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If atheism is a religion...

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This is a response to Essay:Atheism is a religion.

If atheism is a religion, then...[edit]

  • Not believing in Santa Claus is a religion.
  • Science is a religion or a cult.
  • Unemployment is a (full-time) job.
  • Not collecting stamps is a hobby.
  • Not playing tennis is a sport.
  • Abstinence is a sexual activity.
  • Off is a TV channel.
  • Insulting the concept of government - e.g. by not paying taxes - is patriotism.
  • An empty bowl is a meal.
  • Silence is a noise.
  • Remaining silent is a speech.
  • Not fighting is an act of violence.
  • Bald is a hair colour.
  • Nudity is a costume.
  • Cleanliness is a stain.
  • Sanity is a mental illness.
  • Being dead is an illness.
  • Empty space is matter.
  • Clear is a colour.
  • Vacuum is a smell.
  • Anarchy is structured government
  • Not watching boxing matches makes you a fan of archery.
  • Having never cared much for politics, and having never read Mein Kampf, your lack of a criticism of that work makes you a Nazi.
  • Having never cared much for gender politics, your lack of criticism of traditional gender roles makes you a chauvinist.
  • "Nothing" can have a volume.
  • Outer space is a planet.
  • "Nowhere" is a place.
  • "Nobody" is a person.
  • "Nobody" is a public office position.
  • "Nothing" is an object.
  • War is Peace
  • Pacifists are warmongers.
  • Freedom is Slavery
  • Ignorance is Strength (or knowledge)
  • Knowledge is burden.
  • Not doing drugs means you're an addict
  • Discrimination is favoritism.
  • This essay is not a fragrant stream of piss.

Please add more.