User:Dr Dot

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Dr. Dot is a legendary net.presence, shit disturber, all-around asshole, and generally foul sort of person. He has been known to delight in making babies cry (it's been told he has this 'thing' for pacifiers), annoying fundamentalists of any stripe ("Christ, fundies. They're all the same, whether they're christian, islamic, or wiccan", said at a wiccan book store after the tirade of a particularly mephitic wiccan 'priestess' had just completed), self-proclaimed "Militant, Radical Moderate", contaminator of spammer's databases.

Background[edit]

Dr. Dot is an escapee from the People's Republic of California. Dr. Dot finally escaped the insane asylum[1] in 1996 and settled in God's Country[2], where he has honed the art of fucking with the mentally ill[3][4], engaging in scientific debate with such notables as Gene_Ray, and engaging in other such shennanighans as he deems fit. A long association with usenet has had a definite effect on his personality[citation needed], causing such symptoms as Extreme Apathy[5] and the strong desire to commit random acts of General Aviation[6].

Achievements[edit]

Some of his more notable achievements:

  • Nearly starting a riot in Downtown San Jose, Ca., for pointing out the silliness of protesting a church putting up a Christmas Nativity Scene on their own property, and that their continued protestations will only make them look like Crazy Liberal Screechbags.
  • Successfully starting a flame war between the following newsgroups:
    • alt.baldspot
    • alt.aviation.bill-mulcahey.screech.babble.drool
    • alt.ketchup
    • alt.beer
    • talk.bizarre
    • alt.peeves
    • alt.flame
    • alt.tasteless
    • rec.arts.anime
  • Along with the local Pastafarian church, successfully petitioned the California School Board to include Pastafarianism and Rutabuggary[7] to have both philosophies included in their teachings of Object Oriented Programming and the Paradigms of Garbage Collection[8]
  • Was notorious for taking the ill-spelled screeds of the 'New Generation'[9] and returning them unanswered and in public with all spelling and grammar errors noted. Grades were given, though it was a very rare instance indeed for any paper to be returned with a grade above D.

More achievements[edit]

  • Twice divorced, managed to keep the house both times
  • Private Pilot
  • Public nuisance
  • Successfully petitioned to be removed from the Georgia State Sex Offender's Database on the following grounds:
    • Nobody believed that someone with a bad back could do such things to a moose and not get stomped and gored
    • Bulldogs really ARE that ugly to begin with
    • Broccoli can not run for congress
    • Windows NT!
    • The perinium does not cause periodontal disease, in spite of their similar sounding names
    • Lime Jello stains are not easily removed from the living room carpet, regardless of what the cheery, chipper bimbo on TV wants you to believe.
    • There is no such thing as 00 buck bailin' wire.
    • Duct tape CAN fix that permanently.
  • Came up with an algorithm that made Bruce Schneier go "Wow. I never thought of that."
  • Has never run for public office, in spite of the astronomical odds.
  • Succeeded in uniting the Religious Right and the Evil Communist Liberals.[10]

Current Annoyances[11][edit]

  • The security theater that passes as our Government[12] turning the United States into a dictatorship that would make Stalin green with envy. Gotta do something that makes them look like they're doing more than groping at good looking ladies' undergarments.
  • That Rational Wiki doesn't have the Tex binaries installed. A good deal of the scientific facts come to us in the form of calculus[13].
  • Security theater will only increase as the political theater that passes[14] for political discourse in the United States continues.

See Also[edit]

  • work in progress

References[15][edit]

  1. http://www.wikipedia.org/California
  2. http://www.wikipedia.org/Atlanta
  3. http://www.wikipedia.org/us_congress
  4. http://www.timecube.com
  5. Sponsored by Red Bull, and shown on ESPN2 during the summer.
  6. http://www.aopa.org
  7. the religious belief that sweet BBQ sauce is preferred in the eyes of The Creator than the abomination of Vinegar based BBQ sauce (An Abomination In His Eyes (when slathered on The Ribs of Life)) to include both sects, along with Intelligent Design, in the teaching of compiler design at UC Berkeley. Stanford University had no comment, but it was reported shortly after that their curriculum involving the design of the Java Garbage Collector system would include both philosophies.
  8. as dictated by Leviticus 11:421 (PBUH)
  9. do NOT get me started
  10. References can be supplied upon request and pending location of the survivors, if any.
  11. Subject to change at any time
  12. Or, more specifically, the TSA goons at http://www.tsa.gov
  13. proof that God has a wicked sense of humor and likes to take it out on geeky white boys
  14. allegedly
  15. See also: http://www.wikipedia.org/recursion