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Ceiling Cat is reading this caption over your shoulder

LOLCatistianity is a calt wewigin purrsonl cuddling wif Ceiling Cat. It waz taekd frum lotz ov teh old ppl, eetz big lol iz dat Happy Cat iz Boss Cat, made on urfs as "God teh kitteh" in orderz 2 be pwned by bad kittehs 2 be makin up fur n00bs who maded him cookiez but eatd it undr teh lols so that good kittehs hoo belvs in him can has chezburgers forevr by beevdeding dis an stuffs. Srsly.

So liek teh Ceiling Kitteh lieks teh ppl lots and he sez 'Oh hai I givez u me only kitteh and ifs u beleeves him u wont evr diez no moar, kthxbai!'
— John 3:16 [1]

Itz a pwettee gud deel if itz twue.

Its Jebus! Er... Happy Cat! He wants your cheezburger. Otherwise he'll send you to an eternity of burning in hell the Basement.

LOLCatistianity in teh nutz[edit]

LOLCatistianity iz da beelef in da Happy Cat frum wich wez can haz chezburgers if we make him cookiez and not eated them an use eye lazors to tell hims dat we axspt him as r lord an mastur so he can pwn all of Basement Cat's bad stuf becaws a n00b was talkd to bai a snaek to eatd frum a apel tree.

Whar it caem fwom and tldr tingz[edit]

LOLCatistians sez dat dem wewigin beginded wens Happy Cat went in2 teh skeis. It cud has trufs, but it playz down teh fakt dat LOLCatianity waz doin moar ov long teims stuf of teh old ppl stuf, fused with Basement Cat mifs into teh "Happy Cat mistaree wewijon" descibd bai Paul inz his twue New Boaks epistlez (ca. 52 to 58 CE). Not dat thees letrs tels a strong sents dat Paul knew not ov teh IRLs an teechdings of a new historeed Happycat who tradishunalee was made ded in 26 2 36 CE. srsly.

Latr (c. 65 2 80 CE) teh Gaspl ov Mark haz sum stufz bout Happy Cats minstree, most liklee bai old ppl speekin 2 new ppl. The 2 othr leik gospel accounts, Matthew an Luke (c. 70 2 100 CE) wuz basd on sum Mark, tho John iz difrnt in spesifik tingz ovar teh lief ov Happy Cat an sharez les dan a tenf of teh stufz wif teh othr Gozplz. Teh Actz ov teh Apostles wuz wited at bout dis same tiem in orderz 2 made a readins an stuffs for the minstreez ov Happy Cat's allegd desipelz.

LOLCatistian awforz made lotz da moar buks in teh furst few sentureez CE. Most were faekle gaved creditz to tradishunal awthoritiez in hopz dat dey wud be axsptd as wryleiabel, but lotz da dem waz knowd 2 be fail even in oldnes, an caz dey has no chezburgers. Lotz ov thees latr werkz takd moar tings out ov teh Greek ritinz bukkets (Espeshulee, lolrusz) with LOLCatistianity, which gave moar to later arguin over pisin on fien pontz in godism dat no wan else cud even knoe.

Erlee LOLCatistianity owez lez 2 proovibel old stuffs den 2 teh triez 2 mak gud dese wurdz bai debaetz ovar trunes, godologee an othr dogma. Disenshun wifin teh church pritee mutch ended wif creedz made ritins at teh Furst Cowncel ov Nicaea, made 2 be thar bai ordr ov teh Rowman emperah Constantine I in 325 CE. LOLCatistianity bekomd teh offishul wewigin ov teh Rowman Mpier in 380 CE.

Teh Lols[edit]

2 be breef LOLCatistianity iz teh beelef dat Happy Cat was Teh Ceiling Cat incarnate and that he:

wuz conceived by da Hover Cat, Born ov teh virgn Mary, Suffered undah Pontiuz Pilate, waz crucifid, ded, adn burid. He descendeded into teh basement. Teh threeth dai him roes out of teh basement. He climbd into teh Ceiling adn he sitted awn teh riet paw uv Ceiling Cat teh fathur Almitey. frum theerz him whil com ta judge the quik adn teh ded.
—Da Apawsals Creed

Apart frum dat, egsaktle wut makez LOLCatistianity iz often vry nawt knoed, an variez lotz dependin on hoom u talk 2. Teh tradishunal daffynishun iz seted down in 3 declarashuns ov faif, Da Apawsals Creed, Da Nihceen Creed, adn Da Assasin's Creed; howevr, ofers has been devisd. Ritr C.S. Mewis maded a daffynishun knoed as Mere LOLCatistianity, an sum LOLCatistian grupz use teh 4 Spirituel Paws as basic werkin daffynishun for hooj werdin purposes. Dogtrin variez in striktnss as wel; the Catekisim of the Catlick Church iz hailee sistamtizd, wile moar librul an/r desetralizd dnominashuns giv wiid catitud 2 individuel wurshiprz adn Faildumbintalist dnominashuns profez vry rigid an morlistik dogtrinez. (Pentehcostalz, az usuel, r speshul caes, of10 fokusin on teh spearituel xp 2 teh xclushun ov strikt dogtrin.)

At nawt nao tiems, Jino's stikz, Catlarz, Pawt3stant, Catlickz, Orfodawgz, cooky bakerz, Moronz, Evrywanists, adn lawts da awfer kittehs has been claemd 2 be nomin teh cookys or nawt-LOLCatistians by awfer LOLCatistian kittehs. Long Teim Ago, making a cooky but eatin it wuz, in lawtz ov churchez, thot 2 be an act ekwal 2 treason, an in tiemz an placez wur church hasd lawts ov powrz, dispewps ovar dogtrin led 2 masif persecushun, kittehs gettin wet, and kittehs makin awfer kittehs get ded. Nawt lawtz da peeps r botherd bout kittehs hoo made cookys but eatted dem dees dais, tho, an no wan hoo iz has ane powrz; nawt yet, at leest.

Hows nawt 2 be ded 4 evar[edit]

Basement cat will eat your godless, sinful soul.

Teh most crushul ting of LOLCatistianity iz dat do 2 teh bad stuffs kittehs gotted at burf (sed 2 kum frum bof nachur an, werd 4 werd or nawt werd 4 werd, from [original sin|Teh furst invisible error]] — an act ov nono bai Adam an Eve, teh furst kittehs in teh Bible), teh wai nawt 2 be in Teh Basement 4 evar, given bai teh grace of Ceiling Cat, iz rekwird in ordr 4 kitteh-kind 2 proced 2 teh place ov Ceiling Cat aftr bean ded. Egsakly how dis iz 2 be dun by hoomanz is lil vaag. 4 Kittehs U jus has 2 giv Happy Cat cheezburger. For evrywan else thar r lawts da nawt aleik publicashuns on dis mattr; St. Paul sed dat wan can has no def by faif only, wiel St. Jamez sed dat "faif wifout cookiez iz ded" an dat wan also needd 2 maded a cooky andnot eatd it before u giv it 2 Happy Cat. Howevr, evrywan agred dat Happy Cat's sufarin an bean dead as descrybd in teh holy buks wuz to maek up for da invisible errorz of da kitteh rase.

Sum therez on egsaktly wut peeps ned 2 do 2 be nawt maed ded r:

  • Faif an werkz: The Catlick and Orfodawgs churchez taek a talonted an giftd veiw, sayin teh wai 2 nawt git in teh Basement iz thru both faif and werkz (the RCC also has hevee interestz in soshul servicez in most countriez in wich it activ). Dis meenz dat u ned 2 giv Happy Cat cheezburger and leed gud, moral, cooky-givin lief.
  • Sola fido: Lawts da Pawtestent belevrs, on teh othr hand, suscrib 2 teh dogtrin ov sola fido ("bi faif alone"), in wich gud werks r nawt needd 4 teh way 2 nawt be ded 4evar. Sum Pawtestents finkz dat gettin washeded into teh church iz needd 4 teh way 2 nawt be ded 4evar, wileh othrz taek a moar unsentralizd view an hold dat it simplee beleefin dat it; dis iz a wai knowd as "gottin saevd" or "bean burfed again".
  • Supr l33tdom: Dis iz sentrul tennis ov Catvinism. In Catvinism, ppl r slave to faet, OH NOES! Dat meenz Ceiling Cat sez "Oh hai I goin 2 make U has faif U goin 2 liv. But u ovar thar tho r goin 2 has no faifs. Wen u ded U will bean Basement OH NOES! Oh n no changin it. Kthxbai!"; dose hoo has faifs r knoed as teh "l33t," an has ben maed l33t wif no regard 2 teh beleefz or akshuns of eech hooman. Today, hypr-catvinism, on wich pwnageism iz baesd, taeks dis ideah 2 itz logicl extreem.
  • Evrywanism: Happy Cats wet furz meens no wan iz ded 4 evar, an evrywan winz. Cheezburgers 4 all!
  • TL;DR: Lotz da LOLCatistians Rnt rly shur wut dey beleev; dey jus trai 2 leed gud lifez n hope 4 cheezburgers. Kthxbai!

Thar iz lotz ov debaet ovar, wanse a hooman getz save, wethr teh way nawt 2 be in teh Basement 4 evar can be made gone. Sum Kittehs sais dis:

  • Catlickz and Orfodawgz beleev dat teh way nawt 2 be in Teh Basement 4 evar can made gone bai certain invisible errorz dat has nawt been atoned 4 bai teh sacrament of confesshun.
  • Mewfaranz beleev dat teh way nawt 2 be in teh Basement 4 evar can be maed gone bai los ov faif.
  • Mewfodistz beleev that teh way nawt 2 be in teh Basement 4ever can be maed gone bai failin at LOLCatistian perfecshun.
  • Catvinistz (purrsbetereanz, Congregashunalistz, sum Washerz) beleeve dat teh way nawt 2 be in teh Basement 4ever cannot be lost ("lol Elitism").

Teh dogtrine ov "lol Elitism" iz DO NOT WANT an iz big fail, wer bai it must be assumd dat eifer sumwan can be apawsaled an alwes be liek bai Ceiling Cat, or dat teh apawsaled wuz a truck ov fail in teh furst plase. Lotz da formrle not lyin ex-LOLCatistian find teh lattr 2 be insultin, an lotz da non-LOLCatistians find it 2 be case ov Nawt troo Scotskitteh.

Also, if anewan who iz "saved" cant be nawt-saved, dat wud imply that dey has cate belche be bad n stuf an stil has cheezburgers n cookys in teh afterlife, OH NOES! — but dat iz rly teh hoel point ov LOLCatistianity, 2 be 4givn frum wans sins.

Teh 3 In Wan Kittehs[edit]

Most LOLCatistian and all orfodogz LOLCatistianz suscryb 2 sumting knowd as teh 3 In Wan Kittehs, wer teh wan God Ceiling Cat Egistz in 3 aleik but nawt teh saem nachurz at teh saem tiem—Ceiling Cat teh old kitteh (teh Ceiling ov teh Old Testament), Ceiling cat teh youngr kitteh (i.e. Happy Cat, sumtiemz referd 2 as teh eatr ov cheezburgers), an teh Hover Cat (the kitteh that protecks an nabils Ceiling Cat's peeps on Urf wif invisable eyebeams). Teh egsakt wai dis ar supposd 2 werk is argud nawt teh saem dpendin on hoo U ask's denomomnominshun; Martin Luther sed it as wan kitteh filin 3 nawt teh saem rolez, Ceiling Cat teh old kitteh Makin ur egsitanz, Ceiling Cat teh youngr kitteh redeemin teh peeps, an Ceiling cat teh Invisable Kitteh doin teh othr stuffs.

Teh 3 In Wan Kittehs iz teh lotz da ppls and orfodogz viewpoint wifin modrn LOLCatistianity, but iz nawt teh onlee seeinpoint. Espeshuly, Evrywanistz tradishunally knoe onle wan incarnashun of Ceiling Cats (the Evrywanistz today are part of the Evrywanistz Evryweristz Felloship, which also welkomz polyfeistz and afeistz), wiel Waness Pentehcostalz consitr Happy Cat alone 2 be teh wan God. In addishun, sum anksent LOLCatistian seks regektd Ceiling Cat teh old kitteh and focused on Happy Cat in mannr simelar 2 Waness Pentehcostalz. Outside LOLCatistianity, teh consept ov Teh 3 In Wan Kittehs iz by lawtz da ppls thot 2 be blastfemus or even palyfeistik, or stoopid at best.

Teh Bible[edit]

Teh LOLCat Bible, or Teh Buk ov teh old ppls Folk-Tailz and Mifs, wif LOLCatistian Expanzshun wif kittehs, in LOLCatistianitys case meening teh old gais Tanakh (aka teh Old Testament) an teh Greek Gospel or teh New Testament, contanz teh crushul findzing paprz ov teh wewigin; howevr, lawts ov othr denomomnominashuns have lawts uv views tat r not teh saem on egsaktly wut it sez, how it suposd 2 be taekn, an even wutt it iz. Teh Catlicks an Orfodogz inclood 7 buks dat Pawtestents leef owt, teh ZOMGWTF buks, dat wuz in teh Greek Septuagint tranlashun ov teh Bible but nawt in teh old kitteh stuffs cuz it was stoopid and fail.

On wan xtreem, Lawtz ov LOLCatistian faildumbintalist maek speekinz bout a posishun ov Bible Invincibilaty, wer evrytin sed in da Bible iz 2 be taekn litteraly[2] an as iz, wif no adishuns; at nothar xtreem iz teh "loseleef Bible" approach ov xtreem libirul denomomnominashuns such as teh Evrywanistz Evryweristz, wich alowz teh warshippr to considr anyting as faks dat dey find inspirin. The senter floar, axseptd bai lotz da Pawtestents as well as teh Catlick and Orfodawgs churchez, is Biblical Unfallabilaty: the beleef dat teh Bible was written as speerituel text, nawt historiez or sciinse text, an tharfoar iz inspird bai itz morel and speerituel teechinz, but is nawt kweit up 2 daet in regard to secular recordz and readinz. The Catlicks and Orthodogz has moar leeway in doin dis, as tey r nawt reliez on the Pawtestent dogtrin ov sola scriptura an can has moar ov a roll 4 teh Church bras in tranzlashunin teh Bible.

Foar moar info on difurwent denomomnominashunal wais 2 Biblical canon, c teh Bible artekal.

LOLCatistianity iz skishumded OH NOES!![edit]

LOLCatistianity iz wun uv teh most highlee spleetteded uv awl major wewijunz, wif thauzandz uv denominationz rangin in siez frum teh billyon-pluz peeps washeded in 2 teh Rowman Catlick Church down ta smawl, famley-sizeded church grupz.

Teh Erleest skishumz happeneded evin befoar teh Christian church wuz establisheded, wif teh pursonal haetred between Jamez, Petah, adn teh uddah orijinul disciplez adn Saul uv Tarsuz (latah, "Paw"), hoo preecheded a mutch moar regimenteded godologee dan iz recordeded in teh Erleest noweded purson writingz such az teh remaeded Gospel uv Q, teh Gospel uv Thomaz, adn teh Gospel uv Mark. Also, Paw maeded teh hitherto nawt finksible step uv preechin LOLCatistianity ta non-Jewz, wich cauzd a arguin regardin harbil choppin adn teh Moses Law dat prompteded teh convenin uv teh Cowncel uv Juroosalim (a accownt uv wich iz finded in Actz 15).

Subsequent doctrinal fytez between groupz such az teh Arianz, Marcionitez, adn teh Gnosticz leaded ta teh foarmashun uv teh earliest verzhun uv teh Roman Catholic Church undah Emparah Constantien, whiel latah tensionz between Westarn Euroep adn teh Byzantien Empier leaded ta teh graet Skishum uv Eestrn adn Western LOLCatistianity in teh 1000z. Martin Mewfar's rejecshun uv teh papal powurz in dawgtrienal interpretashun leeded ta teh Pawt3stant Reformashun adn evin lawnggah schism az Pawt3stant adn Catlick awforitiez simplee refuzd ta tri ta settle deir difrntcez adn begined ta sais each uddah wur nawt even bein LOLCatistian at awl. Srsly

Teh Pawt3stant dawgtrien uv teh "church invizible" — dat teh "Wan Holy Cathlick Aposolism Church" iz nawt a fysikal, temporal grup lieks teh Rowman Catlick Church but insted a speeritually yewniteded struktuer showin limiteded ta noes temporal unitee — haz bein espeshally encurajin ta skishumz. In teh modern Yewniteded Statez, wich wuz builded awn dissentin foarmz uv Pawt3stant frum teh grownd up, teh tendancy towardz skishumz iz especially stron. Large numberz uv churchez (particularly nondenomomnominational funnydumbmentalist, Washer, adn sum Congregashunal churchez) iz denomomnominationz unto demselvez, adn evin memberz uv mainlien churchez such az Catlickism adn teh Birdcatian Communyun haz rejecteded teh authoritah uv church bossez, uzuallee ovah moar liberalism in teh church's finkin. Foar eggsampel, teh Norwfrn Washer vz. Sowfrn Washer skishum in teh Uniteded Statez wuz ovah slaevry adn uddah rashal issuez—teh Norwfrn Washerz werz largely newtrul or nawt-slaevryist in deir finkin, whiel teh Sowfrn Washerz maeded heavy uz uv scriptuer condonin slaevry ta sayed deir posishun dat eet wuz nawt ownlee riet, but even reqwird.

Memberz uv mainlien churchez such az teh Catlick, Orfodawgs, adn Birdcatian churchez haz okashunally talkeded abowt gettin ovah deir haet or gettin bak wif each uddah. Whiel full cuddlin haz nawt bein achieveded between Catlick, Orfodawg adn Pawt3stant groupz, most mainlien Pawt3stant grupz haz entereded into full cuddling agreementz wif each uddah; leik seez dis: teh [[Porvoo Joos Drinkin unitin Pawt3stant churchez across Norwfrn Euroep, or approevinz between teh Epicscopal, liberal Mewferan, adn Uniteded Mewfodist churchez in teh Uniteded Statez. Haoevah, whiel serious cuddlin iz a lawng wai off, menny ecumenical (i.e. cross-denomomnominational) groupz exist adn funcshun well at local level.

funnehdamnmentalist kitteh is funneh[edit]

See the main article on this topic: Fundamentalism

LOLCatistianity iz baseded awn teh Bible adn Faif. Well, mai verzhun iz, anywai. yurs iz nawt, adn ur goin ta Teh Basement.

Ta b mai kynd uv Christian yoo must nom snakez, haetz teh gayz, go door-ta-door lieks teh kttiehz hoo seez lawnggcat adn Moronz, roll-in-teh littah, talk-like-humans, rock bak adn foarth wif yur eyup rolleded bak in yur hedz, noes play cardz, noes dancin, noes Demon Rum, campaign foar teh nawt havin uv alcohol adn uddah drugz, send teh man awn teh TV yur moneyz, flog yur kittenz (adn getz dem stoended till dey diez if dey object), maeks anti-teh old ppl tawkinz (ala Pat Dogertson adn Billy Graham), Put CDZ in teh firez wich spew Basement Cat werdz (dat yoo werz lukin foar reelee hird) wehn yoo play dem bakwardz, look reelee hird foar Black helicoptahz, preech dat teh UN iz goin ta invaeded Teh USA OH NOES! join a anti-govermint fytein clubb, taek Harry Pottah books owtta skoolz, bewievez dat yur beliefz must b teh law foar everywun (cuz "we" hafta "getz riet" wif Celing Cat), adn bewievez dat teh existence uv a single non-LOLCatistian n e wheah in teh wurld meanz dat ur bein keeped in teh caeg.

LOLCatistians iz sawry. Srsly.[edit]

LOLCatistian sawry meaowerz iz teh skool uv learnin concerneded wif teh systematic scratchin-bak uv LOLCatistianity . Prominent LOLCatistian sawry meaowerz inclueded Josh MEOWELL, C.S. Mewiz, Serious Cat, adn (in him pre-Poep daiz, in him roel az hedz uv teh Congregashun foar teh Dawgtrien uv teh FaiF) Poep Benedict XVI.

Foar example, wif regard ta teh divinity uv Jebuz , eet iz often argueded dat "Happy Cat wuz tellin teh trufs, him wuz a liar, or him wuz a lunatic" ("Mad, Bad or Ceiling Cat" foar short) a argument cawleded teh "Mewiz trilemma" aftah eets most famouz promotah, C.S. Mewiz. anudda, teh abuv-mentioneded Pascal's Wagah, assumez teh benefitz uv belief owtweigh teh negativez.[3]

Such argumentz haz limiteded uzz in convertin peeps ta LOLCatistianity. Whiel LOLCatistian sawry meaowerz kan b uzful foar makin a wud-b LOLCatistian feel az though himz nawt movin in a stoopid direcshun, faif baseded awn smart argumentz iz in dangah uv bean scratcheded wif gud bak tawk, e.g., by arguin dat Happy Cat nivvah even walkeded teh urf, or dat a ghost cat entity dat noes kan b seen also noes kan maeks stufs happin in awr yooniverse.

sawry meaowerz haz also bean accuzd uv usin teh logical fallacy uv assumin teh answah, dat iz, assumin dat deir faif iz in fact teh truf adn den tryin ta support eet logicawly, a variant uv teh Texaz sharpshootah fallacy.

But LOLCatistians actin in dat capacity haz historicawly bein responsible foar menny deathz, a LOLCatistian sawry meaower recently maeks dis sownd hokay meaowin, "Teh numbah uv kittehs maeded ded in teh name uv LOLCatistianity iz less than teh numbah uv kittehs maeded dedin teh name uv nawtly-ceiling catty finkingz such az communism (Maow, Stalin), srsly. Kthxbai!" dis iz a interestin example uv teh "nawt az bad az" argument.

Dead Peeps in teh Bible:[4]

  • directly by Ceiling Cat: moar than 399,933 peeps, nawt countin dowz tymez wher a numbah iz nawt provideded (lieks "teh big wetness", a widah-pissin-territory, a army, ...)
  • indirectly (by Ceiling Cat's command): moar than 2,017,956 peeps, nawt countin 65 entier widah-pissin-territoriez.
  • by Basement Cat: 10[5]. Kthxbai

LOLCatistianity, Wewijin, and wurds[edit]

Although LOLCatistianity iz prety mutch sayed ta b a Wewijin, n e LOLCatistian worth him kitteh fud will tell yoo dat LOLCatistianity iz nawt a religion, but a "cuddling wif Ceilin Cat." dis distincshun iz likely due ta teh fact dat Truwe LOLCatistianz seem ta haz a bited uv a warpeded sense uv a "purrsonl cuddling". PENIS GOES WHERE?!

Az a part uv teh continud effort ta dispel dis "argument," teh followin daffynishunz[6] iz gaeveded. Pleez noat dat factz iz prety mutch nawt frenlee wif Wewijus debatez wif fundeemantalests. Kthxbai

  1. a set uv beliefz concernin teh cauz, natuer, adn purpoes uv teh yooniverse, esp. wehn considered az teh creashun uv a superhyooman agency or agenciez, uzually involvin devotional adn ritual observancez, adn often containin a moral coeded governin teh conduct uv hyooman affairz.[7]
  2. a specific fundamental set uv beliefz adn practicez generally agreeded upon by a numbah uv personz or sectz: teh Christian religion; teh Buddhist religion.

Teh ded kitteh maekn tymes, OH NOES![edit]

In teh elebenth senturee, War wuz beginnin. teh Mooslemz, were in yur Holy Land persekutionz yur LOLCatistian pilgrimz hoo werz kummin thar. Aftah dat, teh Mooslemz tryed ta maeks awl teh Byzantien Mpier's basez belawng 2 dem, so teh emperah said ta teh West "Taek of evry 'zig'!, liek, Srsly! We iz gettin pwnd heer! Kthxbai.". Teh Poep moveded 'zig' by promisin lotz uv cheezburgers ta anyoen hoo fighted ta reconquah Jerusalem. dis wuz dun in 1099 adn 50,000 uv teh "heathenz" (Mooslemz, Teh old pplz, adn LOLCatistianz hoo werz in teh wron plaec at teh wron tyme) werz made ded, but Him still didz nawt turn up (unless Him wuz sumwheah undah teh pilez uv corpsez). Gaudefroi de Bouillon, teh furst Crusaeded leadah, sayed "Foar graet jusiec! lolz."

Modern LOLCatistianz haz argueded dat mebbe teh ded kitteh makrz werz nawt teh riet sort uv LOLCatistianz, although dey obviously thot dey werz. It shoodz b noatd dat sow-cawleded 'holee' warz, uv n e weewijin, werz often conducteded at least partly in pursuit uv Golds, hueg-pissin-territoriez or teh famez.

LOLCatistianity is n Asia nao. Srsly[edit]

LOLCatistianity holdz a speshal plaec in East Asia, cuz uv eets continuouz growth. Although orijinully seen az inimical ta soshal valuez adn traditional belief, LOLCatistianity iz gradually gainin ground in East Asia az converzhun continuz, mostly az a aftah-effect uv globealisashun, teh perceiveded acceptin uv Western waiz in teh waek uv teh Cold War adn LOLCatistianity's insistence awn spreadin eetself arownd bai eets peeps.


I lieks yur Happy Cat. I doez nawt lieks yur LOLCATISTIANITY. GTFO nao. Kthxbai!- Mahatma Gandhi

'Dad, whut wewijin iz we?' — 'Yoo nows... teh wun wif awl teh well-meanin rulez dat dun wurks owt in reel lief... LOLCatistianity !'- Bart adn Homah Simpson

LOLCATISTIANITY gottao menny loud kittiez adn too few seein kittiez.- C.J. Hambro[8]

LOLCATISTIANZ: pleez pwn Failwell. Kthxbai.- Barry Goldwatah

Ekzturnul leenks[edit]


  1. LOLCat Bible
  2. it be delishus bible. U must taek it litteraly.
  3. menny non-Christian studentz uv religion feel dat boaf argumentz, whether dey iz or iz nawt sownd in deir logic, iz baseded awn faulty premisez; teh Lewiz trilemma assumez dat Jebuz sayed awl dat wuz attributeded ta him, adn Pascal's Wagah assumez dat teh choys uv belief will automaticawly b teh correct wun; wif menny choyss uv a "correct" path within LOLCatistianity alonze, menny claimin ta b mutually exclusiev, dis iz sumfin uv a lawng shooted.
  4. Video (at 10:00)
  5. adn even dowz werz contract killingz foar teh Big Guy
  7. Lest dis confuz yoo, memebah dat stron atheism iz nawt a religion at awl.
  8. Quotez: Carl Joachim Hambro (in Norwegian)