RationalWiki:Annotated Qur'an/The Clot

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RationalWiki Annotated Qur'an
Sura 96: The Clot
Word-by-word translation
Alternate translations and related tafsirs
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Qur'an 96:1[edit]

Read: In the Name of your Lord who created.

Qur'an 96:1 Notes[edit]

The sky-God created the universe (did he?). This verse is often held by Muslims to be proof of a miracle, with the claim being that Gabriel's command "READ!" rendered the illiterate Muhammad capable of reading and writing (but only the Qur'an): thus, the writing of the Qur'an is a miracle. It seems a little far-fetched that a man who spent most of his life working as a trader would not already be literate, given the need for keeping books and records, and there is support in the Sura and Hadith for the idea that Muhammad knew how to write without Allah's help.

Qur'an 96:2[edit]

Created man from a clot.

Qur'an 96:2 Notes[edit]

And created man not from the demonstrated process of natural selection but with some sticky clotty substance and magic.

Qur'an 96:3[edit]

Read: And your Lord is the Most Generous.

Qur'an 96:3 Notes[edit]

The sky-God feeds believers food and provides them all they need (does he?).

Qur'an 96:4[edit]

He who taught by the pen.

Qur'an 96:4 Notes[edit]

The sky-God made mankind more wise through his revelations of the holy book (did man become more wise?).

Qur'an 96:5[edit]

Taught man what he never knew.

Qur'an 96:5 Notes[edit]

The prophet promised that everything was true and not just fiction (was it?).

Qur'an 96:6[edit]

In fact, man oversteps all bounds.

Qur'an 96:6 Notes[edit]

Pesky humans simply won't take ranting people with extraordinary claims at their word when such prophets try to change their entire world view.

Qur'an 96:7[edit]

When he considers himself exempt.

Qur'an 96:7 Notes[edit]

Pesky humans think they somehow deserve to have a rational independent mind free to question everything. Can you think of anything more grotesque?

Qur'an 96:8[edit]

But to your Lord is the return.

Qur'an 96:8 Notes[edit]

When you die you will rot it agony in the subterranean torture chamber or dance with teddy-bears in the sky (will we?).

Qur'an 96:9[edit]

Have you seen him who prevents?

Qur'an 96:9 Notes[edit]

Pesky humans give their own opinion about unstable people ranting their prophecies with their stubborn critical minds and pugnacious expectation of proof!

Qur'an 96:10[edit]

A servant when he prays?

Qur'an 96:10 Notes[edit]

All people forced to pray are slaves.

Qur'an 96:11[edit]

Do you think he is upon guidance?

Qur'an 96:11 Notes[edit]

We aren't mind readers. Only the sky-God can magically spy on and know every single thought by every single rational subject.

Qur'an 96:12[edit]

Or advocates righteousness?

Qur'an 96:12 Notes[edit]

Total submission is nothing but a good thing.

Qur'an 96:13[edit]

Do you see how he disbelieved and turned away?

Qur'an 96:13 Notes[edit]

Pesky stubborn people are often evil trouble makers.

Qur'an 96:14[edit]

Does he not know that God sees?

Qur'an 96:14 Notes[edit]

The sky-God is an enormous surveillance machine and is always watching (is he?).

Qur'an 96:15[edit]

No. If he does not desist, We will drag him by the forelock.

Qur'an 96:15 Notes[edit]

In the name of peace we will show this pesky man of evil the violence he deserves.

Qur'an 96:16[edit]

A deceitful, sinful forelock.

Qur'an 96:16 Notes[edit]

Why can't the pesky clot of evil swallow every single thing we tell him?

Qur'an 96:17[edit]

Let him call on his gang.

Qur'an 96:17 Notes[edit]

Non believers all have secret mafia troops who are ready to come to their aid the moment people try to force their world view onto them.

Qur'an 96:18[edit]

We will call the Guards.

Qur'an 96:18 Notes[edit]

The mafia is made up of satanic creatures from the subterranean torture chambers.

Qur'an 96:19[edit]

No, do not obey him; but kneel down, and come near.

Qur'an 96:19 Notes[edit]

The loving compassionate forgiving sky-tyrant asks just for the slightest favour of total absolute submission...or else...no more mister nice sky-God!