Fun:Jinx baiting/Schukky

Throughout the history of Jinx Baiting, there have been several well known and very famous Schukkys, including the Big Ethel "I'm better than this" Schukky in 1882 (lasting 28 minutes), the Little Ethel (Big Ethel's daughter) "I wanna go home" speech of 1915 (7.5 minutes) and the infamous "Don't you fucking look at me" Schukky of unknown origin in 1967. However, all of these pale in comparison to the current internationally certified Jinx (Jason) and his ability to spew complex, blindingly incoherent Shukkys at random moments with practically no notice. This page serves as a shrine to some of the better Shukky's induced in the modern age.

September 2008

On a cold morning in September, history was made as the man who broke the Jinx Baiting color barrier, SirChuckB, while representing Rationalwiki in the Rocky Mountain division, became the first black man to induce a full Schukky. Fighting him all the way, the Jinx restrained itself through several rounds. It was getting angry, but managed to keep its cool. After attempting many well known tactics, Chuck changed tactics and turned to a new subject, previously untouched in modern competition: Racism. Through skillful invoking of racism and using the ingenious device of white sheets and hoods, SirChuckB shattered the Jinx's defenses and induced what will forever be known as the "I'm not racist, so Fuck off" Schukky

You're a glutton for punishment, aren't you? It's interesting to note that no one else is coming to your defense like people here usually do for each other.
The profanity and childish insults are simply my attempt to come down to your level and communicate with you. If I didn't do that, I fear you would not be able to keep up. You're already having a lot of trouble doing that as it is. Fuck off.
Ah, yes. The old "it was a joke" defense after being handed your ass on a silver platter. See, I knew the difference between the two. You obviously didn't until my post. Fuck off.
Monty Python? Honestly, is that the best you have? Massive fail. Fuck off.
No, I actually didn't see a black man yesterday. Not in person anyway. I saw lots of black people at the RNC on TV, though. You know what DIDN'T go through my mind at the time? "Hey, there's a black person! And another! And yet another! Boy, there are a lot of black people at the RNC!" That's because I don't look at people like you do, you black racist prick. Fuck off.
Oh, right. "You people" isn't racist all the time unless it's used by a conservative that you've condemned with absolutely zero proof as "a known racist" - even when it's obviously used in reference to a group with no regard to their racial make-up. And then I fucking obviously taunt and bait you by using the phrase you've got your candy-ass panties all in a bunch over AND YOU FALL FOR IT! Priceless! Absolutely priceless! Fuck off.
>>>YOU<<< REFERRED TO >>>YOURSELF<<< AS "THE BLACK GUY," YOU FUCKING RETARDED JACKASS!!! >>>YOU<<< BROUGHT IT UP, YOU HYPOCRITICAL DICKWEED!!! Again, I taunted and baited you and you once again fell for it exactly like I knew you would. I was sitting there typing "Mr. Black Guy" and was thinking "Watch him complain about me calling him what he just called himself." Predictable as always. Fuck off.
I've no desire to wear any white sheets or hoods. The KKK is as disgusting as racist hypocrites like yourself, Mr. Black Guy. Man, you people make me sick. Fuck off.
Obviously, conversation between three 3-year-olds would be too advanced for you. Your brain has obviously been fried by too much booze, dope and/or weed. Fuck off.
Oh, and fuck off. Jinx 5 September 2008

For his historic role, SirChuckB was awarded the full 89 13/37ths points (52 for luring the Jinx, 37 13/37 for the Schukky) for Rationalwiki and will be given the highest honor in Jinx Baiting, the Golden Hexagon (which is being redone in Platinum, those black people love Platinum). He is also being treated to a dinner of fried chicken and watermelon by the national Jinx Baiting Association. It should be noted that, despite the historic moment, the Republican party team has already filed an official protest claiming that this Jinx is much to easy to taunt and that SirChuckB was only on the team because of Affirmative Action. After a review, the council overturned the protest and declared the Shukky valid. The Republican team was fined and suspended from active competition for 6 months for race baiting. SirChuckB was announced as a new inductee into the Jinx Baiting hall of fame for 2010. He will be the first active baiter to receive such an honor.

September 2009

It took nearly a year, but Jason the Jinx was finally beaten again during the final test match between Australia and New Zealand. The series was tied, but Australia was ahead on aggregate score; however the match was not going their way. With RationalWiki down the Aussies were unlikely to be able to bait the Jinx in to their territory and induce a Schukky - it looked like certain victory for the Kiwis. It was at this point the Australian captain Π made the most controversial decision in trans-Tasman sporting history since the infamous underarm bowl. He decided to induce a Schukky in the neutral territory.

Schukkys in the neutral territory are rare at the first class level as a Jinx usually has to be near its taunters in order to Schukky. Only six previous Schukkys in the neutral territory have ever been seen in international Jinx Baiting, each time being the result of the Jinx becoming infuriated by an external distraction. This is the first time anyone had ever chosen to do it intentionally.

Π chose the highly unorthodox strategy of voting down the Jinx's blog. It was a laborious process, whilst clearing the browser cookies would allow further voting, only a limited number of votes would be accepted from a single IP address per day. As a result Π had to use all of the several computers he has access to each day to vote down Jinx's blog posts. At first he resisted, simply voting his blogs back up using the same method. The votes went from 5 stars (with only one vote) down to 1 and a half stars, back up to 3 stars and then back down to 2. After struggling for a while the Jinx cracked, firing off the blog post:

To the coward spamming my post ratings with 1-star ratings

It's cute that you have no life. And to do it anonymously! Wow! That takes a lot of class. So keep on wasting your time spamming the ratings and delude yourself into thinking it will ever make a lick of difference. Don't bother actually making an attempt to formulate an intelligent, reasoned response to my posts. We both know that you will only embarrass yourself.

With the Jinx beginning to yield, Π revealed that it was him who had been voting down his blog. The Jinx was clearly upset. Π further taunted Jinx about his treats to report Π to his ISP, the fact that he was kicked off PZ Myers' blog and his weak defence about the moderation on his blog; "[i]t's not censorship, but my approving you [sic] comment for public display depends on what you have to say." He unleashed a torrent of desperate straw clutching that would become known as the "It's called harassment" Schukky

It's called harassment, P[i]-brain. Most ISPs look down on their customers using the service to harass people online.

You need to look up what censorship is. Rejecting certain comments on my blog is no more censorship than telling people they can't say certain things in my home. You are a guest here and as a guest, you have no right to say whatever you want. Since you do not have that right, it is not censorship.

And I should've known you were a PZombie. You clowns love skewing online polls - which are akin to post ratings - as if doing so had any real meaning. How pathetic! William Shatner put it best when he said, "Get a life!"

I still post on Pharyngula from time to time. Have fun trying to guess who I am. And the true irony is that you complain about me "trolling" there (which is defined on Pharyngula as anyone with something of actual intelligence to say), yet you have no problem coming here and doing your own trolling. Wait, no. That's not irony. That's hypocrisy.

Goodbye, Pi.

He then blocked Π from his blog. With the Jinx Schukkying in the neutral territory the match was declared a draw and Australia won the series on points. New Zealand immediately protested the result and refused to go out drinking vodka with the Australian team as is traditional after a draw (not to say they still didn't go out a drink vodka though).

In the following media storm Π was unapologetic, instead placing the blame on the International Jinx Baiting Council. "If we had been given a more resilient Jinx, such as the one we had in Melbourne, this would not have happened. But they chose to give us Jason, on a Galleywhoop which deteriorates as fast as Sydney, a Schukky in the neutral zone is always a possibility." When being questioned about his involvement with PZ Myers he denied any wrong doing. "I only read his blog occasionally, less than once a fortnight. I don't generally read the comments and have never posted there. I had no chance to tamper with the Jinx pre-match." With the upcoming tri-nations one day series and a return series in New Zealand the controversy is not going to subside soon. When contacted, the council refused comment, saying only that they review all matches for possible rule infractions and will certify the results as soon as the process is complete.

See also

• The full game transcript for the "I'm not racist, Fuck off" Schukky can be found here.
• The full game transcript for the "It's called harassment" Schukky can be found here and here.