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Fun:Conservapedia, The Musical/Lenski
(To the tune of “Memory,” from Cats)
Midnight
Andy lurks in his basement
There he broods about Lenski:
He is brooding alone
In the lamplight
He reads evolution’s occurred in the lab
And then he begins to moan
“Lenski!
You’re so evil in my sight!
How I long for the old days
‘Ere this “science” began,
I remember
The time I knew what happiness was
Let the memory live again
Conservapedia’s elite,
To them I’ll sound a warning!
Asassination
Of his reputation
Yes! Now
My plan is forming!
Data!
Give me all of your figures!
Though I’ve not read your paper,
Still I’ll never give in!
If you don’t, then
We’ll harass and intimidate you
And we’ll do it ‘til we win
We know more about the truth
Then Darwinist believers:
Give us your cultures,
Or we’ll lurk like vultures
And call you a deceiver!
You’ll see! Or my name isn’t Schlafly!
I’ll defeat Dr. Lenski,
And I’ll crow when I’ve won!
I’ll claim victory
Regardless of how foolish it is:
Look, a new rant has begun!