Conservapedia:What is going on at CP?

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Keep up to date with what is going on at the extremist blog Conservapedia with our rolling reports of the bizarre happenings there. We report; you decide which entries make it to the Best of Conservapedia! If you are contributing for the first time please read the instruction manual. For the older entries, see the archives.

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What is going on?

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January 2019

18Damn. Killer of Davis, CA cop was not a Muslim. But California has legal pot, so that must be it.img
19Conservative surpasses 200,000 editsimg, making him responsible for around 13.6% of all edits on Conservapedia (1,470,640 total).
29If atheists truly believed that dogs had personalities, then why do so many atheists in the world eat dogs?img
39Increasingly liberal! Andy marches Mormonism out into the parade groundimg, rips offs its epaulettesimg and breaks its sword across his kneeimg.

December 2018

84O Canada! Your bacon is too liberal for Andyimg.
Update:  K e n  D o l l  ejaculates, "Americans need to build a wall and make Canadians pay for it. There is too much Canadian beer, Canadian bacon and syrup pouring over our border!"
Consistent with the high level of machismo, the comment was deletedimg as soon as the gay bowel started expelling the contents of the previous meal, so that the physically-unattractive, bulging tummy could be once again be refilled by copious amounts of fatty 🍁 Canadian 🍁 food — for just one last time only, seriously, before the promise is made to actually stick to all those grandiose resolutions about exercise and diet for real. But first, those obsessive-compulsive urges must be satisfied — the phone call on the Red Telephone just has to be made. Exhaling to reduce that belly protrusion as much as possible, and awkwardly stretching away from the keyboard past the brink of tears, the scarlet handset gets picked up...
74Andy: "Hard-charging Nick Ayers, who sought to remove Never-Trump Republican congressmen" set to replace "moderate" John Kelly, as Chief of Staff.img
Also Andy: "Never Trumpers are working together, as Nick Ayers sets up Trump for embarrassment by declining the Chief of Staff position.img

November 2018

91990’sguy outdoes Al Gore's Inconvenient Truth on Donald Trump's gut feelings about climate change.img
74"Son of Man" is a common mistranslation, preferred by liberals, which obscures Jesus's divinity.img
A better English translation which conveys the divinity would be "The Son as Man." An example illustrates why.img
Has the text of the Conservabible been made consistent with this amazing insight, as conceived by "The Man as Fly"?
74Does the CIA control mainstream media?img
Possible solution: Let the media ’pedia be handled by the FBI instead.
84Ken reminds us why we love him so muchimg Don't go changin'!

October 2018

74Pittsburgh synagogue shooting: That didn't take long!img
74RobS blinds us with more of his laser sharp analysis — "the crash of 2008 was definitely caused by outmoded Marxist theory and affirmative action policies in lending."img
74October 21, 2016:, totally not  K e n  D o l l 
spamming the WIGOCP talk page with the
usual argumentum ad Google Alexa ranking
October 21, 2018:
Combination of the cropped screenshots of Alexa's page on Conservapedia's traffic statisticsimg taken on October 21, 2017 and October 21, 2018.
See also: Analytics for Conservapedia for July 2017 and July 2018 according to SimilarWeb.
This shite is growing rabidly!
84Andy: "...the Trump Administration has been the most ethical in more than a generation.img
I need a new irony meter.
74Five MPR stories in a rowimg about Elizabeth Warren and her DNA tests, because there is nothing else going on worth discussing.
74"Family-friendly" in the Trump era: RobSmith invites a username troll likely idiot commie lib to go gang rape Michael Avenatti for kicks.img

September 2018

We're so sorry to hear about this. Most people — straight or gay — would not have experienced horrors like this, and thus kennot fully understand how terrible it must have been to cause one to think this way.img
 K e n  D o l l : It is not Conservapedia's fault that most gay bashing is done by homosexuals.img
It remains a mystery who are among the few people at Conservapedia who frequentlyimg does this.
December 2018 update:  K e n  D o l l  feels the urge to tell us more about "Homosexuality and Parasites"img and the "Gay bowel syndrome"img.
79Background: Context regarding the Question Evolution! booklet.
Question Evolution! makes another appearance, to be immediately nukedimg
74Christine Blasey Ford's problem is simply a misunderstanding by a teenage girl.img
94Andy, whose own site has blocked most of the world until the entropy death of the universe, is, of course, pissed that Twitter blocked arch-troll and conspiracy nutimg Alex Jones.

August 2018

74The reason that people are calling for Trump to resign isn't because of the corruption recently unveiled, and calls for Pope Francis to resign aren't because of child sex abuse scandals. It's because evil liberal media hates pro-lifers!img
79The Theory of Relativity cannot be reconciled with the Second Law of Thermodynamics. Search and both [sic] and the lack of reconciliation is striking. The Book of Genesis describes a fundamental underlying uncertainty; the Theory of Relativity denies it.img (FSTDT link)
  • [T]here is a big difference, in scientific and mathematical articles at least, between what is above the Table of Contents (TOC) and what is below. The material above the TOC is the property of Andy. Ordinary people may not change it, however strongly they disagree. I have had a number of my above-TOC changes reverted by Andy. Material below the TOC is maintained by regular contributors, and is generally left alone if it is well-reasoned. Perhaps the best example of this is the end of the first paragraph of E=mc².
  • I did the search, and I don't see a "striking lack of reconciliation". In fact, the 1933 R. C. Tolman paper seems to show that people (much more knowledgeable than I) have thought about such a reconciliation, and have not come to the conclusion that one or the other of those theories must be false.
    Whether Theory X and Theory Y are consistent with each other is not determined by doing a Google search for "Theory X" + "Theory Y". That's not how science works.img
  • Reinhold Niebuhr Quote (well, paraphrase):
    God grant me the serenity to accept the things that are above the table of contents, the courage to change the things that are below it, and the wisdom to know the difference.
    What does that refer to? It refers to the fact that someone recently added some sycophantic rubbish to the Second Law of Thermodynamics page. Fortunately, it was above the TOC, so I didn't have to move it.img

Update: The fake news of the 1919 eclipse, and how media ran with it, hardly seems to be of encyclopedic value in a scientific entry.img
74John McCain passes away, and Conservapedia’s only acknowledgment is a quoteimg from a man who despised him.
74According to Andy, a former Georgian Democratic candidate shooting her lover is a good argument against gun control.img
2018 California wildfires
The wildfire in California being man-made disproves global warming.img
Reality: California fires suspect was possibly mentally ill, and loved Trump "prophesies", Infowars and QAnon.
Andy: FACEBOOK!! It's all about FACEBOOK!"img
79Like other aspects infinity, the concept of infinitesimal offers a powerful way to solve problems and even handle stress.
The often-scarce resource of time, for example, becomes infinitely abundant if divided into infinitesimal segments.
Jesus introduced the concept of infinite time, or eternity, and infinitesimal time follows from that.img (FSTDT link)
74Pope Francis goes against 2000 years of doctrine by changing the catechism to oppose capital punishment. 😠 Religion needs conservatism, too.img
If only he had opened his mind to the truly conservative bible, such liberal distortions might not have overcome him.
Mystery: If the theory of relativity leads to moral relativism, ... does opposing capital punishment lead to opposing capitalism??? ☭😱☭
79RobS: "I'm so batshit insane that whenever CNN appears in my recommended links, I report it as hate speech..."img
79Peter Scholze, Alessio Figalli, Akshay Venkatesh, and Caucher Birkar win the 2018 Fields Medal.
We eagerly await the official announcement of the recipients of the Fields Medal's merit-based alternative — which winners are announced at the same time so that real achievement is recognized — the ConservaMath Medal 2018 2014 (not awarded yet) 2010 (which Ben Green seems to have won, but more nominations and insights are certainly welcome).img Hopefully, neither a woman, nor an Obama-supporter, nor a communist-trained Việt wins (not racist, you politically-correct trickster!), and the liberal claptrap based on the Fields Medal would be eliminated forevermore.

July 2018

74Evil liberal media and the CDC both work to conceal that the US didn't have West Nile virus two decades ago.img
74 MPR - What the mainstream media isn't fully covering:img Karajou is neither paranoid nor racist!img And fuck you, RationalWiki!
84 After the Trump-Putin summit, Andy Schlafly defaults to the most natural analysis of this meeting, namely, that it is a setback for the homosexual agenda.img
Seems like there's only the "homosexual ajohnda" and the "homosexual akenda" left to tackle, then.
79Preserved high in the Alps by a massive ice storm 5,300 years agopart of the Great Floodmedia reports on the last meal of the "Iceman" without any mention that he died at the time of the Flood.img
79Infinite descent Wikipedia's W.svg: The insights from an approach of backward descent is hinted at in logic referenced by Jesus: 'Jesus said to them, "Truly, truly, I say to you, before Abraham was, I am."'
Jesus did not say, "I was," as one might expect, but rather "I am." In other words, unlimited infinite descent is available to Jesus, just as multiplication of the loaves is.img

June 2018

79"Collection of atheist fat cat articles"img
74Will liberals abandon the religion of science after it proves they're psychotic?img
84Lacking in 👻 soul 👻, U.S. football soccer failed even to qualify for the World Cup this year.img 😢😞😭
But why would patriotic Americans want to excel in such a low-tech, socialist, unintelligent, socialist, European statist, and socialist sport?
99Liberal bias is the reason why anyone who questions relativity is unlikely to get a high school science teaching job, much less a PhD or college faculty position.img (FSTDT link)
109"Those Google Chromebooks are a dangerous Trojan Horse for leftist politics in education. They also directly steer their users toward the kinds of job assignments a Soviet employment planner might make."img (FSTDT link)TerryH once again proves Poe's Law with a conspiracy-laden postimg about the evils of giving Google Chromebooks students and how it leads to a one-world government.
109RobS: "I'm so batshit insane I'm going to casually blame Wal-Mart shoppers for the North Korean nuclear threat!"img
Pokeria1: "Hold my beer..."img
74The pedo congressional candidate is evidence of the dangers of the mental disorder of liberalism.img

May 2018

79Karajou shows his love for science by calling the scientific consensus on Global warming and Evolution "just a bunch of dimwits agreeing on something"img
79In the News talks about the 100% real link between irreligion and bad roads.img
741990'sguy's favorite approach to debate is deletionimg and more deletionimg.
79The approach of set theory also offers a powerful way to think about life, handle anxiety, escape addiction, and understand the miracles in the New Testament.img (FSTDT link)

April 2018

94Andeepak: The wave-particle duality is the same as God being a "wave" as the Holy Spirit, and also being matter in the form of Jesus. A open-minded appreciation of the wave-particle duality of the Trinity could have opened the eyes of scientists nearly 2000 years sooner to the fundamental wave-particle duality of nature discovered in the 1900s.img
Even today a more open-minded recognition of the truth of the Trinity would help scientists understand the reality of wave-duality.img (FSTDT link)
74Will the Toronto nutjob make Young Mass Murderersimg? Misogyny isn't a recognized "belief"; e.g., incel hero Elliot Rodgerimg was actually a video game victim. Similarly, Alek Minassianimg was primarily driven by dark clothing. There's still time to discover he was a Muslim or an atheist or an honorary Canadian Democrat.
74Conservapedian mathematics: Negative implication is an underdeveloped concept of logic that the existence of +1, for example, implies the existence of -1.img
Negative implication is required by the fundamental uncertainty discovered in quantum mechanics and described in the Book of Genesis, because uncertainty about "A" requires the existence of "Not A." (FSTDT link)
Mystery: "Mathematicians did not widely accept the validity of negative numbers until the 1800s", but did a certain trustworthy encyclopedia accept the validity of complex and imaginary numbers as recently as 2007?
941990'sguy blocks new user 1880'sguy for not using their real name.img

March 2018

74Unfunny and uninformative leftist YouTubers could never compete with the intelligence and wit of right-wing ones,img writes the intelligent and witty author of funny and informative masterpieces like "The transitional animal the flying kitty?" and "80k LOL".
74Conservapedia jumps on the bandwagon of comparing the pro-gun control protesters to the Hitler Youth.img
Austin serial bombings
and the fine art of dealing with inconvenient facts about the identity of the perpetrator while desperately playing the blame game.
Apparently the welfare state is responsible for the Austin bombings.img
Mystery: The perpetrator might have been a jobless slacker who lacked the Protestant work ethicimg, but was he jobless enough to be able to embark on edit sprees that last for hours days?
Update: Atheismdidit.img
Science journalism in action NASA Twins Study Verifies Long-Term Health Effects of Space Travel
NASA: [... A] subset of several hundred “space genes” were still disrupted after return to Earth.
The Hill: Astronaut's DNA no longer identical to his identical twin's after year in space
National Geographic: [Well actually, ... h]ere's how this works.


Setback for materialism
March 13, 2018: Conservapedia, the trustworthy encyclopedia, appears to be suffering technical difficulties.
99Burn the witch! Andy comments on LIBRUL Katy Perry and the sudden "mysterious" death of an elderly nun during a court appearanceimg after the nun previously accused her of witchcraft. "A scene out ofimg link The Exorcist".img
94Conservapedian mathematics: In addition, recognition of infinity — such as infinite time or infinite strength — is helpful on a personal level in dealing with adversity. Jesus emphasized the concept of infinity often in his miracles and parables. He rejected the mistaken view of the ancient Greeks that infinity is non-existent and unintelligible.img (FSTDT link)

February 2018

Stoneman Douglas High School shooting
The news the "MSM isn't fully covering" apparently includes the mass shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas School, Florida, which Conservapedia tackles with its in-depth 42-word report.img
Update 1: Champion creationist Ken DeMyer takes a mere six edits to post his revolutionary insights about the Parkland school shooting on Mainpageright.img Spoiler: Darwin diddit.
Update 2: Huh. We may have found something too batshit insightful for Andy to countenance on Conservapedia. TerryH goes full Parkland truther,img and Andy quickly paints over the stain with a fresh coat of WTF.img
109Most people who believe in the theory of evolution inevitably have bouts of depression.img
It may be that the only way to overcome that is to question the false belief system. (FSTDT link)
89Ken compares the British curling team's loss (to Sweden) to the American Revolution.img
84Terry goes on another bizarre rantimg on how transgenderism and homosexuality create "alternate realities" that can exploited by tyrants.img
741990'sguy compared the Conservapedia article on Wokeimg with Wikipedia's, and concluded that there was impermissible copying from Wikipedia.img No wonder 1990'sguy can't detect bias in writing.
89Dow plunges 666 points. Hmmm, 666???
Notice how most lamestream media headlines avoid saying the decline was 666 points.img
74Andy once again claims the credit for lower Superbowl ratings,img despite doing nothing except having an "Unplug the Superbowl" article (in an encyclopedia), which Andy last touched — prior to the Superbowl — in September.img
Mystery:img Is Conservapedia a playpen for approximately 56-year-old adults behaving in utterly infantile ways?
Conservative once again proves Poe's Law with his brand new front page articles on Atheistic Chinese Eating Babiesimg (not to be confused with atheistic Chinese-eating babies) and a page on a meme about atheists eating babies.img
Aaannnddddd they're gone from the front page.img Because Ken isn't totally obsessed with this WIGO page.

January 2018

99"Special" Forces: Ken DeMyer's SEAL Team Six clumsily shits all overimg the Main Pageimg with regards toimg the ugliness of atheists.img
Those who struggle with morbid obesity should remember that actions speak louder than words.img This also applies to those who delude themselves into thinking that discussing the obesity of others can somehow make one's own condition less severe.

Mystery: For a wiki whose notable editors release their photographs, why does this particular editor, who writes so much about the physical characteristics of others (notably, obesityimg), not release a photo of himself to the public domain? Was his undignified retreat from the January 2011 debate also partially due to his reluctance to appear on video as part of the debate conditions? As artificial intelligence is increasingly able to guess whether one is gay from a photograph, is  K e n  D o l l , the author of Summa Homosexualita, afraid that his photograph would become a data point in support of Haggard's Law — despite well-publicized attempts to inoculate himself against homosexuality? Are obesity and the opposition to homosexuals serving in the militaryimg reasons why this editor, rather than embarking on a real military career, pathetically attempts to make up for that by referencing notable figures in military history when writing on the Internet, all the while self-loathingly hiding his own face? Is this unwillingness to release his image because of the fear of exposing his own hypocrisy pertaining to physical unattractiveness, obesity and homosexuality, or because of his utter lack of machismo, or both?
September 2018 update: Admins posting obsessive-compulsive garbage on a talk page, or otherwise making Conservapedia look like a playpen for little children.img img