Fun:Conservapedia, The Musical/Moody

By caius (tailor), a big fan of Ruddigore

Very Bad Lyrics Written By Someone With No Talent

Chorus is a chorus of homeschoolers.

• TK: Oh, why am I crazy and bad?
• Chorus: Can't guess!
• TK: And why am I insane and a cad?
• Chorus: Confess!
• TK: Because I am thoroughly MAD!
• Chorus: Oh yes �
• TK:You'll see it at once in my face. Oh, why am I dumb as a horse?
• Chorus: Ah, why?
• TK: It's the beating of puppies, of course.
• Chorus: Fie, fie!
• TK: I do it without much remorse!
• Chorus: Oh my!
• TK:At least that is so in my case!

• TK:When your lies you have fully deployed
• Chorus: Like you �
• TK:As a sysop you'll soon be employed
• Chorus: It do.
• TK: But my penalty none can avoid!
• Chorus: How true!
• TK:I would like a nice-looking youth (stage direction - eyes Bethany).... But like Zeus' own thunderbolt!
• Chorus: (explaining to each other) No dice...
• TK:I rush at those stupid old dolts!
• Chorus: (explaining to each other) That's vice!
• TK:Observe the unpleasant results! (stage direction - random liberal collapses, screaming)
• Chorus: Not nice.
• TK:Indeed, I rarely tell the truth!

• TK:Oh, innocent Ed Poor, just in time!
• Ed, joining Chorus: That's me!
• TK:If I had played along longer, I'm sure
• Chorus: Like me �
• TK:I should be as empowered as you're!
• Chorus: May be.
• TK:You are very well-powered indeed... Oh, innocents, listen in time!
• Chorus: We doe,
• TK:Avoid an existence of crime!
• Chorus: Just so!
• TK:Or you'll be as ugly as I'm!
• Chorus: (loudly) No! No!
• TK:And now, Andy's work, I'll impede.

Original Lyrics

• SIR DESPARD: Oh, why am I moody and sad?
• CHORUS: Can't guess!
• SIR DESPARD: And why am I guiltily mad?
• CHORUS: Confess!
• SIR DESPARD: Because I am thoroughly bad!
• CHORUS: Oh yes �
• SIR DESPARD:You'll see it at once in my face. Oh, why am I husky and hoarse?
• CHORUS: Ah, why?
• SIR DESPARD: It's the workings of conscience, of course.
• CHORUS: Fie, fie!
• SIR DESPARD: And huskiness stands for remorse,
• CHORUS: Oh my!
• SIR DESPARD:At least it does so in my case!
• SIR DESPARD:When in crime one is fully employed �
• CHORUS: Like you �
• SIR DESPARD:Your expression gets warped and destroyed:
• CHORUS: It do.
• SIR DESPARD:It's a penalty none can avoid;
• CHORUS: How true!
• SIR DESPARD:I once was a nice-looking youth; But like stone from a strong catapult �
• CHORUS: (explaining to each other) A trice �
• SIR DESPARD:I rushed at my terrible cult �
• CHORUS: (explaining to each other) That's vice �
• SIR DESPARD:Observe the unpleasant result!
• CHORUS: Not nice.
• SIR DESPARD:Indeed I am telling the truth!

• SIR DESPARD:Oh, innocent, happy though poor!
• CHORUS: That's we �
• SIR DESPARD:If I had been virtuous, I'm sure �
• CHORUS: Like me �
• SIR DESPARD:I should be as nice-looking as you're!
• CHORUS: May be.
• SIR DESPARD:You are very nice-looking indeed! Oh, innocents, listen in time �
• CHORUS: We doe,
• SIR DESPARD:Avoid an existence of crime �
• CHORUS: Just so�
• SIR DESPARD:Or you'll be as ugly as I'm�
• CHORUS: (loudly) No! No!
• SIR DESPARD:And now, if you please, we'll proceed.