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PZ Myers has solicited donations of the Eucharist. What should he do with the crackers?
Poll (Multiple votes allowed)[edit]
- Coarb 13:12, 13 July 2008 (EDT)
- Return them to the church
- Eat them, feel remorse, return Jesus-infused poop to church
- As opposed to churchgoers, who hoard Jesus-infused poop for themselves? --Toiretni 13:35, 13 July 2008 (EDT)
- Plant them and grow a new Jesus
- Drive nails through them
- See if he can find someone who can turn 12 other crackers into the Disciples and re-enact that last supper
- Auction them, with proceeds going to provide condoms for Africans
- Coarb 13:18, 13 July 2008 (EDT)
- Tell Jews they're matzo.
- Launch them into orbit to be with their heavenly father.
- Apply for a grant to the Templeton Foundation to establish if they are "just crackers", or if they have any additional physical properties.
- Put them in a glass case, with a note that Jesus could certainly take pieces of his body back if he wished.
- Play checkers
- Send them around the world, like Flat Stanley
- Give them to a crazy anti-Catholic religious group or person, like Jack Chick
- Make a tiny jigsaw puzzle out of each one, jumble all the pieces together, return the whole mess to the church.
- Try to get the state to treat them as medical waste
- Coarb 13:59, 13 July 2008 (EDT)
- Give them to a dissident Catholic group, preferably one whose members have been excommunicated
- Return them to Catholic Holocaust survivors, apologizing for the harm that atheism has done to the world.
- Return them to the church on the condition that Bill Donohue retire from public life.
- Lay them out with a glass of milk on Christmas Eve, then see what Santa Claus leaves in PZ's stocking.
- Eat them with peanut butter, or maybe a slice of banana.
- Bury them on Friday afternoon, see of they rise again by Sunday morning.
- If they do, wait 40 days and see if they ascend into Heaven.
- Throw them off a cliff and see if God catches them.
- When they are 12 years old, take them to a Jewish temple and see if they lecture the rabbis on the torah.
- Better yet, take them to the Vatican and see if they lecture Joey Ratz and his crew on simple human decency.
- Mix them in with non-Jesusfied crackers and play salvation roulette with your friends.
