Fun:Chicken coup

Were you looking for the chicken coop?

The chicken coup is the prophesied future takeover of RationalWiki by headless chickens. Though some heretics claim that this has already occurred (and thus that we are living in the chicken millennium), this simply cannot be the case, as the events described in the book of Goat have yet to occur.

Signs of the coup[edit]

There shall come four jerboa-riders, and their names shall be Conquest, War, Famine, and Death.^[1]

Some also say that Goat shall seal twelve thousand from each of the twelve tribes of Wikipedia, ~~but as of writing, Wikipedia didn't have that many active editors.^[2]~~ AN OMNIPOTENT GOAT IS NOT COWED BY SUCH PUNY LOGIC. OR PIGGED. OR HORSED. BRING ME THAT "MINERAL" HUMAN.

The coup itself[edit]

Then the forces of all the world shall march to Meggedo, and there they shall meet the great mob of headless chickens, and there do battle, and the headless chickens shall be victorious, and into the lake of fire shall the sane people be cast for all eternity.^[3]

Footnotes[edit]

↑ Book of Goat 6:1-8 reads as follows: ¹And I saw when the Goat opened one of the seals, and I heard, as it were the noise of thunder, one of the four beasts saying, Come and see. ²And I saw, and behold a white jerboa: and he that sat on him had a mop; and a crown was given unto him: and he went forth banhammering, and to banhammer. ³And when he had opened the second seal, I heard the second beast say, Come and see. ⁴And there went out another jerboa that was red: and power was given to him that sat thereon to take peace from the earth, and that they should revert one another: and there was given unto him a great rollback button to roll them all back. ⁵And when he had opened the third seal, I heard the third beast say, Come and see. And I beheld, and lo a black jerboa; and he that sat on him had a mop in his hand. ⁶And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts say, A funspace page for a penny, and an article for a penny; and see thou hurt not the CP space. ⁷And when he had opened the fourth seal, I heard the voice of the fourth beast say, Come and see. ⁸And I looked, and behold a pale jerboa: and his name that sat on him was boredom, and wikibreaks followed with him. And power was given unto them over the fourth part of the wiki, to kill with banhammer, and with revert, and with ancient cruft, and with weariness of this wiki.
↑ Special:Statistics
↑ Some people say they were already there for a thousand years previously, but this is somewhat speculative.

[1] Book of Goat 6:1-8 reads as follows: ¹And I saw when the Goat opened one of the seals, and I heard, as it were the noise of thunder, one of the four beasts saying, Come and see. ²And I saw, and behold a white jerboa: and he that sat on him had a mop; and a crown was given unto him: and he went forth banhammering, and to banhammer. ³And when he had opened the second seal, I heard the second beast say, Come and see. ⁴And there went out another jerboa that was red: and power was given to him that sat thereon to take peace from the earth, and that they should revert one another: and there was given unto him a great rollback button to roll them all back. ⁵And when he had opened the third seal, I heard the third beast say, Come and see. And I beheld, and lo a black jerboa; and he that sat on him had a mop in his hand. ⁶And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts say, A funspace page for a penny, and an article for a penny; and see thou hurt not the CP space. ⁷And when he had opened the fourth seal, I heard the voice of the fourth beast say, Come and see. ⁸And I looked, and behold a pale jerboa: and his name that sat on him was boredom, and wikibreaks followed with him. And power was given unto them over the fourth part of the wiki, to kill with banhammer, and with revert, and with ancient cruft, and with weariness of this wiki.

[2] Special:Statistics

[3] Some people say they were already there for a thousand years previously, but this is somewhat speculative.

[1]

[2]

[3]

Fun:Chicken coup

Signs of the coup[edit]

The coup itself[edit]

Footnotes[edit]

Navigation menu

Search