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Fun:Andy's Evening

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Andy's Evening[edit]

Thunder echoed in the distance, the starless sky portraying a seemingly impenetrable darkness, broken only occasionally by a blinding flash. The weather, however, was the last thing on Andy Schlafly's mind. The day had been long and tedious, all day Andy had been focusing on an upcoming event, his riches to riches story. The long day had passed, Andy was able to rest. Sitting back in his chair, he allowed his aching muscles to slacken as he finally allowed himself to relax.


Allowing his robe to slowly slip to the floor, Andy's thoughts turned to the recent slip-up by a Democratic congressman. As he enjoyed the peace of the moment, Andy felt himself grow tired. The long day had taken its toll, it was finally time to sleep. Andy's dreams of white clouds and warm, loving light evaporated as he woke suddenly. Carefully stepping over TK, so as to not wake the sleeping sentry at the foot of his bed, he left the room. Having reached his study, Andy picked up the phone and muttered his salutation. As Andy was informed of the situation that had unfolded in his absence, his blood began to boil. Without so much as a farewell, Andy slammed the phone down and made haste to his computer. The liberal vandals were at it again, adding facts to Conservapedia's prized articles. " Liberal chickenhawk!" he yelled at the top of his lungs, startling the neighbors.


His eyes watering from the brightness of the screen, Andy quickly redirected his browser away from an intriguing e-mail from a Nigerian prince offering some financial assistance to Conservapedia, and toward Conservapedia's contaminated article. As the article loaded, Andy's pupils shrank to specks, his glasses started to fog up as pure rage shows on his face. After immediately reverting the changes, Andy opened the talk page and prepared to make a strong case against the alterations.


After much thought and careful wording, Andy posted his response to the previous editor of his article:

' "Anonymous User" (obviously not your real name), you have free will to deny logic. I've responded to your concerns and answered your questions and you fail to mention what you find most inspiring about Columbus, such as his independent thinking, so clearly you're a second generation atheist. Your atheistic worldview has led you to deny that conservative talk radio stops insanity. Observation and logic dictate that the defining view of an evolutionist is his disdain for the Bible, despite its indisputable role as the most influential book, both in history and today. Please learn her by contributing to encyclopedic entries, rather than simply ranting and awaiting a response. --aschlafly 00:28, 26 March 2025 (UTC)'

Still not satisfied, Andy decided to ban the user for their insubordination. Cackling to himself, he clicked the Ban button and smiled widely as the log showed:

Aschlafly (Talk|Contribs) blocked AmesG with an expiry time of Until the rapture (account creation disabled, e-mail blocked) (Liberal point-pushing)


Having defeated reality and its liberal bias, Andy knew his blog was safe again. Thanks to Andy's vigilant efforts, Conservapedians continued to wallow in their ignorance. Things were back to normal.

The End