User:Bttsstewart

As a confirmed mustard jar for taking on this job as a Sysop on RationalWiki: I, Bttsstewart, pledge to only block users if they ask for it, or insert unfunny vandalism. I furthermore pledge that if I indulge in secret private conversations about you, we will make a formal report to the mob. Is that all? If you impugn my motives without warrant, or challenge my "AUTHORITY", er, there is nothing I can or will do.

Atheism

I am an atheist, but I'm agnostic when it comes to Santa Claus. If he doesn't exist, where do the presents come from? If a painting is proof of a painter, then Christmas gifts are proof of a magical gift giver. They all say "From Santa" on them. I hear these crazy and insane theories trying to explain them away like "the parents do it" and stuff but really...come on!

Proof of Santa's existence

THIS IS NOT

B   U   L   L "If you are in possession of this revolutionary secret of science, why not prove it and be hailed as the new Newton? Of course, we know the answer. You can't do it. You are a fake."  —  Richard Dawkins

I can prove the existence of Santa without referencing my faith! All you need to know is the following to know in your heart that Santa does exist. These proofs are a way of "circumventing the intellect and speaking directly to the conscience" so the Theory of Parental Gifts seems to disappear.

• You're telling me that every parent in every English speaking country in the world are secretly buying gifts for their kids and putting them under the Christmas tree and when the kids get the presents they all blame it on the same guy in a red suit by pure coincidence?! That sounds so crazy, I could never believe it. How can people believe the Theory of Parental Gifts given this obvious flaw in the theory?
• What are the chances that all the families everywhere would chose the same guy to blame the presents on?
• It's so simple; if gifts from Santa exist, than Santa himself exists!
• Santa is said to live in the North Pole. This is "outside" the regular world in a way so it's perfectly reasonable to say that magic exists there. Who are people to say there's no Santa when it's perfectly possible there is one?
• Why would so many parents lie like that? They must know there is a Santa Claus deep down. Some people just deny it so they can get away with being on the Naughty List.
• Santa is the very cause of gift giving. Without Santa, presents just "happened" by pure coincidence? I could never believe that.
• Santa has clearly revealed Himself to us through the divine nature of Christmas. It cannot be coincidence that so many people coincidentally feel the need to give gifts at the same time of year by chance. There must have been a divine Santa to bring the spirit of giving about. It is the only explanation.
• Santa's image (the man in the red coat with a white beard) has been spread so far and wide across the world that it must have needed a divine hand to guide it. Santa's Holy Word has been revealed to us through the Sacred Christmas Doctrine; the Christmas Carol. The Christmas Carols are the Word of Santa. People couldn't have written it by themselves given the nature of the Holy Carols to bring about peace when sung.
• Santa clearly wrote in His Word in the Book of Santa Claus is Coming to Town that if we don't cry or pout, we will be rewarded with presents at Christmas. This is clearly what Santa wrote in His Word and His Word proves He exists. It is Santa's truth and Santa obviously doesn't lie because that would be bad and that would mean less presents. Santa is Good all year round and wants us to be too.
• I also fail to see why so many people would feel the need to be in on the conspiracy.

Proofs of Santa's existance like these are everywhere. How can these Santa Claus atheists NOT see this obvious proof?

No, seriously

• No, seriously, I don't actually believe any of that. No, really. No views expressed on this webpage necessarily reflect mine.
• And I think we have to accept that creationism is just ridiculous.
• The phrase "circumventing the intellect and speaking directly to the conscience" is inspired by Kirk Cameron (Mr. Stupid Creationist 2009).
• Please direct all criticism and comments to the 'talk' page.
• Additionally, I got promoted to a sysop (whatever that means...) Yay! It's like, I have to edit stuff and do things or whatever.

My thoughts on religion

• As long as no dirty tactics are used and everybody's fair, trying to prove creationism in a debate is like trying to win a sword fight with a toothpick.
• Christianity is like TV; It does nothing for the intellect, people definately got along without it before it was invented, but nobody who likes it would dare give it up.
• Faith is to a man what a bicycle is to a goldfish.
• The Christian belief system is yet to be justified in any way.
• If America weren't so hellbent on electing over-Christian governors and presidents, the world might be just a little bit better for it. But if atheists were allowed in American government, the world would be MUCH better off.