Gordon Robertson

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Parroting squawkbox
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And a dirty dozen more

Gordon Robertson (1958–) is the Chief Executive Officer of the Christian Broadcasting Network (CBN), a position he assumed on November 30, 2007. His father, Rev. Pat Robertson, owned CBN. Getting that job must have been very competitive, another illustration of the entrepreneurial, "pull yourself up by your own bootstraps" spirit that characterizes most figures on the Religious Right.

God Wants You to Smoke Ditchweed[edit]

Gordon, whose voice is creepily similar to that of Bill Clinton, is a frequent co-host on the 700 Club show. During a July 14, 2010 broadcast of that show, he answered a question by asserting that selectively breeding strains of marijuana with higher levels of THC was contrary to the will of God: "That's not what God intended." By implication, the Almighty must also disapprove of the following:

  • Hybrid corn
  • Selection of mates based upon their attractiveness
  • Apples, strawberries, bananas and other fruit with very small wild versions
  • Dog breeds that don't resemble aren't wolves
  • Roses
  • Lettuce (unless it's really bitter)
  • Broccoli
  • Cauliflower
  • Etc.

See also[edit]

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