Conservapedia:What is going on at CP?/March 2009

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16

Andy gets so excited over a headline mentioning Obama, ACORN, and the census all together that he slaps it on the mainpage raw.img Never mind that according to his cited source, all ACORN will do is encourage people to mail in their census forms so that the Census Bureau will not have to pay house calls... Extra: User: Actually, ACORN had employees that committed voter registration fraud, not election fraud.img TK:You are wrong, lib'rul. Final Warning to you!img User: ...but all the evidence, including factcheck.org say otherwise. Please show me the error of my ways with a source? TK: Ha! Don't you know that it is YOUR responsibility to find sources for my argument against yourself?!img Conclusion: User appeals once more to rational thought, only to have TK remove the entire discussion with the edit summary, Get out of here with that Euro nonsense!img

3

TK continues being a Poe (and Andy refuses to acknowledge): Only those outside the US believe liberals are good people. Americans know liberals are evil!img Completely unrelated: TK, please learn not to separate the subject from the predicate with a comma!

11

President Barack Obama spends all Sunday at the gym rather than Church! Unsourced, but he's so damn chiselled, it's probably true!img

19

Gentlemen, I bring you an early glimpse!img I can't wait to see which article will get this... KENDATE: More info!img "Evolutionist ladies and gentlemen at a rather liberal website, Operation Hasenpfeffer will be sprung at time of my choosing. It will soon be time to flush that atheist/evolutionist rabbit out of his hole or have him shamefully burrow himself in deeper." Too many Bugs Bunny cartoons, Ken ?

92

New user: You have a couple of errors in your lecture. Can I help?img Andy: If you think you're so smart, I dare you to take my exam! We don't like know-it-alls here, and I know you're wrong!img New user: I would do your exam if I thought you could give a good exam.img 'Nother user: You're wrong, Andy.img Andy: "I'd too see if either you could even score 50% on the World History Midterm Exam. Looks like both you won't dare display your real knowledge."img New user: Here you go. And here's some facts. And I'm still willing to help.img Aside: New user has decided to put facts into Andy's lectures...img Will there be a ban brewing? TEACAKED: Banned!img UPDATE: Block challenged!img MOAR UPDATE: I'm sorry, did you say something?img ANDEEEEE: He got second place in the exams. But he's still wrong!img Why won't the Brits just admit Andy's truth? And Prussia is still the former name of Germany. TK: unblock of JosephMacimg only six hours after TK dragged the discussion behind closed doors... and now, the former name of Germany is Waldeck.img MORRRRRREEEEEE: Slap!img BACK!!! Mr. Schlafly, sorry I got banned. But many of us Brits have told you you're wrong. Allow me to edit your lectures now.img Countdown to ban...

18

Ed reflectsimg on his boot-licking of Andy and TK. Now he understands why he didn't regain adminship at WP.

23

Same-sex marriage coming to Iowaimg is down to the Iowa Supreme Court overruling the will of the people. For some reason unknown to the rest of us, this makes the whole state lib-burr-ull.img

23

Ed continues creating one-sentence stubs of whatever pops into his head. Does this oneimg contain a message from Ed's own subconscious mind?

58

♗ x ♛ !img Andy refuses to give in....

9

You can't see it, but it's everywhere. It's as deadly as a lion and as stealthy as a snake. It promises to wreak untold, ghastly destruction. It's ... SOCIALIZED MEDICINE!img (Now where have we heard this before?)

8

Ed helpfully removes some gossipimg from the news column. The deletion of most of the news items there is expected to follow.

10

Ed creates a fine new articleimg...copied entirely from here. But he linked it at the bottom, so that's okay, right? Right?

13

A user who would google the phrase "unintended consequences" on the internet machine would CLEARLY be looking for this articleimg.

21

My new favorite euphemism for sex, courtesy of CP: "addiction to unchastity."img

13

CP logic condensed into one sentence: "The individual examples are powerful and just as compelling as more-difficult-to-find statistics."img Yeah, Andy! You forget those hard-to-find "facts!"

25

What?! America interferedimg in Chile's politics? Ed can't have that!

41

More unhinged antics from lulzmaster Ken.img Ken believes that Richard Dawkins has shown up on CP, calls his argument about the Boteach/Dawkins slight "Vandalism," then wants to know why the person he believes is Dawkins won't debate Boteach, because "Conservapedians would truly love to see Rabbi Boteach pummel you a second time in a public debate!" Calm down, Ken , and clean off your monitor; Dawkins doesn't care about CP, nor you.

25

Ed Poor gives us a largely incomprehensible "thought of the day"img. It's something to do with Black Beauty I think...

16

Joaquín Martínez posts a news item from, of all sources, Al Jazeera.img

21

Andy seems a little confused... No more of thatimg pro-lifeimg crapimg around here! Blocked!img

-11

Gentlemen, I'll let you in on a secret... My plan all along is for CP's evolution article to be in the top ten of a Google search!img Ole! Ole! Oh who gives a shit?

12

TK once again proves Poe's Law with this gem: "Something that is a truism (Obama's terrorist sympathies) shouldn't have to have evidence."img

10

Really?....That'simg the only thing you think could be improved?

-52

CUR leaves a lame Parthian shot.img Really lame.img World+dog doesn't care.

4

Ken, a good chess player never plays against himself, especially when the user is blockedimg. Did you take that as a resignation from the liberal opponent?

23

Homeskollers never cheat! I mean, they could, since the answers are posted on a talk page where everybody goes, but why should they? They aren't evil LIEBRULES!img

10

NEW WORD!!!!img

14

Karajou breaks an irony meter: Duh, them universities are dumb; they don't even know how to use these here electronic computers.img UPDATE: Karajou retracts his earlier statement. They did it on purpose instead.img

20

Jpatt's Obama-boner becomes even harder: "Muslim agenda of the Obama administration"img - Step One of The Muslim Agenda: Obama used his full name!

13

Karajou is in a panic because Barney Frank wants the government to regulate your salary!img Karajou didn't read his own link where it says the bill applies to companies that "have received a capital investment from the U.S. government", or, in other words, companies where the government has invested bailout money.

37

Our man in the moon: Only Andy can falsify the unfalsifiable!img BREAKING NEWS: An extremely rare occurrence: Andy concedes a pointimg, albeit a "semantic" one. For extra fun, read the entire pageimg where this issue has been brought up two years ago by various users... including Roger Schlafly!

12

Go tell it on the mountain, that Andy has some Good News for us: Handguns are on the riseimg (in one small town in Minnesota, anyway).

17

Ken deletesimg, then renewsimg the cheetah article (probably to mess up our links), complete with parody content and an inane edit comment! GENTLEMEN! MOAR: TK restores the rest of the edits.

11

It is anti-Americanimg for the government to keep newspapers afloat. But it is, of course, perfectly all right for the government to keep churches afloat.img

21

Jpatt: Conservapedia's parodists are obviously being bankrolled by, you guessed it, Barack ("Hussein") Obama.img

23

How could a collection of good, Christian nations fight each other during the Second First World War, asks ProfessorimgTeacher Andy? Evolutionists and that gosh-darned survival of the fittestimg, that's why!

10

Just when you think that the bottle's empty there's always one more drop at the bottomimg.

8

Ed Poor knows someone who knows the "leader of the Washington Times!"img (Which makes sense, as the Times is owned by the Reverend Moon.)

-74

Acionyx jubatusimg my kitten drowning ass!. We don't need this Creationist crap here!img

25

Welcome to Bizarro-CP: Andy: "George W. Bush shouldn't be called a conservative."img - Ed Poor: "Liberals don't deserve all the blame for something."img

27

Congratulations to homeschool instructor Andy Schlafly, whose managed to have two thirds of his class score a D or Fimg (i.e. 30 or less correct out of 44) on his Bible Study World History Midtermimg exam. Money well spent, parents.

35

The Schlafly way: "Ah thanks for your service, Lib'rul. Funny though, you must have decided to leaveimg because my awesome midterm shows how awesome and superior conservative learning is."img

39

The quality of feedback from "Amateur-fessor" Andy: "Great score, 33 out of 37!img But don't be optimistic, I grade the weaker students' papers first!" "Wait, no, 32.img You had another mistake I didn't catch!" "Someone's scored higher than you!"img "Nope, 31!img Found another mistake you made." GOAT: How does he get 37 points, when the exam is 35 questions, with 9 honors questions and an extra credit question? Update the results are back and the winner got 42 out of 37.

-46

Hello new user!img Goodbye!img

50

WesleyS runs for the hills.img Andy's circle grows smaller by the day.

31

Another educational and high quality entry!img

19

Andy identifies the problem of "high word:substance ratio"img... CP-speak: the only language in the world whose vocabulary gets smaller every year. Soon there will be only simple dichotomies and Big Brother's Andy's new Conservative words left.

30

Discussing pro-abstinence, conservative VP candidate's unwed daughter's actual pregnancyimg = gossipimg. Discussing an unseen video of liberal VP's daughter allegedly using cocaine = Front Page Newsimg

25

ThomasW expresses his amazementimg that anyone thinks TK is for real. Andy disagreesimg with the suggestion that he cannot tell people's motives with his claimed 95% accuracy. Thomas says the B wordimg and gets bannedimg, of course.

76

Namby-pamby 'energy saving' is for FAGS!img Efficiency is an anti-American UN plot!img. Pffft, Earth Hour is just an excuse for liberals to be lazyimg.

30

Andy tosses down the gauntletimg to the dum librulz ... safe in the knowledge that they - and often their entire neighbourhoods - are permabanned from CP anyway.

17

Dandy Andy tries for his own Edgar Award by clarifying pre-Christ Romans did not know absolute truthimg, not truth truth; and when did "regret" become so selfish?img

-77

Yet another userimg quits Coservapedia. Will more follow? Will more RW users lern how to spel "Conservapedia" at least?

6

TK proves the media is deceitful, by arguing that CNN, Time Magazine and the Los Angeles Timesimg report the story. Where's the deceit? Apparently, the organization providing the figures is labeled "advancing women's reproductive rights." Bad media! Bad!

70

Classic deranged Schlafly: Andy versus a good natured user, who is on the same side and agrees with Andyimg. How dare he make a friendly suggestion to add a link to a charity and not mention LIBRULS?! Contribute more! Liberal deceit! We won't have charities around here! Defeating liberals is more important than supporting charities! *BANNED!*img

7

"Conservapedia has more fans of its evolution article among YouTube video producers!" It certainly does.

13

Irony meters all over the world detect the powerful blastimg that occurred at Conservapedia.

32

Another editor flees the toxic dump CP has become, leaving a a final note. This site is failing rapidly!

28

Another validimg query with a misinformed responseimg, followed by a blockimg.

89

PJR tells all! (Linked from here.)

-21

Probablyimg, Andy. Because you don't know how many students are actually in your class, nor do you remember where you stopped your lecture. And you are the teacher.

20

People "must be ready to defy the President when they disagree with his policies."img Irony meters overload. UPDATE:Find the word "defy" that isn't a headline nor a commentary on CP's link. For ref. the complete text of Jindal's speech

20

Ed: Mental health problems are a matter of choiceimg. Now pull your socks up and stop acting so depressed!

14

Ed: "We follow the Principle of Least Surpriseimg here... and no surprise! here's the articleimg".

6

Please Sirimg, may I have some more... block rights, so I too can torment the few editors we have left.

12

China is part of Europeimg, according to DeanS. Did they move, or did Belgium launch a leveraged buyout? UPDATE Hello, Dean!img

10

CP takes issue with WP's "entry on 'Gun Politics in the United States' that falsely claims that 'Gun politics as a political issue dates to the earliest days of the United States.'img To be fair, the 2nd Amendment is pretty far down to read.

15

Ken and aSK: Q: Are you conservative at aSK? A: No! Q: Are you Ruylopez? A: I plead a grammatically awkward Fifth! UPDATE: Burnt.img Ken sucks. MOAR: Screen cap of what Ken burned. MOAR! well, someone was bound to do it...img

10

Bad Jessica! You don't fuck withimg Ken 's SMEAR OF THE FOREVER!

23

Monet can only be fully appreciated printed out on a laser printer from a (37kb!!) JPEGimg rather than on the wall in art museums.

69

PJR starts his own wiki in response to all the crap he's received at CP. Is this the beginning of a long and beautiful fiendship?

3

TK: Don't add things from Media Matters for America, since they're biased.img Before adding negative comments, back them up! Glenn's own words, TK.

2

Andy the Linguist votes in "assimilate," out "me-too."img But Andy, that word is from the 16th century, and "desired" may be pushing it. Twofer, "smoke and mirrors" is now a conservative word. Maybe?img

9

Ed Poor, scientist: "Anyway, science is not about authority or polls: it's the search for cause and effect. A theory makes predictions. If the predictions don't come true, a true scientists (sic) junks the theory and starts over."img Funny, that's not the Conservapedia way.img

22

Andy somehow manages to dip a little further, claiming the English language is growing more conservative and so is the United States. Why is Obama president you ask? "Simple, actually I've made up another new term for it- it's smoke and mirrors! Aren't I great?!"img UPDATE:It just gets better: My list of less than 100 "words" most of which are actually phrases is undeniable proof that English is growing more conservative.img

8

TK shines again:img "Good Christians are suddenly labeled 'right-wing' by the media! How dare they brand people like that? I mean, all they did was standing up against anti-Catholic leftists!"

30

TK points out that "Many are thinking it is high time to remove the special rights the media is granted in the Constitution, because they have long ago forsworn their duty to the public."img Like maybe, oh, I don't know... a Fairnessimg Doctrineimg? MOAR: Lets just edit that silly old Constitution, huh?img Its only four little words.

6

According to TKimg, who manages to come up with two different spellings of Fannie Mae, both wrong, the fact Barney Frank's ex-lover ran a call boy service makes him ineligible to comment on the Supreme Court. (Oh, and Frank is about to turn (hee-hee-hee) 69. We get the joke, TK.)

31

Projection 101: TK lets loose:img "Conservatives intrinsically reject Ad hominem," but liberals and atheists are moral relativists, Richard Dawkins is immoral and deceitful, and if you don't agree with TK, you're a deceitful person. All in the same short post, folks!

0

Funny, you'd think that 'ol assfly wouldn't criticize his fellow idiots...[1]img

25

Pepperlynn packs it in, with a succinct parthian shot

57

Andyimg thinksimg the Associated Press use Conservapedia to do their factchecking. However,img a careful reader might have inferred it from where it is clearly stated in the original article, which was posted at least four hours before Andy's claim. "Cody? Cody?"img.

2

All in favor of kicking JM out of the Featured Article Committee for repeatedly moving the Featured Article under Ken's Article Of Eternity and the Masterpiece?img Update(?): Knowing that Philip is gone and JM is working for him, Ken once again testsimg just how much he can get away with by also moving the Article Of The Year to the top.

7

In life, you win some and you lose some, but it's always nice to know that Ed Poor can see the good side of everything.img

27

Andy asks the hard-hitting questions...The Head of Special Olympics accepts Obama's apology, but did Obama apologize?img No.img The liberal bias of reality is alive and kicking. UPDATE: woo, Pepperlynn really understood Andy want concise answersimg. Moar: Pepperlynn also understood that it's better to leave on your own termsimg instead of waiting for the Goon Squad to kick in your door. Takes all the fun out of being a goon, doesn't it, JY23img?

25

Ed "Permaban for saying 'Your opinion sucks!' in jest" Poor catches somebody who said "to revert that moron's edits" and lays down the law: "May I edit your comment, Terry?"img UPDATE Ok, I won't call that moron a moron, if you don't like itimg

31

The racist vibes are true in this one.img UPDATE For you the war is over, Yankee dog!img

22

Lord Voldemort works in concert with CP to catch vandals.img

14

Andy turns Best New Conservative Wordsimg into a century by century footraceimg.

15

CP: We don't like none of them WORDS things in our arguments!img If you have a point, quote verse; if you have something to hide, be technical! UPDATE: User blocked (TK IP insanity, apparently not because of this), and page burned.

36

Youtube creationism nutter Venomfangx signsimg up for CP... and lasts 4 minutesimg.

29

Andy "The Dude" Schlafly to JoshuaZ: "You had potential, but atheism made you dumb."img

31

Andy revisits his childhood.img 0 in mental problems, indeed.

26

Andy's logic: If I do somethingimg, that means it's spreading like wildfire!img

14

Eugh! Science!img

10

TK: "Jefferson wrote that bit about the separation between Church and State only once, for crying out loud! That doesn't mean anything!img The man likely didn't even mean it!"

52

BREAKING NEWS: hELL. Freezes. Over!img UPDATE Thaws, then re-freezes!img

-20

Joaquín Martínez: Somehow thisimg constitutes a "masterpiece." Conservapedia's standards must be slipping...

9

Better late than never. Or maybe... not: December 28: A user asksimg for help/clarification. February 13: TK bansimg the user. March 21: TK is happy to help!img

56

Andy admits he likes theimg British National Party, except where they're too liberal. This is what happens when you think education comes from pontificating before doing the requisite reading, even at your own blog.

12

Corrupted by Hollywood Valuesimg: Ayn Rand?img

12

Ed "Math Teacher" Poor: "Obama was born in August 1961, now it's March 2009, so Obama is 48."img - Andy "Obama lies about everything" Schlafly: "You're wrong, Obama is 47... according to his published birthday,img at least..."

10

Andy quotes from this completely unbiased 'source'img written by someone called 'Schlafly', even if he can't even spell the title properly

55

Schlafly Skimming at its best: The Telegraph laughs at Conservapedia for "hav[ing] no time for reality's liberal bias." Andy, in his infinite illiteracy, brags about being in the news.img UPDATE: "Conservative" and "UK" don't belong in the same sentence.img

105

PJR throwsimg in the towel and decides to make a much-anticipated PJR Wiki. Will Andy beg him to stay, or wave goodbye to another librull?

17

Apparently, steering away from incredible liberal sources and keeping it family-friendly doesn't apply when you're Ed Poor being creepy.img

19

...or just email me your phone number if you are.img

-19

While Fred Phelps says, "Thank God for IEDs," Jpatt says, There are no IEDs.img (Or any instability in Iraq, for that matter.)

29

Ed Poor gets creepier and creepier.img

39

Mild jokes at a sysop's expense?img We can'timg have that!imgUPDATE JY23 moves with the times and breaks off all ties.img

25

A bombardment of questions leaves ASchlafly with little choice but to curl up into a ballimg and roll away. EXTRA LULZ: The questioner (whom Andy told to "Contribute more, and more substantively") had already been bannedimg.

3

Foxtrot warns of T3H Eebil Librul Deseats!img Bonus points for his assertation that "echo chambers" actually ARE a bad thing.

52

Jpatt pens a new masterpieceimg, because, after all, whatever opinion you write is true as long as you quote the Bible.

15

"How different their example is from the Internet Trolls and vandals (they mentioned us on the telly!) most of us must interact with daily, who claim to be rational, yet seek to deny those who disagree with them (come talk to us here, idiots! We won't let cuR anyone block you!) the right to their own voice." Real subtle, TK;img one would never guess to whom you are referring.

4

The right-wingers are getting their knickers in a twist at the prospect of reinstituting the draft.img Why? Because the inductees would be sent to help people rather than blow them up.

35

Irony Meter ASPLODE! Andy explainsimg the "mental problems" statement. Quoth the Assfly himself: "...Public school students have high percentages of mental problems. I doubt that's a coincidence, given what they are taught and told to repeat. Free yourself from that here..." DIPSHIT.

16

Andy's newest historical insight: Galileo's house arrest was like the internment of Japanese Americans during the Second World Warimg.

8

Our favorite xenophobe's latest newsbite: Nancy Pelosi expresses an opinion about immigrants. This makes her guilty of disagreeing with him "endless liberal ignorance."img

15

ENorman leaves Conservapedia with a parthian shotimg, a threat regarding a high-level sock, and a friendly offer to some of Conservapedia's more moderate users.

12

According to Andy,img the words "Good Samaritan" were not available to the translators of the King James Bible, not even when they wrote about the... er... good Samaritan? But at least now we know why the KJV didn't mention the War On Terror or the American Dream.

29

CP's quest to erase any feeling of a community goes on: First, Ed declaredimg that not everybody is an "editor", but rather a "contributor", and now Andy points out that even "contributor" is a title to be earnedimg - all to defend his "Zero Mental Illnesses Among CP Contributors!" claim.

25

Our obsessionimg withimg homosexualityimg? You mean librul homosexual obsessionimg? Sure, Foxtrot. You don't have any obsession with homosexuality at all.img Nope, notimg atimg allimg

55

Oh, sweet merciful crap -- Ken Conservapedia has launchedimg a YouTube channel. UPDATE: Apparently, comments are now moderated. Surprise, surprise.

28

Conservative consistency on the News page. TK complainsimg that a low rate of condom use is contributing to an AIDS "epidemic" in D.C. Six items above, Dean reinterprets the Pope's statement that condoms are "not the answer" to mean that "Condoms 'Increase' AIDS Epidemic in Africa"img.

69

How to be a douche, TK-style: 1) User raises concernimg 2) Let them know that you can see their personal info, so they don't try to raise concern againimg 3) Another user questions your moveimg 4) Attack with "LIBERAL," "AD HOMINEM," "DECEIT," "MENTAL ILLNESS," "FRAUD," and anything else you can.img 5) User concedes defeatimg 6) In an act of stupendous self-contradiction, deny that the user could have been mistakenimg and GODSPEEDimg. MOAR: Accuse banned user of deceit for refusing to acknowledge they are wrongimg

8

PJR claims that "NIV is not 'liberal'"img - but surely, Philip, you admit that NIV is a disputed (and thus at least more liberal) translationimg since it only has 14 references to Hell, 35 references to the Devil, and watered down "Holy Ghost" to "Holy Spirit", right?

46

Sourcing made easy: Ken re-uploads a familiar imageimg and now gives Flickr as a source. Said Flickr photo was uploaded today by a completely new user and just happens to link back to his pet article. Hmmmmmmm...

12

TK has obviously been taking Andy's history course. He claims entrepreneurship is a conservative value and blames the current economic downfall on Government "stifling it for dozens of years"img Maybe he should be reminded who has been in charge for 20 of the last 28 years.

83

Andy confirms that "no Conservapedia contributors have mental problems!"img

20

TK breathlessly reports that Washington DC has higher Aids infection rates than West Africa,img pointing out that black men are most likely to be infected, and that only 3 in 10 use condoms. TK blames the "liberal government," and not the previous administration that worked on the principle of "keep it in your pants."

35

Andy says 'its a scandal, its an outrage' that a man was arrested for trying to hand Bill Ayers a Bible and a copy of Atlas Shruggedimg. Without mentioning, of course, that the article he uses as a citation says the man fully intended to disrupt Ayers' speech, made a "rude gesture" involving his middle finger, resisted arrest, and had previously caused problems at every one of the 4 speeches by Ayers at the same institution.

71

Andy, again, makes up some utter bullshit and sells it as "CONSERVATIVE TRIUMPH!"img

31

Andy - doing his best at "teaching". Bonus lulz for Andy stating that "two" is equal to "several".img

51

FredFerguson departs with a Parthian Shot and a warning for parentsimg. JY23 preserves the best bits in Conservapedia's Museum of Good Senseimg. Fred gets blockedimg for use of an ad hominem argument. (Full text here)

31

Following last week's standoff between RW and JessicaT, perhaps realising the hypocrisy of the situation (see WIGO's below) the kitten retracts her claws.img Domou arigatou gozaimasu!

21

Joaquín makes a proposalimg. Does he have anyone in mindimg?

28

Conservapedia 101: make up the conclusion, then pick and choose the evidenceimg Update: Explicitlyimg approvedimg by senior sysop TK.

67

TK shows that perspective is everything as he grabs LArron's rangeblock summary tableimg to demonstrate how CP only blocked 0.328% of the entire Internet: 10,513,786 IPs on a site with 28,132 users and 607,279 edits.img "Proof of hysterical, deceit-filled caterwauling by vandal sites" indeed.

24

TK (who regularly deletesimg his talkpage or has it deleted by request) forbids a user from nominating the user's own talkpage for deletion by reverting the request and then protecting the page. Oh, and then he bansimg the user for requesting this. And then deletes it anywayimg.

14

The WHO reports that the British health care system is better than the U.S.'s? A liberal view, irrelevant and not credible.img The lib-burr-rul New York Times, well known for being unable to tell a news article from a cowpat, digs up dirt on a Democrat? Flash it all over the main page.img

81

MikeSalterimg goes out in a blaze of glory. MOAR: He's not just a vandal, he's a traitor!img

-9

Was thisimg obvious enough? Perhaps not, but with our help, even TK has a slight chance to see the evidenceimg. We'll miss him, another musician down.

9

Jpatt is veering dangerouslyimg toward word salad territory.

-15

Karajou tries to lighten things up a bit.img

81

Is it doublethink or just plain idiocy? Jessica: "Members of vandal sites will be blocked."img - Jimmy: "But... you're a member there, too, so you should also be blocked!"img (*blocked*img) - Jessica: "Nuh-uh! Only those who vandalize and brag will be blocked."img - John: "So what about the guy who made no edits here and didn't brag there?"img (*blocked*img) - Jessica: "He's a member of a vandal site! Guilty by association, duh!"img

9

TK: Police union accuses Bill Ayers of murder.img He does not bother to mention that, according to his own source, the accusation rests solely on the word of a confirmed wingnut who is affiliated with these people.

-17

Because you support A museum constructionimg that brings in jobs, you're a liberal according to Saxplayer.

59

UN diplomats in New York don't pay parking tickets? Outrageous!img US diplomats in London don't pay parking tickets? La la la la! I can't hear you!img Update: As always, TK wins the argument.img

43

No matter how hard parodists might try, they will never reach TK's level of creepiness/WTF: "The clock has been started, AndyJM. When you hear the bell, please don't ask for whom it is tolling. It will be tolling for you." The reason for the message: AndyJM didn't mind his own business.img UPDATE! AndyJM jumps! To AndyJM: the communist liberal fascist trolls of RW invite you to join them in destroying all hope for humanity. Bring your own goat. THE END! bannedimg (with several IP range blocks), burnedimg, and saltedimg! Damnatio Memoriae!

73

Andrew Schlafly, wearing black?img Say it aint so! He must be one of them dangerous atheists!

20

The Democrats are trying to attack Rush Limbaugh!img How petty and stupid can you get? (It is, of course, perfectly all right for Mr. Limbaugh to attack Joe Biden by claiming he has an I.Q. of 32%, since when was I.Q. a percentage point, though?)

-15

Joaquín is either very clueless, or very cruel, but either way, it's a bit harsh to tell somebody to recreateimg their account, with account creation disabled.

78

In-depth news analysis, Schlafly style: A man who dresses in black must be an atheist.img Maybe Andy should double check his sources. UPDATE: This issue is raised; Andy responds, "Liberal denier! Intent does matter!"img Someone should change the newsbite to read, "Wearing all black with anti-Christian intent is characteristic of anti-Christian belief systems." More, More: You dare to point out the hypocrisyimg of the great and powerful OZ Schlafly? Away you go!img

20

The corruption of JessicaT beginsimg. Blocks of TK, conservative, Iduan, Ed Poor, and CPalmer expected to follow (some help for you Jess). UPDATE! I found another one! MOAR: We still love you, Jessimg, but could you "un-TK" that post?

11

Template:Pascal on depravityimg: Quick, who do you think came up with this one?  I'll give you a hint: It's a two-sentence quotation linked from exactly one other article.  If you guessed User #188,img you're right!

10

JM completely gives in to Ken's willimg and now also moves the Masterpiece under "Ken's Article of the Year" and "Article of However Damn Long I Wish". Update: So who is left to oppose the seemingly unstoppable force that is Ken? Why, the one truly unstoppable force on CP: TK!img

-34

Obama's acting stupidimg when he unbans funding for embryonic stem cell research right after a major breakthrough with the adult ones. Conservapedia probably would have thought this of that stupid man who invented the light bulb right after a major breakthrough in gas lighting technology.

3

Al Gore has the "closed-minded dogmatism of a religious zealot"img. Well, if there's one thing Andy knows... (Note his bolding for emphasis.)

4

Per Andy, genocide didn't occur until the 20th Centuryimg Oh, really? Of course, Israelites killing every man, woman, and child in the city of Jericho wouldn't count, presumably because they didn't have any notion of "survival of the fittest", only "survival of the divinely favored".

86

Psst! Andy! Want to know the real reason gun control would have been impossible in feudal timesimg? They didn't have guns.

44

FredFerguson firesimg off a logical answer to Andy's taunts. We know how this will end, right. MO': ArthurA has the audacity to present a factimg from a book of facts. How will Andy respond to this incursion? MOAR: Andy has determined that CIA is part of the Government and therefore not a "Trusworthy" source unlike the FBI. He follows that up with something straight out of the quote generatorimg

29

Senior Sysop and Schlafly's right hand TK: "Oops!img *giggle* I seem to have deleted the Main Page talkpage - againimg - and I don't know how to undelete it! Silly me! But it's not like anybody will miss the talk page history, anyway! Transparency!"

12

Our Glorious Leader hard at work. Despite being busy writing his lecturesimg, comrade Assfly still finds time to joke with one of his men and complimentimg him on that dissenter he executedimg last week.

20

Following up on his declaration that opposing classroom prayer makes you Anti-Christian, Andy defines "moderate" as "someone who favors abortion and/or supports censorship of Christianity in some ways"img

27

Sorry, Ed, but in the few days between his postimg and your reply,img your new best friend ShawnJ got banhammeredimg by TK for complainingimg about his user page deletion.

24

Ed Poor (aka Wikipedia User #188) creates a new articleimg by copypasting a sentence from the organization's completely unbiased mission statement - and manages to get their name wrong on both occurrences.

9

School textbooks are flawed and distort religion.img By which DeanS obviously means that they don't conform to Conservapedia's exacting standards in these matters.

10

Jpatt, waxing lyrical on the "strength's" of "school book curriculum," forgot to turn the grammar checker on.img

18

It's Andy Insight Time! We can never proveimg whether God exists or not. (Obviously Andy should read his own blog encyclopedia occasionally.) Also, atheists only exist because God was a dick and didn't reveal himself to them, and "real atheists" won't oppose classroom prayer.

26

TK: Admitting legal immigrants to the United States somehow constitutesimg levying War against them, or adhering to their Enemies, giving them Aid and Comfort. Now if only we could find the people who let TK's forebears through and lock them up for treason...

12

READ ALL ABOUT ITimg: OBAMA PREPARED TO ISSUE EXECUTIVE ORDER TO LIFT BAN ON FEDERAL FUNDING OF STEM CELL RESEARCH. Clearly Conservapedia is so excited about all the lives that could be saved with the new research, they wanted to shout it so loud that Bush could hear it all the way in Crawford! (and cry afterwards).

14

Andy: Kathleen Sebelius didn't show up at a health care summit (because she is still doing her job prior to confirmation), therefore Obama's pulling a fast one!img

33

Reason #832 why TK is Andy's favorite: TK: "ShawnJ, your userpage violatesimg the 'You must only say positive things about CP and its sysops' commandment!" ShawnJ: "Dude, overkillimg much?" TK: "You're luckyimg that I didn't ban you! ...on secondimg thought, that gaveimg me an idea..." EXTRA LULZ: TK's comment, before blocking with email disabled, was "If you want to be unblocked, you can ask Andy to do so." In any case, Andy doesn't receive email.

41

Well-documented statistics expert Andy Schlafly questions the statistical knowledgeimg of Richard Lenski.

13

Pointingimg outimg that Conservapedia lies, misquotes and is utterly clueless about material it posts on its Main Page with your well-cited evidence gets you absolutely nowhereimg. Of course. Plus ça change?

51

Andy: Obama's a dirty liar. He pledged transparency, but keeps his summit shrouded in secrecyimg Anyone could have missed the White House sponsored live blog and streaming video They were only linked from the main page of Whitehouse.gov Update: Hsmom pointsimg this out. (WIGO much?) Andy: Live streaming!? Maybe good enough for a libelous liberal, but I want MOAR!img

19

Irony or futilityimg?

9

Silly troll, CP doesn't want to hear your opinion,img even though it's a debate! Theimg answerimg "no"img isimg unacceptable.img

72

Andy doesn't want the US healthcare system to become as 'bad' as the UK'simg....that's right, the one that's ranked 19 places above the US by the WHO!

8

Giving his best to prevent non-sysops from feeling like a part of CP, TK has decreed that only Higher Beings may actually voteimg on Featured Articles. The lower class can postimg on the talk page (where sysops can easily ignore them).

40

Horsey DEAD?img I beat it!!!img Update: Hsmom realizesimg that she is now the sole voice of sanity on the Main Page talk page, to which TK says "Too bad!"img "I have sent you a very important message."img Because the natural place to discuss on-wiki issues... is off-wiki.

5

SJohnson pokesimg Andy.

56

Jpatt tries to argue about the scienceimg...to say he gets it completely and humiliatingly wrong would be an understatement...

16

Jpatt tries to link the Chinese year of the Ox with tax avoidance...and failsimg...who would have thought it

68

Do not think!img Conform to the Lecture!img Conservative Gradingimg, perhaps?

-21

Professor Dandy Andy employs Conservapedian mathematics while grading Student 8img's homework to prove that 60/70 = 100%. Or are boy answers worth more points than girl answers because girls are bad at math and won't recognize that they're getting shafted in the work = score department?

8

Jpatt, in the midst of wikilinking almost every word in his newsbite that is an article title, links toimg an article about the wrong Duluth.img

11

Ken breaks out the thesaurus and takes 14 edits playing with the big words.img

7

Ken wonders if God is popularimg at CP.. Nahhhimg! Well fine, he is.. he's even more popular than homosexuality!img (and we all know how Ken loooves his homosexualityimg).

7

Meet Sjay, spin doctorimg for college dropout Sean Hannity and against college-educated Jimmy Wales.

20

What took you, TK? After making a few too many rational edits to "Global Warming"img, RobertWDP gets a 1-month blockimg for "adding Euro-Socialist group think to this encyclopedia."img UPDATE: Your talk page is your castleimg unless TK decides otherwise.img

40

TK seems to be about to deep-burn some comments about whether edits to Conservapedia constitute a violation of federal law 18 USC 1030. There's been quite a dust-up on the Commandmentsimg talk page about this issue, and it may become the next FBI incident. The burned material has been saved here. UPDATE: PJR has restored itimg. PJR, you know that TK has de-sysop'ed more powerful people than yourself, don't you? There's MOER: TK revertsimg PJR's reversion. - EDIT WAR? MOAR: Hsmom joins inimg.

31

Jpatt: "Dear Robert,img you are obviously not aware that our Global Warming page is really the Anti-Global Warming page, so please stop inserting inconvenient facts into it. However, you can create an Anti-Anti-Global Warming page."

9

March 1: The day JM became Ken's bitchimg and moved the community's (sort of) "Weekly Featured Article" under Ken's "Article of the Year" and "Article of However Long I Want".

52

After Ed Poor opens a commentimg with a vague criticism of Dear Leader, TK decides that new user Umlaut wrote it, and makes a thinly-veiled threat to ban him in the same editimg. Update: One commentimg later, the guy gets a 3 month blockimg despite PJR's best efforts.img Update of Doom: TK removesimg Ieuan's analysis and then declares the discussion to be over by archivingimg the rest of the page, leaving nothingimg behind. Mandatory update: Wheelimg Warimg with quality edit comments like "the comments were removed because they were trolling, and offered by a non lawyer on a technical matter, so therefore gibberish". A cookie to the brave soul who tells Andy that during the next Lenski Incident.

24

Etiquette Guideline: "If in doubt, discuss before editing!img 90/10 Rule: "Discussing is talking; talking is bad!"img So does it really surprise anybody that you can get a 90/10 banimg for pointing outimg flaws of Ken's pet article?

20

TK shows his community-building skills: "Oh noes! People are trying to participate! How can we fix that?"img

-82

We found a witch! May we burn herimg?[2]

26

Andy fixes liberal placement biasimg - which was introduced by liberal... Ed Poor?img