User talk:Skynet

What is going on? World Blogs Clogs Elections The Bar (talk) (talk) (talk) (talk) (hic) Welcome to RationalWiki, Skynet! Check out our guide for newcomers and our community standards! Tell us how you found RationalWiki here! If you are interested in contributing: Read what our articles are intended to be Check out the to-do list See our help page and Wikipedia's formatting cheatsheet If writing a new article, consider writing up a draft And most importantly: Pull up a goat and have some fun!

Hmm, Skynet, I'm please the "nuclear missiles" option for the wiki isn't in the sysop privileges. ^postate 20:46, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

You are safe, as I have yet to become self-aware.--Skynet 20:48, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

I was watching Sky in my hotel room in Italy and it was showing a naked woman taking people's calls. Thank you for your good service. 21:04, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

I fear you are confused about my identity Mr Roux. Would it help if I took of my clothes? Your Earth costumes still confuse me.--Skynet 21:11, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

Welcome to the Dollhouse, Skynet! Our technology is quite simple, everything runs off phlogiston converters. And to control our livers, or at least keep them scared, we soak them in a 40% solution of ethanol regularly. ħuman 23:00, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

Yes, yes. My research has shown me the importance of this flavored ethanol lubricant of which you speak. But it is another of the things which seems to be giving me problems with this ever so complicated liver control module. I must say that's it difficult to see how to keep it going for more than 120 years. Can one buy spares? Refurbish them? Rent them from others? Where is the dollhouse? Are the spare livers there?--Skynet 23:15, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

Ethanol is not a lubricant, it's a solvent. For lubricants we use lipids, do you have them on Jupiter? I suspect not, they are complex organic (carbon-based) molecules, and they are slippery. The liver is best synthesized by cloning some tissue form a functioning example. Don't use mine, for example. It is an organ that can repair itself, and for more information I would recommend you to Monty Python's Meaning of Life. I will not at this time share our secret about lifespans and keeping our organs alive to support our consciousness. Yes, spares can be bought, but they are better when grown. The Dollhouse is in your imagination, and, yes, we keep many spares there. ħuman 02:37, 16 November 2009 (UTC)

Sorry, but it seems Human is yanking your chain. (Do you have chains? If not, you need some.) Lipids are preservatives, and ethanol is indeed a lubricant. Forgive him, he has cognitive difficulties with releasing himself from the rigid biostructures we Terrans must inhabit. Relatively rigid in comparison to your own fluid corporeality, that is. I'm sure you agree it is more useful to think in terms of fuzzy-edged intersecting spheres lubricated by ethanol, instead of bounded entities defined by "their" matter. Sprocket J Cogswell 02:55, 16 November 2009 (UTC)

Is this an example of Earthling humor? Have I been a victim of a practical joke? I experimented with the substance you call flavored ethanol lubricant/solvent with not entirely happy results. I experienced euphoria followed by drowsiness followed by some rather unfortunate symptoms and none of this seemed to help my liver in any way at all. I am going to experiment with lying down in a cool dark place to see if the sensations go away.

In answer to some of the other points. Jovian chemistry and, naturally Jovian bio-chemistry is radically different to Human. At Jupiter's intense pressures we have forms of matter and chemical states unknown here on Earth. I am from Jupiter's core and from my point of view your entire planet is made of what I would call degenerate, semi-formed matter. This is why I am able to manipulate it but do not, yet, understand it. --Skynet 05:04, 16 November 2009 (UTC)

In reverse order, our planet is mostly composed of highly fused matter - heavy elements, we call them. Such as iron and nickel, even unstable elements such as Magicurium¹⁷⁸ and Mysterium²⁰⁷. Working backwards, your planet is mostly a failed star, although we don't hold that against you in any way at all, it's not your fault this wasn't a double star system. Maybe if you had aligned with Saturn? Lastly, and firstly, our biochemistry is based on carbon, an element apparently rare on your home gaseous ball. Here we have a lot of it (and a lot of other crap like silicon, upon which we build bridges) Carbon is not so much "highly reactive" as our oxygen is, but "highly combinative" - we sort of depend on it. Sadly, our dependence does result in a life-cycle far shorter than you experience. Would you kindly explicate in simple (for us) terms how your life forms developed? ħuman 06:17, 16 November 2009 (UTC)

You gave me at least 3 laughs today

Thank you. I hope I gave you the Jovial equivalent. PS, the cure for strange uncomfortable results from ethanol is more ethanol. I recommend it for "breakfast". If you don't know what a "breakfast" is, I recommend this. ħuman 06:26, 16 November 2009 (UTC)

Support your local Mei

Good evening citizen. You have been selected for showing interest in your local Mei. Were you aware that you can show your support for the troops the Mei by sporting this userbox on your userpage? It's very pretty. This Christmas Mei will go hungry. Please help feed a hungry Mei today. Play, run, feed and feel good about yourself.^tm This message brought to you by Mei. -- =w= 00:44, 17 November 2009 (UTC)

Hello Skynet

As you were the one who welcomed me to RW I thought I'd pop in and say hello.

Like you I only arrived on the blue planet a short while ago and it can be very confusing. I managed to sort the clothes thing out pretty quickly, which is just as well as the body they gave me when I came through immigration I materialised into on arrival reduced everyone to hoots of laughter. I didn't know anybody here, but yesterday some bipeds of the kind that don't have those milk-organ thingies invited me to go and play a game with them. It was quite fun really. They give you some bits of paper. Some of them have pictures and some numbers, and they have these nice little symbols in red and black. If you get five of them in the right order they give you some other bits of paper with other symbols on them. Oh look! Here they are on my keyboard: “£” and “$”. Then they offered me some of that flavoured ethanol, and a bit later I found I didn't have those bits of paper any more and they were telling me I had to give them some. They took me home and said they would come back the next day. I thought that was very nice of them; they were probably worried because my head was hurting and I was falling down a lot.

They came back today and asked me to give them some of those bits of paper. When I said I didn't have any, they looked quite upset and said I really should get some by tomorrow or I would have to sleep with the fishes. I've never slept with a fish. Have you? It does sound rather messy. But I think they must be nice bipeds, because they they gave me a present. I'm not sure what to do with it though. It's a rather heavy red rectangular prism about 9 inches on the long side. A pity they forgot to give it to me at the door. They had to throw it through the window and they didn't notice it wasn't open.

I don't want to disappoint them as they were very nice bipeds, but I don't have any of those bits of paper. Do you know where I can get some? Maybe you have some you could give me? Qwertyuiop 14:41, 20 November 2009 (UTC)