Essay:Poison is the best Medicine

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Warning: Satire.

Thank you for buying Granny's Arsenic Magic Cure Tablets.

The detoxing healing wonders of arsenic. Arsenic is a shiny metallic material. It's naturally found in the earth. Humans have been using arsenic for medicinal use for hundreds of years. Arsenic comes in three colors: yellow, black with grey being the most popular. Recommended by 9 in 10 naturopaths.

Usage[edit]

Use Dosage
Infants (0-2) 0.0001mg, once a day
Children (3-15) 0.002mg, twice a day
Adults (16+) 0.005mg, twice a day

Childhood diseases[edit]

Disobedient children may need a higher dose for Granny's Arsenic Magic Cure Tablets to truly cleanse your child of toxins causing unruly behavior. It is advised that children damaged by autism, ADHD, and vaccines take lead homeopathic pills in addition to Granny's Arsenic Magic Cure Tablets.

Note[edit]

If you or your child feels ill while taking Granny's Arsenic Magic Cure Tablets, don't worry that's the feeling of your body combating toxins. It's like a fever, your body heats up to fight infections. Bacteria can only multiply at body temperature, they quite literally can't handle the heat. By taking Granny's Arsenic Magic Cure Tablets, your body can now repel nasty toxins.

FAQ[edit]

Isn't arsenic toxic?[edit]

That's only a lie spread by big pharma for profits. Arsenic is naturally found in groundwater in many parts of the world, unlike toxic chemicals cooked up in a lab. It's not poisonous, it's safe.

How to order?[edit]

Search "Granny's Arsenic Magic Cure Tablets" on Amazon.com for dozens of suppliers.

Help. It worked but now my child appears to have regressed back.[edit]

Continuous use of Granny's Arsenic Magic Cure Tablets is necessary to maintain good health in vaccine-damaged children. Unfortunately the vaccine injection has somehow created a toxin creating nano factory inside many vaccine-damaged children. Regression is to be expected but with continuous treatment, the nano factory can be counteracted.

Reviews[edit]

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Child Abuser Anonymous

"My child is now autism free thanks to the Arsenic Cure. Thank you so much."

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Why Just Why

"My doctors said my cancer couldn't be cured. They left me to die. I was utterly distraught. All the chemotherapy has done nothing but toxify my body. I needed something. I was desperate. I tried the tablets but hopefully they're working? Just maybe? Thank you for giving me hope."

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Bot

"Fantastic Wonddfful CURE. Work very good. Highly recommend."

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Another Bot

"Great Amzing TREATMENT. Work extremely well. Very recommend."