Fun talk:Andrew Schlafly/Archive2

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White hair?[edit]

Why does his hair turn white when he edits conservapedia? --Staple? 21:11, 23 May 2007 (CDT)

Uh. Does Conservapedia have some unkown properties that I know about? -Icewedge 21:12, 23 May 2007 (CDT)
Because he turns into a hideous demoniacal monster when he edits Conservapedia, if you hadn't noticed. --Linus(Plot evil tech) 21:29, 23 May 2007 (CDT)
So white hair makes a person hideous? --Staple? 14:50, 24 May 2007 (CDT)
I was referring to the whole zombie-esque appearance change in the image. --Linus(plot evil tech) 18:41, 24 May 2007 (CDT)
I think the joke is that when editing CP he becomes completely negative. Mad Min 00:48, 26 May 2007 (CDT)

Wow, I love "sysop" priveilieges (where do thei's and e's go?!?!?!?), I can roll back a dumbass edit I made after someone already fixed things! humanbe in 22:41, 25 May 2007 (CDT)

Here's a fun on for you..

I don't get the problem with vaccines. I have researched these myself, and much misinformation is out there. I have spoken with several pediatricians, and only a few actually read the literature. Most of them just think, "Hey, the FDA approved it, the CDC recommends it, I'm insured, we have the adverse reaction vaccination fund, the state passed laws to make it seem like it is required to go to school, why bother when I have so many ear infections to diagnose." I have talked with my State's Department of Health, and many of these professionals (who study it) agree with my points on vaccinations. That being said, I generally do not try to make what I know too public because, well, part of the reason I skip some vaccines is the marginal benefit decreases in a highly vaccinated society while the risk is pretty much constant. The CDC, FDA, etc., do macro-analysis, but I found a pediatrician who, like me, prefers to do micro-analysis on a patient by patient basis. Maybe I can debate PalMD on vaccinations (though, like I said, I really don't want to encourage widespread refusal to get vaccinations.) HeartGold tx 23:05, 25 May 2007 (CDT)

You seem seem to want to benefit from "herd immunity" without paying in.--PalMD-Talk 23:21, 25 May 2007 (CDT)

If anybody wants to debate childhood vaccinations, please see: Vaccine Debate. Opps, signing. HeartGold tx 23:23, 25 May 2007 (CDT)
I'm afraid I don't understand the link.--PalMD-Talk 23:23, 25 May 2007 (CDT)
I moved this here, as appropriate? It's something he wrote. I added it. Let's add everything he wrote, and discuss his, um, you know, publications? humanbe in 23:55, 25 May 2007 (CDT)

When i click on the link, I dont get anything i understand...some newsletter--PalMD-Talk 23:57, 25 May 2007 (CDT)

So my not understanding it wasn't just because I don't know about the AMA or medicare... --jtltalk 00:07, 26 May 2007 (CDT)

I went there to check, and had to whore over my email address, but it was some article written by ashfly. As if I want to read it. I've had enough of his, um, poop. POOP. 00:19, 26 May 2007 (CDT)

Weird. I didn't give 'em an email address or anything, just get to a crazy-sounding article. --jtltalk 00:31, 26 May 2007 (CDT)


This man needs to get a freakin thesaurus. How many times can you use deceit in one sentence?? "Isn't it amazing how liberals defend deceit??? Not only do some people delight in deceit, but then some people get indignant when deceit is exposed. Really, this is too much."--Aschlafly 19:12, 31 May 2007 (EDT) This guy must have a big freakin hardon for "deceit".Prof0705 19:38, 31 May 2007 (CDT)

Do you know how to footnote that part of the article with a permalink to the comment you just quoted? It's a winner, that's for sure. humanbe in 19:51, 31 May 2007 (CDT)
Sorry man, but I'm wiki-illiterate.Prof0705 19:59, 31 May 2007 (CDT)
OK, here's how. Go to the page that displays what you want. Click on "permanent link" on the left. The page will reload, but the url will say something like diff=45289 at the end. Copy the url from your browser. Then paste it in after the quote, preceding it with <ref> and folloing it with </ref>. That's all there is to it! humanbe in 20:09, 31 May 2007 (CDT)
It's a new hard-on, though. I can't find any cases of him using it prior to starting the Deceit page on April 20th. Just minutes after that, he started his now-familiar litany, and right after that he said something which might explain the just overwhelming resistance to including any Conservative deceit on that page: "Our entry on deceit will grow, and you will see that there is a higher correlation with liberal views than conservative ones.". Does he actually think his list-o-liberal-deceits is proof of something? --jtltalk 20:04, 31 May 2007 (CDT)

Well fuck, this is the same guy that said "I'm 95 percent sure I know what your ideologies are" and then presented it as fact. "proof", "fact", "sources" these are words that just get in the way of his aims.Prof0705 20:10, 31 May 2007 (CDT)

"I do know, with 95% certainty, what your positions are on classroom prayer and evolution. The 95% confidence level is all that science requires. I know your positions with greater certainty than I know what the weather will be like tomorrow." Aschlafly 10:26, 25 May 2007


Andy clearly has at most a very tentative grip on reality. His paranoia of liberal infiltration/deceit/mockery/crucifixion of jesus/etc is becoming progressively clearer to everyone. How long before he locks himself away from the world a la Howard Hughes? I can't really seeing him building a gigantic "Spruce Goose" type plane, but I could see him building a gigantic wooden arc... olliegrind 14:24, 8 June 2007 (CDT)

I think the poor chap has lost it. I had a look at his edit history on WP [1] & [2]. If that is an example of the kind of thing that motivated him to start his CP based crusade against WP he comes over as an upset little schoolboy off in a huff because he didn't get his own way. He edits were silly too. WhatIsG0ing0n 04:41, 26 June 2007 (CDT)
Only the seriously deluded could produce things like this. Perhaps we should start a collection. "The Delusions of Aschafly". On the other hand it is appearing increasingly clear that the man needs help. Perhaps we shouldn't laugh but offer our sympathies to him and his family for the unfortunate suffering they surely endure. WhatIsG0ing0n 04:50, 26 June 2007 (CDT)
Do you know how long an article about that topic would be? It might bring down the internets and clog the tubes. Jrssr5 13:40, 27 June 2007 (CDT)

Andrew Schlafly teaches little boys[edit]

OK, so a previously unknown ip address has just removed this caption from the Ashfly picture with the comment: "Homophobic" comment removed. I'm not quite sure what was homophobic but do we have any thoughts on this? -- Stevo (talk) 13:20, 27 June 2007 (CDT)

That picture has had an illustrious history of snarky comments, I see no reason for it to change. ; ) liessmokemirrors 13:22, 27 June 2007 (CDT)

I put it back as "little children". He's an all-purpose potential pedophile, after all. humanbe in 13:25, 27 June 2007 (CDT)
Human changed it to "teaches little children" which should be fine, (scary but fine). It's not overtly homophobic except to consider when tarring homosexuals as Bad People, CP might argue that some will be in the public school sector for the unspoken "you know what" reason. Having it here does disservice to GLBT people. That's my take on it. ~~ CЯacke® 13:27, 27 June 2007 (CDT)
  • Footnote:shares traits of pedophiles, no evidence of actual pedophilia.--DoxXox-DawkT0wk 13:28, 27 June 2007 (CDT)
This wouldn't be a homophobic comment, but a (possibly) pedophobic(pedopheliphobic?) comment. olliegrind 13:36, 27 June 2007 (CDT)
Yeah I still don't quite understand. The caption was insinuating pedophilic tendencies - surely that rather outweighs the matter of whether it was homosexual pedophilia or not? -- Stevo (talk) 13:40, 27 June 2007 (CDT)
Wouldn't it be homophobic to assume that a comment is homophobic? Jrssr5 13:42, 27 June 2007 (CDT)
Why not just say "This man hangs out in chat rooms with 15 year olds" (true) and have done with it? humanbe in 13:43, 27 June 2007 (CDT)
Surely to a Conservative, homosexual paedophilia trumps regular paedophilia...XP liessmokemirrors 13:44, 27 June 2007 (CDT)
What about catholic conservatives? olliegrind 13:44, 27 June 2007 (CDT)

Removing own(?!) liberal bias[edit]

Wait a moment?! did he just remove the edits that he originally put in as liberal bias? --Shagie 16:24, 29 June 2007 (CDT)

Nah, couldn't be[edit]

Think Andy is with it enough to be referring to the version done by The Clash? or is he just reaching back to the days of his youth hiding in the basement w/o friends listening to vinyl? And Andy ... the song title is just I Fought The Law. Jrssr5 07:55, 13 July 2007 (CDT)

First, whassamatta with the Bobby Fuller Four version (Other than it having none of the energy and sense of genuineness of the Clash version)? Second, um, when the Clash were releasing their music, it was on, er, vinyl (and tape, of course). The CD hadn't been invented yet. Lots of vinyl. Lots of cool singles, picture sleeves, 12" singles with cool extra songs... man, I don't know how I could afford to buy them all! And the buttons and posters... humanbe in 12:32, 13 July 2007 (CDT)
Ok so my attempt to make fun of him fell flat on its face. And there's nothing wrong with the other versions, I just find it funny that he'd make a reference like that. Jrssr5 13:11, 13 July 2007 (CDT)


I want to address the overall quality of this article. It is now on the first page if one googles Mr. Schlassfly, and so it may very well be serving as the "face" of RW to a few, if not many, people.

We can be as mean as we want, but I think we should make sure to footnote our meanness. This is because he deserves it.

Can we expand upon his "writings" and comment on them each, briefly?

I think the nostradmaus thing is kinda funny, but I'd love to see another section before it. Just can't think of what it should say. Feedback, ideas?

Oh, and should it have that conservapedia template thingie? humanbe in 20:11, 13 July 2007 (CDT)


Youre right, this needs serious work.--PalMD-Goatspeed! 21:01, 13 July 2007 (CDT)

I'm concerned that 1. it is factual and not just nasty, 2. that it is roll on the floor funny in places, and that 3. the links out of the article are also pretty good. humanbe in 21:08, 13 July 2007 (CDT)


I notice someone added some funny parts about Andy being homeschooled, but does anyone have any evidence that he actually was? According to Wikipedia, Andy is an alumnus of Saint Louis Priory School [3] which is a private, male, Catholic school for grades 7-12. It don't doubt that he never went to public school, but I don't see anywhere where he says that he was homeschooled. I wonder how he knows that it is the best way for kids to be educated... --Brian 10:22, 15 July 2007 (CDT)

It was user:Jtg0819, and it's a bit clumsy, too. I'm not sure whether we should wipe it and start again with the childhood section. I'm all for a good laugh, but this looks, well, made up. Can't we find some "truth" and just say it funny? humanbe in 13:45, 15 July 2007 (CDT)

Yeah sorry about that, I was kind of bored at four in the morning and decided to do a little creative writing exercise. By the way, I'm wiki illiterate in case this doesn't look right. Jtg0819 15:30, 15 July 2007 (CDT)


Golden Boy was an engineer? I don't remember hearing that before, did I just miss something? --Kels 21:22, 26 July 2007 (CDT)

Yes, he is an engineer. Resident vandal
Add to best of CP? Of course he is an engineer. And a scientist, etc....... humanbe in 21:26, 26 July 2007 (CDT)
And maybe a cowboy? --Kels 21:57, 26 July 2007 (CDT)
And an astronaut!!!--PalMD-Goatspeed! 22:01, 26 July 2007 (CDT)
And a... groomer.. Sick fuckin bastard. humanbe in 22:04, 26 July 2007 (CDT)

IP address?[edit]

Can we use this [ [4] tool to identify what he and other sysops are doing or have done at Wikipedia? You can read about it at Wired today [5] Doggedpersistance 14:07, 14 August 2007 (CDT)

  • Bohdan?
  • Brian Macdonald - who is this? He claims not to be TK - probably not Conservative either ('ken'), or DanH ('daniel', obviously) - I'd go with Geo or Karajou.
  • Conservative.

We have all the digits!

מְתֻרְגְּמָן וִיקִי שְׁלֹום!

Important question![edit]

Does Andy qualify as an internet kook? -Smyth 15:01, 28 September 2007 (EDT)

Just as much as any Silence of the Lambs character would, I guess. --Edgerunner76 15:02, 28 September 2007 (EDT)

A picture[edit]

Does anyone have any objections to putting this picture into this article? If not, then....can someone put it in? Even though I made the picture, I know someone other than me can insert it seamlessly into the article with greater skill than me. I figure that the pic would go well with the other andy-meme combo pics in the article, if incorporated well. (preferable with a "IMMA CHARGIN MY (something) caption)-- ♠ ŖєuĻєəux ♠say wнäτ? 15:19, 3 October 2007 (EDT)

Personally, I despise Shoop stuff, but that's just me I guess. I can't complain too much, seeing as I'm the one that mudkipped him. --Kels 15:20, 3 October 2007 (EDT)
This is why I wanted to wait before just changing it, to get some people's opinions. I'll wait and see if some more people share their thoughts to see if/when I/someone else puts the pic in. -- ♠ ŖєuĻєəux ♠say wнäτ? 15:26, 3 October 2007 (EDT)
Strikes me that particular one would work better in a UBX or something, but I dunno. That small might not look all that hot either. --Kels 16:20, 3 October 2007 (EDT)
User page maybe, but I don't think it would make the article better... humanbe in 16:42, 3 October 2007 (EDT)

An ED-style meme house of horrors :p? --

Well, if you want to take the mudkip one down too, since it's pretty much on the same theme, feel free. I've already got it on my userpage anyhow. --Kels 17:32, 3 October 2007 (EDT)
Hmmm, how about a special section at the end for the various artwork/photoshopped pictures? Something like "Gallery of deceitful liberal mockery"? humanbe in 18:01, 3 October 2007 (EDT)
Oh, I like that idea! -- ♠ ŖєuĻєəux ♠say wнäτ? 19:08, 3 October 2007 (EDT)
Let's do it, then. humanbe in 19:14, 3 October 2007 (EDT)
=D -- ♠ ŖєuĻєəux ♠say wнäτ? 19:16, 3 October 2007 (EDT)
OK, I moved two and added yours. Now, formatting - WP has a "new" thing that allows creating a horizontal row of things like these without using a table. Anyone know how to do it? I'll set up a table for now... humanbe in 19:18, 3 October 2007 (EDT)
(Note, simply using three "thumbs" seems to work ok, though might be ugly on smaller screens. We still need that new MW trick) humanbe in 20:20, 3 October 2007 (EDT)
W00t! I give my thanks to AutoFire, for thinking of a good caption. The best caption I could think of at the time-of-upload was "IMMA CHARGIN MY BANHAMMER" or something of the like. For some reason i couldn't think of the phrase "Godspeed", lol. I am very tired today.-- ♠ ŖєuĻєəux ♠say wнäτ? 20:15, 3 October 2007 (EDT)

Did anybody know about this?[edit]

Amusing. — Unsigned, by: Jayjay4ever / talk / contribs

Nice selection of seasonal brews, I'll admit. Tom Schlafly done good with his life, I reckon. NorsemanWassail! 22:48, 19 October 2007 (EDT)


This parody has no more reckless disregard than the one Hustler did of Jerry Falwell. And that was upheld in court. Researcher 11:51, 20 November 2007 (EST)

He's right, you know, Andy. Parody ≠ false statement of fact.-αmεσ (soldier) 11:53, 20 November 2007 (EST)
Either way, couldn't we just call it revelation instead of parody? God told us all of this information. I'd like to see someone prove us wrong. --Edgerunner76 12:15, 20 November 2007 (EST)

A Schlafly's qualifications[edit]

Copied from WIGO

Have anybode seen A Schafley's degree certificates or his Phd thesis or anything to prove he is wot e ses e is? (or his birth certificate for that matter! [to prove he's human!]) Susanpurrrrr ... 22:03, 29 November 2007 (EST)

I found this. He's got a BS in electrical engineering and computer science and a law degree.-Shangrala 22:19, 29 November 2007 (EST)
Sure, but if he has nothing to hide, why doesn't he produce the actual documents?--PalMD-If it looks like a donut, eat it 22:21, 29 November 2007 (EST)
That's self written (& assuming it's got the credibility of Eagle Forum) - I want a personal letter. Susanpurrrrr ... 22:27, 29 November 2007 (EST)
He does seem kind of dense for either an engineer, (I wonder if it was Amtrak or Conrail?), or a magma cum laud over to Harvard Law Skewl. 22:31, 29 November 2007 (EST) CЯacke®
It is well known that the sons of famous people are admitted to ivy league schools with lower qualifications than others. Given that they were admitted on false premises, any degrees that may exist are not consistent with the dictionary definition of a "degree", that is, earned.--PalMD-If it looks like a donut, eat it 22:36, 29 November 2007 (EST)
RationalWiki has unveiled the deceitful hoax!!!11212one one @!121elven!!! Andrew fucking Schlafly, Eskwire, is a dolt NOT A REAL LAWYER!!@!2312!@!!oneone!!!1 It was a title bought for him by mommies' friends, and not PEER FUCKING REVIEWED! Sorry. humanUser talk:Human 00:30, 30 November 2007 (EST)
Could it be true? What irony if so. Incidentally the above ink leads to this article Legal Implications Of a Link Between Abortion and Breast Cancer apparently written by him. Done't know if Palm (or Ames) feels like making a comment.--Bobbing up 09:19, 30 November 2007 (EST)

Could this be Schlafly?[edit]


Though I have no clue why he'd be concerned about McDonalds junk food... -- 09:27, 4 December 2007 (EST)

The IP traces back to Solaris: out of WI. While CP's IP is — Unsigned, by: Geek / talk / contribs
IP look-up for this gives Wisconsin Rapids as the location. Unlikely to be Andy. But hey, who says he thinks all this stuff up on his own? Jollyfish.gifGenghis Marauding 09:51, 4 December 2007 (EST)

Narr, someone trying to cover commercial bias with accusation of liberal bias. Susanpurrrrr ... 09:58, 4 December 2007 (EST)

But this might be?[edit]

Even money. 10:26, 4 December 2007 (EST) CЯacke®

If he was editing back in August 2005, why didn't he start Conservapedia until later? He must have other edits elsewhere, for example an edit to Jews saying they are the "superior race". AMA88 10:37, 4 December 2007 (EST)
Good find Cracker. Jollyfish.gifGenghis Marauding 11:09, 4 December 2007 (EST)
Aw, you even left him a nice little note. Ha, I used my visit to WP to revert some vandalism to "Big Mac"! I'm a wiki-hero... humanUser talk:Human 14:22, 4 December 2007 (EST)
"If he was editing back in August 2005, why didn't he start Conservapedia until later?"
I think Conservative Christians love a good Creation myth. There are strong similarities between the mythology of George Washington and Jesus Christ. And there is certainly a creation mythology about the the United States - all that cherry-tree stuff, Paul Revere (John the Baptist?) and Betsy Ross (Mary Magdelene). OK, for a correct analogy it should be Adam & Eve but I think you get my point, there IS a religious correlation. The founding of CP has achieved a similar mythological standing - the BCE date quote from a student, the reversions of Andy's edits on WP by liebruls. Messiah complex? - I never said a thing. Jollyfish.gifGenghis Marauding 15:13, 4 December 2007 (EST)
Yeah, I'd believe it if someone said assfly simply made up the CP creation myth. Having seen how willing he is to make up any other "facts" he wants to at his "blog". humanUser talk:Human 15:20, 4 December 2007 (EST)


this article needs lolcats. "I'm in yr innertubes poizining yr chillenz" or "Im on yr komputer showing my emty brainz" or somesuch. humanUser talk:Human 16:15, 7 December 2007 (EST)

--librul-- --DECEITS--.JPG
Somesuch? UchihaKATON! 12:42, 4 January 2008 (EST)
That is certainly headed in the right direction, yes! humanUser talk:Human 20:27, 4 January 2008 (EST)

Conversational Terrorism[edit]

I found this wonderful page that almost reads like Andy's talk page comments...

Lets see if we can find examples for each of them... I know it won't be too hard to find:

"I'd like to respond to that, but taking into account your background, education, and intelligence, I am quite sure that you would not be able to understand."
"You mentioned the constitution. Can you quote the preamble for us?"
"I have observed that those who disagree with me on the next point tend to be unsophisticated, and those who quickly recognize the validity of the point to be more educated. The point is...."
"So you would just like to kill off anyone who disagrees with you, it appears!"
This one would be good for PJR too... [6]
"I don't think we can go on until we establish the scientific validity of that last statement."
"This question could only come from the confusion of the ______ mind-set."

Ehh ghads... fun page to browse. --Shagie 04:58, 15 December 2007 (EST)


Am I missing something? Why doesn't Andy like CP being labeled creationist (or words to that affect)? --Edgerunner76 12:47, 4 January 2008 (EST)

I think it's because he likes to think he speaks for all conservatives, which in a sense is a much larger group. As a result, many people here on RW hate all conservatives, because Andy conflates his weirdness with the much larger political group that he is on the fringe of. To be accurate, CP is a "Young earth creationist Christian conservative cuckoo" (in that order) propaganda sewer. — Unsigned, by: Human / talk / contribs
So does that mean that we have OECs, YECS, and YECCCCs? :) --Edgerunner76 12:47, 4 January 2008 (EST)


"To the manner born" is from Hamlet, describing someone who is born into a custom or act. A few centuries later, a few people began writing it as "to the manor born" almost meaning someone who is born well-to-do. The page though clearly describes people as born to lying, thus manner born. Researcher 14:50, 3 January 2008 (EST)


it' either! Susanclaw! ... 14:51, 3 January 2008 (EST)

He's still a loon, either way........ XD SpicaFor Fuck's Sake....! 14:53, 3 January 2008 (EST)


I really doubt this should be in the first sentence:

"is the reincarnation of the Titan, ΕΠΙΜΗΘΕΥΣ (Epimetheus, literally "AFTERTHOUGHT"),"

Everything else in that paragraph is backed up by observable and fairly repeatable evidence. This line is just unprovable, low appeal snark. Put it under "Did you know?", maybe? humanUser talk:Human 09:39, 14 January 2008 (EST)

Done. - ΠΡΟΜΗΘΕΥΣ - FORETHOUGHT 09:46, 14 January 2008 (EST)

I have a theory (just like Intelligent Design)[edit]

That Andy was sexualy abused in boyscouts by one of the librul gays. This would explain his unabashed hate for the libruls and gays to the point of repressing common sense. (Either that or he caught his gay brother jerking it on his bed when he was younger). Oh the reference to intelligent design is based on the total lack of evidence and expermentation for this claim, just like intelligent design (prove to me that I am wrong).--TimS 09:48, 14 January 2008 (EST)

my theory:
He suckled @ his mommy's tit 'til he got wed. Men don't have busooms so he thinks it's a waste of time. SusanPurrrrrrr 09:57, 14 January 2008 (EST)
Interesting but it does not show why he has the hates for the gays and the libruls. Gays and libruls have breasts like straights and conservatives (not used as often...) YOU NEED TO PROVIDE MORE PROOF TO PROVE I AM WRONG OR THIS IS JUST ANOTHER LIBRUL ATTEMPT AGAINST GOD!!!!--TimS 10:03, 14 January 2008 (EST)
Maybe it was both - or he caught gay bro trying to suckle? SusanPurrrrrrr 10:17, 14 January 2008 (EST)
Or, a simpler, more parsimonious theory backed by, um, er "facts" (oh well, there goes the fun!) - Andy was abused as a child by his nutjob conservative mommy. Ipso facto delirium tremens demonstrandum. humanUser talk:Human 10:20, 14 January 2008 (EST)

Btw - where's papa all this time? SusanPurrrrrrr 10:26, 14 January 2008 (EST)

Papa was teaching John (the gay one).-- 11:16, 14 January 2008 (EST)
Wasn't Papa a rolling stone? Wherever he laid his hat, that's his home? ;) Spica 15:25, 14 January 2008 (EST)
No, this one made his children cringe and cry "Papa don't preach"... humanUser talk:Human 16:22, 14 January 2008 (EST)

Schlafly Dodge[edit]

What about Andy's habits lately of dodging the question/issue at hand by criticizing spelling/grammar mistakes or by harping on one small and unrelated part of a post rather than the point the poster is making. I'm sure this is an old technique and has some latin name but Assfly seams to have it down. He can usually bend any argument into something about school prayer by dropping his famous line about a corollary between something and school prayer and then jumping on the poster for saying something about it. BeastmasterGeneral 11:45, 28 January 2008 (EST)

Google rankings[edit]

It pays to be careful when claiming a Google ranking as different results are returned by different Googles. Although this article is No. 8 on it is still No. 10 on Jollyfish.gifGenghis Marauding 07:15, 31 January 2008 (EST)

No. 8 is no. 8. We don't censor the facts here, Genghis. Please continue contributing to this valuable talk, talk, talk resource. Thanks and goatspeed! --AKjeldsenGodspeed! 07:34, 31 January 2008 (EST)
A check on this morning actually shows this article as No.6! Way to go! Jollyfish.gifGenghis Marauding 03:18, 1 February 2008 (EST)


  • God has promised Andy that he can break open one of the Seven Seals come Judgement Day. The details are yet to be firmed up with the Lamb, but Andy has his fingers crossed for the sixth and fondly imagines himself tearing it wide open with a fearsome cry of "Godspeed!" He has been known to spill his seed during these daydreams, but God assured him that it's OK if he's only fantasizing about smiting, and hasn't touched his pee-pee in a bad way.

I reluctantly agree with the removal of this section... Funny as it is, offensive ad hominems like this (though well-deserved) might detract a little from other, more important points on the subject. Plus "he's a pedo!" is a joke that doesn't always ripen with age. UchihaKATON! 22:31, 4 February 2008 (EST)

I agree. But, "He's a groomer" has worn well. In a certain disgusting kind of way. humanUser talk:Human 02:29, 5 February 2008 (EST)
Ack. I was quite proud of that gag, not least because I believe that he probably is the type to derive some kind of smug satisfaction from the thought of all the mockers and unbelievers facing the Terrifying Reality of the ApocalypseTM. I'm happy for it to be binned if people don't think it's funny, but it seems a waste to sacrifice it in the hunt for a Wikipedia EL that RW simply isn't going to get. Unsurprisingly, then, I vote for me gag's punchline to be reinstated. ;) --Robledo 14:37, 5 February 2008 (EST)
I vote for re-inclusion per Robledo's point as to why it was deleted. It's not like "WP" said "remove that joke and you're in" - just one editor used it as an example of why they have no sense of humor think RW shouldn't be EL'd. And I think it's funny, too. humanUser talk:Human 15:02, 5 February 2008 (EST)
The offending paragraph must go. I just can't stand the idea of something cheaper and more juvenile than me on this site. -- ereh seog egap klat ym ot knil suoiralihnamuħ   16:15, 5 February 2008 (EST)
I'd insert a snarky comment here, but I'm honestly drawing a blank. Well done. --AKjeldsenGodspeed! 16:26, 5 February 2008 (EST)
All his assfly belong to MEH!!!!Phallus of Satan 16:30, 5 February 2008 (EST)

Is it just me?[edit]

Or is Andy going even more insane than before? I haven't checked the history of his CP edits or WIGO entries on him, but I have the definite impression that his end of 2007 and 2008 edits have reached a new dimension. He wasn't as much persecuted by Liberals, was he? There was "Liberal bias", but I wouldn't imagine the "old" Andy defining a "liberal substitute of love". Discuss. Editor at CPBring TK back 11:13, 11 February 2008 (EST)

Nothing to discuss - the man's barking mad! SusanMiouw 11:27, 11 February 2008 (EST)
I find him one of teh interweb's most fascinating personalities. His increasing paranoia about liberals is true car-crash entertainment. What will Andy do next? Bondurant 11:31, 11 February 2008 (EST)
I would agree that he is becoming more unstable-appearing. His edit patterns, timing, even the subtle details point to someone who is kinda losing it. IMHO. User:DocSock
What's he gonna do when Obama gets in? SusanMiouw 11:39, 11 February 2008 (EST)
I feel so too. Accusations of liberal bias, shredding of logic and the occasional 2nd grade essay existed before but now the first two seem constant, like a knee-jerk reation to being questioned. Then out of nowhere there's the occasional what-the-fuck Shaken Hollywood President garbage. If the opposite wasn't more likely, I would guess it was TK's departure that made him loonier. NightFlareSpeak, mortal 12:12, 11 February 2008 (EST)
I always saw TK as the centurion to Andy's Pontius Pilate (as portrayed in the Life of Brian). He would normally intercede and eject people before Andy started on his loony ramblings. Now he's just like an enormous GIGO machine. Jollyfish.gifGenghis Marauding 12:20, 11 February 2008 (EST)

Yes! There's more voices of (un)reason getting pen to paper now the TK Rotweiler's gone. SusanMiouw 12:34, 11 February 2008 (EST)

I agree... it used to be that if an editor argued with teh assfly 1.5 times, they got banahammered by TK. Kookookajou kind of picked up the mantle after TK left, but with nowhere near the, er, enthusiasm or, um, effectiveness. So now Andy is left floundering further and further into his weirdness with each new interlocutor. humanUser talk:Human 14:02, 11 February 2008 (EST)
I really think some of the sysops are finally realizing how far off his rocker Andy really is, and is letting him dig his own holes. I find it so hard to believe that any other sysop there can truly back Andy after he's repeatedly proved wrong by simple research. Jrssr5 12:38, 11 February 2008 (EST)
Sysops like PJR seem to be happy just to have blogging rights for their own whacky points of view, so it's best to stay on the good side of Jehovah, alias Andy the Righteous. CP is the Old Testament universe in miniature. PoorEd 12:51, 11 February 2008 (EST)


How can it be, that if I search for "Saint" in RW, the first Page text match is Andrew Schlafly? No technical explanations please, I take it as a sign from the Almighty. Editor at CPBring TK back 06:47, 12 February 2008 (EST)

That is weird, since it's only in a link. You'd think actual saints, like Ronald Reagan, would get priority. humanUser talk:Human 15:47, 12 February 2008 (EST)
Or Dan. DoggedamesP 15:48, 12 February 2008 (EST)
A closet saint? Editor at CPBring TK back 15:54, 12 February 2008 (EST)


WTF?!?! Is Karajou the stick? I don't get it...PFoster 14:04, 25 February 2008 (EST)

Good analysis! But I think we're just redirecting as many vegetables as possible to this guy.-αmεσ (soldier) 14:05, 25 February 2008 (EST)

OH NOESS!![edit]


New link[edit]

"What's really funny, is that Andy himself has done teh deceitz."

That link is really opaque. Where and what in there is teh assfly using teh deceits? humanUser talk:Human 18:53, 26 February 2008 (EST)

Child sex abuse jokes...[edit]

...aren't really "lulzy" as far as I can tell - but maybe it's just me. There are a few of them here - a couple hidden in links. Do we really need them? Isn't there enough to pick on with Assfly that that really isn't necessary? Opinions? PFoster 21:05, 27 February 2008 (EST)

Meh. I sort of see them as a parody of Assfly's logic. "Well it's true!!!!" and it is. He uses it all the time. Like all his claims about Obama; you can't prove them wrong, so they stay. He probably doesn't molest children, but until we have 100% proof that he doesn't, it's a perfectly valid (by Schlafly logic) thing to mention. DickTurpis 21:15, 27 February 2008 (EST)
How about removing the sly refs to it and imserting a paraphrase of what Dick just said in a new section ("Schlafly and child abuse allegations")? humanUser talk:Human 21:20, 27 February 2008 (EST)
I still say he is a groomer. 21:43, 27 February 2008 (EST)

As rag man[edit]

As halfway funny as most of them are, I think we should just make a subarticle for them and link to it. It's too easy with the wordpress generator to come up with various half-assed mockeries. Thoughts? Now, the real challenge that would require some "creativity" would be making Haiku entirely out of Schlaflygrams. Any takers? humanUser talk:Human 16:48, 28 February 2008 (EST)

I'll take it. I don't know what you're talking about, but why turn down what's free? --Star of David.png Radioactive afikomen Please ignore all my awful pre-2014 comments. 16:50, 28 February 2008 (EST)
Should we wait for a third to agree with your proposal, or may we do it now? --Star of David.png Radioactive afikomen Please ignore all my awful pre-2014 comments. 16:52, 28 February 2008 (EST)
Uh, nevermind. You seem to have already done so. Darn my slow reaction time! --Star of David.png Radioactive afikomen Please ignore all my awful pre-2014 comments. 16:53, 28 February 2008 (EST)
Hehe. The section was getting bloated, and it needed subheaders, which would have messed up the main TOC, etc. So I done did it. Now for the anagram haikus! humanUser talk:Human 16:57, 28 February 2008 (EST)
I'd get right on that, except none of the anagrams are with 5 or 7 syllables. Doesn't he have a middle name or something? :-( --AKjeldsenGodspeed! 14:19, 29 February 2008 (EST)
Each line is not limited to one anagram. The haiku should, though, be a string of anagrams in a row, allowing them to run from one line to the next. humanUser talk:Human 14:41, 29 February 2008 (EST)


The bad news: We're slipping! Searching for Andrew Schlafly (without quotes) in Google, RationalWiki is only #17. "Andrew Schlafly" with quotes yields us as #12. Andy's turd on and an official release by him outrank us. And for some bizarre reason US Newswiener (whoops!) Newswire claims he is a "nationally noted medical attorney" [7]. By whose standards?

The good news: Conwebwatch appears as number three for both. Jon Swift's post on Conservapedia ranks #6 without quotes, #5 with.

Whatever happened to our precious #8 spot? We were so close to the top! Everybody with a website, start linking frantically to the Andrew Schlafly page here! --Star of David.png Radioactive afikomen Please ignore all my awful pre-2014 comments. 01:36, 6 March 2008 (EST)


DP - you can't embed an external image.  :( Jollyfish.gifGenghis Marauding 14:11, 17 March 2008 (EDT)

Poetry and songs[edit]

While I think they are cool, they are beginning to take up a lot of space - what think we of moving them to a subpage, like we did with the anagrams? humanUser talk:Human 15:42, 17 March 2008 (EDT)


I wonder why no mention of his days at AT&T on this page? -=-CЯacke® 17:36, 24 March 2008 (EDT)

Gee, I wonder? humanUser talk:Human 17:38, 24 March 2008 (EDT)
I also get a kick out of the abrupt font shift in that "bio"! humanUser talk:Human 17:46, 24 March 2008 (EDT)

Link's dead, H[edit]

Might've been the greatest gag in the world, but now it just leads to an error message. What was the gag, btw? --Robledo 23:51, 26 March 2008 (EDT)

Oh, I'm sorry. He must have flushed his talk page to hide something embarrassing. Basically he outright claimed what was in our article - the trying more cases than most lawyers thing. Which is hilarious, since he is just an incompetent corporate lawyer. Can we revert to your version, but reinsert that line, since it really is true, and was sourced until teh assfly burned the evidence? Or better yet, put your edits back in one section at a time so folks can follow what you're doing? Thanks... humanUser talk:Human 00:08, 27 March 2008 (EDT)

Gregory Peck[edit]

So, I was walking thru Blockbuster with "mini" Phyllis Schlafly, trying to pick out a movie to watch, when I noticed an Andy Schlafly clone on a movie cover. Gregory Peck (plays Atticus Finch in To Kill a Mockingbird) does have a rather striking resemblance to him, don't ya think? I also uploaded two pictures for use on this article or others. ^_^ Fuzzy|AFD 16:51, 30 March 2008 (EDT)

Well spotted! Maybe we need to start a separated at birth article. Jollyfish.gifGenghis Marauding 16:53, 30 March 2008 (EDT)
Thanks, but those Peck shots are probably copyright, and there's no fair use justification to use them to parody someone else. humanUser talk:Human 17:03, 30 March 2008 (EDT)

"Personal Conversations"[edit]

Umm, I actually haven't had that many personal conversations with Andy.. I think I've had x<10. I did hear his real laugh and the story behind his fake laugh while I was over their house.. =_= Fuzzy|AFD 08:11, 31 March 2008 (EDT)

Feel free to rewrite the footnote to reflect reality (it is partly a parody of a few footnotes he has left on CP, like "personal conversation with Justice so-and-so). I had assumed, correctly I hope, that you added this based on personal experience, and wanted it to be documented so it would survive random de-snarking. Thanks! humanUser talk:Human 13:42, 31 March 2008 (EDT)
Hang on, is this the Kektklik from CP? Doesn't he say on his talk page he's an impostor? DickTurpis 13:59, 31 March 2008 (EDT)
It might be. Or it might be an impostor. That's good enough for me :) humanUser talk:Human 14:31, 31 March 2008 (EDT)
Decide for thyself. It does not matter which I am. Real or not. You can choose how to take my words, whether you throw them out or take them as a breath and believe it to be absolute truth. I do not care. I am a neutral figure. If my "edits" are taken as vandalism, so be it. If they are contradictory to that of Kektklik or any other user on CP, oh well. =_= Fuzzy|AFD 15:05, 31 March 2008 (EDT)

Can you fit this in?[edit]

Andrew Schlafly son of Phyllis Schlafly is the editor and horrible dictator in charge of Conservapedia. He rules Conservapedia and blocks all unfortunate little editors who can't agree with him all the time and are too high principled to pretend they agree. — Unsigned, by: Barbara Shack / talk / contribs

What you've said is true, but I believe that's already supposed to be subtly implied throughout the existing content of the article. UchihaKATON! 19:22, 31 March 2008 (EDT)
Yes, Barbara, I think we have that covered, in spades. Thanks, though! humanUser talk:Human 20:29, 31 March 2008 (EDT)

[[Category:Control Freaks]]

I've put it into the Liberapedia article on Andy. I don't suppose you want it in both. By the way I’ve been blocked for a month at Unicyclopedia for starting an article about Schlafly there with that comment. I’ll bear the blow with fortitude. I’m glad I found somewhere for it so I won’t suffer for nothing. Now Great Big Schlafly is bullied by tiny little me? A new definition of bullying. Internet blocks can become a way of bullying. Barbara Shack 09:51, 1 April 2008 (EDT)

Hahaha, Barbara, I think the mistake you made at UC was adding "truth", or "facts", to an article. Don't they frown on that? humanUser talk:Human 13:26, 1 April 2008 (EDT)

I can't do much here today. I'm tired. Liberapedia has been under attack from Nazi vandals yesterday when it was late at night here in Britain. Today there was another attack but not so bad.Barbara Shack 14:36, 1 April 2008 (EDT) In my block log they wrote cyberbullying. Perhaps if I'd made it up instead of telling the truth they'd have minded less. I also wrote that Phyllis Schlafly thinks it's OK for husbands to rape their wives. They deleted that so I can't show you. They probably thought that was a slander. Who would believe that? Barbara Shack 14:29, 1 April 2008 (EDT)

Haha, maybe they don't know who Andrew is, so they thought you were just attacking someone you knew? But, really, the problem is that you are adding facts to UC, and they don't approve of facts. Everything in UC is supposed to be untrue. So maybe you should write a glowing biography of him there? humanUser talk:Human 14:38, 1 April 2008 (EDT)

Great idea! I'll do it when the block's expired. They've protected the article though. It may be difficult.Barbara Shack 15:02, 1 April 2008 (EDT)

Wow, you're patient ;) Couple of ideas - one would be to write it at "Andy Schlafly", another would be to write it in a sandbox, then ask a sysop to unprotect so you can copy it over. Good luck with it whatever you do, though. humanUser talk:Human 18:08, 1 April 2008 (EDT)