Fun:Atheism
Going One God Further Atheism |
Key Concepts |
Articles to not believe in |
Notable heathens |
Tired of laughing? RationalWiki has a slightly more serious article about Atheism. |
“”I find your lack of faith disturbing...
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—Darth Vader choking a skeptic atheist |
“”The religion of one age is the literary entertainment of the next.
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“”You're basically killing each other to see who's got the better imaginary friend.
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—Richard Jeni |
“”Atheists don't just want to live in a world without god, they want to go to heaven with god and have sex with god and burn all the Bibles and hang them up in the sky like ancient tombs
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—wint but AI, [1] |
Definitions[edit]
Atheism has two main definitions. It is properly defined as:
- The denial of the existence of God while in the midst of full knowledge that God indeed exists. Probably written by Satan too.
- The hatred of God while fully believing in His existence.
Dogma[edit]
There are many facets to atheistic dogma! Here are a few choice high water marks:
- Stealing and eating crackers
- Eating grilled cheese sandwiches, tortillas, and toast even if an image of Richard Dawkins or a goat appears on them[2]
- Eating baby parts from abortion clinics
- Drinking water, even if it's really gross
- Oppressing and suppressing Christians
- Not getting hit by karma
- Having nightmares about bananas and peanut butter
- Hating book lernin'
- Touching walls and worshipping rocks
- Eating cute little babies[3]
- Playing video games and drinking coke[4]
Why atheism is a religion[edit]
- It ends in "-ism"[5]
- They have a community (and it's a well known fact that religion owns community)
- Many of them are very passionate about their movement
- They have an atheist Bible
- They worship Satan
Recipes[edit]
Atheists have long been noted for their superior recipes; this is the leading cause of the rise of atheism, converting millions of believers to atheism.[6]
The Atheist Nightmare[edit]
Crackers taste really good, especially with peanut butter and bananas, and are also quite healthy, so you should not let Christian fantasies about cannibalism inhibit you.
The Dawkins Tortilla[edit]
In order to better worship Lord Dawkins, atheists frequently produce and consume tortillas, in order to bump up the chances that they might better catch glimpse of a really wonky burn on a tortilla His Holy face.
The Aborted Fetus[edit]
Also, to praise their Dark Lord, some atheists also sometimes eat babies, preferably aborted fetuses that are fresh from the abortion clinic, because they hate babies.
External links[edit]
- An Atheist Meets God
- God Loves Atheists
- Hundreds of Proofs of God's Non-existence
- Atheist doctrine
- [1]
Footnotes[edit]
- ↑ @dril_gpt2 Twitter
- ↑ Hunger trumps piety.
- ↑ http://debunkingatheists.blogspot.com/2008/07/atheists-eat-babies.html
- ↑ Young Christian preacher: ‘Atheists drink coke all day and are addicted to video games’ Dead State 8 May 2018
- ↑ https://www.facebook.com/FFAF.International
- ↑ Citation NOT needed.