Kim Il-sung
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Eternal President Great Leader King Kim Il "Crazypants" Sung (Korean: 김일성), originally born Kim Sŏng-ju (김성주) (15 April 1912–8 July 1994) is the great military leader who single-handedly conquered the Japanese with his bare hands and founded the glorious Democratic People’s Republic of Korea and the inventor of the "Juche" cult ideology,[1] a bizarre variant on Stalinism that borders on unintentional self-parody, including declaring Kim-il Sung to be "Eternal President" of North Korea, effectively making the nation a "necrocracy".
According to official North Korean mythology, Kim Il Sung, the "Great Leader," is immortal, arose from the grave to be with us forever, and lives in the hearts of every Korean, who all bubble over with intense love and adoration toward Him, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. According to everyone else, he was the eldest son of a Christian Japanese Independence activist, who decided to move to the northeast of China (known as Manchuria), where Kim learned Chinese and became interested in communism. After the Mukden Incident (a staged train bombing used as a pretext for the invasion of Manchuria), Kim was once again under Japanese rule. Later, Sung decided to join the Anti-Japanese United Army, becoming a failed guerrilla leader who spent much of World War II unsuccessfully attempting to free Korea from the iron fist of the Japanese so it could be seized by the iron fist of Kim Il Sung instead. He eventually gave up and fled to Siberia, where he remained until the Soviet Union selected him to lead their newly organized North Korean puppet government. At the time, he had not actually lived in Korea for 26 years, and had not been involved in the country's politics or the resistance against the Japanese for at least five years. His primary historical accomplishment involved starting a war of conquest that nearly succeeded before an intervention that left his entire country occupied, followed by starting a precedent for the next 60+ years, China intervening and the border mostly going back to where it was in the first place.
According to Juche philosophy, Kim Il Sung was not Stalinist and this was just anti-communist propaganda performed by the United States and pro-capitalist mass media, like CNN, Fox, Disney, Microsoft, and Wikipedia, but actually Kim Il Sung had based upon the Juche Idea copy-pasting some concepts extracted from Leon Trotsky and his theory of "Permanent Revolution", and added to this some philosophical concepts extracted from Lao Tzu and his Taoism, a claim so absurd given Kim's extreme isolationism and pervasive nationalism that it doesn't even merit serious consideration. He created an extremely totalitarian monarchy in North Korea which had roughly as much to do with Marxism as botany has to do with blacksmithing.
See also[edit]
- Kim Jong-il, his batshit crazy son
- Kim Jong-un, his even crazier grandson
References[edit]
- ↑ Juche! The Speeches and Writings of Kim Il Sung by Kim Il Sung (1972) Grossman. ISBN 067041011X.