User:Chasanidya/pony

Yes, Ms Cloppy, there is an Invisible Pink Unicorn!

Dear Mr Chasanidya: I am a cute little pony, so I know that women and girls and females all over will just love me to pieces. However, I don't believe at all in the Invisible Pink Unicorn, and I know that women don't like atheists at all. What should I do?

Dear Ms Cloppy.

Not believe in the Invisible Pink Unicorn? You might as well not believe in the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Your little friends are freaking idiots. They have been twerped by the atheism of an atheist age, and they're not going to believe anything they can't detect and scan with their tricorders. You have to understand, my dear Cloppy, that all human minds, be they grown ups or children, are weak and squishy, and compared with the endless wonders of the entire universe, they are like stupid little ants, eh?

So, yes, Cloppy, there is an Invisible Pink Unicorn. She exists as certainly as:

• love

• generosity

• faith

• beauty

• joy

• 4G iPhones

because She is the very source, origin, and creator of all these things. Logically, therefor, if the Invisible Pink Unicorn did not exist, then the world would be nothing but a big pile of hate, selfishness, distrust, ugliness, despair and those awful bricks that people used to lug around to make phone calls on. Do you remember those? Those beepie little annoying buggers? Everybody hated them. Well, you know the only thing that people hate more that a short excerpt from 'Gran Vals' by 19th century Spanish romantic composer/guitarist Francisco de Asís Tárrega y Eixea? Here's a hint: it starts with an A and rhymes with atheist.

Now, is that the kind of world we want to live in? Is it? I know I sure wouldn't want to live on that earth - in fact, as soon as I get my subspace transmitter operational you're pal cha'SanIDya is so 23-skidoo, but that's another story!

So, here's the deal: human females love:

• getting flowers as gifts on valentines day

• Francisco de Asís Tárrega y Eixea

• ponies

Human females don't love:

• getting power tools as gifts on Valentines (trust your pal Cha'SanIDya on this one, he knows what he's talking about)

• the music of Francisco de Asís Tárrega y Eixea.

• atheist ponies.

See the article, atheism and Equine polysaccharide storage myopathy or atheism and Venezuelan equine encephalitis virus. Can you name one horse who believed in the Invisible Pink Unicorn AND who didn't have Venezuelan equine encephalitis virus or equine polysaccharide storage myopathy? Well, can you? Even just one name? (and before you mention the name of the pony that I know you're about to say, stop, that was equine protozoal myeloencephalitis, so don't bother)

So, I hope this answers your question, Ms. Cloppy.

Cheers

cha'SanIDya