RationalWiki:What is going on in the world?/August 2012

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August 2012[edit]

36

And you wonder why Marxism became a political force.

24

Clint Eastwood just upstaged Rick Perry in the stupidest grouping of words ever made. Update: All praise the Invisible President.

24

They still don't get it, do they? "Father Benedict Groeschel, American Friar, Claims Teens Seduce Priests In Some Sex Abuse Cases."

13

Never mess with Bill Nye!(Warning: Poe's Law in action!)

8

What a dick head!

12

"I don't approve of what Breivik did, but Norway totally deserved it."

43

Arctic sea ice levels hit a record low. Gee, it's sure a good thing that global warming is a communist hoax, or I would be getting a bit worried right about now.

16

Pissing on Lincoln's grave, are we?

11

"We take Gotham from the corrupt - the rich, the oppressors of generations who have kept you down with myths of opportunity - and we give it back to you. The people." Anarchist soldiers plot a coup.

20

New Zealand 'marriage equality' bill passes its first hurdle with former staunch opponents voting to allow gay marriage.

6

Screw all this politics. Chocolate reduces risk of strokes for men research claims

20

Personhood USA fails again to put Personhood up for a vote in Colorado.

16

Photojournalism proves its relevance: Mitt Romney thanks his top donors during a private party, on his friend's yacht flying a Cayman Islands flag.

10

This isn't going to end well.

44

Top Romney aide: "We're not going to let our campaign be dictated by fact checkers."[No, not The Onion]

16

Fetch the popcorn: First three-way civil union signed in Brazil, causing anger and legal headscratching.

3

Even the Daily Fail gets it right, every so often. Bics for her, not the brightest marketing strategy ever devised, even during the Silly Season.

35

A few weeks ago, several Ohio coal miners claim that their employer forced them to give up a day's work (and with it, a day's pay) to attend a Romney rally. The coal company's response: "Our managers communicated to our workforce that the attendance at the Romney event was mandatory, but no one was forced to attend." What a surprise: Bob Murray, the CEO of the company (which was fined millions of dollars for failing to meet safety standards that resulted in a 2007 mine collapse, killing eight people) is also a climate change denialist.

26

A word of advice to Republican politicians. The word "rape", stop using it.

16

Sasquashed

13

Israel, what the hell?

15

Anti-gay activist taken into custody for underage homosexual sex. What is it with these guys?

5

A New Zealand study suggests marijuana usage under the age of 18 reduces intelligence, but fine in any other age range.

20

A new Arizona law, signed by Governor Brewer, defines pregnancy as starting two weeks prior to conception. Very sadly, not The Onion.

15

And yet a textbook that says the Loch Ness Monster disproves evolution and another one that says electricity is a mysterious force is perfectly fine.

17

The Taliban really, really hate partying.

24

America is utterly, utterly doomed. 'Clean energy, he said, “would slow the winds down”.'

25

The South shall rise again!

15

Regret running back to the GOP, Ron?

16

Charlie Crist, former Republican Governor of Florida, endorses...Obama!

34

Idaho Republican wonders if women even know what rape is. Also not The Onion.

45

0% of blacks for Mitt Romney. Not The Onion.

15

Faux News decides it's ok if they put US servicemen and their families in harm's way.

15

Scientologists ♥ Ron Paul.

16

It may be international GoTopless day, but the Catholic Church have declared it National Marriage Sunday and are getting the big guns out: a letter denouncing gay marriage is to be read in every Catholic church in Scotland.

56

The first man to walk on another world, Neil Armstrong, has died at the age of 82. His family asks "Next time you walk outside on clear night and see the moon smiling down at you, think of Neil and give him a wink."

21

Mitt Romney: Birther-in-Chief.

22

Not content with the birther crown, Donald Trump expands into Vaccine hysteria. One more batshit cause and he wins the trifecta

5

Gold buggery now official GOP policy

14

"Several Republican state attorney generals called a key provision of the Voting Rights Act unconstitutional and asked the Supreme Court to strike it down."

16

Reagan judge says "Deregulation fundamental mistake." Greenspan agrees.

16

Tampa Bay strip clubs prepare for RNC. [Oh god, am I the only one who wishes there was a warning when a link leads to a video?]

20

Once again, Christians show that the First Amendment only applies to them.

12

Another shooting. This time in NYC. Update: the shooter shot one person, the NYPD shot nine.

8

An Norwegian art gallery tried to save some money by receiving a painting by normal post, not a special courier, but it went 'walkies' in the post. The piece? A £5,400 Rembrandt, Lieven Willemsz, van Coppenol

14

Gawker releases an audit of Romney's off-shore finances.

12

Anders Behring Breivik declared sane, sentenced to 21 years, may be extended for "preventative detention" according to the Guardian and the New York Times. Other news agencies are reporting that he has been sentenced to between a minimum of ten years and the legal maximum of 21.

8

We're all in this together: Bank of England's stimulus "lined the pockets of the rich"

-16

Don't do 'roids, kids: Not only is a popular cancer charity forever tainted, the cyclist responsible thinks that whining about an "unconstitutional witch hunt" makes him less of a coward.

13

Death from Above!!! Mwaahaahaahaa!!!!! Well, okay, it's a hover-bike. Still cool though.

8

Who knows? Maybe someday it'll be news if a family values advocate isn't caught doing something indecent in public. Headline: "Rev. Grant Storms, critic of (gay New Orleans website) Southern Decadence, convicted of obscenity for public masturbation."

20

The best way to stop abortions is deadly force.

20

Apparently spying on American muslims is a big waste of time. NYPD reacts in shock that their sure fire investigation failed to turn up any terrorists. Cenk weighs in.

18

Tennessee State Senator Stacey (yes, he's a guy) Campfield says it's virtually impossible to get AIDS through heterosexual sex.

14

NASA names Curiosity rover's landing spot in memory of Ray Bradbury.

16

"The move was not partisan" Oh yeah, totally.

7

Locked-in syndrome sufferer dies a week after losing a legal challenge for assisted suicide.

26

Just when you thought they couldn't grow them any dumber: A Texas high school grad-u-wate judge says if Obama wins, he wants to be prepared for civil war and a UN takeover.

14

Finally! Journalists (or at least one, so far) are starting to do their friggin' jobs.

12

Art restoration - you're doing it wrong.

4

The accusations against Julian Assange amount to nothing more than "bad sexual ettiquette" according to George Galloway [1].

8

Scott Brown understands how his bread is buttered..

25

Romney: You're going to make us lose the election! Akin: Nah, I'm going to stay around for as long as I want to.

12

It seems that neo-Nazis, skinheads and other militant racists are joining the US Army and Marine Corps to get the military training they think they'll need to overthrow the "ZOG" in Washington, DC.

13

Ordering a hex on that annoying guy at work just got a little harder.

25

Democracy - Republicans are doing it wrong.

85

The President: "Rape is rape. And the idea that we should be parsing and qualifying and slicing what types of rape we are talking about doesn't make sense to the American people and certainly doesn't make sense to me...I think these comments do underscore why we shouldn't have a bunch of politicians, a majority of whom are men, making health care decisions on behalf of women."

9

Congressman Kevin Yoder: I'm sorry for swimming naked in the Sea of Galilee. Sometimes, the WIGO's just write themselves.

26

Meanwhile, at the Iowa State Fair: Hank Williams, Jr. - "Obama is a Muslim!" Obama - "mmm pork and beer nom nom nom."

20

The devi-YOU'RE GOING TO LOSE YOUR SCHOLARSHIP, LADY!

18

Ohio GOP election official in an email to newspaper: "I guess I really actually feel we shouldn’t contort the voting process to accommodate the urban -- read African-American -- voter-turnout machine"

80

You don't need abortion exceptions for when the woman was raped, because if she got pregnant, it wasn't really rape. Todd Akin sets a new record for being a shitbag.

11

"No officer, I didn't stab my daughters, it was the century-old ghost living inside my head."

22

Back in 2008 Iceland was facing economic Armageddon. Guess their unemployment rate now.

16

From the Department of Say-No-More: Majority of Tea Party members support carrying concealed weapons in church.

8

Meet Earth. Where the closest thing to "atheistic" evil still sounds like a fundamentalist tract.

20

The pregnant teen, who couldn't have chemotherapy due to the Dominican Republic's abortion laws, has died.

10

At the University of Colorado, students with gun permits are now segregated into special dorms. Incredibly, the university still allows these students to bring their weapons to class (provided they're concealed).

42

"Oh no, our mosque is too small to fit us all in!" "Here, borrow our synagogue."

18

Conservatives! Meet your new home: Россия, священная наша держава, Россия любимая наша страна...

42

Pro-life until birth. Pat Robertson says you shouldn't adopt children who've been sexually abused, in case they grow up "weird."

8

Libertarian Party sues to remove Romney from State ballot.

18

Holding a democratic protest against a dictator in a church? Obviously, you hate Christianity!

38

Paul Ryan applied for stimulus funds in 2009, despite calling it a "wasteful spending spree."

16

Romney uses band's song for his campaign. Band says, "I don't fucking think so."

0

Facebook is finally beginning to succumb to pressure on user privacy. Coincidence?

30

Mittens: I pay at least 13% in taxes and 10% in charity. Alright then. Release them so we can put this to rest, just like your father did when running for governor of Michigan, and like Obama did with his freaking birth certificate,

4

The cereal-burning anti-gay protester is dead. Meanwhile, the English translation of the tribute on the Facebook page of Leisner’s nephew, a missionary in Costa Rica, was mangled, reading: "Please pray for the family of Mike to feel the spirit of God as dildo in this time of a loss."

8

The Tea Party displays a sane, reasonable, rational campaign poster. Not!

16

Seriously, in this day and age how dumb must you be to agree to your 12-year-old having a sleepover with a 46-year-old priest?

10

UK threatens to storm the Ecuadorian embassy in order to get Assange. Under pressure from Big Brother? Update: Are we ready for another Falklands now?

5

The USA's population reaches 0.1 giga-π

8

VIDEO: "We have been very transparent to what’s legally required of us. But the more we release, the more we get attacked, the more we get questioned, the more we get pushed. And so we have done what's legally required, and there's going to be no more tax releases given." So sayeth Ann Romney. Meanwhile, Mitt Romney claims that the Obama campaign strategy is "about division and attack and hatred . . . designed to bring a sense of enmity and jealously and anger." If they're this thin-skinned during the earliest days of the campaign, what will they sound like by the first of November? (And how will they react to criticism if he's elected?)

8

Shooting at Family Research Council headquarters. One guard injured.

8

French Catholic Church attempts to pray the gay marriage away.

26

Joe the Plumber: "...put a damn fence on the border going to Mexico and start shooting."

36

CNN's Soledad O'Brien: Paul Ryan is talking out of his ass. Romney advisor: WAAAHHH

6

Hulk Merkel smash.

30

In the United States, atheism up, religion down according to Gallup.

20

Catholic Church makes a fortune in the German porn business. Somehow, I'm not really surprised.

22

Anti-Semite party leader discovers Jewish Heritage. This could be an analogous law of Haggard's Law

6

The wrath of libertarians: Failed Bitcoin exchange sued by customers over thefts. Getting your money back from an exchange run by anonymous operators is, of course, the legitimate purview of government.

12

X-Butterflies come forth!

-10

...and then 2 people, one a policeman get shot down in Texas.

22

Gabby Giffords returns home.

46

The US Army promotes its first openly gay general

22

WikiLeaks proves its relevance yet again, is currently getting pounded by a DDoS from what most likely is the US government. Update: Assange et al.'s response.

12

You don't often hear Fox News being called too leftist, but that's what batshit birther Jerome Corsi claims.

6

Fareed Zakaria might get sacked for plagiarism.

12

Romney campaign sources have leaked his choice for running mate: Matthew Morrison. Official announcement on Saturday.

28

It died a quick death. Released in April, a Christian publisher has yanked a biography of Thomas Jefferson which had already been voted "the least credible history book in print," by readers of the History News Network in July. "We carefully edit every book we publish, and we rely on the expertise of our authors concerning their subjects," a representative for the publisher said. "It is extremely rare that the company would have to withdraw a book from the market based on concerns about its content." Memo to Christian publishers: If the byline contains the name "David Barton," it's full of lies myths distortions you should be concerned about its content!

26

We might be in for quite a Streisand: Even the ultra-rich have begun to pay no income tax, and Romney's reluctance to release the data his returns is getting more and more suspicious.

14

Mother of God.

26

Missouri legislates that creationist kids can refuse to study evolution.

13

Melvin Morse, known for writing about NDEs in children, arrested for water-boarding his daughter.

12

The trick of using prisoners as slave economically viable labour continues to grow in the UK.

6

Ah, kids' sticker albums. Collect your favourite sporting heroes... interesting animals...drug lords...

10

Jenna Jameson endorses Romney: "When you're rich, you want a Republican in office."

24

Bryan Fischer compares children of gay parents to slaves needing to be saved

5

Occam's Razor?

12

Evolution in action, and boy, is it mean.

2

Pass me the coffee, baby

26

DON'T MENTION ROMNEYCARE!!

0

Drunk claims "religious reason" for setting fire to toilet seat.

18

'Allo 'allo 'allo, what's all this then? Not smiling during an Olympic event? You're under arrest!

1

"Let them eat pigeons!" (obviously pigeon pie isn't a local delicacy there...)

11

Hello, my name is Stephen Harper, and I don't want to look like George W. Bush in any way whatsoever.

10

Rogue condoms invade the Olympic Village.

9

Poisoning the well or legitimate concern over the lengths that Mitt Romney went to start Bain Capital? We may never know unless he releases his tax returns.

12

Kristina Schröder, German Federal Minister for Family Affairs, Senior Citizens, Women and Youth, makes the greatest spin ever: "[Same-sex couples in civil partnerships] take on long-term responsibility for each other, so they live out conservative values" (Mind you, it's not as far out as David Cameron's "I support gay marriage because I’m a Conservative" statement.)

15

Pregnant? Y'all ain't comin' to our school! Screw Title IX!

20

The WWW turns 21, and its baby photos are online

6

I'm shocked, shocked to find that gambling is going on in here! Pro-Immigrant GOP Group to Arpaio: Refocus on Fixing Department. this is for people who don't get the quote

0

"Librul media!" "If the turban infidels had guns this would have never happened!" "Obama false flag conspiracy!" "PC hysteria!"

46

Your socialism at work, America. (Curiosity lands on Mars.)

12

The Cayman Islands: Start paying up.

17

Dan Ariely and Mike Norton find that Democrats' and Republicans' ideas of the ideal distribution of wealth in the United States are, in fact, very, very similar when under the "veil of ignorance."

8

Team GB's most successful day at an Olympics in 104 years.

-9

Black Helicopters flying low over a New England city unannounced after dark, complete with special operations troops rappelling onto rooftops.

1

Why can't you just let me lose a match? Heck, I'll quit if you are insisting that I can't lose on my own.

25

Author and scientist, Jared Diamond, to Romney: "What the fuck are you talking about?"

28

Fox News host says "Once again, we put something on the air that's a flat out lie and distortion." (*gasp*)

18

Tired of the Chick-fil-A controversy yet? Well, too bad. A Mississippi congressional candidate says the Mayors of Chicago and Boston should be "introduced to the Second Amendment". Update: Sarah Palin doesn't know what the First Amendment actually means.

10

Mittens throws his wife (and her horse) under the bus.

14

Homeopaths offer to rebrand products as confectionery, but out of necessity, not honesty.

20

What? You're giving women access to birth control? That's as bad as 9/11!

10

Diarrhea epidemic hits the US

14

Gore Vidal, celebrated author, playwright, dies