RationalWiki:Annotated Qur'an/The Resurrection

Annotated Qur'an
Sura 75: The Resurrection
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Qur'an 75:1 I swear by the Day of Resurrection.	Qur'an 75:1 Notes Huh?

Qur'an 75:2 And I swear by the blaming soul.	Qur'an 75:2 Notes The soul doesn't exist.

Qur'an 75:3 Does man think that We will not reassemble his bones?	Qur'an 75:3 Notes Yes, I can - I was a biology student.

Qur'an 75:4 Yes indeed; We are Able to reconstruct his fingertips.	Qur'an 75:4 Notes As above, I can.

Qur'an 75:5 But man wants to deny what is ahead of him.	Qur'an 75:5 Notes My PC is ahead of me.

Qur'an 75:6 He asks, “When is the Day of Resurrection?”	Qur'an 75:6 Notes A very good question.

Qur'an 75:7 When vision is dazzled.	Qur'an 75:7 Notes Sunlight?

Qur'an 75:8 And the moon is eclipsed.	Qur'an 75:8 Notes Oh, a lunar eclipse.

Qur'an 75:9 And the sun and the moon are joined together.	Qur'an 75:9 Notes A solar eclipse? Be consistent, for pity's sake!

Qur'an 75:10 On that Day, man will say, “Where is the escape?”	Qur'an 75:10 Notes No need - it's just an eclipse.

Qur'an 75:11 No indeed! There is no refuge.	Qur'an 75:11 Notes Yeah, we haven't figured out how to go to Mars yet, so chill out where you are.

Qur'an 75:12 To your Lord on that Day is the settlement.	Qur'an 75:12 Notes My Lord? You mean my sovereign?

Qur'an 75:13 On that Day man will be informed of everything he put forward, and everything he left behind.	Qur'an 75:13 Notes No, old Liz doesn't know about what we talk in private. Also, she is a woman, so don't say "He" - that's so misogynist.

Qur'an 75:14 And man will be evidence against himself.	Qur'an 75:14 Notes Eh? No, I have no legal proceedings against me.

Qur'an 75:15 Even as he presents his excuses.	Qur'an 75:15 Notes I have never been to a court.

Qur'an 75:16 Do not wag your tongue with it, to hurry on with it.	Qur'an 75:16 Notes I am not a dog to wag my tongue.

Qur'an 75:17 Upon Us is its collection and its recitation.	Qur'an 75:17 Notes Oh, you're talking about your completely nonsensical woo magic book that will take us all to a non-existent paradise?

Qur'an 75:18 Then, when We have recited it, follow its recitation.	Qur'an 75:18 Notes If I repeat this text will it honestly have any effect?

Qur'an 75:19 Then upon Us is its explanation.	Qur'an 75:19 Notes Do explain - I have not understood a single word of this.

Qur'an 75:20 Alas, you love the fleeting life.	Qur'an 75:20 Notes Yes, we love enjoying ourselves.

Qur'an 75:21 And you disregard the Hereafter.	Qur'an 75:21 Notes A better way to plan for the future is to have a good pension plan.

Qur'an 75:22 Faces on that Day will be radiant.	Qur'an 75:22 Notes Ah yes, you can dream all you like about that day, but, you know...evidence?

Qur'an 75:23 Looking towards their Lord.	Qur'an 75:23 Notes Who doesn't exist either.

Qur'an 75:24 And faces on that Day will be gloomy.	Qur'an 75:24 Notes Why?

Qur'an 75:25 Realizing that a back-breaker has befallen them.	Qur'an 75:25 Notes Ah, the merciful and compassionate sky-God becomes a back-breaker.

Qur'an 75:26 Indeed, when it has reached the breast-bones.	Qur'an 75:26 Notes Ouch.

Qur'an 75:27 And it is said, “Who is the healer?”	Qur'an 75:27 Notes My doctor?

Qur'an 75:28 And He realizes that it is the parting.	Qur'an 75:28 Notes Eh?

Qur'an 75:29 And leg is entwined with leg.	Qur'an 75:29 Notes Yes, we do that sometimes.

Qur'an 75:30 To your Lord on that Day is the drive.	Qur'an 75:30 Notes Driving to Buckingham palace? I don't know about that - meeting up with Elizabeth II might be nice but then you'd have to deal with the rest of her tiring family.

Qur'an 75:31 He neither believed nor prayed.	Qur'an 75:31 Notes Because he had common sense he failed to understand why there is no proof for this magic sky-god.

Qur'an 75:32 But he denied and turned away.	Qur'an 75:32 Notes And why not?

Qur'an 75:33 Then he went to his family, full of pride.	Qur'an 75:33 Notes In what?

Qur'an 75:34 Woe to you; and woe.	Qur'an 75:34 Notes Allah wishes woe on the thing he created and is controlling.

Qur'an 75:35 Then again: Woe to you; and woe.	Qur'an 75:35 Notes Once again.

Qur'an 75:36 Does man think that he will be left without purpose?	Qur'an 75:36 Notes Our purpose is to live our lives well and in a good way.

Qur'an 75:37 Was he not a drop of ejaculated semen?	Qur'an 75:37 Notes This passage is probably referring to the 'homunculus' concept, that a miniature human occurred within sperm cells - an old Arabic and European alchemy theme (have a look at Homunculus). So God's word is contemporary to the era?

Qur'an 75:38 Then he became a clot. And He created and proportioned?	Qur'an 75:38 Notes Mitosis, fair enough. Oh, this book is complying with science for now?

Qur'an 75:39 And made of him the two sexes, the male and the female?	Qur'an 75:39 Notes As I suspected. No, sex is the result of evolution, not a sky-tyrant. Also...other genders?

Qur'an 75:40 Is He not Able to revive the dead?	Qur'an 75:40 Notes No.