the "lawyer" feels that state law should be trumped by Bible verses.img
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29Unemployment is up because Obama plays the sinful game of billiards.img At least he didn't declare reducing unemployment to be "accomplished".
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5ANDY: It's no problem for you to have multiple accounts with your IPimg
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7But... but... Andy, surely replacingimg "Adultery" and "Fornication" with "sexual immorality" is, you know, more concise. And gOD is apparently for men onlyimg.
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94Don't you know anything?!?! "Mothers milk fed ALL the animals in the ark!img How did the mother produce her milk? Well she drank the milk of another, of course!
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97Andy is a multi-tasker. He can shamelessly promote Xenophobia and still have no regard for facts! The British press mistranslated the story into Liberal. The Fort Hood Shooter said "Allah is great" not "God is Great"!img. The only problem is they mean the exact same thing. Update: JM triesimg to do the right thing. Asskicking in 3... 2... 1... ta-da!img. *Update*. Andy visits JM's talk page to explain why Andy is correct, and English dictionaries and Arabic speakers are wrong (because he says so).img Still more: Arabic speaking Christians are as uncommon as healthy 95 year old smokers.img Yet more: You're damned if you do and damned if you don't.img
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59Andy just couldn't resist talking about school prayer in his economics examimg (question #2).
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130Andy: "I don't think anyone denies that all of the inhabitable earth has been flooded."img
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38The federal government might have been 3% off in its prediction?!!? NOOOO!!!!!img
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-16Don't mention the war!!img
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64User: The 'civilized world' does not equal the USA.img Please don't ban me.img RJJensen: I'm going to assume I'm right.img BTW, this is mine.img Enjoy your banhammer for...um..last-wordism!img Joaquin (Mexican) chirps in: USA= world? Sounds fine to me!img
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67Jinx hi Jinx! single-handedly disproves Evolutionimg with his teeth and faulty logic.
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12An irony meter breaks as Jinx hi Jinx! speedies an article for being a political ad.img
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44Another long week in politics:Chris Christie goes from RINO who does not representimg True Conservatives to the great slayer of Obama's liberal agendaimg. UPDATE: The transformation is completeimg.
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13Every irony meter on the planet shatters as Karajou tells a lesser peon to "issue blocks sparinglyimg"
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94User: Andy, what's your source for the claim that half of public school children are illiterate?img Andy: Uh ... evilutionists can't answer basic questions about the Bible, like how many Gospels are attributed to eyewitnesses.img User: But it's possible for evolutionists to read the Bible.img Andy: You'd have a fine career with tobacco companies, denying that smoking causes lung cancer.img
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115Another counterexample to evolution: We have the perfect number of teeth to fit our mouths. Wisdom teeth, you say?img There are no wisdom teeth.img And don't mess with Andy's "autumn foliage" line!
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12MarkGall sucks up to Roger adds to his article on "what to expect in college math" with a concept that no math student will leave college without knowing: the double bubble conjecture!img
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35Bees have caste systems, which are irreducibly complex "on the social level." Therefore, the theory of evolution is false.img
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88An almost incomprehensible Andy rant. "There is no need for 2 kidneys!", "Having two kidneys is a test from God!", "Evolution supposedly occurred in pre-obesity times!".img Huh? MORE: Evolution is to blameimg for people dying from kidney disease!
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49Andy, in defense against an angry evolutionist, cites two completely made up indisputable statistics.img
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88Vandal adds "counter examples of evolution"img. Andy revertsimg and adds a Banhammerimg for good measure. Oh hey, that thing about the kidneysimg was actually a great idea.
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7Hitwinimg strikes again, while Conservative replicates his 'evolution is hitler' article in miniature.
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21Conservapedia has confusing guidelinesimg concerning real names in user accountsimg. Sometimes you can have fun with themimg. Sometimes, users get a free rideimg. And sometimes, you make an embarassing mistake!img
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44User: Andy, I think your blog is broken.img JPratt: SILENCE, PEON!img BANHAMM-... No, wait... that actually looked like a valid question..."img
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-11Economics student answers question 6 so badly it's almost funny.img Andy: 8/10.img
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-20Economics student: Competition can be defined as the free market.img Andy: Good new definition.img
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-13Wow! In one of the rarest occasions, Andy cites a liberal blog in the Conservapedia newsimg. Oh, by the way Andy, if you actually looked the charts VERY carefully about the gay marriage, the results show that people are split even (although the support for gay marriage is a TAD higher than opposition).
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80Andy: The Biblical account cannot be disproved. Let's be clear about that.img Good? Okay, we know that the Deluge happened, and since it's easier to save animals from a flood with God's help than without,img the theory of evolution is false. LATER Andy adds this to his list of evolution counterexamplesimg.
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-17Heads-up, Jpatt: Ann Coulter has already said all this.img
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8Remember, you're only allowed to whine about something being detrimental to America if Conservapedia disapproves of it.img
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8Jpatt on violence against women in movies: Conservatives fight for women, liberals exploit them.img Susie Bright on wingnuts who talk like that: "Tell them to send a royalty check to Andrea and ask them what they’ve done lately to empower female sexual authority." [1]
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11Conservapedia the Candidate-Picker, Part 2: Andy plays upimg the conservative endorsements rolling in for "maverick" Congressional candidate Doug Hoffman, who chickened out of the latest debate campaigns his own way, because he's apparently clueless his own man.
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2The onlyimg non-sysop editimg to an article that had been unprotected for a mere 9 hours and 16 minutes since its creation more than one year ago leads to another month-long protection.img But what if some pesky non-sysops still want to editimg it? Please do all the work in the talk-talk-talk space, I'll take credit for inserting it into the article.img
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3A user wants to put up a banner on Conservapedia's mainpageimg so as to "welcome students, readers, editors and the likes." To prevent unnecessary destruction of irony meters they should delay this until after they turn account creation on again.
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42Conservapedia, June 4: Yippee! Chris Christie's on his way to trouncing his lib-burr-rul opponent!img Conservapedia, October 28: Christie's a dirty RINO and that's why he's getting creamed by said opponent!img
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-23Has the world gone mad? Andy accepts a user's apology.img
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3OscarJ: A statement that "lycanthropy" is derived from Latin rather than Greek is parody.img
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27According to Andy's new translation of Luke 2:36, "prophetess" is a "feminist rendition".img Yep, Andy, just like when all those awful feminists made the airlines quit saying "flight attendant" and use the more politically correct "stewardess" instead.
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29User removesimg some blatant plagiarism that had been surgically altered with engineered MemeShock language.img Jpatt rewards him with a revertimg and block.img
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7Andy ("Liberals Deny the Power of Ideas")img Schlafly has now got it into his head that whoever spends the most money will win an election.img
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63RobS: Obama administration criticised over domestic spying program!img.....in a report dated: 2007 UPDATE: Removedimg by Karajou after all of 16 hours.
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6Andy: Inherit the Wind is being palmed off as an accurate historical record.img Perhaps Andy also thinks Shakespeare's Macbeth is an accurate historical record.
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21Andy, being thoroughly flattened in the Ida debate, tries for a save: The British Museum knew from the startimg that Piltdown Man was a fraud.
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24A wingnut can't understand Obama's economic policy. Therefore, Jeremiah Wright taught Obama to hate America.img
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60TerryH rolls up his sleeves.img
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34Andy: The New Living Translation of the Bible is rarely used.img Uh, right; so rarely used that it's been known to outsell the NIV.
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10Andy: Those lib-burr-rul professors who translated the NIV appeased pro-choicersimg by removing several references to "unborn child." He of course fails to provide specific verse numbers, due to the claim's likely origin.
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60Andy explains agnosticism.img Apparently, a fair-minded agnostic is a Christian on Monday, Wednesday, Sunday, and every other Saturday.
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37Andy: Catholics and Protestants haven't fought in centuriesimg. The Trusworthy Encyclopedia disagreesimg
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13According to Andy, its been a bad year for the liberal media reporting hoaxes.img Why, yes, Andy, indeed, it has been a bad year for reportingimg hoaxes.
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38Indeed, Andy, it doesn't get better than this. The prodigal son went out on the piss boozingimg, a thought that Andy's clearly proud of.img With one minor discrepancy What next - the 5,000 being fed on fish fingers and buns?
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43Andy: the Bible Retranslation Project will help unite Christian denominations.img Yes, unite them into thinking you're completely insane.
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46To "avoid repetition," Andy favors translating the same Greek word three different ways in the same verse.img
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-12Andy showcases for us his ignorance of mathematics.img Heard of polar coordinates, Andy?
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18The biased liberal media networks continue their campaign to silence conservative opinion by refusing to participate in a White House press conference unless Fox News is let in as well. Andy, failing to see the irony, puts the story up as a news item.img
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49"Mom, he punched me.img" "Yeah, but he called me an idiotimg". Will it ever end?
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18BertSchlossberg, forgetting his writing skills for a moment, posts some word salad about the CBP.img Andy replies: Well put, Bert! Modern translations cannot be left to the modern equivalent of the Pharisees: liberal professors.img
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88Joseph Farah of WorldNutDaily rips the Conservative Bible Project a new one:img "Basically, those 'conservatives' participating in this idea weren't really upset when liberals messed with the Holy Scriptures. They were upset only with how they messed with them." Andy: WHAAAAA!img HE PLAINLY MISUNDERSTAND US! [sic]
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6Michigan, with the Democrats and lib-burr-rul union people in charge, is going down the tubes. But North Dakota, a conservative state that's had a solidly Democratic congressional delegation for the last 20 years, is, of course, doing fine.img
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40The "Ida" disputes continue. User: "Ida" is more a media issue than an evolutionary biology issue. The media overhyped everything, not scientists.img Andy: That proves my point: Evilutionists mislead the public and should refund the taxpayers' money.img UPDATE: User: Try reading the links I gave you.img Andy: Scientists announced the finding of the fossil. Therefore, they were lying.img Oh, and evilutionists never learn about the Most Logical Book Ever, the Bible.
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52Abortion and breast cancer are linked! And to prove it, Susan G. Komen for the Cure gave some money to Planned Parenthood!img
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33Another claim of evolution is shown to be false by evolutionists. Therefore, evilutionists should apologizeimg for their hearty skepticism about the claim deceit.
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-41Ed creates yet another stubimg. This time, it's about credit for invention, which Ed says goes unfairly to "the last link in the chain". Presumably he's feeling bitter about lack of recognition for all the worthless stub articles he created and left for others to work into a decent state.
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7TerryH gives an exhaustive rundown of his lack of Bible scholarship skills:img "I can read ancient Greek almost as quickly as I can run it through Google Translate read modern English. Better yet, I have a pocket-size dictionary of modern Greek three lexicons available to me!"
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6Ed helpfully deletesimg a news bite with a bad reference — a mere eight days after it went up.img
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0JPatt can't tell myth from legendimg or one misquotation and one unfulfilled campaign promise from 7 lies
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93Andy:"The Holy Spirit guides me!"img
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53According to the beloved leader Andyimg, Conservapedia isn't a dictatorship but the public schools are.
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57Andy deludes himselfimg that he is competing with serious Bible scholars.
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57Jpattimg performsimg some,img um,img unusualimg pagemoves.img Among other changes, Rush Limbaugh is now a gay bomb and Ronald Reagan a gay cupid.
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322User: The theory of relativity has been useful in the past.img Andy: You're clueless. Relativity hasn't done anything useful, because I say so.img Having won this debate, he proceeds to ask, Why should taxpayers be forced to pay for this scientific unproductive work?img UPDATE: HERESY!img Andy's response? La-la-la; I can't hear you!img MORE: Roger makes the mistake of bringing factsimg to a debate with Andy. EVEN MORE: Andy tries to win with a Bible reference.img Roger responds by making Andy into his bitch.img STILL MORE: Andy claims big brother is "ranting"img WHEN WILL IT END? Roger fights backimg, so Andy calls him absurd.img Roger replies yet again.img Will Andy insist on last wordism, or let it slide? AND ON WE GO! Sorry "bro" but this discussion, like relativity, yields nothing productive.img AND THE WINNER IS...ANDY!!!img
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74Somebody finally calls Andy out on his railing against elites.img MORE: Andy responds by changing the definition of "elite,"img of course failing to note how the Nobel Prize people fall under his new definition (or how he does not).
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78Andy sez that the Nobel Prize is given by liberals to other liberalsimg. Like that noted icon of liberalism, Henry Kissinger. And flaming leftist Andrei Sakharov. And commie-lover F.W. deKlerk. And Soviet stooge Lech Walesa. And that dangerous radical, Mother Teresa. And (according to numerous conservative "thinkers"), famed Republican Martin Luther King.
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121Andy fails to see any differenceimg between Norway and Sweden (or between a parliament and an academy of science).
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29Some people at the NSF are accustomed to browsing smut on the Internet. Andy: This somehow makes the entire foundation deceitful and eager to throw money at evilutionist junk science.img
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25Andy values logic at work: an article about the private Yale University demonstrates somethingimg about professor values at public universities.
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33Roger jumps to defend Mommy: Wikipedia says she supported segregation but the book review they cite doesn't say that!img The book review in fact says that she "revolted at the 1960 Republican convention after Richard Nixon supported a civil rights plank ... demanding aggressive action against segregation." (Oh, and Wikipedia fails to mention the completely inconsequential essential fact that the book reviewer is a Jew.)
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61Andy cleans out "atheistic bias"img from the starlight problem article by removing a quote from a creationist.
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17Irony meter alert: Kettle Karajou is upsetimg that Wikipedia editors are attempting to remove false information from Wikipedia burn evidence.
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2Is there a darker side to someone fantasizing about assassinating Rush Limbaugh?img Well, we don't know. Is there a darker side to a bunch of wingnuts fantasizing about the sudden death of a Democratic senator?
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0Jinx hi Jinx!: Look, master; these large areas that tend to vote Republican have higher volunteer percentages than places that tend to vote Democrat. That proves that conservatives volunteer more than liberals.img Andy: "This is just the kind of substance that makes our site so informative."img But poor Jinx still doesn't get all his rights back.
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13Eek!img Hollywood is poisoning your kids' minds with a lib-burr-rul commie cartoon! Watch out; they'll be fluoridating the water next!
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29Andy blows off some more Bible commentaryimg by stating that he wants Conservapedia to be, not a "chat site," but a chat site where he's the only one allowed to chat an encyclopedia.
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9Andy apparently mistakes a joke for serious news,img which is understandable, since the source seems more credible than most of the others he uses.
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64Schlafly Statistics revealed in their true colours: A user adds some new reasons why liberals are liberals.img Andy promptly juggles a few percentagesimg so the proportions attached to said reasons do not add up to 120%.
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-51Andy: "Crackpot, this site is not for you."img News to us...
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67The First Amendment to the United States Constitution: now also applicable in the United Kingdom, apparentlyimg.
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31"Those lib-rul professors can't stomachimg the fact that Columbus discovered America!" Obviously Andy still thinks that Leif Ericsson was a myth, probably invented by Charles Darwin.
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-13How dare those lib-burr-ruls make a partisan display of anti-democracyimg by objecting to Rush Limbaugh's plans to buy their football team! (It isn't actually about party at all; the newsbite should read, "Surprise, anti-racist union opposes racist owners in a partisan display of anti-democracy.")
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43Andy illustrates his pedagogical philosophy perfectly by viewing ignorance as a sign of intelligence.img
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22Andy to Student A:"On question 3, you might give the order of the activities. But never mind, full marks!"img Andy to Student B:"On question 3 you gave the order but you got it wrong. Minus 1!"img
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91Something straight from the quote generator.img
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40Economics student: A free market is essential to charity.img There was no charity in Nazi Germany because Hitler was a communist. Andy: EGGSELLENT! Full marks!img
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0The Bible Corruption Project continues apace. Today's problem: how to translate "disciple". Ah, but of course! "Homeschoolerimg"! UPDATE: Andy: "Homeschooler" wouldn't work.img Make some substantive contributions. Godspeed.
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14DonaldM: Let there beimg forbidden words Newspeak. JFrasier: Newspeak is goodimg. Andy: Newspeak is doubleplusgoodimg
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42Andy confirms it: "closed-mindedness" is a synonym for "atheism," and suitable to replace "unbelief" in the Bible.img
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8Andy shows his delusions of grandeur again: William Tyndale would have finished his Bible translation if only he had had Conservapedia.img
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121 Mark: Lightning has struck the creature, master!img Andy: It's alive!img It's ALIVE! Flip the switch! Mark: Yes, master!img Andy:I shall name it... AlFrankensteinBot!img Mark: Our success is greatimg, master! Townsfolk: Ummm... your abomination stitched from the body parts of dead liberals will be easily defeatedimg. UPDATE: The first victim!img
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19User: Really, you should not twist the Bibleimg Jinxmchue: Sir, let me assume you also hold these unrelated opinions. Ergo, your argument is invalid!img
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6It was bound to happen. Of all the scathing ridicule of CP in the media of late, Andy takes one exampleimg and puts it on the front page. They're making fun of you Andy. The whole world is. The other kids in elementary school were making fun of you too, and you didn't get it then either, did you?
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32Daniel1212 tries to insert a little balanceimg into the monologue dialogue on the Adulteress Story. Pope Andy, disliking reading more than a sentence the idea that conservatives disagree with him,img denies it the imprimatur.img
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0A blogger writes a column urging moderation in the global warming debate. This blogger happens to blog for a newspaper. Conservapedia: LOOK! LOOK! THE LIB-BURR-RUL MEDIA ARE ALL ADMITTING THAT GLOBAL WARMING'S A FRAUD!img
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13Andy makes a non sequitur statement in regards to Colbert's recent satire on their Conservative Bible Project: Public school kids watch repeats, therefore watching TV and repeats is the life of millions of teenagersimg! UPDATE: Andy thinks that Colbert exploits an audience made up of public school childrenimg. Really Andy, do you think 7-year-olds would watch a TV-14 satirical "news" show?
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1MarkGall breaks every irony meter from here to Jerusalem: "Careful scholarship is required to reconstruct the text from extant early sources."img
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9Andy, noting that the phrase unclean spirits "seems archaic," helpfully fine-tunes itimg by replacing it with "the Devil."
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26Andy: Leaving in "liberal vandalism such as the Adulteress Story" is contrary to all scholarship.img Except, of course, that of insignificant evilutionist hacks like St. Augustine, but let's not quibble here...
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30Andy, master of the vacuous recursive definition: Conservatism is freedom from liberal bias.img
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25A climate research center runs out of disk space to store climate data. Conservapedia: They're liars! They aren't out of space at all! The data proves that global warming is a scam and they're burning the evidence!img
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35Commencing countdown to Conservapedia meltdown over this...3...2...1.... Update: Bam!img But the article on Barack Hussein Obamaimg will ignore the news as long as possible.
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32Daniel1212 makes a rather titanic effort to convince Andy that he is on the wrong track with the Conservative Bible Project. Andy responds tersely: Current translations are liberal. Case closed. Quit talk, talk, talking and resisting logic. We welcome your concise contributions. Godspeed.img UPDATE: LA-LA-LA-LA-LA; I CAN'T HEAR YOU!img
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16User suggests some improvementsimg to the Counterexamples to Evolution page. Andy responds: Open your mind and quit nitpicking. Godspeed.img User then rushes toward a block by asking for a substantive response.img
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0Lib'ruls got your goat? TK knows what to do!img
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0The Washington Post doesn't know Andy's name. Schlafly jumps on it and declares epic winz!!!img
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31A brave insertionimg of some reasons why the Conservative Bible Project may not be the best thing to happen since Jesus was warm. Karajou: Yourimg point?img
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-28Our favorite quote hoover Bible scholar, Daniel1212, contributes a nice little word-saladimg to the Conservative Bible Project.
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25Andy: Replacing "Pharisees" with "liberals"img in the Bible is a good suggestion.img Uh-oh! Quick revert is quick!img
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-13Here is wisdom. Let him that hath few enough marbles to think the Conservative Bible Project in any way credible, count the number of the beast bytes added in this contributionimg to the project.
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5Breaking news: CNN has been nationalized without anyone knowing about it, as evidenced by its >gasp!< supporting a government proposal.img Conservapedia, obviously, has been privatized since the days of the Bush administration.
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17Irony meter shatters: To avoid being suckered by television, Conservapedia advises that you should stop watching TV and put your head in the clouds a Bible.img But when Faux News makes an ad that tees off the lib-burr-rul media, there is no trickery at all,img and you should watch it over and over again!
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9After six months' delay a speedy inquiry, Jinx hi Jinx! gets a shiny new banhammer!img (He still is not trusted enough to edit at night or to upload images, although the latter mistrust might be somewhat justified.)
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80 The Gauntlet has been thrown: Stephen Colbert's The Colbert Report demands that viewers add him to the Conservative Bible. Update: Ask and ye shall receive.img
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4Oh noes! Lots and lots of Muslims!img Shockingly, large countries have more Muslims than small ones! (Oh, there's still about 600 million more Christians.)
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53You aint no conservative! No real conservative would use a capital "C"!img
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14Andy: The Atheists have taken over the NFL!!!img

Reality: Try reading the rules of the game (3rd bullet point)...or for that matter even the rest of the article you cited...

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-7TK: "Bit by bit, slowly but surely, I will be increasing my presence back to normal."img And if you strike him down, he shall become MORE POWERFUL THAN YOU COULD POSSIBLY IMAGINE!
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56For extra credit in your homework for Economics Lecture 5, discuss whether or not the Conservative Bible Project is a good thingimg For a lot of extra credit, explain why it's the most significant event in Bible publishing since the invention of movable type Jesus. UPDATE: Teh Assfly has deleted the questionimg and locked the page, declaring the lecture complete.img
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45Bible translations can not be trustedimg, the Bible has been tampered withimg, the Apostles themselves are unreliableimg. Who can we trust?img Andy: ME Jesusimg. Also, my ten guidelines will henceforth be referred to as Commandmentsimg
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24Karajou starts a page on the Jesus Seminar, adding that its a radical, liberal organizationimg that (gasp) tried to decide what Jesus did and didn't say. Pot, meet kettle. He then twiceimg removesimg a very helpful 'see also' link.
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124 Andy's Insane Conservative Bible Projectimg worms its way up to the Digg Top Ten! Conservapedia's sudden popularity causes a temporary breakdown. UPDATE: The liberal radio talk show, The Young Turks also talks about CP's project. UPDATE:The Huffington Post and USNews join the party! UPDATE: The New Republic, Harper's Boing Boing and NYDailyNews pick up the story! And many more!
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107 User: I can detect liberal style using a robot!img This way, we'll be able to detect parodists! Andy: BRILLIANT!img UPDATE: User creates mathematical formula for liberalismimg.
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28 Jinx hi Jinx!doesn't want his rights back.img Nope. Not in the least. But he's very sorry. But we knew that already. Andy: Ah, that's alright Jinx. I'm a conservative, and we say forgive and forget!img (That's, forget about giving you your rights back.)
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10Those nasty Dems play the blame game.img How foolish of them! Everyone knows Chicago lost because of the deceptive Michelle Obama!img
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97Chicago lost because Michelle Obama LIEDimg User: Well not reallyimg Karajou: Obama communist cronies NAMBLA terrorists murder messiah Jesus Christ!img A classic conservapedian "debate" ensuesimg, which Caribouimg and Andy neatly wrap upimg. Jinxmunx proceeds to declare victoryimg over the banned user and finishes with a nice incest allusionimg.
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15"The original language of the Bible sucks, old Englishimg sucks, modern English sucks, translation bias sucks." - Andy sure has a... unique way of justifyingimg his "Original language to old English to modern English with translation bias" project.
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36Ken beautifully illustrates Poe's Law by quoting obvious satire to discuss penguin sexualityimg
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19"We cannot emphasize enough that Chicago didn't getimg theimg Olympics!img Really- we mean it!img"
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12As usual, Godwin's Lawimg at work in regards to the evolutionary paradigm on the internet!1!! Note to Ken, come back with a more valid argument without bringing up Hitler.
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30Conservapedia celebratesimg the Agony Thrill of Defeat for Chicago's bid to host the 2016 Olympic games, which is suddenly an Obama-related failure.
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88User 1: I believe in gravity!img Andy:I'm not so sure...img User 2:Here's an explanation of why gravity works the way it does!img User 1: Here's another one!img Andy:Math and physics don't actually have anything to do with each otherimg. Everybody knows that God hates math and that he probably doesn't like the number 2 as much as he does 2.01img. Not to mention, I've actually been proven right, scientists just won't admit it because they're all relativity-loving liberals!img
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86Andy: In the UK, Australia and Canada, freedom of speech does not existimg. UPDATE: RJJ attempts to save the articleimg from absurdity, but Andy decides he's had enough factual insertions and re-insertsimg the "economical" line.
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99Andy: Vaccine kills!img User: Not according to the people who actually know what they'reimg talking about. Andy: Yeah, ummm...well...Conspiracy!!!img
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137What's a better way to say "damsel"? When translating the Bible from English to worse English? Bimbo!img

Footnotes

  1. WARNING: The voting system might be under attack by neoconvicts, koo koo klansmen and/or the International Jewish Conspiracy, so take it with a grain of salt.