Fun:Roadside signs for Jesus

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If you run across a sign that looks like this, these were put up by a Middlesboro, Kentucky coal miner

Jesus commanded His followers to go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature. One innovative way of doing this is putting up Roadside signs for Jesus! The practice is something akin to spam on teh Internets, inasmuch as there is always that chance that somebody will see "Repent" and "Jesus Saves" so many times that one day the message will finally soak through their sinful brains, just as there is always that chance that somebody who sees "$$$$Make Money Fast$$$$" and "Enlarge Your Pen15" thousands of times may finally respond one day. These signs, or in some cases large crosses or hand-painted graffiti, can be seen all other the United States, where they undoubtedly lead weary travellers and wayfarers into a saving knowledge of the LORD. Sign, sign, everywhere a sign.

"And these signs shall follow those who believe..."

Notable signs for Jesus[edit]

  • The hand-painted "Trust Jesus" that seems to be on just about every Interstate Highway underpass in the country. Somebody obviously had too much time on their hands and no doubt provided a financial boon to paint manufacturers. The perpetrator is believed to possibly be from (depending on who you believe) the Champaign-Urbana area of Illinois since this graffiti is especially prevalent around the University of Illinois campus, or a former mayoral candidate from Portland, Oregon who was finally busted, but it is on highway underpasses everywhere from Maine to California. Some of it could be copycat graffiti from several different people but most of it is in an identical writing style.
  • Hand-painted "Jesus IS Coming" signs alongside Interstate 66 in northern Virginia west of Washington, D.C..
  • During the late 1980s, printed signs bearing the message "JESUS IS COMING R-U READY" in black block letters appeared on seemingly every telephone pole in eastern Tennessee. Apparently concerned that people didn't get the message, the sign was changed in the late 1990s to a more eye-catching (but equally ungrammatical) design in red and black bearing the message: "WARNING! Jesus Is Coming R-U Ready".
  • Large, hand-painted signs bearing messages like "Get Right With GOD", "If You Miss HEAVEN It's Your Fault!" and "If You Go To HELL It's Your Fault!" inside of a cross, heart, or cloud design, were the work of one Henry Harrison Mayes of Middlesboro, Kentucky, a coal miner (now deceased). These were put up in the 1960s and 1970s, mostly in the coal regions of eastern Kentucky, east Tennessee, southern West Virginia etc. and many of them are still up today. Mayes was featured in Life magazine and the Foxfire books for his efforts. He also put Jesus messages in bottles and made several concrete crosses which were supposed to be erected on the Moon by NASA so future astronauts could get saved. Much of his work is now on display at Tennessee's Museum of Appalachia as an example of religious fanaticism folk art.
  • The white signs with "BELIEVE On The Lord Jesus Christ" in italic blue letters, professionally printed on tin highway sign material, which are all over the Midwest and Pacific Northwest. Possibly the work of a Lutheran truck driver from Minnesota if the Lutheran Church (Missouri Synod)'s magazine in the 1980s is to be believed.
  • There was a large, bold white text on black background billboard stating "JESUS HATES PORN" outside of Greenwood, South Carolina during the early 20-Aughts.

Variations[edit]

Truckers! You can help get teh word out to the unwashed heathen too.
  • Rollen Stewart and his John 3:16 signs at sporting events.
  • There are trucking companies in Nashville and Oklahoma City who make all their drivers display Jesus signs on the back of their semis. One such sign you might see that makes very little sense but is on a lot of trucks says "His name is not 'The Man Upstairs', His name is JESUS. God's Word."
  • There are also the traveling Jesus vans and buses bearing large, hand-painted "Jesus Saves" and "Jesus Loves You" messages. They are usually rickety old vehicles held together with duct tape and layers of Jesus paint. These used to be associated with the hippiefied "Jesus Freaks" of the 1970s and may still be. Their purpose is to travel around the country wasting gas for God. Occasionally one of them will get out of their vehicle and start throwing Jack Chick tracts at anyone who ventures too close.
  • Jack Chick wants you to buy his comic booklets by the hundreds and leave them in highway rest areas, telephone booths, and on car windshields of cars you see with Darwin fish or Wiccan anything on them.
  • A neon cross with "Jesus Saves" on it, usually found in the bad part of town near the choo choo train yard, is a welcome sign of rest and sustenance for the weary hobo the railroad equivalent of highway Jesus spam. Notably its message is aimed only at those whose railroad travels are in the side-door type of Pullman who are assumed to all be alcoholics and ruffians, and not those in the plushy other type of Pullman, who are assumed to not need the message.
  • Megachurches are fond of erecting huge, lighted crosses by the highway for everyone to see from miles around.
  • Erecting large crosses and signs indicating God's disapproval of pr0n on the property adjacent to "adult bookstores" is also common. In some states like Ohio and Pennsylvania, as any good truck driver knows, seeing a bunch of signs like this (often with vague pro-family messages about how your wife and kids love you and miss you and please don't hurt us by looking at nasty magazines) means there is a smut shop at the next exit.
  • Throughout the Bible Belt and for some reason Pennsylvania and Wisconsin, the rural highways are littered with "pro-life" signs showing a picture of a baby, an unborn fetus, or a message like "Abortion stops a beating heart".
  • The Blessed Virgin Mary is rumored to be appearing in truck stops and highway rest areas. If, however, you have seen her while you are driving it is a pretty good sign you have a serious case of White Line Fever and need to pull over and get some rest...

See also[edit]

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