BDSM and rape

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I think we discussed this before. The overwhelming hurdles a woman (or man) faces when the whole point of the sexual relationship is to push "vanilla sex" standards, to "abuse" (by the outside world's eyes), or even in some cases to "be raped" sorta. or enact that, anyhow. Saying "my boyfriend raped me" is hard enough to get anyone to care. Saying "I had had sex with three men that night, but said my safe word for the 4th who I didn't trust" is going to get zilch attention outside the community.

But as this is the second report you are showing me, sounds like within the community there are voices being raised. Though the responses are very blame the victim-ish. "know your partner well", "ask around". If people close ranks, neither of those will be very effective.


And I hadn't even onsidered the "unintentional rape" that goes along with her point on "miscommunication". That you *think* your bottom is enjoying something, and you want to give them a good time and push the limits, only to find out you read teh whole scene wrong.

Green mowse.pngGodotThree words: SALON DU CHOCOLAT13:39, 26 June 2012

Given the very nature of BDSM relationships, I don't think it's entirely unreasonable to ask for a higher standard of due diligence from people who want to put themselves into vulnerable situations by choice.

Scarlet A.pngpathetic13:53, 26 June 2012