Campaign!

G'day, fellow RationalWikians! Don't forget to visit the Campaign page of the 2016 Board of trustees election in order to make your voice heard. Suggested activities include:

  • Endorsing select candidates (lending a hand to your loyal henchmen and/or glorious overlords!)
  • Anti-endorsing select candidates (character-assassinating your hated opponents!)
  • Providing moar goat (please wipe afterwards)
  • Just asking questions to the candidates

Your participation might help other users better direct their votes. More importantly, it'll show the world that we've yet to go full Citizendium in terms of election hype!

from FuzzyCatPotato (Talk), group Site wide (urgent) at 00:24, 25 July 2016

Fun:A day in the life of Barack HUSSEIN Obama

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Obama's position makes him very busy. Here is just a bit of what he has to go through:

9:00 AM Morning call to prayer, as a seekrit Muslim.
9:10 AM Renounce previous call to prayer, as a seekrit Atheist.
9:30 AM Eat babies for breakfast.
10:30 AM Brunch with Bin Laden.
11:00 AM Institute socialism.
11:30 AM Lock people up in FEMA concentration camps.
12:00 PM Death to America.
12:30 PM Eat puppies for lunch. Sacrifice a kitten to Satan.
12:40 PM Go to the toilet. Use an American flag, the Constitution and pages from the Bible as toilet paper.
1:00 PM Throw welcoming party for illegal Mexican immigrants, invading North Korean soldiers, Al Qaeda suicide bombers and DAESH invaders.
1:30 PM Tour kindergartens handing out condoms.
2:00 PM Steal money from hardworkin' white job-creators at gunpoint and hand that money out to homeless black people on street corners.
2:30 PM Plant fake dinosaur and Neanderthal fossils in the ground to make people believe in evolution.
3:00 PM Crash planes into Pentagon.
3:30 PM Conspire with Jews and aliens at Masonic lodges, the Bilderberg Conference, the Bohemian Grove and the Skull and Bones Crypt.
4:00 PM Censor conservatives.
4:30 PM Preside over gay weddings.
5:00 PM Confiscate (largely defensive weapons of) guns.
5:30 PM Serve on government-funded healthcare death panels. Deny service to babies with Down's syndrome. Pull the plugs on grandmothers.
6:00 PM Call leaders of Vast Liberal Media Conspiracy, dictate stories for the evening news.
6:30 PM Cut military funding.
7:00 PM Attend drug and gay sex party in Lincoln Bedroom.
7:30 PM Eat baby seals for dinner.
8:00 PM Deface portraits of the good Presidents: Reagan, Washington, Reagan, Lincoln, Reagan, Nixon, Reagan, Warren G. Harding, Reagan, George W. Bush, Reagan and Reagan.
8:30 PM Sharpen fangs, claws and horns; polish scales; clean the clefts between hooves.
9:00 PM Come up with new forged birth certificate.
9:30 PM Curl up in an armchair with a mug of cocoa to read Mein Kampf, Das Kapital and the Necronomicon.
10:00 PM Telephone various half-siblings, cousins, aunts, in-laws and invite them to come to the US illegally.
10:30 PM Stand on balcony overlooking Washington D.C., talons raised overhead, and laugh maniacally with the Imperial March, Sauron's Theme or Night on Bald Mountain playing in the background.
11:00 PM After a light snack of aborted fetal tissue, retire to bed.
3:00 AM Ignore urgent phone call from Pentagon; tired after hard day of implementing socialism and destroying America.
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