RationalWiki:Annotated Qur'an/The Constellations

From RationalWiki
Jump to: navigation, search
Annotated Qur'an
Sura 85: The Constellations
Word-by-word translation
Alternate translations and related tafsirs
Alternate translations
Previous sura Following sura


Qur'an 85:1[edit]

By the sky with the constellations.

Qur'an 85:1 Notes[edit]

The creator arranged stars not through the laws of physics and random distribution but how they would appear to people during a few centuries on a tiny planet. Obviously.

Qur'an 85:2[edit]

And by the Promised Day.

Qur'an 85:2 Notes[edit]

By this they mean the day you go to the happy cloud place or the underground torture chamber.

Qur'an 85:3[edit]

And by the witness and the witnessed.

Qur'an 85:3 Notes[edit]

By this they mean the angels who spy on you and you the faliable human who was spied on.

Qur'an 85:4[edit]

Destroyed were the People of the Trench.

Qur'an 85:4 Notes[edit]

Can you believe that some of the first devout muslims (the people of the trench) who defied their opressors and held onto their belief in Allah the compassionate, were thrown into a ditch and set on fire. I mean, what kind of humans would torture other humans with fire. It is beyond barbaric. Even being on fire for a few minutes is agonising and very cruel. Luckily a compassionate kind God in the sky would never ever let humans burn by fire, even for just a few moments.

Qur'an 85:5[edit]

The fire supplied with fuel.

Qur'an 85:5 Notes[edit]

As if burning wasn't bad enough the humans made the fire hotter and hotter. It's difficult to believe how anyone could treat people like that.

Qur'an 85:6[edit]

While they sat around it.

Qur'an 85:6 Notes[edit]

Can you believe that an audience comes out to watch a public execution?

Qur'an 85:7[edit]

And were witnessing what they did to the believers.

Qur'an 85:7 Notes[edit]

and that they stood by watching the public murder of people and doing nothing?

Qur'an 85:8[edit]

They begrudged them only because they believed in God the Almighty, the Praiseworthy.

Qur'an 85:8 Notes[edit]

Luckily public executions are a thing of the past in the Middle East.

Qur'an 85:9[edit]

To Whom belongs the sovereignty of the heavens and the earth. God is witness over everything.

Qur'an 85:9 Notes[edit]

The famed mass surveillance system.

Qur'an 85:10[edit]

Those who tempt the believers, men and women, then do not repent; for them is the punishment of Hell; for them is the punishment of Burning.

Qur'an 85:10 Notes[edit]

Oh wait. Maybe it is moral to burn people after all.

Qur'an 85:11[edit]

Those who believe and do righteous deeds will have Gardens beneath which rivers flow. That is the great triumph.

Qur'an 85:11 Notes[edit]

Especially if the others get to enjoy pleasure for eternity.

Qur'an 85:12[edit]

The onslaught of your Lord is severe.

Qur'an 85:12 Notes[edit]

The kind loving forgiving merciful God can be just a little over-dramatic with his systematic eternal torture.

Qur'an 85:13[edit]

It is He who begins and repeats.

Qur'an 85:13 Notes[edit]

No...that's not like the eternal cycle of the Hindus.

Qur'an 85:14[edit]

And He is the Forgiving, the Loving.

Qur'an 85:14 Notes[edit]

An unforgiving and non-loving God would add sulfuric acid to the eternal fires, luckily for the damned the sky God is not that sadistic.

Qur'an 85:15[edit]

Possessor of the Glorious Throne.

Qur'an 85:15 Notes[edit]

The most great perfect being needs a throne so that everyone will bow to him and fulfil his need of praise, power and mightiness.

Qur'an 85:16[edit]

Doer of whatever He wills.

Qur'an 85:16 Notes[edit]

And he is pretty active for a few hundred years and then disappears for a very long nap.

Qur'an 85:17[edit]

Has there come to you the story of the legions?

Qur'an 85:17 Notes[edit]

Most of us hadn't even heard of this story until they were adults.

Qur'an 85:18[edit]

Of Pharaoh and Thamood?

Qur'an 85:18 Notes[edit]

No, most people have no idea what that is.

Qur'an 85:19[edit]

In fact, those who disbelieve are in denial.

Qur'an 85:19 Notes[edit]

Especially people in Southern Africa who have never heard of Allah. Their non-belief in something they know nothing about...is a classic case of denial.

Qur'an 85:20[edit]

And God encloses them from beyond.

Qur'an 85:20 Notes[edit]

And for the sin of not believing in something no one tries to sell them...the loving compassionate God will make them burn.

Qur'an 85:21[edit]

In fact, it is a Glorious Quran.

Qur'an 85:21 Notes[edit]

This book full of long descriptions of agonising torture, fearful trembling, scary tyrants, draconian laws...are nothing but sweet beautiful poetry.

Qur'an 85:22[edit]

In a Preserved Tablet.

Qur'an 85:22 Notes[edit]

A text that has never changed since it was first spoken out loud and travelled by word then written down years later. It is as unchangeable as a Hollywood rumor!