Fun:Prison

Tired of laughing? RationalWiki has a slightly more serious article about Prison.

Let's poke fun of prison rules

United States

Apparently there's more than 100 acts that aren't tolerated. gpo.gov lists such acts in four categories. While there are some rather obvious ones, here's some fun ones (the whole tables can be observed on page 631 of the pdf for year 2016):

• Greatest Severity Level
  • Prohibited Acts
    • (100) Killing — Holy shit, never expected this one
    • (221) Being in an unauthorized area with a person of the opposite sex without staff permission. — Is there really a good reason to segregate genders? It's not like gay people exist or prisoners having sex with their same sex or anything.
  • Available sanctions
    • Disciplinary segregation (up to 6 months) — Legal jargon that translate solitary confinement
    • Other generic punishments such as fines, loss of phones privileges
• Low Severity Level
  • Prohibited Acts
    • (402) Malingering, feigning illness. — No way this can be abused
    • (404) Using abusive or obscene language. — FUCK
    • (409) Unauthorized physical contact (e.g., kissing, embracing) — It's more hilarious out of context but these are allowed so long as it doesn't endanger safety.
  • Available sanctions
    • Disciplinary segregation (up to 1 month) — Legal jargon that translate solitary confinement
    • Forfeit earned SGT or non-vested GCT up to 10% or up to 15 days, whichever is less, and/or terminate or disallow extra good time (EGT) — What the fuck? "Extra good time"?
    • Other generic punishments such as fines, loss of phones privileges.