User talk:Ace McWicked/Archive9

Killing

Ooh oh, Btw, after the discussion about brugmansia I thought of the most awesome way to kill someone you really REALLY hate. So you kidnap them, give them the Bond-baddie talk, and then you soak a brugmansia leaf, 5 castor beans, and about 1mg (yes, milligram) of Bromodragonfly, and a good amount of rohypnol (or similar short-acting hypnotic) in warm water for about an hour. Then you filter the mix, and draw the filtrate into a large syringe. Explain the victim's fate, and then jam the cunt with the needle. After about 10 mins they pass out, so you dump them in the trunk and then drive them into the middle of the largest forest you can find and ditch them. By the time they wake up the brugmansia and BDF will have kicked in and so they'll be having the most horrifically disturbing visions and nightmares for two days, alone, in the middle of the woods. And the castor beans will kill them before the effects wear off, so they won't be able to squeal to the cops even if they get found.

What do you reckon? It's all good, no? Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 22:42, 24 January 2010 (UTC)

Interesting plan however the burgmansia on its own can kill someone. When I was a young fool my one (and only) experiment with datura/burmansia resulted in a friend turning blue, fitting and foaming at the mouth. I was of course unaware of this due to looking for the cigarette I kept thinking I had dropped and then having a long conversation with the wall. He was lucky his sister came home or else he would have croaked it. Horrid shit.

When I was in Crete this guy who worked in a resturant would keep approaching me with plans to kill the local mayor who he percieved to have stolen his girlfriend. I would be walking along the beach and he'd come running out screaming "New Zealand! Hey, New Zealand! I have the most wonderful plan!" we'd spend many hours drinking and concocting strange murder methods. His favourite was to glue the guys hands to his steering wheel and his feet to the accelerator in his convertable BMW, then we'd throw molotav cocktails into his vehicle as he rounded a bend. Aceⁱ⁹ 03:38, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Hahahahahaha, I remember your foray into datura, the matriach was less than impressed.Rad McCool (talk) 03:46, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Frotting

So, uh... does that work? Just curious... SJ ^Debaser 11:35, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Imagine mutual masturbation, but it involves rubbing thingies together. Either the guys can hump eachother's sticks, or they can put them together and, well... instead of rubbing one out, they rub two out... at the same time. It's how gay people have sex without actually having sex. Sorry to intrude on a question directed at you, Ace, just thought I'd share my awesome frot knowledge. -Redback^{lurking around Matt's dustbin} 11:44, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Yes, I very graphically learnt about it here t'other day when Ace was kind enough to post a certain cartoon of two gay men in mutual, self-assisted masturbation. SJ ^Debaser 11:48, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

I saw that, then I saw it again at WP:Frot. -Redback^{lurking around Matt's dustbin} 11:51, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

from the French word Frottage - rubbing

It's not just a gay thing. A lot of frottage goes on in crowded underground/subway trains. I've lost count of the number of hard cocks that I've felt digging into my backside going to work in the rush hour.  Lily ^{Inspirate me.} 15:08, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

It's quite a girl:girl thing - possibly more than boy:boy? ^{I have just eaten} _& stilton^talk 15:14, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Girls can also frot - think of a pair of scissors. Aceⁱ⁹ 19:06, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

You're telling me? ^{I have just eaten} _& stilton^talk 19:08, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

(EC) Although that is called tribadism instead. ListenerX^TalkerX 19:09, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Has anyone told Ed about this? ^{— Sincerely, Neveruse / Talk / Block} 19:11, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Jesus fucking Christ...I should have known... ^{— Sincerely, Neveruse / Talk / Block} 19:13, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Almost scary that we can't out-Ed creepy Ed, isn't it? ħuman 00:50, 26 January 2010 (UTC)

I've got half the wiki talking about gay sex. I think my job here is done... SJ ^Debaser 19:14, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

We should change the name to GayWiki. Aceⁱ⁹ 19:16, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Or RationalWanki. SJ ^Debaser 19:22, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

ReciprocalWanki. ^{— Sincerely, Neveruse / Talk / Block} 19:23, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

tittybanging would be Frottage. Just to de-gay the discussion a little. Hamster (talk) 19:25, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Welcome Message

Thanks for the heart rending welcome, and now I know what happened to my other door.Little Bobby Oppenheimer (talk) 00:27, 26 January 2010 (UTC)

Ow!

I stuck my pinkie in your ear. ħuman 08:09, 26 January 2010 (UTC)

Pinkie = Cock? Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 21:22, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

Re: Welcome

Thank you for the friendly welcome. I probably won't be spending a whole lot of time here, but I figured I should get this out. The audacity of asking for donations while living in such an affluent home is astounding. I had a quick glance at your user page and I am happy to be in such good company. I am also a gun owner. --Pachavi (talk) 01:56, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

I do enjoy guns. Aceⁱ⁹ 01:57, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

Gun owners unite! --User:Theautocrat/Sig 02:00, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

Beer

Yeah, you want it don't you?

So here's a sneak preview of your Ace bottle. I know you want it bad, but you have to stop slagging off people from the United Republic Of Englandistan before you can have it. By the way, I was curious about the slight honey hint the beer has, and was met with the largest backlash ever from the homebrew community about how that's how 'proper' beer should taste because of all the spraymalt I used. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 21:21, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

As I explained to Toast - its not just "a Brit" I dislike but the society as a whole. Drove me nuts. So sue me. Aceⁱ⁹ 21:32, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

What was it specifically? Was it that everyone kept asking you if you were Australian? Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 21:36, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

P.S. How come you're online but not on Skype? Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 21:39, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

The accents, the fat pasty children everywhere, the jingoistic mutants at the pub, the queuing for everything, the scouse's, the television, the insistence of having Big Brother on 24 hours a day and then having it headline news, the rubbish cocaine, the inefficiency, the complaining if it being too hot, too cold, too snowing, not snowing enough, the British tourists fouling up my Cretan beach resort, "Hiya ya-right?", "'foopbawl!", the obesity, the teenage pregancy, the scags, slags, celebrity obsessed reality show watching bags of flesh. etc etc etc...No skype - I am at work. Aceⁱ⁹ 21:44, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

(UI)Hmm, let's break that down:

• The accents: Which accent in particular? I mena if you stayed in Birmingham or Newcastle then I agree. Otherwise what would you have against the accent?
• Fat pasty children: Oh I agree. Childhood obesity is reaching obscene levels here. We have a despicable attitude towards food and I'd love to be able to change that, but look at what happened to Jamie Oliver when he tried
• Mutants at the pub: Were you staying in Norfolk? If so then I can only apologise, otherwise you're going to have to explain
• Queueing: What's your point? We're British, we queue politely. You can be a French asshole and jump to the front if you like, but you will get glares!
• The Scouses: You can have that one. We have a scouse at work called Ken. Even he hates Liverpool. Everyone hates Liverpool.
• TV: What's wrong with UK TV? We have some awesome comedy programes
• Big Brother: Yup, I agree. Not for long though. Last BB is this year :)
• Coke: We are quite a way from Columbia and Cuba you know
• Weather: We have shit weather, we hate it, we bitch about it. Get over it
• Beach resort: Fuck off. If you think you're going to have a good time at a beach resort then you're either a chav or a moron who knows nothing about UK geography. We have many unspoilt beaches with nice shops and good seafood, but the tourists have no knowledge of them
• "Hiya ya-right?", "'foopbawl!": Is this another accent thing?
• Obesity: See above
• Teenage pregnancy: Why does that annoy you? We have loose bitches here, I know :)
• Scags & slags: Sorry, we aren't allowed to euthanise them. We'd like to...
• Celebrity obession: Again, agree. I actually found a pap-mag on the shelves the other day which didn't have anything about Peter and / or Jordan on it. I was so surprised I almost shit myself

Hope that clears it up. Overall I agree with most of your criticisms, and would love to emigrate. However, bearing in mind I know 3 families who emigrated to NZ and one who emigrated to Oz and they all came back, I do wonder what is right / wrong with each country. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 22:14, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

Points noted, its just a general thing with me. Just didn't like the way of life. Aceⁱ⁹ 22:32, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

That sounds like a challenge. You should come and stop with us for a few days, then we shalt travel to my birthplace and make a pilgramage to Brancaster Staithe to buy Mussels and Cockles from the local fishermen to cook marinier / italianto Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 22:40, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

Challenge accepted. Aceⁱ⁹ 22:45, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

R0x0r. Name your date. actually, how's about you and tehmissuz come stay on the weekend of the V-Festival (which is just up the road from us) and we'll all go to the Saturday gig and crash out at my place afterwards? Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 22:49, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

I'll let you know when I am in the UK next. Aceⁱ⁹ 22:51, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

You'll have to be more specific than that. The tickets go on sale only a few days after the lineup is announced. We've spent the last two years taking the opening-ticket-sales-day morning off work just to get 2 tickets. If you are serious then you'll have to show some committment. We're next to the Weston-under-lizard ground btw, not Chelmsford. Josh, I know you're reading this and if you're interested as well then you too are welcome. Single day tickets are about £70. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 22:57, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

ummmmmm, you do know that I live in New Zealand right? Aceⁱ⁹ 23:01, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

What's "New Zealand"? SJ ^Debaser 23:04, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

Ace, and? Spot the dates, book a flight to Birmingham. I'll pick you up. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 23:11, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

Why don't you come here? Aceⁱ⁹ 23:13, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

Because you don't have the V-Festival. I'd love to visit though when we get a chance. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 23:15, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

Its a little pricy for me to just jump on a plane to go to a festival on the otherside of the world. If you come here you can stay at mine. We'll get drunk. Aceⁱ⁹ 23:20, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

I know, I wasn't just suggesting a trip to the UK for one weekend, but if you're planning a holiday then consider the UK and make one of the weekends the V-Festival. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 23:24, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

w

174.22.67.138 isn't MC. -- =w= 01:15, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Who ever it is has been doing a great impression of him all day. Aceⁱ⁹ 01:16, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

The world is full of people who can do great MC impressions. -- =w= 01:33, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

& I agree with your "the jingoistic mutants at the pub" bit. -- =w= 01:39, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

174.22.67.138 is Qwest comms USA. I think that every country has its own jingoistic mutants whether at the pub or elsewhere. I'd suspect that MC's a jingoistic mutant who can't find anyone to be jingoistic with. ^{I have just eaten} _& stilton^talk 01:48, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Just a question

Why is it perfectly acceptable, encouraged, even, to ruthlessly mock Christians, Muslims, Hindus, Zoroastrians, Buddhists, Satanists, SubGeniuses and Shamans, yet if one dares poke fun at someone who worships Baldur's ivory horn, they're banned for it?

Doesn't make much sense to me.174.22.67.138 (talk) 03:44, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Because you pointedly did it piss LX off. Aceⁱ⁹ 03:46, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

It says right in his user page he's not bothered by people criticizing his religion, so perhaps you should stop putting words in his mouth. Besides, what of Christian/Muslim members who may be offended by the pages on their religion? Are they free to whitewash them? If we encourage double standards like this, we're just Convservapedia with a new skin, and that's not what we want.174.22.67.138 (talk) 03:51, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

If you want to criticize my religion, do it to my face; do not Make a Point over it by vandalizing the Wiki. ListenerX^TalkerX 04:38, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

So, what's on your stereo right now, Ace? The Spikey Punk ^{I'm punking my punk!} 03:51, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Nutty's voice. Aceⁱ⁹ 03:56, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Sounds like fun! Is his voice sexy or monotonous? The Spikey Punk ^{I'm punking my punk!} 03:57, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Sexy, and silky. Aceⁱ⁹ 04:11, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Thanks for removing the crap for the Asatru page. As for why it was uncalled for, it actually went further than many of the other pages, basically calling Asatruar Nazis. Researcher (talk) 04:38, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Don't mention it. Aceⁱ⁹ 04:43, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

RationalWiki, where it's perfectly acceptable to criticize every religion, except mine174.22.67.138 (talk) 06:25, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

More like: RationalWiki: Where we discuss the Super Bowl and Nutty Roux's sexy, silky voice. Lord of the Goons ^{The official spikey-haired skeptical punk} 06:28, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Feel free to criticize my religion. Hell, I do it all the time. Just don't call me a Nazi for it. Researcher (talk) 15:56, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

I wasn't actually calling you a Nazi, I was just pointing out the link between your "religion" and Nazism (Which is inarguable), the fact that is very similar to other branches of Germanic paganism, which have no such connection (Again, inarguable) and that you must be either a fool or a troll to willingly expose yourself to such a firestorm for a religion that is interchangeable with 20 others, and has no real teachings or doctrine anyway.174.22.67.138 (talk) 20:54, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

I think Odinism is silly personally but the point is maybe people would take you, and your contribs, more seriously if you were a little less acerbic, created an account and didn't act like a prick. Aceⁱ⁹ 21:02, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

In my experience, neo-pagans skirt questions of racism like scientologists skirt questions about Xenu. ^{— Sincerely, Neveruse / Talk / Block} 21:04, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

So then, Ace, if I was to register and remove the n-word from my previous edit, you wouldn't ban me for it? It would, even in that form, be less harsh than the treatment of Christianity and Islam. Also, I don't think the majority of neo-Pagans these days are racist, but it seems to me as being akin to wearing a white hood constantly because you're a fan of Casper the Friendly Ghost. It may be true, but that's a hell of a lot of explaining you'll have to do.174.22.67.138 (talk) 21:12, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

When did I ban you? If I did it was probably for about 1 minute am I right? If you want to write about neo-pagans go right ahead but you only did it to denigrate LisnenerX which makes you cunt. Aceⁱ⁹ 21:15, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Denigrating LX does not make you a cunt. It just means you're only human. ^{— Sincerely, Neveruse / Talk / Block} 21:20, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

I am no LX fan however its petty and childish to denigrate his beliefs in an article when you can call him out on his talkpgage instead. Aceⁱ⁹ 21:22, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

So Odinism is now beyond reach simply because one of our most prolific users is one? That's hardly fair, Ace. If I told you I was a red letter Episcopalian, would you whitewash the Christianity articles and ban the editors for being pricks?UncleHo (talk) 21:26, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

(ui) UncleHo, above you said something about mocking SubGeniuses, but who's doing that? It's the only religion with a money back guarantee. Corry (talk) 21:57, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Money back? Please, that's for lame and feeble religions. JR "Bob" Dobbs will offer you salvation or TRIPLE your money back. No other creed offers such a guarantee! Also, there are real women who may actually have sex with you at X-Day. You're not going to find that at the Vatican!UncleHo (talk) 22:01, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

The FSM does have a stripper factory when you die, though, next to the beer volcano. I am spiritually torn about this. Corry (talk) 22:07, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

I think I'm going to go to the Temple of Small Gods and see who has the best sales pitch. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 22:09, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Not only is Ho a cunt but he also appears to be unable to read. Write whatever you want about Odinism but you only wrote what you did to troll LX so I reverted your trolling. Understand? Excellent! Now fuck off away from my talkpage asshole. Aceⁱ⁹ 22:49, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

So where do you draw the line between criticism and "trolling LX" This is a pretty important distinction, by the way. Do you just want me to "fuck off your talkpage" because you feel uncomfortable for me calling you out? That is understandable, no one really likes being taken to task, but you should get used to it, I'm not about to stop.UncleHo (talk) 00:50, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

errr, no I called you out on trolling and now you are trolling my talkpage. Kindly fuck off. Aceⁱ⁹ 01:04, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

That's not a good answer. What is the line between valid criticism of Odinism and "trolling LX" in your mind? As I said, I'm not about to stop, so answering this question would be to your advantage.UncleHo (talk) 01:09, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

If you don't think its a good answer thats tough fucking tittie to you man. Aceⁱ⁹ 01:13, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

Well, you haven't reverted my edits or banned me yet, and I'm drinking Olde English now, so I'll assume what I have done is not considered trolling to you. I guess that naughty little N-word is the difference.UncleHo (talk) 01:17, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

There is no need to revert the edits of some lame ass troll. No reason to block you either, you are just a troll. Aceⁱ⁹ 01:23, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

ww

Sorry. I just had to tweak his nose. It's fun, you should try it! -- =w= 00:16, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

Meh, been there, done that. Aceⁱ⁹ 00:21, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

You're the third one...

(Don't ask what the "third one" means). Big thanks for your support! :) . I am quite lost in this wiki-thing anyway and it's a bit difficult if someone opens such "debates". Although you don't actually agree with me, it's a big help if someone's at least nice to me.

--Earthland (talk) 21:17, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

We are not CP and should not ban on a case of "Don't agree hence that guy is a dick and a troll" if you follow me.....Aceⁱ⁹ 21:23, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

Ace: We're not upset at EL because he holds a different opinion. We're upset at him because he becomes a big nuisance outside his essay. He's banned two people, me included, today claiming we're parodists, for example. --Irrational Atheist (talk) 21:25, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

Boo hoo. Aceⁱ⁹ 21:30, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

You're the one flying off the handle because people dared to want to do something about the turd. --Irrational Atheist (talk) 21:33, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

Flying off the handle? I am remarkably calm actually - leave the guy alone, don't be a bitch, fuck-face. Aceⁱ⁹ 21:34, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

Yes, flying off the handle. Oh, boo hoo, someone does something you don't like. Don't be a bitch, fuck-face. Oh, wait, it only works for others, not for you? If you don't like something, fine. But bitching that others don't do stuff you like, then complaining people are complaining about others who don't do stuff you like, is stupid. --Irrational Atheist (talk) 21:37, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

There are no grounds to remove EL. Aceⁱ⁹ 21:43, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

Then that's all you needed to say. Others disagreed. --Irrational Atheist (talk) 21:45, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

Most didn't. ħuman 02:24, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

Why the hate?

"You are strange and gay". And? Geez, just 'cuz my ass is nicer than yours.... LimpWrist (talk) 03:42, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

Ace has a nice ass, let's see the pics! ħuman 05:15, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

"Don't go ToP. I'll wither and die without you."

Fuck that shit. As we stay in French, "j'y suis, je reste." In other words, y'all are stuck with me. But this place needs a kick in the pants something fierce. TheoryOfPractice (talk) 19:42, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

Fucking tell me about it dude, RW needs tying down and to be threatened with water boarding and walrus rape if it doesnt start acting right. Aceⁱ⁹ 19:46, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

Walrus Rape?

File:Walrus rape.jpg

Like this?

TheoryOfPractice (talk) 19:51, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

Imagine, you are tied naked to a chair in some dimly lit basement somewhere. A guy wants the facts but you aint talking, blood drips from your broken nose and you are now missing all but 2 toenails but still, you keep your lips sealed. The guy nods to the men standing in the shawdows just beyond your line of sight. You hear a door open and something begins shuffling and moaning like a banshee on heat behind you. "Jesus, what the fuck is that sound" you start thinking. Terror begins ticking up the spine as the smell of rotting fish and seal envelops you. Suddenly you are pushed from behind, you fall to your knees and realise now there was a reason for the hole in the seat of the chair. With your anus exposed you take a look behind you, and fucking jesus, theres a goddamn walrus coming for me! It shuffles forward, emboldened by the fresh scent of fear and rectul juices. You scream, you plead, you tell all, but it is too late. With a giant howl the walrus thuds forward, its wobbly pink erection pieces the shadows and you feel two flippers crash against your back. Then everything goes dark. Aceⁱ⁹ 20:02, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

That sounds like one of the "stories" from a fetish website. I'm very hard right now. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 20:34, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

Its an awful, awful vision. Aceⁱ⁹ 20:35, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

What do you do...

...when you decide that leaving and never come back is seau last year dahling, but then everyone else does it around you? Totnesmartin (talk) 23:14, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

I write stories about Walrus Rape and hope for the best. Aceⁱ⁹ 23:17, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

My band used to have a song called How To Scare A Walrus. Totnesmartin (talk) 23:37, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

Story

Which is interesting. Maybe. I'm not sure.

I came back home last night (Saturday) for my brother's party in London, which was fricking awesome. I paid for it quite badly today as it felt like my brain was in danger of shitting out of my ears, but it managed to stay in. Anyhoo, that was the third night on the trot I'd been out drinking, and tonight (Sunday, if you know your days o' the week) was the fourth. Now, me being home for the weekend, I went down the pub with a few mates of mine I hadn't seen in about a month which was good fun. One of them knows in a vague and uninterested manner about my activity here on teh RationalWiki (actually creating an account about 6 months ago which he hasn't used since) and I told this gentlemen about you informing me and the rest of teh RationalWiki about frotting. I endeavoured to explain it to my friend Mark using my superior linguistic skills (which are quite well honed when I'm drunk (i.e. now)) Like me, he'd had more than enough beer to find it hilarious but at the same disgusting, and my in-depth detailing of said sexual act resulted in him nearly vomiting on a lovely young girl standing next to us. So in summary, thank you for giving me a bit of real life "lulz." All the best old chap. SJ ^Debaser 00:13, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

Next time ask him about Walrus-Rape -

Imagine, you are tied naked to a chair in some dimly lit basement somewhere. A guy wants the facts but you aint talking, blood drips from your broken nose and you are now missing all but 2 toenails but still, you keep your lips sealed. The guy nods to the men standing in the shawdows just beyond your line of sight. You hear a door open and something begins shuffling and moaning like a banshee on heat behind you. "Jesus, what the fuck is that sound" you start thinking. Terror begins ticking up the spine as the smell of rotting fish and seal envelops you. Suddenly you are pushed from behind, you fall to your knees and realise now there was a reason for the hole in the seat of the chair. With your anus exposed you take a look behind you, and fucking jesus, theres a goddamn walrus coming for me! It shuffles forward, emboldened by the fresh scent of fear and rectul juices. You scream, you plead, you tell all, but it is too late. With a giant howl the walrus thuds forward, its wobbly pink erection pieces the shadows and you feel two flippers crash against your back. Then everything goes dark. Aceⁱ⁹ 00:39, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

I honestly thought Josh's story was going to end with him talking about not being able to talk to his friend any more because they both thought it would be awesome to try frotting whilst drunk. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 13:14, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

Cgb07305

Is that necessary, it is not like he has resumed doing it? - π 04:45, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

He is being a cunt and deleted a whole load of pages. Sure, he can be resysoped anytime but perhaps he could explain himself and why he vaped all those pages. he isn't blocked, just defrocked. Aceⁱ⁹ 04:47, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

Far enough. Wish we had that Ghannie thing so we could discuss this now. - π 04:49, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

Well here is a good test case. A guy goes freaking nuts, turns into an ass and deletes many pages, so we desysop and ask for an explanation. Don't mean to "take charge" but, you know, WTF. Aceⁱ⁹ 04:51, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

I have enjoyed watching you throw your weight around, blocking TK, reverting MC. A bit more balls like that at the start and we would not be in this mess. - π 04:53, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

I am not trying to throw my weight around, just get shit done. We can't continue with "The Mission" until we get rid of the terrible, time wasting, distractions. Aceⁱ⁹ 04:56, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

I'm going to state my peace in the most calm and collected manner I can. Ace, I have yet to see you write one article pertaining to "the mission" here. Rather, you go to talk boards and agitate otherwise reasonable people. You have tested my patience to its absolute maximum because you say things like you want to get on board with this mission and yet you never do...not once. I'm not saying you shouldn't be here. I'm saying you shouldn't get in the way. It would be great if you learned a bit of science and started writing about that. After all, that is the main reason for this blog in the first place. If I have missed something and am being unfair when I state that you have given this blog no significant science or other substantial contributions, please refute me.

Desysoping and vandal binning me served no purpose at all except to agitate me to the point that I really don't want to contribute here any more until fuckers like you wield no power. It's really unfortunate (especially given the timing) because I could have contributed a lot of very useful stuff around here. I guess that's the what the blog gets when it allows shit to keep rolling. δ_ij$^{i.broke.it.}$ 19:41, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

• Spontaneous human combustion
• Rods
• Spring Heeled Jack
• Quantum Computer
• The Monkey Man of Delhi
• Aetherius Society
• Mermaid
• Hunter Thompson
• Oscar Zeta Acosta
• Large Hadron Collider

All created by me, that's just off the top of my head. So go fuck yourself. Aceⁱ⁹ 19:48, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

And another fucking thing, while you are here. I don't need to prove myself to an obvious prick like you. If you don't like me that's you problem. You know nothing of my education, scientific acumen or knowledge, my life, fucking nada buddy. Yet you think you can post here and lecture me? Get over yourself buddy. Aceⁱ⁹ 20:01, 2 March 2010 (UTC)P.S - as stated on your talkpage and evidenced in the logs I never vandal binned you.

I hope you both know that your hatred of each other was started as the result of a Roman senator-turned internet psychopath's trolling, and that, to keep fighting with that in mind is, in my opinion, beneath both of you. The Spikey Punk ^{I'm punking my punk!} 22:50, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Actaully no Goonie. I don't hate anyone for a start secondly the only time I ever came across Cgb07305 in any angry manner was when he started deleting pages. So desysoped him to make him stop. He accused me of vandal binning him (which I did not). That was the end of it until he posts all this fucking gibberish on my page today. Nothing to do with MC. Aceⁱ⁹ 22:58, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Perhaps you are right, Ace. I just know that Cgb's venting comes from said incident, and that whole thing that spawned it was as a result of he and TomMoore getting pissed at each other over some of MC's bullshit and then the "joy" from that spread all over the wiki amongst the various users and such. AnarchoGoon ^{Swatting Assflys is how I earn my living} 23:42, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Well, Goonie my friend, all I did was stop the guy from deleting pages, no blocking or binning, just desysoping. Then I get the above abuse for no appearent reason, weeks later, which I have every right to answer and answer with with the amount of respect he deserves after making such an ill-informed comment. Aceⁱ⁹ 23:44, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

No, I agree. I'm just saying (and it was just as much a response to him as your fine self) that it's about time that whole thing die off. But I agree that you were just an innocent bystander in the whole thing, since it was mostly TomMoore vs. Cgb, et al. Lord Goonie ^{Hooray! I'm helping!} 23:47, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Refuting psuedo-science by writing an article on how humans spontaneously combust? I don't understand...where is the refuting in that article? The last sentence? I came here for several reasons. You attacked me here. You made the claim that I didn't explain my actions here. My actions were not against you but your actions were against me. I don't need to defend my actions because all my actions did were against myself. I deleted stuff that I created. You had absolutely no right to even try to stop me from changing my intellectual property in any way. Just because I place it here, doesn't mean I forfeit my right to it. I park my car in public all the time, but I don't forfeit my right to it, do I? Your actions deprived me of my right to my property, essentially locking me off from it. There is no way you are going to make me feel sorry for "poor little you" after you did that. Don't pretend you're innocent in all of this. Don't touch my stuff or get in the way of me accessing my intellectual property in any way. δ_ij$^{i.broke.it.}$ 17:20, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

OK then, enough of your trolling. Be gone the spleen venting venomous froth that gibbers and lolls off your tongue like an oily fat man falling from a massage table. Aceⁱ⁹ 18:44, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

Mind cluing me in?

Jeebus Crust, I was gone for a few days to clear my head of a shitload of personal shit, and come back with everybody at eachothers' throats and talks of some "Loya Jirga" thingy. Mind cluing me in? The Goonie 1 ^{What's this button do? Uh oh....} 20:25, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

It is a lot to read but, in a nutsell, it'll be a group of elected 'crats who during a one month period will moderate and attempt to avoid HCM's. Just a "commitee" of sorts. Have a read of the associated forums. Aceⁱ⁹ 20:27, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

a can of catfood destined for District 9, a World of Warcraft gnome, a white ninja, and some crack cocaine

19:19, 2 February 2010 (UTC)

Ball and chain

Unless I'm confusing you with someone else (which is quite possible), aren't you getting married in a few days? If so, I bid you congratulations and wish you the best of luck. Try not to get too drunk on your wedding. Tetronian ^{you're clueless} 03:18, 3 February 2010 (UTC)

Na, I am next year. This feb I have 3 weddings and three bachelors to attend, plus a concert, my mothers 60th birthday party to arrange/attend. Fucking nightmare that'll only get through by ingesting everything that comes my way so I can have the right kind of energy. Aceⁱ⁹ 04:02, 3 February 2010 (UTC)

me! me! me! :p

Well I'm glad you finally took time out of your love-fest with TK ("butter-cup", "sweet heart", "doll") to post to me.. I was getting jealous! hehe Refugee^{talk page} 00:07, 4 February 2010 (UTC)

I couldn't resist! Aceⁱ⁹ 00:09, 4 February 2010 (UTC)

Thanks, but...

File:Photo 143.jpg

"ARGH!!! GOD!!!!! THIS IS AMAZING!"

...I've already had one arsefucking experience. Which was incidentally caught on film. SJ ^Debaser 00:32, 9 February 2010 (UTC)

Dear Ace

Hi 01:05, 10 February 2010 (UTC)

When's the last time you listened to Daydream Nation and what were you wearing? 01:05, 10 February 2010 (UTC)

Errrr I don't know. I haven't slept poperly for days and the air tastes funny. Things keep happening in real life, strange blustering idiots need me and my life is dictated by the hour. Down to the fucking wire. Aceⁱ⁹ 04:17, 10 February 2010 (UTC)

You're supposed to get drunk with and fight those strange blustering idiots. And then make up and frot. 04:30, 10 February 2010 (UTC)

Dear Ace

When I go "knock knock" you go "who's there?" Ok?

Me: Knock knock! You: Who's there?
Me: When are you going to pull your dick out of that sheep and be my friend again?

Sincerely Yours, 14:54, 13 February 2010 (UTC)

Oh, and

18:11, 13 February 2010 (UTC)

w

I got you a beer. [1] -- =w= 07:49, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

Thanks Mei. I love Heineken. Aceⁱ⁹ 08:05, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

Thank you Ace ^______^ I couldn't tell what it was but it looked very pretty. -- =w= 08:17, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

I got you a video.

16:38, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

thanks!

I'm excited to join! I started on wikipedia last July but left in December due to an aggressive admin. I was recently disenfranched with conservapedia but I am glad the truth is out there!! Thanks! Tommy0210 (talk) 23:23, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

I am a quite a big deal around here. Aceⁱ⁹ 23:25, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

care to elaborate? I hope that wasn't threatening Tommy0210 (talk) 23:44, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

Whenever he says anything, the rest of us say "big deal!" --Kels (talk) 00:13, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

I started using this new technology of wiki back in 1964. I am User #187 at wikipedia. Aceⁱ⁹ 00:18, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

lol Tommy0210 (talk) 00:30, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

He also runs a business we can't tell you about that has him rubbing elbows with the Canadian Prime Minister and numerous Wikipedia bureaucrats. 00:38, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

The Matriarch

She bathed in two units of blood today. After turning up at the counter this morning requesting a "table for four and the wine list" I requested that she be only be given the blood of virgins. I do believe they complied. Rad McCool (talk) 07:34, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

Kill the poor

Tonight. SJ ^Debaser 03:13, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Jane Fonda on the screen today. Convinced the liberals "it's okay, so let's get dressed and dance away the night." Lord of the Goons ^{The official spikey-haired skeptical punk} 06:00, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Hi TK!

Are you a "senior admin"?

May it please the Senior Admin to grovel before his Highness for a few crumbs and suffer a lowly edit to an article, or you should just go ahead and range block me for 5 years.

Hello! Aceⁱ⁹ 06:32, 23 February 2010 (UTC)

Skype

Hi dude, haven't said hello in a while. Do you log onto skype still or am I just on at the wrong times? Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 21:42, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

I have moved flat and don't have my internet up and running yet. Aceⁱ⁹ 21:43, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

I have it now :) thanks to Nutty's generosity in sending me a sheepfucking camera! Maybe I'll catch you one day, Crundy. ħuman 04:19, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

KK. Ace, btw, it was a troll page. Remove and move on. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 22:36, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

We don't do that. Welcome to RationalWiki. -- Mei (talk) 22:39, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

I know it was a troll page but we have never removed one before - why start now? Aceⁱ⁹ 22:40, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Fine, let MC run the fucking place again. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 22:42, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

P.S. Thanks Mei, I've only been around a few days. I'll get the hang of this soon. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 22:44, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

No problem Crundy. ^________^ I hope only to be useful for people. -- Mei (talk) 22:46, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Crundy, fucking relax man. It's just a fucking page. Big fucking deal, just vandal bin the IP's and leave it that. We don't need to start deleting pages because of some stupid fuck trolling. Aceⁱ⁹ 22:46, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Bollocks. You used to have the right attitide towards MC, then you got all soft. Then all this shit happened. Oh and Mei, you are about as useful as a condom machine in the Vatican. Fuck you all. Crundy^{Talk nerdy to me} 22:51, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

You having your period Crundy? Getting all hot and bothered over some low level trolling? Jesus man, pull yourself together. Aceⁱ⁹ 22:53, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

You crazy son-of-a-gun!!!!!

How tricks, Ace? The Spikey Punk ^{I'm punking my punk!} 23:52, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Shit buddy I have had a hectic last 4 weeks. 3 weddings, 2 bachelors parties, shifted house, 2 hip hop gigs, a few BBQ's, late nights, visits from overseas members of my family and my partners family. It all culminated with a late night high speed burn down the freeway, my blood running pure liquor and my girl navigating the vehicle with the perfection of a formula one driver. Now I can rest. Aceⁱ⁹ 00:03, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

Rest?!?!? Who needs rest when they can just down five or six 5-hour energy drinks and ten or twelve Amp Energy drinks? Punky ^{Your mental puke relief} 00:06, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

Ah, that sort of thing doesn't work on me. I need more than caffeine for my special energy. Never mind, going away to Samoa for 10 days late March. I'll rest then. Aceⁱ⁹ 00:08, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

5-hour isn't caffeine heavy. Instead it's loaded with other energy crap. But, have fun in Samoa. Gawd, what I wouldn't give to get the fuck out of Minnesota for a few weeks! The Goonie Punk ^{Can't sleep, clowns will eat me!} 00:11, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

10 days on the beach with a good book. Something fiction I reckon, I haven't read fiction for a good many months. Everything I drink must come out of a coconut shell and have a parasol. Aceⁱ⁹ 00:17, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

Hey

Thanks for stopping by my page. I edit other wiki occasionally, but I don't have a lot of time to dedicate to it so I help where I can. ^{— Unsigned, by: D Means / talk / contribs}

More than welcome, friend. Aceⁱ⁹ 18:44, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

Finally!

Iron Maiden is finally coming within 300 miles of here this summer! Aboriginal Noise ^{with 4 M's and a silent Q} 14:19, 5 March 2010 (UTC)

Make sure to go because, hot damn, they are good. Aceⁱ⁹ 19:28, 5 March 2010 (UTC)

Drug addict

Does using these drug count as being a drug addict?

• Amphetamine
• Dextroamphetamine
• Lisdexamfetamine
• Methylphenidate
• Ethylphenidate
• Oxycodone
• Oxymorphone (metabolite of oxycodone)
• Opium
• Propylhexedrine
• Dextromethorphan
• Dextrorphan (dextromethorphan metabolite)
• Heroin
• 6-Monoacetylmorphine (metabolite of heroin)
• Morphine
• Codeine
• Lysergic acid amide
• 5-hydroxy-dimethyltryptamine
• Kava Kava
• Nitrous oxide
• Cannabis
• Ethanol
• Tobacco
• Butulbital
• Alprazolam
• Lorazepam
• Clonazepam
• MDPV
• JWH-018
• 2C-E
• 2C-T-2
• Buprenorphine
• Cocaine (Coca)
• Diethyl ether
• Phenibut

Lol, I will create an account, I want to add some Wikipedia style liberal bias.

Using, no. Being chemically dependent on them, yes. - π 04:50, 6 March 2010 (UTC)

Heh. OK.....I got you beat though.......Aceⁱ⁹ 04:55, 6 March 2010 (UTC)

Well I am in drug treatment, and I wasn't trying to have a e-dick contest. Oh well, at least I have something I can contribute to wiki's (the number one article I edit on wikipedia is methamphetamine with 130+ edits ;) C6541 (talk) 05:08, 6 March 2010 (UTC)

CP used to have a good recipe for meth. Me, I like mushrooms and pot. Beyond that, I avoid the hard stuff--except Ambien and NyQuil for sleepy-time fun....TheoryOfPractice (talk) 05:09, 6 March 2010 (UTC)

For someone who doesn't want an e-dick contest you sure go to great lengths. Aceⁱ⁹ 05:13, 6 March 2010 (UTC)

I try, I do, I really do. I was actually being sarcastic cause I am an addict. Oh and I guess that meth synthesis had too much liberal bias. C6541 (talk) 05:21, 6 March 2010 (UTC)

Is OK, I been there one or more times so I sympathise. Aceⁱ⁹ 05:38, 6 March 2010 (UTC)

Lol, I'm fine, I'm a functional addict (I think thats the term) although I did beat heroin and speed, now I just chug cough syrup and chain smoke and have the occasional opium tea. TL;DR, a lot better than before. C6541 (talk) 05:49, 6 March 2010 (UTC)

Could you be as useful as Mei

and restore this. - π 01:27, 7 March 2010 (UTC)

errrr, what? Aceⁱ⁹ 01:35, 7 March 2010 (UTC)

About that stuff

I'll try to keep doing that stuff, that stuff that needs doing. ;D C6541 (talk) 07:38, 8 March 2010 (UTC)

Its better than doing other stuff. Such as the chores Mrs. McWicked keeps foisting upon me. Aceⁱ⁹ 08:06, 8 March 2010 (UTC)

I'm sorry about those chores and stuff, maybe you should stuff that stuff into more stuff to make it look like you did stuff. C6541 (talk) 08:32, 8 March 2010 (UTC)

Never mind, I grabbed a whole bag of stuff and took it down the path to the kerb and left it in a pile with other peoples stuff. Tomorrow morning a truck full of stuff will arrive and take all my stuff away to the stuff repository. Aceⁱ⁹ 08:38, 8 March 2010 (UTC)

About time that stuff got stuffed into other peoples' stuff so the truck with stuff could stuff it in it's stuffed compartment. 08:50, 8 March 2010 (UTC)

You are a sick deviant

Don't posT yr Deviancy anywere near mY page scumbag.^{— Unsigned, by: Jon / talk / contribs}

Yeah I am a deviant and my fiancee fucking loves it. Aceⁱ⁹ 22:45, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

Well thAts all weLL and good bt dfnt force me view sick Disgusting homosexual pornograpjy as that is Sexual Harrasmment. Jon (talk) 22:46, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

Dont be such a fucking prude. Aceⁱ⁹ 22:47, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

Don't we have a nice picture of an aroused lizard man? For the life of me I can't find it, but it might be a nice compromise. --^{Ask me about your mother} 22:48, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

Lets see, would he be as upset if I were to post a piccy of two young (over 18 of course) women 69ing? 22:50, 11 March 2010 (UTC)   ^Contribs_Talk

if yoiu force me to view ur sick degenerate material i will BRing it to the InterNational Court of HumAn Rightss. Jon (talk) 22:51, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

Thinking of you, buddy. 23:51, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

Ping!

You have mail! 05:16, 12 March 2010 (UTC)   ^Contribs_Talk

BTW got your email SusanG, you are forgiven sister. 05:38, 12 March 2010 (UTC)

Got it, replied, filed away for later consideration. Aceⁱ⁹ 09:33, 12 March 2010 (UTC)