Template:Trollresponse

@John Doe I don't know if you will read this in full, but I'll write it here nonetheless, since I have a day off work... Are you feeling fine? No no, don't roll your eyes at your screen, I'm not being snarky. It's rare that a day goes by when you don't come along to post something here to troll us. Why? Out of all the things you could be doing, like reading a book, playing a game, watching a movie/cat video or going for a run, why in the name of Goat do you feel the need to sit down, find some random link and post it here? It just seems... boring to me. The act is not visually engaging. It doesn't make a pleasant sound when you hit that "save" button. Nobody here actually cares. True, some of my mates will look and roll their eyes, but of the dozens of people who will see your material 99.9% won't even stop for a second to glance at your stuff.Now you are thinking to yourself: "But, but I made you guys ANGRY! Isn't that fun?!" Well, nobody is angry. We just feel mildly sad... "AHA! So I did trigger you snowflakes!!!!!!111!!!SHIFT1!!SHIFToneeleventyone11!!!1!" No my friend, we don't feel sad because we were "destroyed" in a Ben Shapiro-esque manner by your logic and irrefutable, high-quality, trusworthy sources. We feel sad because every time you post here, we are reminded that there is someone out there in this world who is feeling alone and angry and that there is nothing we can do to help them. EVERY TIME I see one of your posts I feel like I have let you down stranger, because maybe there was something that I could have done to help you. Something to cheer you up in your boredom or your sadness; something to alleviate the crushing sense of loneliness and despair you are feeling every time you sit down in front of your computer to troll others. I look out my window and see the people right now, chatting with their friends, kissing their girlfriends, walking their dogs, taking their kids to school, and I know that you aren't one of those people {{{1}}}, I just know you aren't. Because if you did have friends who wanted to be near you, a certain someone who loved you, children you needed to care for, or just someplace fun to be, then the idea of trolling others on a wiki nobody reads wouldn't have been anywhere near the top of your to-do list. I am genuinely sorry I couldn't help you. Sincerely. The end. And I know you probably hate me right now; but I don't hate you back. Maybe at some other time I would, but I just can't find it in me right now. Goatspeed, {{{1}}}. - [4 tildes here]

Description

A copypasta template for quickly responding to the n-teenth trollpost from that one persistent little bugger. Ripped off from an actual RW:BAR comment by Rairyu.

Usage

To use it, type: {{subst:trollresponse|[troll username/IP here]|~~~~}}. Try to autoexpand, as then it will look more real to the problem user.

See also

• {{Srstroll}}