Examples of Satan personally killing people
| Light iron-age reading|
|Gabbin' with God|
Killings by Satan
|Fatalities||Crime||Method used||Biblical reference||Notes|
|Sarah, wife of Abraham.||Satan felt that Sarah had been too doubtful of God when she internally laughed at his foretelling of her birthing of Isaac.||Cardiac arrest.||None - it's Church tradition, and as there's no reference, it might not even be a real instance of Satan killing someone||Strictly speaking, this was an inadvertent, rather than intentional, homicide. Even though this Genesis chapter is about Sarah's death, its Hebrew title translates to "Life of Sarah."|
|Job's wife, children, and servants (who were possibly slaves).||Satan thought Job wasn't as good as he looked and when trouble and death came he would renounce his belief so God told him he could test him. God allowed Satan to kill Job's children and servants to test Job in order to see how righteous he was, for no other particular reason, without thinking about the people who died, treating them as merely confiscated possessions.||Slaughter by the Sabeans, lightning strikes, and slaughter by Chaldean raiders.||Job 1:13-22||Again, it was completely condoned, if not ordered, by God, and only for the purpose of their little bet. In this scenario, it is really the equivalent of God killing them himself.|
Other examples would be greatly appreciated - assuming you can find any. We can't!
Erm, that's it
Yep, that's all, possibly the then-second-holiest-human and one guy's wife, kids, and servants, and even those were on a contract basis so God could test Job. A feeble record for the Prince of All Evil™.[note 1] It should be noted here that many theologians don't even identify the Adversary from the Book of Job with Satan — the grammar of the Hebrew lacks the preceding article that would ordinarily identify him as "Ha-Satan", which means The Accuser as opposed to "Satan."; and instead the common view is that the antagonist of Job is another deity, a holdover from polytheistic times. Alternatively, this "Ha-Satan" may be the angel Sammael, whose name means "Venom of God", who acted as God's prosecution lawyer, testing humanity's fidelity to God. Why God would need to test you when allegedly He already knows every fucking thing about you is yet another mystery. Maybe as Satan himself says in The Devil's Advocate, he's a tight-ass and a sadist (great movie by the way).
In fact, chronologically, the Accuser in Job couldn't be Satan who by that time had already rebelled against God shortly after God's creation of Adam and Eve, if John Milton is to be believed at any rate.
And please note that there was only one way that Satan could kill ANY person whomsoever:
Following God's orders Requesting permission from God. According to the Bible, God is the only entity with the power of life and death. Wars, murderers, disasters — these are all considered to be instruments of God. Yet, for some reason, believers tend to blame wars and murders (and sometimes disasters)[note 2]) on the workings of Satan.[note 3]
- Well, Satan is facing tough choices because front-running people's afterlife by killing them isn't exactly an evil deed, from the perspective of an immortal (the effect is simply moving them from one place to another).
- E.g., Pat Robertson's proclamations that certain disasters are brought on by the presence of homosexuality, Mardi Gras, jazz music, etc. (Oh, wait! Maybe disasters actually qualify as the Wrath of God. Or not. It's all so confusing. But, then, God doesn't want us thinking too much about this. That's what faith is for. So, never mind.)
- At least those believers who do not resort to imprecatory prayer
- For those who don't get it, look up Harry Hill.
- Scribblenauts allows you to get God and Satan to fight in Scribblenauts. Try it yourself.
- The Wisdom Books, Robert Alter.
- Bible Fight allows you to take the role of the one and beat the shit out of the other.Protip: complete the tournament to unlock God.