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Suggestions as to what Christian conservatives can do if they really want classroom prayer[edit]

  1. Promote school officials trained in most[1] religions to lead prayers in several religions.
  2. Such training would have to account for the beliefs of atheists and agnostics. Make up stuff for them to pray with, just in case the teachers have a different worldview than the child in question.
  3. Invent devices[2] that will allow schoolchildren to pray aloud without interfering with each other, while still being able to listen to what the teacher actually is trying to teach outside the prayer time.
  4. If, of course, all above options are weighed in the balance and found wanting, Christian conservatives are cordially invited to get bent.

Once all of these are achieved, present the case to the Supreme Court for review. Now that secular people are included, the policy has a secular purpose. All of this, of course, is limited by the question of how valuable prayer is if it isn't spontaneously offered out of a free and willing heart. But perhaps Christian fundamentalists find this a technicality and see the point of school prayer as the words being said and - more importantly - being heard. Preferably by those who cannot simply go elsewhere.

Once the Supreme Court approves, of course, the policy no longer needs to be implemented as written anyway.[3]

  1. Who knows when the next made-up religion will come by, given that even Scientology has been granted tax-exempt status in the United States?
  2. Like this one, perhaps: [1]. In case mobility is a concern (like gym class), maybe a design more resembling the wireless device as some sort of mandatory surgical implant.
  3. Well, until the ACLU finds out and sues your backend.