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Every year, the world and its system have a day set aside (October 31st) to celebrate ungodly images and evil characters (...) God inspired us to encourage Christians to use this day as an opportunity to spread the gospel.

Jesusween (or Jesus Ween) is the etymologically egregious name of a movement in the United States and Canada designed to inject Christian evangelism into the increasingly godless holiday of Halloween. Someone really ought to have explained to them that "Hallowe'en" (also known as "Allhalloween") is Scots for "All Hallows' Eve" (when the very Christian[2] feast day of All Saints traditionally began),[3] not "Hallo, ween!". What the hell do they think a "ween" is?![4]


The primary goal is for kids who come trick or treating to your door to be met not necessarily with candy and/or money but salvation, possibly in the form of a free Bible. Also children being indoctrinated brought up in fundy families will be handing out free bibles on October 31st.[5] You can identify members of the movement easily on Nov. 1st, as their trees are typically covered in toilet paper.

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  1. Jesus Ween!
  2. As wisely pointed out on a Wikipedia talk page: "Remember that the pagans were really creeped out by widespread Christian practices like veneration of relics, boneyards, sleeping in coffins, and other m[e]mento mori practices that were generally more popular among Christians than pagans. [...] Christians were in some respects the subcultural goths of the ancient world." The irony could not be more hilarious.
  3. Maybe they knew that and intentionally put it as "Jesus wed evening", we can't really tell.
  4. A band? or a penis
  5. [1]