Jerry Falwell Sr.

Falwell, in his post-segregationist/pre-death phase.

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“” The facilities should be separate. When God has drawn a line of distinction, we should not attempt to cross that line… The true Negro does not want integration… He realizes his potential is far better among his own race.

—Falwell from the 1958 sermon "Segregation or Integration: Which?", wherein he cited Genesis 9:18-27

“”If you had given him an enema he could have been cremated in a matchbox.

—Christopher Hitchens

Jerry Lamon Falwell, Sr. (1933–2007) was an American obnoxious theocratic segregationist demagogue who spewed narrow-minded hatred at every chance, while presenting himself as a pretender to the homilies of one Jesus Christ.

As the creator of the Moral Majority, he seemed to take inspiration from Billy James Hargis's "Christian Crusade". The general impression among people who are not his enthusiastic supporters is that he was a worthless prick; however, he was not involved in the sex or financial scandals that were the downfall of many of his contemporaries and his son.

According to Falwell, you should save what little forgiveness you have as a Christian for Saint Ron of the Reaganite's divorce.

Gays did 9-11

“”The abortionists have got to bear some burden for this because God will not be mocked. And when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, we make God mad. I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way — all of them who have tried to secularize America — I point the finger in their face and say "you helped this happen."

—Remarks to Pat Robertson two days after the WTC attacks, 'The 700 Club

Falwell got his first big win in 1981, after the city of Washington, D.C., briefly decriminalized gay sex. Falwell successfully lobbied Congress to overturn the decision, warning that D.C. would become “the gay capital of the world.” During the 1980s, he would describe the growing AIDS epidemic as both "a lethal judgment of God on the sin of homosexuality" and "also the judgment of God on America for endorsing this vulgar, perverted and reprobate lifestyle".

Falwell also blamed homosexuals, neopagans, and feminists for the September 11 attacks — and not, say, Christians stirring up a hornet's nest in Muslim countries by maintaining a military presence in the Middle East and propping up oppressive dictators. He is also known for claiming that the character Tinky Winky, from the children's television program Teletubbies, was a homosexual (for being purple, wearing a tutu, and carrying a handbag).

Speaking of minorities, Falwell was also a leading anti-Semite, claiming that the anti-Christ was a male Jew and that "Jews can make more money accidentally than you can on purpose."

Up your hole, with love, peace, and soul

Falwell engaged in a famous legal battle with Larry Flynt that went all the way to the Supreme Court. The case was focused on a satirical liquor advertisement from Flynt's Hustler magazine in which Falwell talked about his first time having sex...with his mother...in an outhouse. Despite the fact that the advert was clearly marked as a parody at the bottom of the page, Falwell sued Hustler for libel. The court delivered a unanimous ruling in favor of Hustler, declaring that the advert could not "reasonably be understood as describing actual facts about [Falwell] or actual events in which [he] participated", and that the First Amendment should take precedence over Jerry's hurt feelings. This established a precedent that protects the right to parody public figures. Falwell and Flynt later became friends when they discovered that they shared more in common than they realized, due to their similar Appalachian roots; Flynt even wrote a touching column about Falwell after he passed away.

Oogie Boogie, is that you?

Beginning in 1970, Falwell terrorized children annually with his Halloween Hell House.

Falwell promoted anti-evolution and anti-ecumenism beliefs, captured for posterity in a creepily charming set of songs, "The Monkey Song" and "The Ecumenical Movement", sung by young Crystal Bernard and her sister at one of Falwell's church services.

Legacy

Falwell died on May 15, 2007, proving that even God was tired of Jerry's claptrap. After his death, Christopher Hitchens hitchslapped him to eternity on Anderson Cooper's CNN program. The world moved on. De mortuis nil nisi bonum…

Falwell's legacy is Liberty University. He rose to national prominence when his other school, Liberty Christian Academy, prohibited non-white enrollment and, thus, lost tax-exempt status.

Liberty University was chaired by his son Jerry Falwell Jr. until Junior resigned in disgrace in August 2020. Junior is rather svelte to the point of being unrecognizable compared to his bloated, bloviated, (thankfully) deceased dad. Looks like the kid's voraciousness is presently limited to money and God (in that order).

Gallery

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  The horrid homosexual character pictured here is wanted by Jerry Falwell for leading children to enjoy rum, sodomy and the lash, with emphasis on "sodomy".

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  Falwell: the parody Hustler interview

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  Hustler v. Falwell: Hustler won

See also

• Pat Robertson, his former BFF
• Dominionism
• Fundamentalism
• Douchebag